Arranged Love

An Indian Boy’s Search in Amrika To

Find A Suitable Girl

A Story By Ajay Patel

Writers Club Press

San Jose New York Lincoln Shanghai

Arranged Love An Indian Boy’s Search in Amrika To Find A Suitable Girl

All Rights Reserved © 2002 by Ajay Patel

No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping, or by any information storage retrieval system, without the permission in writing from the publisher.

Writers Club Press

an imprint of iUniverse, Inc.

For information address:

iUniverse, Inc.

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Lincoln, NE 68512

www.iuniverse.com

This is a work of fiction. All events, locations, institutions, themes, persons, characters, and plot are completely fictional. Any resemblance to places or persons, living or deceased, are of the invention of the author.

ISBN: 0-595-22742-2

ISBN: 978-1-4697-7621-7(eBook)

Printed in the United States of America

Contents

Preface

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2

3

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7

8

9

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3

4

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Preface

I am not a writer by profession, which is why I feel that the following pages are better described as a simple story instead of a book. In Mark Twain fashion I would like to emphasize that while the characters may be one dimensional, the stereotypes patently obvious, the conflicts Rated G Disney clean, and the plot as predictable as a Hindi filum,itis important to me that an interesting story be told. In fact, when I first started writing, I thought this story was largely my story based on my experiences as I searched for an Indian wife in America. What really surprised me, however, was that as much as it is my story, it is also the story of many others like me. A story of my generation, growing up in America, assimilating, yet still having enough of a cultural desire to find a soul mate of the same ethnic and cultural background. Because it is more of an our story as opposed to a my story, I felt even a stronger desire to write about it so that others who will be taking part in our story can have an idea of what to expect.

Writing our story served another important purpose for me. It served as a cathartic release for many of my emotions. This is because our story can be, at times, emotionally exasperating. But through all of the pages, I hope one message is made clear. Don’t give up hope. Our story can be a long and draining one. It can be full of disappointment and painful experiences. Surviving through these times is important because there is happiness to be found at the end of the journey. We all can find that perfect person if we look hard enough. It’s neither selfish nor idealistic. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.

To the many friends and acquaintances I met during our story, much of what follows may sound familiar. I want to express my appreciation in your willingness to hear and talk about it the first time, and sincerely hope you don’t mind reading about it again.

PRE-ARRANGED

1

The End of the Beginning

Vijay dreaded visiting home tonight. His visits to Yorba Linda, a quiet suburb fifty miles from his apartment in Los Angeles and known mostly for being the birthplace of Richard Nixon, had consistently proven to be full of tension recently. It troubled him that he felt this way.

His papa and mummi, known as Jayendrabhai and Shantiben Patel by their friends, had lived in the same four bedroom, two and a half bath home for years and had emigrated from India to Amrika, their embarrassing way of pronouncing America, when he was only two months old. Despite the frequent differences inevitable in a household where the parents had grown up under customs and a culture different from those of their children, his memories of his childhood were generally pleasant ones. It helped, despite the generational and cultural differences, that Vijay’s parents were fairly tolerant and understanding—at least relative to other Indian parents raising kids in America.

In fact, Jayendrabhai and Shantiben only had to be tolerant towards Vijay. Vijay’s older brother, referred to often by them as the “why can’t you be like Rohit, he is such a dayo chokro” son, had dutifully followed, without question, all of the edicts set forth by his parents, including those involving dating, schooling, and attending family and “auntie uncle” functions. Rohit, a shorter, skinnier, and less assimilated version of Vijay had a Napoleonic air of entitlement about him because he was the elder sibling, more than twelve years older than Vijay, which alone would have been enough to explain the great difference in personalities between them. But added to this age difference was the fact that when the family had moved from India, Vijay was only an infant while Rohit was practically a teenager. Because of this, Rohit’s personality was rooted in Indian customs just as firmly as Vijay’s was rooted in American ones.

As an orthopedic surgeon, Rohit was the equivalent of an Indian god in the eyes of their family and Indian society in general. This was not to say that Vijay was merely a member of the congregation in comparison. Rohit, although brilliant in the sciences, often had trouble communicating his thoughts either verbally or on paper. This was largely because English was his fourth language (Gujarati, the local language from the state of Gujarat in India, being his first, Hindi, the national language of India, being his second, and science, as he had explained to Vijay thousands of times, the universal language, being his third). Vijay, on the other hand, spoke and communicated with eloquence. He enjoyed debating, mostly in arguments over useless issues with his parents while growing up. With this skill well honed by the time he had graduated college, he knew that law school, not medical school, was the proper calling for him.

Vijay had been out of law school for over a year now, having graduated with honors from Boalt Hall in Berkeley. He was recruited by and worked at a prestigious law firm in downtown Los Angeles. Even though he had become successful as an attorney, every now and then there were jokes made from his relatives that he still was the black sheep in the family for having chosen the “liberal arts” as opposed to the “sciences” path. This attitude was borne largely from the reality that as much as lawyers were joked about and held in derision in America, it was nothing compared to how lawyers were regarded in India. When Shantiben had told relatives in India that Vijay had decided to become a lawyer, the first thing that the relatives could say was “Oh, did he not do well in his studies?” The stereotypes had been cast by his family and the community and had been carried over to America, and overcoming them had proven exhausting for Vijay. However, these stereotypes and comparisons were not the cause of Vijay’s uneasiness as he stood at the front door of the house tonight. No, the tension and uneasiness stemmed from the fact that he was there with Jennifer.

Jennifer had light brown hair bordering on blond accompanied with striking blue eyes. Vijay could never tell whether his impression of her eyes being striking was based on the fact that they really were striking or just because he came from an Indian background where everyone had brown eyes unless they wore colored contacts. With high heels on, she stood five feet ten inches tall, an equal in height to Vijay although Amazonian relative to the height of most Indian women. In fact, when they visited his family, she seemed to stoop and slump ever so slightly, perhaps to try and bridge the gap in distance between her and Vijay’s mother who barely cleared five feet in height.

Vijay and Jennifer had been together for over three years now. Having met in law school, they spent a good deal of their first year studying together. The study breaks that came every hour where they would, as a rule, talk about anything but the law, made them realize that they had quite a bit in common, including an attraction to each other. Their relationship slowly blossomed, and before Vijay knew it, he had his first serious girlfriend after several brief and less serious girlfriends in college.

While they were at Berkeley, the first years of their relationship were effortless. Perhaps it was because they both were away from home and parents with school being the only thing to distract them. Now, however, the relationship required effort. They had both moved back to Los Angeles and feelings of easiness and comfort were often interrupted by feelings of uneasiness and tension. Thinking back on it, Vijay realized he first started having these negative feelings the day he had introduced Jennifer to his parents.

Even though Jayendrabhai and Shantiben were more tolerant than most Indian parents would have been about Vijay’s often-unconventional choices, when Vijay told them last year about his relationship with Jennifer, it was not welcome news. They had difficulty in accepting the fact that their son was dating someone who was not Gujarati, let alone Indian. Vijay insisted and pleaded, however, that as his parents and his family grew to know Jennifer, they would see all the things that he saw in her and would realize how he had so fallen in love. To their credit, after the initial shock and disappointment wore off, they tried to make an effort, as did other family and friends. The results, however, were not always as he would have liked them to be.

Vijay remembered the first of several disasters nine months ago at his cousin Sejal’s wedding. It was Jennifer’s first Indian wedding and she was excited. She surprised him at the front door of her apartment by wearing an exquisite turquoise sari which had taken forty-five minutes for her and two of Vijay’s female Indian friends to wrap around her properly. Vijay stood in his suit and tie at the foot of the steps, amazed at how beautiful and exotic she looked. However, when they arrived at the wedding, numerous stares and looks of an all-together different nature greeted them. It almost seemed that wherever they walked, they left a wake of whispered “can you imagine?” and “how inappropriate!” Vijay couldn’t tell if the comments were because Jennifer was dressed in Indian clothes or whether it was a larger issue based on the fact that he was even with a “Jennifer.”

As much as Vijay felt the stares and heard the whispers, Jennifer felt and heard them more. They didn’t even last through the whole wedding before she said she had to leave. In the car ride home she started crying, realizing how difficult it would be to fit in, how simply putting on a sari and wearing a bindi would never satisfy everyone.

The story was much the same at other Indian events that they attended as well. Throughout all of this, Vijay realized that his relationship with Jennifer would always be viewed with skepticism and disfavor, perhaps just like his choice to become a lawyer as opposed to a doctor.

Although he had keys, Vijay knocked on the front door to warn everyone inside of their arrival. He looked at Jennifer and said in a pleading tone under his breath, “Honey, in two hours it will be over. I know it’s difficult and awkward coming here, but my parents are trying.”

“The fact that they have to try to like me is NOT a good thing,” she said curtly, refusing to look at him.

“Give them time. They’ll grow to love you. Just as must as they love Vaishali.”

Vaishali was Rohit’s wife. Vijay remembered when the family first introduced Rohit to the concept of marriage and Vaishali three years ago.

“Rohit, papa and I believe it is time that you have thoughts of marriage,” Shantiben had spoken from one end of the couch after a rented Bollywood DVD of Kuch Kuch Hota Hai on the television screen had come to an end. What followed was the attack most single Indian children faced from their parents when they reached that age of twenty-something. Rohit relented without much protest, obedient as usual, with his only condition being that he would like to marry someone from India with traditional values. Before anyone could blink, the tickets to India were booked.

Rohit gave himself three weeks to find his bride and get engaged, if not married. He thought that would be plenty of time. He explained to Vijay that many of his friends had found successful matches in less than two weeks and that the whole country was geared to generate a wedding with only a few days’ notice. “Besides”, he said to him on the plane ride to India, “I’m not only a successful doctor, but a green card holder as well!”

“You sound like a bad American Express commercial,” Vijay groaned.

Disregarding Vijay, Rohit continued to speak out loud as he fantasized about his future wife with a smile on his face, “The parents will be lined up around the block for a chance to have their daughter marry someone as qualified as me…” He made it all sound like a job interview.

Vijay was still not sold on the arranged marriage idea, although he had heard the arguments their parents had launched at Rohit. Vijay asked Rohit, “How can you possibly find a life partner within a matter of a few days? Don’t you want to take the time to get to know the woman you’re going to spend the rest of your life with, to make sure that she’s the right one for you?” Vijay thought about how slowly and carefully he had cultivated his relationship with Jennifer.

Rohit replied in a thoughtful voice, “Marriage is like being on a deserted island with only one woman. Although you may not be sure what she will be like and she may not be all that you hope for, you have to, and eventually can and will make it work.” Vijay just shook his head, deciding it was hopeless to try and explain to Rohit what true effortless love could really be like.

Surprisingly, however, everything was just as Rohit had said it would be. A schedule of interviews with daughters and their parents had been arranged for Rohit and the family at their Mota Kaka’s flat in Bombay.

For the longest time while growing up Vijay had assumed that his father’s oldest brother was named Mota Kaka. When he was just a child, he had innocently asked his father why their last name was Patel instead of Kaka, fearing that the reason involved some scandal with multiple wives. To that his father laughed out loud, explaining that Mota Kaka’s name was Narendra Patel, but since he was Vijay’s and Rohit’s eldest uncle, they were supposed to, out of respect, call him Mota Kaka, which loosely translated to “big uncle”. His father explained that even when he spoke to him, he called him Mota Bhai, which meant “big brother”. Having been told that this was just a nickname, Vijay expected, when he went to India for the first time at the age of eight, to find a large, towering, and bulky person of Buddha like proportions greeting him at the door. He was surprised, however, to find that his Mota Kaka was anything but big, instead being slight of build and wispy with a large gold Seiko watch that always hung loosely near his wrist because his forearms were so thin.

As they cleared the long customs line at the dank smelling airport in Bombay, Mota Kaka greeted them with an excited wave of his arm, his Seiko watch sliding around his wrist trying to keep up with the motion. He excitedly told them that their visit would be a productive one as he had spread word in the community that his nephew from the US was looking for matrimonial prospects. He explained that Rohit would have many girls who were “good catches” to choose from.

Each “interview” that their Mota Kaka had arranged involved a family and their daughter coming to the flat for a social visit and introductions over a cup of chai and a plate of laddoos, which were dense, overwhelmingly sweet pastries made primarily from ghee, the equivalent of butter. Normally such types of meetings involved the potential groom and his family visiting the potential bride’s family at their house, but this was not possible given the number of girls that had to be met by Rohit and the time constraints involved before they had to return to America. After three “interviews” in a span of seven hours on just the first day, Rohit had seen enough. He agreed to marry Vaishali. Vijay often wondered if Rohit had made such a quick decision because he truly had fallen in love or because he was getting fed up with having to drink so many cups of chai and eating so many laddoos.

Vijay’s Bhabbi, the name he was constantly reminded to call Vaishali because she would now be his older brother’s wife, had grown up in Bombay and was fairly “westernized”. This meant that she was college educated with a Masters in Home Sciences, spoke English with only a slight accent, and even dressed, on certain occasions, in blue jeans and Tommy Hilfiger tee shirts.

Vaishali was petite and, unlike Jennifer, short like Vijay’s mother. Although Vaishali was considered “attractive” based on the standard Indian criteria of having fair skin and a slight build, Vijay could only describe her as attractive in an Indian way. He didn’t quite know what he meant by that, other than the fact that no matter how she dressed or looked, she had an appearance about her that would always give away the fact that she had been raised in India, not in the United States. Perhaps this was the case because despite her “westernized” attributes, she nonetheless exhibited the traditional qualities that Rohit so desired such as speaking softly and being deferential. These, among others, were qualities that were not as easily found in Indian women growing up in America. Vaishali doted on her in-laws and was content to be in a supporting and submissive role as opposed to a co-star in Rohit’s life.

Once Vaishali had acclimated to living in America, Vijay had to admit that she had greatly pleased both Rohit and their parents. Her mild disposition and her traditional deferential behavior made her a joy to their mother in particular. Because Vaishali’s family was thousands of miles away in India, she latched onto Shantiben eagerly, thus forming a close bond between daughter-in-law and mother-in-law. Every time Vijay visited home, his mother would gush with pride and happiness as to how she finally had a daughter after having been subjected to two sons for so long, as if that had been some cruel punishment inflicted upon her.

“Your parents are never going to like me as much as they do Vaishali, even if I went to a tanning salon and became the next Martha Stewart!” Jennifer hissed back before the door opened. Vijay could only look back at her with a pleading look before Vijay’s father opened the door to let them in.

Jayendrabhai was an older version of Rohit, equal in height, but slightly heavier in the stomach area despite the recent futile purchase of an ab-roller. He wore eye glasses typical for an Indian electrical engineer of his generation—bulky with thick square lenses that cried out he was not willing to spend the extra twenty dollars to get the featherweight lens option. Upon opening the door he stood a little unsure of himself on how to greet them. Some hosts welcome guests in their home with a colloquial “hi” while others welcome guests more formally with a “hello”. Indians have a combined version which Vijay had once coined as the “hi-hello”. A hi-hello involved a variation of greeting and interrogation of past goings on before the guest has even had a chance to be guided to a seat. Questions regarding the status of health, family, and business often were thrown out as if they were a request for a password in order for entrance to be granted. Vijay’s father generally adhered to this Indian hi-hello custom except when it came to Jennifer. He had never been able to develop that common thread to pull from in order to relate to past goings-on with her. As a result, whenever Jennifer visited, only an awkward but smiled hello greeted her with an accompanying sense of panic as he tried to think of something to say to fill in the gap where the hi otherwise might have been.

Shantiben came to the rescue from behind him announcing that dinner was already prepared and that they need not bother with idle chitchat in the living room when that could be done more efficiently at the dinner table while they all ate. Despite the efficiency, however, dinner went far worse than even Vijay could have anticipated. Jennifer had been able to give up eating with a knife, spoon, and fork so that she too, like Vijay’s family, scooped into her mouth healthy portions of roti, shaak, and daal using only her hands. But despite her breaking down this barrier of difference, there were other barriers that Jayendrabhai and Shantiben maintained that had not yet been broken down, the most apparent of which was communication. Every few minutes Jayendrabhai and Shantiben would unconsciously speak in Gujarati thereby unintentionally shutting Jennifer out of the conversation. Vijay tried to interrupt them so that they would revert back to English, but he was not always quick enough. All Jennifer could do, not understanding a word being spoken during these times, was to try to mimic the expressions of those speaking so that she at least gave the appearance of being a part of the conversation. When Jayendrabhai spoke in a happy tone recalling some discount he had been able to negotiate from an unsuspecting salesman, Jennifer would join in the laughter at the table while waiting for Vijay to offer a brief but delayed translation. Likewise, when Shantiben spoke in a depressing tone about the health problems a family friend was suffering, Jennifer would put on a “that’s terrible” face and slowly shake her head to mirror his mother’s expressions.

Despite Jennifer’s willingness to play-act this way, Vijay could tell that she was feeling left out of the conversation after a long story had been told in Gujarati. Shantiben, too, realized Jennifer was being excluded, so she explained in her halting English, “I am telling Jayendra how the son of a family friend of ours’ is to be getting a divorce and how hard it is being on their family,” she said sadly, conjugating every verb into the present tense not having fully mastered the English language.

Jayendrabhai replied in his attempt to be a part of the conversation, “I told you Niraj’s marriage would never last more than a year when he chose to marry that Italian woman!” Before anyone could stop him with a look of warning he continued, “Those matches always fail because only Indian women are strong enough to make a relationship work!”

Shantiben realized the effect of her husband’s words on Jennifer and quickly tried to do damage control by cutting him short and adding towards Jennifer, “Jayendra is not always knowing of what he is talking about! Of course many girls who are not Indian are good girls, like you…” It was too little too late and getting worse by the minute. An awkward silence followed as Jayendrabhai realized his mistake and chose to put handfuls of food in his mouth as an excuse for not talking anymore.

Vijay knew the night was a disaster. For the rest of the evening, Jennifer no longer chose to play-act during the spouts of Gujarati. She just sat at the table rigidly without speaking to anyone.

The drive back to Los Angeles was a long and quiet one. Vijay, afraid to say anything, could tell Jennifer was upset and in a mood where talking, if it was to be done, would have to be started by her.

As they pulled into her driveway, Jennifer looked at him with tears in her eyes. Vijay knew already what she had to say. She told him how although there was love between them, it did not seem so strong that it could overcome the many obstacles that resulted because there was a “them”. Vijay struggled to think of something to say that could fix everything and make them feel happy like they were in law school all over again. But the continued silence in the car confirmed that there was nothing else to say. He sat there for a moment, in the car, next to her, realizing how tragic it all was. Together, they were two pieces of a puzzle whose edges and cuts, when arranged, fit perfectly with each other. Unfortunately, they were pieces from two very different puzzles that would always have trouble matching with the other pieces around them. And before he knew it, Jennifer and Vijay were no longer a “them.” They would no longer cause a stir at Indian functions. His parents would no longer have to try to make an effort. Vijay sat in the car staring blankly ahead, alone, as Jennifer, crying, ran up the stairs into her apartment, gone from his life.

2

Madame-Ex

“You need to get out! End of discussion! We’re going to a party tonight!” Amit spoke to Vijay emphatically. They sat out on the terrace of a bar sipping half-priced happy hour drinks after work on Friday.

Amit and Vijay had been friends for a little over two years having first run into each other in the lobby of their office building. Like Vijay, Amit had graduated from law school and was working at a different law firm located in the same office building. Sharing experiences about growing up to be an Indian attorney jump-started their friendship. However, as many similarities as there were between him and Amit, there were just as many differences. It was these differences that made them even better friends. Vijay, having lived up in Northern California for three years and also having been in a long-term relationship with Jennifer, had no experience in the Indian singles community. Amit was the complete opposite. He grew up in Los Angeles and had never really left the area going to UCLA for college and USC for law school. As a result, Amit practically knew every Indian in Los Angeles, or at least it felt that way when Vijay was with him at Indian parties.

“Amit, I don’t know about some of these parties you take me to. At the last one, there were all of these FOBs looking at me strangely,” Vijay complained, taking a sip of his Corona, referring to the fresh off the boat crowd that had come to America from India.

“First of all, there’s no such thing as an FOB anymore Vijay,” Amit said, jokingly. “We call them FOAIs now. You know! ‘Fresh off Air India!’”

Vijay shook his head, laughing. “Since you know so much, let me ask you a question. What do they mean when they point at me and call me an ‘Aieebee Seedee’?” Vijay asked.

Amit burst out laughing, putting his hand up and fighting valiantly to not spray the Heineken he was drinking in Vijay’s direction. “They were calling you an ABCD—an American Born Confused Desi!” This was a term the FOAIs threw back at their white washed Indian brethren. “Boy, did they ever get that one right!”

“If you’re just going to make fun of me, I don’t know about going out tonight,” Vijay replied testily. “It’s been a hard week at work. I wouldn’t mind just hanging out at my place watching the Lakers game while I veg on the couch.”

“No way! Just take a nap and be ready tonight!” Amit commanded.

Vijay could have put up more of a fight, but realized there was no talking to Amit. “So whose party are we going to? Vijay asked, admitting defeat.

“This girl Jasmine is throwing the party at her parents’ place while they’re out of town. Do you remember her? She just won Ms. LA India two weeks ago.”

“How could I forget?” Vijay said with a grin on his face. After Jasmine had won the beauty pageant, Vijay had joked “with that title under her belt, it won’t be long before she becomes MRS. L.A. India!”

“It’s your turn to drive and the invite says be there at 9 sharp,” Amit informed Vijay. “So pick me up at 10:30 so we can get there around 11:00.” Their arrival time was based partially on the concepts of being fashionably late and IST, otherwise known as Indian Standard Time, which meant arriving on time meant arriving an hour too early. “And Vijay, please try to look sharp for a change for this party. After all, it’ll be full of beauty pageant types. I’m tired of having all the women hanging all over me all of the time!” he laughed. While Vijay and Amit looked similar from a physical appearance perspective, their styles were exact opposites. Vijay was used to wearing comfortable tee shirts, blue jeans, and running shoes while Amit was more of a Kenneth Cole and Armani production.

“Oh aren’t you just the comedian!” Vijay said sarcastically, rolling his eyes leaving Amit behind to head to his car, wondering what he should wear that evening.

Jasmine’s parents owned three Ramada Inns, one of which was located on prime real estate across the street from Disneyland. Using the current Indian hotel exchange ratios, this meant they were fairly wealthy, and the house Vijay and Amit drove up to reflected this. It was a “souped up” custom home with Indian features, including marble columns and Ganesh statutes that looked oddly out of place in the otherwise Spanish styled ranch house. Walking up the driveway to the house they could already hear the bhangra dance music. From past experiences, Vijay knew that the quality of the guests was directly related to the quality of the deejay. From what Amit was saying, a popular deejay with three CDs currently available for sale at the local Indian music shops had been flown in from New Jersey. Moreover, Jasmine and all her friends would be attending guaranteeing that the “A” crowd would be there, with the “A” standing for attractive.

“Damn! This’ll be the party of the year! How often do you get the chance to hook up with beauty contest winners?” Amit’s excitement grew as they approached the front door.

“I don’t know what you’re so excited about,” Vijay replied, trying to play it cool. “It’s not like you’re going to hook up with Jasmine or anything! She’s been going out with Sushant for over two years.”

“You keep forgetting!” Amit shook his head as if this were the tenth time he was teaching the concept to Vijay. “Although Jasmine may be taken, all of those other single beauty contestants at the pageant are going to be here as well!”

“As if I’d want to lower my standards and hang out with a runner up?” Vijay quipped. The joke, however, fell on deaf ears as Amit was making a scurried dash to get into the party ahead of Vijay.

They entered through double front doors that when opened, released a wave of loud music in their direction. In front of them a velvet rope cordoned off the stairs to the second floor and a darkened living room in a desperate attempt to keep certain rooms free from party damage. Unfortunately, many of the guests had taken the rope as an invitation to go into areas where they might get more privacy, as if they were VIP rooms found often in bars and clubs. Walking to the back of the house they arrived at a large patio and pool area where in one corner, the source of the loud music could be found. A deejay and his inexplicable crew of four assistants were set up, each person assigned only one particular task ranging from loading CDs, hitting the play button, turning on the strobe lights at the appropriate time, and talking in the microphone when appropriate to encourage the crowd to join the fun on the dance floor. In the opposite corner, a table was loaded with trays of appetizers and another table was laden with bottles of alcohol. The fact that there was still free food and alcohol to drink at this hour boded well for the party. But what really convinced Vijay that this would be a party to remember was when he heard Amit exclaim as he stared in the room full of people through the doorway. “Oh my god! Contestants from Ms. San Francisco India, Ms. California India, and Ms. India America are all here!” he sounded like he was reading off of a road map with each destination being a beautiful woman.

“Take it easy and relax! These women know when a man’s hormones are off the chart.” Vijay held Amit back. Instinctively, the two of them went to the bar and mixed themselves some drinks. It never really mattered what they drank. It was just a party ritual of theirs that gave them something to do while they stretched their party muscles and worked up their nerves to go up to women. Once comfortable, with drinks in hand, they began to evaluate the female talent in the room. After identifying appropriately attractive targets that were in the room in pairs, they teamed up and approached them. They met several attractive women this way, all of whom were hoping to break into modeling. These hopes were based largely on their successful training for the numerous fashion shows conveniently sponsored by the local sari boutiques in Cerritos, otherwise known as “Little India” by the locals. And as if almost on cue on every fourth song, each woman interrupted their conversation with excited outbursts and an “Oh my god! This is my favorite song! Do you want to dance?” This interruption, of course, was not seen as an entirely bad thing from their perspectives.

After dancing to a few songs with two of the women they had met, Vijay and Amit left to go back to the bar to get another drink. As they stood there talking, Vijay saw her. She was unlike any other woman at the party. While many of the women they had met were recent or past beauty contestants who had the cute and adorable look designed to win the hearts of audiences and beauty contestant judges alike, the woman who had walked into the far side of the room was altogether different. It was not that she was unattractive. Actually, she was quite stunning. What set her apart from the other women in the room was that she seemed indifferent about appearances. She had no calculated smiles. No fake hellos that she appeared to be peppering left and right. She was a sincere handshake in a room full of fake kiss-kisses.

Amit’s back was the only other witness to this mysterious woman’s entrance. Vijay felt it was his duty to apprise him of her presence.

“You’re not gonna believe the woman that just walked into this room!” Vijay said excitedly.

“Where?” Amit asked without turning around.

“Seven o’clock,” Vijay replied. He didn’t have to say the usual things that had to be said with other guys such as “don’t be obvious” or “don’t look right away”. Amit was a professional.

Amit went the opposite direction to put his glass on a nearby table, and then came back to where he and Vijay were talking. However, by now, Vijay had turned around so that his back now was to the woman, allowing Amit a view of her.

“Say no more” Amit said, having locked in on the woman Vijay had identified, indicating definite approval in his intonation. “But I have to tell you, based on the way she dresses and carries herself, we are talking ultra-high maintenance chick.” The woman was wearing what looked like a designer silk outfit straight out of a fashion magazine that looked expensive, was perfectly tailored for her, and exuded power.

Vijay took another glance in her direction to confirm he was right to focus on her and then asked him, “What’s her story?”

“I don’t know,” Amit professed ignorance. “This is the first I’ve ever seen her. Let’s ask Rocky,” he suggested. Rocky was a friend of Amit’s from college who more importantly was related to Jasmine. This relation had resulted in their invitation to the party and potential additional access to information about the mystery woman walking across the room.

They walked over to him while he was in the process of mixing himself another apple martini. “Rocky, you’ve got to help Vijay here,” Amit said. “Who’s that woman over there?” he pointed to her.

“Yeah! What’s her name? Do you know anything about her?” Vijay was eager for information about the new love of his life.

Rocky looked over to where Amit was discretely pointing and turned back to face them with a look to indicate that additional information would be forthcoming. “Her parents are friends through Jasmine’s mom. I’ve seen her a couple of times at family functions over the years, but not often. She’s bad news. In fact, people call her Madame-Ex, as in ex-girlfriend to a lot of guys,” said Rocky. “She’ll flirt and be friendly. And then once you start to fall for her she drops you like a rock.”

“Are you sure?” Vijay asked, hoping by verifying he’d hear justified reasons for her having such a reputation.

“Definitely,” Rocky responded. “In fact, there’s an interesting story about her,” he said ominously. “There’s this guy back east. He’s a cousin of one of our friends Mani. You know him Amit,” he looked at him, “His name is Jayesh.”

“Yeah. That name rings a bell,” Amit responded vaguely, affirming the stereotype that every Indian knew every other Indian.

“Well, Jayesh was engaged to her,” Rocky directed the word ‘her’ in a warning manner towards the woman across the room.

“And?” Vijay asked, ignoring the theatrics.

“A week before the wedding, this girl’s friends all fly in and they all go out for some wild bachelorette party. They drank all night, and when she came back, she made an ugly scene. She said she finally had come to her senses and realized that Jayesh was a stupid idiot and that she was calling off the wedding!” Rocky said dramatically. “Can you believe it? She did this with less than a week left before the wedding!”

“Are you sure about this?” Vijay asked Rocky, not wanting to believe the beautiful woman across the room was capable of such a despicable act.

“Well, everyone tried to keep it quiet. But stuff like this just gets out. You know how the Indian community is when it comes to finding out about juicy scandals,” Rocky responded. “And that’s not even the worst part! Jayesh had gone all out to get her this special engagement ring because she demanded something that was hugely expensive,” Rocky continued. Amit looked at Vijay with a grin, having had his assessment of her being high-maintenance confirmed. “But when she called off the wedding, she kept the ring!” Rocky ended in a “can you believe it” tone.

“Hey, I remember hearing something about this!” Amit said as this last fact had been the subject of gossip for many months taking on Indian urban myth proportions.

“Gentlemen,” all three of them turned their heads towards her, “There is one woman who has no need for finger jewelry,” Rocky said, pointing at Madame-Ex as she walked out of the room, no doubt ready to devour another victim.

3

Love at 21st Sight

More than a year had passed since the days of Indian beauty pageants and parties. Spring arrived bringing with it the Indian wedding season. Vijay was booked for nine straight weeks having to go to one wedding or another. But it wasn’t just a matter of attending the weddings. There were bachelor parties, engagement parties, and other wedding related events, both on the bride’s side and the groom’s side, that would require his attendance as well. However, this spring was special because Amit was getting married.

It had all started when Amit met Sonia a year and a half ago at an Indian professionals happy hour. Sonia, lonely, because she had just moved to Los Angeles from New York, came to the happy hour in hopes of making new friends. She met Amit at the bar and from that evening on they were inseparable.

Vijay met up with Amit at Anastasia’s Asylum, a small eclectic neighborhood coffee house, which unlike Starbucks, was designed for quiet long discussions and not for fast food coffee distribution. They had spent many an evening listening to music and talking about life here. They didn’t do this much anymore. It seemed to Vijay that ever since Amit had met Sonia, they spent less time hanging out. Now the everyday normal things that gave birth to deep philosophical discussions were no longer held between them, but rather between Amit and Sonia instead.

They sat in the front room of the coffee house in two well-worn overstuffed armchairs with their half-finished cups of coffee resting on a television stand with a chessboard top. Amit by now had brought Vijay up to date on all of the wedding tribulations.

Vijay asked him after both of them contemplated in silence for a few seconds, ready to launch into a new subject of conversation, “Did you know that she was the one when you first saw her? You know, love at first sight?” Vijay was an ardent believer in such things.

Amit took a moment to respond, which clued Vijay in that the answer would come with complications. “There’s no doubt that I liked her the first moment I saw her,” Amit started unconvincingly, noticeably using the word “like” in place of “love”. Then, as if he were about to reveal some deep rooted secret, he leaned over to Vijay and said, “Honestly, and just between you and me, if you were to have asked me that night I had first met her whether I could see myself marrying her, I probably would have said no.”

“So you fell in love with her over time?” Vijay asked with a questioning look, assuming that if Amit was in love now and if it hadn’t happened immediately, that it must have happened slowly.

“Yeah, I think you’re right,” Amit replied thoughtfully closing his eyes. It was almost as if he were mentally checking his day planner to see if he had noted when that feeling had suddenly come about. “But you know, I’m glad it happened slowly like that. Instant attractions can be dangerous.” He leaned forward in his chair after seeing a questioning look on Vijay’s face. “Think about it logically. When you meet someone that you fall in love with in the first second, you haven’t fallen in love because she’s got a great personality or that you have a lot in common. In that first second, the only thing you can fall in love with is how she looks.”

“And this is a problem because...?” Vijay asked, not necessarily seeing the flaw in the love at first sight concept.

“It’s just that…” he was temporarily lost for words to go along with the idea in his mind. “Let me give you an example,” he took a different approach. “Do you remember my older sister’s friend Usha?”

Her name brought instant recognition to Vijay. “We only talked about her for three hours the first time you pointed her out to me. She’s amazing!” Usha was tall, beautiful and engaged to be married by the time Vijay had met her much to his great disappointment.

“She’s no longer married,” Amit replied quietly. “I just found out that she filed for a divorce last month.”

Vijay sat there silent, first in shock and then depressed. Their story was the classic example of love at first sight. Usha’s husband, Chirag, had told a friend when he had first seen her, but long before he had ever worked up the nerve to speak with her, that he had just met his wife. She, too, told everyone that she was already planning their wedding in her mind the very night they first met. To this day, Vijay often wished for something just as magical.

“They looked so incredibly happy together,” Vijay shook his head slowly in disbelief, feeling like a child would when first told there was no such thing as a Santa Claus.

“That’s the whole problem with this love at first sight thing,” explained Amit. “It’s based on ‘sight’—immediate physical attraction. They were so blindly in love because of their physical attraction for each other, that they ignored all the other differences between them. But it was these differences that turned out to be time bombs in the relationship that exploded later on when the attraction started to fade.”

“Maybe there is something to the concept of getting to know someone and growing to fall in love with them like you and Sonia did as opposed to falling in love with someone at first sight,” Vijay said.

“You know, the way you say it, it doesn’t seem exciting and romantic. In fact, it sounds downright geriatric! No, I think of it more as love at twenty-first sight,” Amit said grandly.

“Love at twenty-first sight,” Vijay repeated thoughtfully, staring at his cup of coffee. He still doubted the concept, but sincerely hoped that it would work for Amit.

4

Love at First Sight at Last

Vijay adjusted the buttons to his kurta pajama while looking in the mirror. The shirt was made of plain beige raw silk with a subtle gold pattern around the collar to match the three buttons in the front. While the pants were of similar material, they were tight fitting, unlike the shirt, which hung loosely down to his knees like a Nehru jacket. It was the Friday night before the wedding and he and Amit were getting ready in a room adjacent to the hall where the garba raas program, one of the numerous pre-wedding related events held the night before the ceremony, was about to take place.

Looking at his reflection in the mirror, Vijay thought back to his cousin Sejal’s wedding when he and Jennifer had caused such a stir. It had been over two years ago and much had changed since that day. Back then, Vijay was as whitewashed as an Indian could be. But now, as he looked at himself in the mirror in his Indian clothes, he saw that a dramatic change had come over him. His ties to Indian culture had grown stronger with each passing day. When Vijay had tried to explain this change in him to a friend of his, she explained that when a person approaches their thirties, they come back to their culture, and when a person approaches their sixties, they come back to their religion. The first half certainly seemed to be holding true for Vijay.

Having earlier peered through the door at the crowds arriving, he realized that so many of his friends were Indian now. The similar experiences and cultural values had made it so easy to become friends with them. The common “I had to go through that too!” and “did your parents make you do this?” had served as a built-in foundation to start his new friendships. It then hit him as he stood there looking in the mirror. He realized that this common foundation with other Indians was that intangible piece that he had been lacking with Jennifer.

Could it be? Had he changed? Were his parents right all along? Continuing to stare at his reflection, he came to a revelation. He wanted to share the rest of his life with someone who was Indian. For the first time, he realized he didn’t want this just because it would make his parents happy. He wanted to marry someone Indian because, for some reason that must have been growing inside him these last two years, it would make him happy.

Amit came in through the door, saw Vijay transfixed at his reflection, and said with an impatient laugh, “Come on! Let’s go! Staring at the mirror isn’t going to improve anything!” Vijay flashed him a sheepish grin, having been caught in the act.

When they walked into the main hall in their kurta pajamas, three of their female friends started yelling out catcalls trying to embarrass the both of them. The girls were originally Amit’s friends but were now Sonia’s friends as well.

They strutted over to them and Amit said in a macho voice, “You think we look hot, don’t you? Is that why you were calling us over?”

Nina, the most vocal of the three, responded with a laugh, “We only asked you to come over because Swati wasn’t sure if Vijay’s outfit was the same one that she wore at the last wedding she went to!” She was giving them a hard time because although Indian women usually dressed in traditional clothing for functions, men generally did not, preferring their normal business suits to the dress-like kurta pajamas. Evidently Amit and Vijay’s feelings of awkwardness in wearing these clothes had been apparent and the girls were eager to exploit that fact in friendly fashion.

Swati added, “You know, Nina, now that I see it from a little closer, I think the one that he’s wearing is cuter than the one I have. Vijay, you must tell me when you go shopping so that I can learn from you!” she said in an exaggerated tone.

“You can tell us,” Ami joked, “Did you get it from India Sari Palace?”

“Or maybe from Chetna’s Women’s Fashions?” Nina contributed.

“No. He must have gotten it from Victoria’s Secret!” Swati said with a big laugh. “Funny, they always look better in the catalog!”

“Is that what you said when you tried on the Wonderbra?” Vijay finally fired back with a grin and a high-five to Amit.

With that parting shot, they left the women to meet some of the other arriving guests. As they were walking away, Amit asked Vijay, “Hey, what do you think of Ami? She’s cute and more importantly, she’s single. I bet with a little make up, or well, maybe with a lot of make up, you could make yourself attractive enough so that even she’d like you!”

Vijay shook his head with a grin, as if the idea was so patently out of the question to be even taken seriously. “She just isn’t what I’m looking for.”

“What exactly is it that you’re looking for again?” Amit asked, curious. They hadn’t had this discussion for a while now.

“Honestly, I don’t know. I just feel that when I meet the right person, it’ll feel right. And all I can say is that these last few years I’ve met most everyone in this room and I haven’t felt that right feeling with anyone.” Vijay said with a sigh.

This had been troubling Vijay for some time now. At wedding after wedding, one by one, his friends were all getting married. Tomorrow, Amit would be married as well. As each wedding wound down with a reception, and when the first slow dance was played, Vijay became more and more conscious of the fact that everyone in his group of friends was slowly no longer just friends, but one-half of a couple that attended every event and party together as a unit. Vijay had exaggerated dreams often about how one day everyone he knew would be dancing as couples, and he would be left standing just off of the dance floor with arms folded, alone.

As the guests continued to trickle in, the Indian musicians began to tune up and readied themselves to play. They expected over three hundred people to attend. The grown-ups, just as with their kids, however, operated on IST. Because of this, when the first steady dhol drum beats began, only half of the guests had arrived.

The music became louder and the garba started. As was tradition, Amit and Sonia started the first circle of folk dancing. After only a quarter of a round had been made a good forty ladies joined in the procession as three independent concentric circles revolved at different speeds in alternating directions. The men generally did not involve themselves in the garba, being content to stand, arms folded, along the periphery talking to the other men and watching the women dance.

After a few rounds had been completed, Vijay joined Amit in the innermost garba circle in a show of male solidarity. His five minutes of practice benefited him greatly as he didn’t bring his circle to a crashing halt. In fact, he found himself enjoying the rotating dancing around the room. It gave him an opportunity to check out all the women that were in attendance, as each one of them flashed by as if they were on a conveyor belt for his inspection.

After over an hour of dancing, the music, having reaching a fevered pitch, suddenly stopped, leaving everyone breathless from the exerted activity. As Vijay and Amit walked off the floor, Vijay felt an urgent tug on his arm. He turned around and was face to face with Anjali. Anjali was Amit’s eldest sister by three years. Her features were dramatically different than Amit’s, she was much heavier after having given birth to two kids.

“Vijay, come on! We need to go backstage and get ready for the performance! We’ve been looking for you for the last half hour!” Anjali said frantically while pulling Vijay towards the back of the auditorium. She turned around and said with the force of a movie director with a production to complete, “Amit, stop hanging out with Vijay and go over to your wife-to-be! You have to go sit over there! Move!” she pointed to two chairs that had been set out in the middle of the auditorium.

“We still have time to have a quick rehearsal with the others while the other performances take place.” Evidently their production was next to last on the list of performances. “Come on, follow me quickly!” She led Vijay to the backstage area where Anita, Amit’s other sister, who although two years younger than Anjali, could have passed as her skinnier twin, was playing tapes of Hindi music and coaching a group of other people in hurried fashion.

During many garba and raas programs a tribute was often held for the benefit of the groom and bride. At this time, close friends and family members performed, gave speeches, sang, or danced. Because Vijay had become good friends with Amit and because he had attended a number of Amit’s family parties, he had also become friends with Amit’s sisters. So when they were planning a performance, they had insisted that Vijay participate in their production.

“What can I do? I don’t know how to dance, and believe me, you don’t want to hear me sing!” Vijay had protested to Anjali and Anita when they had first asked for his participation.

“Don’t worry! You won’t have to do anything complicated. You just need to lip sync a few lines from a popular Hindi film song as a part of a skit with others,” they had replied, trying to secure the bodies necessary to have the performance.

Vijay wasn’t exactly thrilled with the idea but finally consented because he knew how much Amit would appreciate it. In fact, he had kept the two lines he was supposed to lip sync on a scrap of paper in his wallet and had forgotten completely about his promise to perform. He now found himself backstage with the others in the skit trying to get his part down.

The rehearsal didn’t give Vijay much confidence in the group’s talents, especially as each of them jokingly told the others that it was more the thought and effort that mattered than the actual performance. These were surely words to indicate that the performance would be comedic, whether that was the intent or not.

“Hey Anjali. It might help me if you actually told me what my lines mean,” Vijay said as he went over his role in the skit with the person performing immediately before him.

Anjali came over. “Oh that’s right, you don’t understand Hindi. Well you know that this performance is the story of Amit and Sonia and how they meet and get married. It starts with Amit dating a bunch of women and it never working out. Then, when Amit feels that there’s no hope of ever finding the right person, he meets Sonia, they fall in love, and they get married. It’s all based on clips of popular songs from Hindi movies.”

“And where does my line fit into this fun little story?” Vijay asked with a roll of his eyes.

“Your line comes at the point when Amit has met a bunch of women who don’t work out and he feels like he’ll never find the right person. Literally, your main line is pyar har kisi ko nahin milta which translated, means ‘Not everyone is meant to find love.’ So just try to act really sad and melodramatic when it’s your turn,” she said hurriedly, leaving him to address some other lip sync emergency.

As Vijay sat trying unsuccessfully to rehearse his line, a feeling of sadness and despair filled him. How appropriate, he thought to himself. His line was about as accurate a reflection of what his life was all about as any. As friend after friend had paired off and gotten married, Vijay had in the back of his mind wondered who he would be ending up with. He never had an answer to that question. Now, with these lines on paper in front of him, he began to think that maybe the sad truth was that this was some cosmic way of letting him know that he wasn’t meant to find love. He stared at the words written on the torn piece of paper. Feeling sad and for the first time, lonely, he went on stage and lip-synced his lines almost too perfectly.

After their performance had come to its end, the raas program started, which Vijay had once described to his American friends as rhythmic square dancing with decorated sticks. Unlike the garba, the men generally joined in this part of the program to do raas. Vijay had once surmised that the sticks gave the dancing a masculine enough quality for them to participate. After two hours of Indian doe-see-doeing, the guests had all left, realizing that they all would have to come back for the wedding early the next day.

“Hey Vijay!” Amit let out, laughing. “You really missed your calling by not going into show biz! That was a great performance on stage!”

“Thanks,” Vijay said with a weak smile.

“Can you do me a favor?” Amit asked. “Stick around for a second as back up. I’m nervous about meeting Sonia’s best friend from back east and I want to meet her with some friendly support from my camp.”

No sooner had Amit said that when Sonia excitedly called out his name from across the room. “Amit! Look, Rina just got here from the airport!” Sonia was hugging a woman as they were walking over to them. The woman next to her was a little taller than Sonia with long silky hair and strikingly beautiful eyes. Vijay looked at her, attracted to her immediately.

“Rina, I’ve heard so much about you, it’s nice to finally meet you,” Amit said politely when they were close enough to be properly introduced. “All Sonia would ever do is talk about you and how much she missed you since she’s come out to California.”

“I know. This last year was rough for both of us because we weren’t able to see each other as much. I’ve been busy with med school at Georgetown and have really missed her company,” she added with a playful sigh. “I’ve only been in the states for a few years and Sonia has been my best friend from day one. That’s why no matter what she has to say, it’s much tougher on me…she at least has you now.” As Rina finished her sentence she made quick eye contact with Vijay, who had up to now said nothing, standing discretely in the background.

Vijay’s bachelor senses seemed to have picked up a signal. He did the semantic analysis of her statement in a flash. Was this a coded message to let him know that she was not seeing anybody?

Amit continued talking to Rina, neglecting to introduce her to Vijay. After a few minutes, Vijay took matters into his own hands encouraged by his interpretation of Rina’s last sentence and the look she had given him. “Excuse me, Amit here was a little nervous about meeting you so he asked me to stick around to help make conversation. But after I agreed to help him out, he neglected to even introduce me.”

“Oh, Rina, this is my best man, Vijay.” Amit said apologetically.

Vijay took her outstretched hand with both of his. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

Rina’s eyes met Vijay’s again. Although it was only for a split second, it felt like a lifetime. Standing there, with her hand in both of his, Vijay felt as though he knew. It had happened. Love at first sight!

Unfortunately, those few seconds were all that they were afforded. Before Rina could even reply, Sonia’s mom called out from across the auditorium. “Sonia! Rina! Let’s go please! Tomorrow is a big day and you both need to get some rest.”

“Well, we better go,” said Sonia, reluctant to leave Amit.

“Yeah, I know how mom is, you better go,” said Amit, equally reluctant. Vijay was struck at how quickly Amit had transitioned from saying “your mom” to just “mom” when he referred to Sonia’s mother.

As they were walking away from Vijay and Amit, Vijay called out without thought, feeling as reluctant as the others about Sonia and Rina leaving, “I’ll see you at the wedding,” almost in a question-like fashion in their general direction.

“Of course silly! I’ll be at my own wedding!” laughed Sonia as they walked away.

But Vijay had directed his parting question to Rina, and somehow he knew that Rina was aware of this. It was almost as if he was saying to her when she turned to look over her shoulder in his direction, “I hope to get to know you more tomorrow.” Her look to him in return filled him with hope. She seemed to say with a slight smile that she was looking forward to their next meeting.

Amit then turned to Vijay, oblivious to any other conversations than the ones he had with Sonia, and said, “I think my day is just as important as Sonia’s so what do you say about our getting out of here?”

To that Vijay added “I agree. Tomorrow will be a big day. Maybe for both of us,” he ended the sentence with a hopeful sigh, based only on a smile and a look from Rina.

5

A Las Vegas Indian Wedding

Although Vijay lived close by, Amit asked him to stay over after the garba raas program and because Vijay was the best man, he readily agreed. Lying on a makeshift bed on the other side of Amit’s room, Vijay briefly processed the evening’s events with Amit in the darkness hoping that the topic of Rina would surface. It never happened because before either of them knew it, they had fallen asleep.

They both woke up before the alarm clock even sounded. “I can’t believe it! I’m getting married today!” said Amit, jumping out of bed and pacing back and forth in the room full of nervous energy.

In reality, Amit and Sonia had already “officially” been married a month earlier. The Indian pandit who would be performing the wedding ceremony later that day was not registered to sign the marriage license so they had gone to the courthouse to make it official. It had been a small nondescript ceremony in the judge’s chambers with only their parents present. Within five minutes and with little fanfare, uncharacteristic of what their Indian ceremony would be like, Amit and Sonia had become husband and wife.

Vijay kidded Amit about the civil ceremony, reminding him he had no reason to be nervous. “You know, I’ve decided if my Indian wedding doesn’t count and I have to go through some official ceremony, I wouldn’t do it the way you and Sonia did it.”

“Oh yeah, how would you do it differently?” asked Amit, sitting down on the carpeted floor to catch his breath.

“Well, first of all, I’d invite more people than just my parents!” Vijay started.

“You have to realize that when you go to the courthouse there isn’t a big room where all your guests can watch and cry,” Amit stated.

“In that case, why even hold it in a courthouse?” The seed of an idea slowly began to grow in Vijay’s mind. “In fact, I’d go to Vegas instead!” The most important thing he wanted for his wedding was for it to be fun. He couldn’t think of a better place to satisfy that requirement than to get married in one of those fast food like chapels with astroturf in the front and a drive-thru tunnel of love. Vijay swept his arms out like a visionary. “Your court ceremony was a total forgettable event! No offense,” Vijay said, looking at Amit, quickly reverting back to reality.

“None taken,” Amit said with a grin, knowing better than to try and derail Vijay’s enthusiastic train of thought.

“And this huge Indian ceremony,” Vijay continued, “is really just a bunch of your parents’ acquaintances.” The fact of the matter was that with almost a thousand guests attending, Rocky and Sonia were going to be busy taking pictures and saying their hellos to strangers rather than celebrating with their friends.

“That’s why the number one rule of my “official” wedding will be that it has to be fun! Especially for the bride and the groom!” declared Vijay.

“I think in your case the number one rule should be finding a woman willing to go through with it!” Amit retorted.

“Don’t hold me back!” exclaimed Vijay, not to be dissuaded. He went on to explain the rules—-No one over the age of thirty-five would be invited, the groom would have to wear a light blue polyester tuxedo with wide lapels, a ruffled shirt, and white patent leather shoes. The bride would have to be blond, either naturally or by wig, with a feather boa around her neck to match the groom’s tuxedo. “And of course, Elvis would be in the building!”

“Of course,” Amit laughed in agreement. “I have to admit, it certainly would be a memorable event! It’s still a wonder with your ideas that you’re not married yet, if not just for the excuse to go to Vegas!”

“Tell me about it!” answered Vijay with an exaggerated sigh, not understanding his failure to get married yet either.

6

Lost Shoes Blues

Later in the morning after the Griha Shanti, Ganesh Puja, and other religious ceremonies had been completed at home, all of the relatives, including Amit, were ready and the group left for the wedding hall, which was one of the ballrooms of a Doubletree Hotel in Long Beach. Vijay rode with Amit and his parents, followed by all of their relatives and family friends. Theirs was a comical procession of minivans, Toyota Camrys, and Honda Accords—all of which were the favored modes of transportation in the Indian community given their high sensibility ratio, which meant optimal functionality, reliability, and low price at the sacrifice of style, power, luxury and comfort.

Once Amit’s family and friends had arrived at the wedding hall, they all congregated a hundred yards from the front entrance as a part of the baraat, the groom’s procession to meet the bride. There was another group of Sonia’s family and friends at the door waiting to greet and welcome the baraat. It was a little comical, Vijay thought with a smile. It was like the Indian version of a fight scene from West Side Story with two rival gangs eyeing each other from across the way getting ready to rumble. However, instead of leather jackets and jeans, these people wore suits and saris.

A woman walked up to them with a white horse following obediently behind her. According to Indian custom, the groom was supposed to arrive on a white horse to his wedding. In most of the weddings that Vijay had attended in America, most families had opted for a white convertible instead. Amit’s parents, however, wanted his wedding to be special and had rented a horse for Amit to ride on even though he had never ridden one before in his life.

Once Amit was on the horse he was handed a decorated coconut, a symbol of purity and fertility, and then the baraat surrounded him and the procession began. At the front, Amit’s cousins and friends were singing and dancing with one cousin shouldering a heavy boom box that was playing lively wedding music. In India, while the women sang and danced, the men would set off firecrackers announcing the arrival of the groom. This, however, had proven to be disastrous at a wedding Vijay and Amit had attended earlier that year. Just like Amit, the groom at that wedding had arrived on a horse. However, when the firecrackers were set off, the horse panicked and reared up on its hind legs throwing the groom off into a puddle on the ground. The entire set of wedding pictures were choreographed thereafter to hide the large stains on the groom’s clothing without much success. Although not seriously hurt, it was an outcome more suitable for a video bloopers show rather than a wedding.

At the front entrance it took Vijay and several others to help Amit off the horse. Following both sets of parents and with Vijay at his side, Amit then entered into the wedding hall led by a videographer, who walked backwards and slightly ahead of him to capture every step he took. Amit walked up to the mandap, a red, white, and gold decorated gazebo-like structure adorned with long strings of orange carnations tied to the top and hanging down like a floral curtain. The mandap was located in the middle of the ballroom with chairs for the guests all around. Inside the mandap, where the actual wedding ceremony would take place, the pandit sat on the floor in the middle with two large chairs facing opposite each other and a small makeshift hibachi from which the holy flames for the phera ceremony would be lit. It was around this that the bride and the groom would make the rounds of Dharma, Kam, Aarth, and Moksh, each round representing the vows of religion, love, wealth, and salvation respectively. Two beautifully ornate floor pillows were placed inside the mandap on which only Sonia’s parents sat down because the initial ceremonies would reflect that they were giving away their daughter.

As soon as Amit approached the mandap, he took his shoes off. Vijay immediately took custody of them, and then handed them to Rocky, who had been standing nearby. Rocky would be responsible for guarding Amit’s shoes.

As Amit’s best man, Vijay had come to learn that as elaborate and formal as Indian weddings were, much of it was really just playing games. Vijay’s duty was to make sure that Amit’s side did not lose to Sonia’s side and one of the games had already begun. It was the goal of Sonia’s side to steal Amit’s shoes while he sat in the mandap during the wedding. The significance for doing so was never explained to Vijay and he never questioned it. All he knew was that if the girl’s side succeeded, they could hold them for ransom because Amit was not allowed to leave unless he put them back on.

“Rocky, guard these with your life,” Vijay said as he handed him Amit’s shoes. “I don’t care how many family members they throw your way. Do you have some help?”

“Oh yeah, don’t worry about it!” Rocky assured Vijay. “The guys will stick with me. No matter how large a group they send at us, we aren’t going to lose!” Vijay felt confident as Rocky himself was a formidable foe, having played football in high school and rugby in college. “And Swati and Nina volunteered,” he pointed to them, “in case there are female weapons that they throw our way.”

“Nina and I will make sure that none of the women use their charms on the guys and steal the shoes away,” Swati promised with a grin.

“All right. Bring them back after the wedding is finished,” Vijay instructed them.

They walked away with a ring of bodyguards around them. The crown jewels couldn’t have been guarded more closely.

Once Amit entered the mandap, he sat down in one of the chairs, Vijay sat down in a chair beside and slightly behind him to Amit’s right, and the wedding began. The pandit began to perform the ceremonies in Gujarati. Because Amit had no idea what was being said, at the end of every sentence the pandit would instruct him in English what to do. From time to time, Vijay assisted Amit by holding various items while the ceremonies were being conducted. For the first half hour of the ceremony the seat opposite of Amit, the seat meant for Sonia, remained unoccupied because it was not yet time for the bride to arrive. After a number of the initial ceremonies had been concluded, two of Sonia’s cousins came into the mandap and raised a long silk sheet up. The sheet was held in the middle of the mandap and was used to prevent Amit from looking across at the chair in which Sonia would soon be sitting. Although they could see nothing, a stir in the crowd let them know that Sonia had entered into the room.

“Make sure you look closely at the face when this sheet comes down,” Vijay whispered to Amit. “We want to make sure that they don’t pull a switch on you!”

“If someone really scary is in the chair instead of Sonia, it’s your duty to step in and take the bullet for me,” Amit joked back.

“Stop goofing off back there!” a soft voice called out from across the sheet. “Don’t you realize that there’s a wedding going on!” It was Sonia. She evidently must have arrived at her chair on the other side while Vijay and Amit were talking.

A strange voice then laughingly floated over the sheet. “Sonia, I’m confused. Now tell me again. Did you say that Amit’s friend Vijay was funny, or funny looking?”

“Watch out!” Amit laughed at Vijay, “It sounds like my wife to be has brought in reinforcements!” Rina, Sonia’s maid of honor, was also sitting in the mandap in a supporting role similar to the one Vijay was playing for Amit.

Their conversation was cut short by a rise in volume from the pandit as he tirelessly performed ceremonies unknown to the bride and groom. Evidently, the sheet separating them would be lowered soon.

Vijay gave Amit a reassuring nod, and slowly the sheet held between Amit and Sonia dropped.

For the first time that day, Amit saw Sonia. She looked regal. As ornate as was the outfit that Amit had on, it paled in comparison to the wedding sari that Sonia was wearing. Vijay had just attended an American ceremony for one of his college friends, and the bride had worn a beautiful yet simple white gown. Sonia’s crimson and white wedding sari, which colors represented fertility and purity, was the exact opposite. It was overlaid with gold embroidery in such an elaborate manner, that the crimson silk cloth which was the canvas for the designs could hardly be seen. At first, Vijay hadn’t believed Sonia when she had said that her wedding sari weighed over thirty pounds. But now, looking at it up close, he could understand how all the gold and other work stitched on made it very beautiful but also very heavy to walk around in.

In addition to her wedding sari, she also had beautiful tiny designs drawn on the brow of her face and even more intricate mehndi designs on her feet and on both sides of her hands. It was said that the darker the color of the mehndi, the stronger the love that would exist between the married couple. Based on the crimson shade that had dried onto Sonia’s hand after the mehndi party earlier that week, it seemed without a doubt that their love would last a lifetime. In addition to its dark color on Sonia, the mehndi was also drawn elaborately, with curly ques, flowers, and geometric shapes taking up every open space. Interspersed and hidden among the designs on Sonia’s palm were the letters to Amit’s name. A friend had once told Vijay that this was often done in India because when the shy bride and nervous groom had time alone after the wedding, the groom could, under the pretense of trying to find the letters to his name, innocently hold his bride’s hands in his hands for what was often the first time, given the traditionally conservative and short courtship periods.

Amit would later tell Vijay that he had never been more in love with Sonia than he was at that precise moment on their wedding day. As the sheet dropped in the mandap, however, Vijay too, experienced something incredible. He had wanted to see the face of the second voice, and as the sheet came down, he did, with his eyes resting on Rina. Just as the day before, they exchanged looks only for a second. After catching glimpses of each other, they quickly averted their eyes in embarrassment. Vijay would later recall that whenever Amit would describe the feeling that he had felt when he first saw Sonia in the mandap, that it struck him that he had felt the same emotions when he had gazed across into Rina’s eyes.

The ceremony concluded two hours, four rounds around the fire, and three resulting false fire alarms later. Vijay kept glancing over at Rina more regularly, disregarding his role as best man. Rina too, seemed to be doing the same. Perhaps the emotions of the wedding had taken hold of them.

The polite clapping by those in the seats around them awoke Vijay from his love struck stupor. The wedding ceremony had just finished and Amit and Sonia were officially, well, in the eyes of the Hindu gods and the Indian community, married.

Everyone in the mandap rose from their places. Vijay looked around. “Let me find Rocky,” he said to Amit, “and I’ll bring you your shoes. I’m very disappointed in you Sonia,” he said taunting as he rose from his seat. “I would have thought your side would have made more of an effort to get Amit’s shoes.” Vijay had expected a tussle as often had happened in past weddings when the initial transfer of shoes had been completed. “But then again, I guess we always knew that it’s the guy’s side that’s superior!”

At that moment Rocky came up to the mandap motioning that he wanted to urgently speak with Vijay.

As Vijay approached him, he sensed something had gone awry. “Do you have Amit’s shoes with you?”

Rocky just shook his head.

“What! Did they send a lot of guys after you? How could you lose them!” Vijay exclaimed agitated.

“I didn’t lose the shoes, I lost Nina and Swati! We were all in a safe room in the back and there were some boxes that Swati said the family needed to be moved for the reception. I looked around to make sure none of Sonia’s family was around, and gave the shoes to Nina to hold while the guys and I quickly did the work. As soon as I went to the boxes, I turned around to ask them where we should move them, and the girls were gone! I wonder if Sonia’s cousins are chasing them somewhere trying to get the shoes back!” Rocky said worriedly.

Just as Rocky finished his sentence Swati’s voice called out loudly from behind Sonia, “You know those guys from the groom’s side. They may be big and strong, but they sure aren’t very smart!”

Sonia was laughing as Nina picked up from where Swati had left off. “We wouldn’t want your honeymoon to be ruined because Amit couldn’t leave without his shoes, so we’ll be happy to give them back…”

“For the right price!” Swati finished with a mischievous tone. At that moment Swati raised her arms with each hand holding onto a shoe. Evidently, the girls had become double agents, pretending to be on Amit’s side when they really were doing shoe service for Sonia’s side.

All of the people from Sonia’s family began cheering and whooping while Amit looked at Vijay, Vijay looked at Rocky, and Rocky just looked embarrassed.

7

A Proposal for a Proposal

Vijay hurriedly drove to his parent’s house to change his clothes for the evening wedding reception. His one of a kind custom tailored wedding clothes, brought for him by his mother when she last went to India, would be replaced by a standard black tuxedo that he and twelve other friends and relatives would be wearing to coordinate with Amit.

Shantiben came out to greet him when he walked through the door, her eyes lighting up with delight seeing her son in the Indian clothes he had worn at Amit’s wedding. The only thing that would have been better for her was if he were dressed for his own ceremony as opposed to his friend’s wedding. “Hello, did everything go good?” she asked.

“It was fun,” Vijay answered quickly as he rushed up the stairs two at a time. After participating in the negotiations for Amit’s shoes and the necessary photographs taken after the ceremony, he only had enough time for a quick shower and change before he would have to go back to the reception.

“Remember!” she called, trying to catch his attention before he made it past the upstairs hallway, “You are to be coming back at home tonight to be meeting our relatives tomorrow. They are to be coming for lunch so please to not making any plans, okay?” she requested, looking up the stairs at Vijay.

“I’m all yours tomorrow!” Vijay promised, as he headed to the bathroom near his bedroom. After showering, Vijay put on his tuxedo and rushed down the stairs only to run into his parents in the family room eagerly waiting for him.

“Hey! Look at Mr. Shahrukh Khan!” his father pointed in his direction comparing him to the hottest Indian movie star of the time. “We need to take a picture of Vijay, quick! Not only is he home, but he actually looks good too!” He joked to Shantiben.

“I gotta go, can we do this some other time?” Vijay said looking at his watch impatiently. As the best man, he felt an obligation to get to the reception before the bride and groom arrived and he was already in jeopardy of not meeting this deadline. More importantly, however, he wanted to see Rina again and explore the strangely wonderful feelings that had been awoken in him.

However, there was no dissuading them, as they kept insisting on taking just a few quick pictures. His father quickly went searching for the camera in one of the drawers behind the wet bar that had never served a drink with alcohol since Vijay could remember. After finding the camera, he directed Vijay to stand in a corner and pose.

Vijay, in a clowning mood, decided to be difficult. He gave them a number of side poses, trying to look like he was James Bond. For some reason, his parents didn’t find it very amusing. Unfortunately for them, there were only three exposures remaining on the film when they had started. Before his parents could even substitute a new roll of film in the camera, Vijay was out of the door racing in his car towards the reception.

The reception was an elegant affair at the same hotel. More guests were expected at the wedding reception in comparison to the wedding for the sole reason that Indian weddings tended to be long and boring while it was at the reception where there would be food, alcohol, dancing and action. Guys told other guys on the way to Indian wedding receptions that “it’ll be a great way to meet women!” while women told other women that “it’ll be a great way to see what other women are wearing!”

As soon as Vijay arrived, he ran into one of Amit’s uncles who told him that Amit was looking for him. Vijay threaded through the crowd until he reached the outside hallway where he found Amit and Sonia together with a crowd of other relatives and friends.

Upon seeing Vijay enter into the hallway, Amit approached him anxiously, “There you are! We were waiting for you so that we could start the introductions!”

“Sorry. I got caught up with the parents,” Vijay apologized, explaining to him that even he wasn’t immune from having to take pictures.

At that moment someone came up and told them to get ready because they were going to announce the wedding party and the newlyweds. This caused a panicked stir among the group in the hallway as everyone tried to figure out who should be walking out with whom. The deejay assisted in this process by announcing over a microphone the entrance of certain people from the wedding party, which resulted in a scramble to find the people announced so that they could be pushed through the doors into the main room. Before Vijay even realized what was happening, the deejay then announced the best man and the maid of honor.

It was then that Vijay first noticed Rina was also standing in the hallway. She had been speaking to Sonia’s parents, blocked from his view. She wore a midnight blue satin length skirt lengha and a matching half-sleeve velvet blouse. The lengha had sparkling yet subtle silver embroidery in floral print with a net-like silver crepe chunni draped from her right shoulder to her left hip. Her hair was up showing off an exquisite necklace consisting of a chain of square cut diamonds interspersed with blue sapphires and a pair of diamond hoop bali earrings hung from her ears perfectly matching her ensemble. After the deejay’s announcement, she and Vijay were pushed together by the front door for their entrance. Vijay instinctively offered his left hand to her. Meeting his hand with a smile, Rina put her hand in his. It felt surprisingly familiar and overwhelmingly perfect.

“Shall we?” Vijay asked her. The bedlam in the hallway and the clapping in the room were sounds that he had silenced in his mind so that he could focus on her answer.

“I’d love to” she replied back with a shy smile. After countless embarrassed and furtive glances and coded sentences that weekend, hand in hand, they had finally arrived.

They spent the entire evening together getting to know each other. Rina seemed so perfect to Vijay, and the feeling appeared to be mutual. She held on to every word that Vijay said, and the attraction on her part became more evident.

As they learned more about each other that evening, the distance between them kept being shortened until, although not touching, they were within intimate proximity of each other. It felt comfortable yet exhilarating. It had not been a feeling that Vijay had felt in a long time, nor was it a feeling that he thought he would ever feel again since he had broken up with Jennifer. But here it was again, and if anything, even better. While it had taken Jennifer and him months to slowly find that they were mutually attracted to each other, he had amazingly felt it instantly and more powerfully with Rina.

Later in the evening after dinner, the deejay announced the first dance and Vijay and Rina rose from their table along with all of the guests to move to the dance floor. As the music started to play, Amit walked, with Sonia by the hand, to the middle of the dance floor and started their first dance together as a married couple.

Halfway through the song Amit’s parents and Sonia’s parents awkwardly joined them on the dance floor, embarrassed at having to show such a public display of emotion, but nonetheless laughingly urged out by their children and other relatives. As the song continued, Vijay looked at the ring of people around the dance floor and the happy couples dancing. And then his eyes rested on Rina standing by his side.

She must have felt his gaze, for her eyes looked up to meet his. Together, they walked onto the dance floor to join the family members. Vijay’s days of standing along on the side of the dance floor while watching the happiness of other couples on the floor were finished. He had met someone special now to share in the dance.

In a fluid, almost practiced like symphony of movements, she put one of her hands into his, he ran his right arm around her waist, and she rested her head on his shoulder. They swayed to the sounds of music. She felt so perfectly right in his arms. With a spark of an idea coming to mind, Vijay shifted his head a little to the right and whispered into her ear without thinking twice, “Will you marry me?”

Her reaction was both startled and disbelieving. Those are not words a woman hears often. “Excuse me? Did I hear you right?” she asked lifting her head up from his shoulder to look into his eyes.

He looked back at her and said with a sincere smile, “I can’t explain it, but something amazing seems to have happened to me when I saw you, and I think you feel something too. Sure, it’s only been a few hours, but think about it! It would make for such a great story!”

“How so?” she asked, still trying to figure out from where Vijay was coming.

“Look, if for some reason things don’t work out, this would all be our private little joke! But if it did work out, and the more I’m with you the more I think that could happen, we could say that we knew we were going to be married from the first moment we met! We could honestly say that it was love at first sight!” His discussions with Amit on this subject and the benefits of falling in love over time were washed away by his attraction to Rina.

She shook her head and laughed not believing the strange rationale Vijay had concocted to propose to her. “Here I’ve been complaining about people who go to India to get married within a matter of weeks and you want me to decide in a matter of hours?”

Vijay just looked at her and nodded, almost as if hoping that the more the idea sunk in, the more reasonable it would seem.

“I don’t know what kind of girl you think I am,” she said in a teasing tone, “but I’m certainly not the kind of girl that accepts a marriage proposal the first time she sees a guy! I don’t even really know you, or your family, or anything!”

“Is any of that important?” Vijay asked dramatically. “Isn’t love all that matters?”

Rina looked into his eyes for a moment, evaluating the merits behind Vijay’s short, simple, yet audacious idea. Her gaze then softened as her feelings of attraction were as strong as her belief in the craziness of his scheme. “I never said that I was the kind of girl that wouldn’t consider the question on a second date though,” she responded coyly, wanting to at least keep the vestige of being hard to get.

Vijay’s hopes soared. The first song had long since ended replaced by a much faster dance song. They hadn’t noticed, continuing to dance at the same, slow, intimate pace. “Can we go out on a date tomorrow?” Vijay asked her immediately.

“Tomorrow will be here in about three minutes so I don’t think I could say I waited a day before answering. But Monday night looks good, and I’ll still be in town,” she said with an inviting smile.

And with that, the rest of the evening passed by in a blur. As Vijay waited by the curb while the parking attendant brought his car around, he took out his wallet so that he could give a tip. Next to one of the dollar bills in his wallet he saw the torn out sheet with his two lines from the skit—his cosmic message that he wasn’t meant to find love and that he was destined to stand alone on the side of life’s dance floor. He deliberately took the sheet of paper out, ripped it up, and let it scatter into the wind, as a defiant statement to the world that he, in fact, had actually just discovered love.

8

Einstein’s Theory of Indian Relativity

Vijay returned to his parents’ home at 3:00 a.m. and quietly stole in. He slowly walked up the stairs, feeling for the steps from memory, not wanting to turn on the lights and awaken anyone. Reaching his room, he collapsed onto his bed from exhaustion. Although incredibly tired, he could not bring himself to sleep. He just lay in bed reliving the evening’s events.

He had fallen in love with Rina and kept closing his eyes with a smile as he imagined her over and over again. If someone were to have asked him to describe the woman who had put the smile on his face, he would have been unable to conjure up specific adjectives. However, when he closed his eyes, she came back to him as if she were standing there, intimately close, beside him again. It was like any song he had heard on the radio. If asked to sing the lyrics, he could never get past the third word, but when he closed his eyes and played it in his mind, he could hear every word and instrument as if the song were emanating directly from the radio once more.

He awoke with a start in the morning at the sound of the front door opening downstairs. Vijay closed his eyes again when he realized that it was his father retrieving the morning newspaper. He smiled as the memory and magic of last night came back to him. He slowly woke up, took a shower, got ready, and then headed down the stairs to join his parents.

“Morning,” Vijay announced his presence as he walked into the bonus room. His father was busy reading the front page and his mother was clipping coupons. “What’s the plan for today?” he asked his mother as he stole the sports section away from his father before he had even had a chance to read it.

“Your Ghopal uncle and his daughter Shinki are coming over for visit today,” she replied. “Since you have never been meeting them, you should be staying to say hello.”

“Shinki? What kind of goofy name is that? Is it a guy’s name or girl’s name?” asked Vijay laughing. He could just imagine a childhood filled with kids continuously calling his cousin “Stinky” just to be mean.

Shantiben complained hearing Vijay’s comment, “Shinki is girl. You know papa’s family when they are naming the kids.” Indian custom gave the father’s sister the right to name their nieces and nephews. The only restriction being that the name had to start with a certain letter determined by a pandit after consulting with certain astrological texts. Whether the name could emotionally scar the child in life evidently was not often factored into the selection of the name.

Vijay, too, had been a victim of the process because his Premlata foi, his father’s only sister, had been given naming rights. She had named him Veeral. After the first three months, however, his parents had grown weary of half their American neighbors asking if he was contagious, thinking his name was “Viral”, while the other half of their American neighbors asked if he would be subjected to unrealistic sexual expectations, thinking his name was “Virile”. Because Vijay’s middle name was his father’s name, one of their family friends would always refer to him as V. Jay. Through time the name stuck until it was regularly spelled and pronounced Vijay.

“So how come I haven’t met this Ghopal uncle and Shinki before?” asked Vijay.

“Because he has been in Singapore for more than ten years working there and Shinki only came few years ago to do her studies on east coast.” she explained. “Shinki is younger so please to be making friends with her so that she will come here more often for visits.”

Their conversation was cut short because Rohit and Vaishali had arrived. Rohit appeared in the hallway in khaki slacks and a starched white shirt. Exactly two steps behind him followed Vaishali dressed in a simple pastel colored sari. When she saw their mother she bowed her head slightly and said “Hello mummi.” She looked around the room and added “Khem cho papa, Vijay.”

“Hi Vaishali, hey Rohit!” Vijay greeted them in casual American fashion in direct contrast to Vaishali’s more formal greeting. Vaishali immediately joined Shantiben as they walked into the kitchen to go over the lunch menu while Jayendrabhai rose to go upstairs to get ready for the arrival of their guests.

“How are you Veeral?” asked Rohit as he sat down near the stack of newspapers by Vijay in the bonus room. He called him Veeral, not because that was one of the annoying things that an older brother did to a younger brother, but rather because he was traditional and never understood why their parents had changed his younger brother’s name to simply accommodate the neighbors.

“I’m doing all right,” he answered. “How’s married life?”

“Great! When can I ask the same thing from you?” His parents had subcontracted to Rohit all matters related to imploring Vijay to get married.

Normally, Vijay would have pushed his request for information and answers aside. But the excitement of meeting Rina last night had left him with a desire to share his feelings with someone, even if it had to be Rohit. He leaned over to him, and quietly said “Don’t say anything to anyone, but I think I may have finally found her.”

This caught Rohit’s attention as the her no doubt referred to a woman that Vijay could see marrying. With a slight rise in his voice he asked, “Is she Indian?” Vijay nodded and Rohit released a breath of anxiety at the answer. He never did quite understand Vijay’s interest in Jennifer.

“Her name is Rina. She’s smart, funny, and unbelievably beautiful!” Vijay described her using broad strokes.

Rohit couldn’t be bothered with the big picture, interested more in the minutiae that was important to him and his parents. “Is she Gujarati?”

“I’m pretty sure she is,” responded Vijay with an indifferent shrug of his shoulders.

Rohit’s eyes lit up with even more excitement. Their parents would be so happy! “What gaam is she from?” he continued the questioning.

“You know, I think that topic came up while we were slow dancing,” said Vijay sarcastically. “When I asked her, she said Juicy Fruit.”

“No, I don’t mean gum, I mean gaam.” The joke had been wasted on Rohit. “You know. What village does she come from in Gujarat?” Vijay just shrugged his shoulders again, unable to give an answer. Undaunted at the lack of information, Rohit continued his due diligence. “What about her family? Do you know anything about them? Did you ask Amit’s parents if they knew them? If not, maybe mom and dad can find out about her family.” He was like a teenager driving a car for the first time, picking up speed as each question came out.

“It’s like I’ve always told you, what her parents do, the village she comes from and all that other stuff doesn’t matter to me. I just know that I really like her, and that doesn’t happen often. So when it does, I’m not going to let these outdated Indian cultural things get in my way,” said Vijay emphatically.

Rohit was about to mount his counter offensive to Vijay’s argument, but before he could start, the front doorbell rang.

“Saved by the bell,” sighed Vijay, who had heard too many lectures from his parents and other relatives. He should have known that he would hear it again from his brother once he opened up the subject.

Their guests had evidently arrived and their parents could already be heard chatting away. Vijay and Rohit walked towards the living room. As Vijay walked through the entryway, however, he stopped short. He looked past his uncle and his parents and rested his eyes on his cousin

from back east. At the same moment, she raised her eyes to meet his. “Shinki?” he addressed her in dumbfounded fashion. “Veeral?” she replied back in equal disbelief looking at Vijay. Sitting in his parents’ living room was his cousin Shinki. Vijay,

however, had already met her as Rina, the name her parents and friends had started calling her since the age of two, the woman he had just proposed to the night before.

9

Gentlemen, Start Your Mothers!

Vijay stood by the upstairs window, looking glum as Rina and Ghopal uncle drove away. There would be no second date. This was not to say that Vijay would never see her again. It’s just that it would no longer would be considered a “date” but rather a “family reunion.”

It was the end of the day and Rohit was slowly rocking the swing in the back yard reading an India Abroad newspaper. He looked up over the paper and seeing Vijay come through the back screen door, motioned for him to join him. Rohit had already figured out that their cousin Shinki was, by some strange circumstance, the woman Vijay had been describing to him as his new love interest that morning.

“How are you doing?” Rohit asked sympathetically.

“Let’s just say this wasn’t one of my better days,” sighed Vijay. He pulled out the section of the paper with the matrimonial listings and opened it up. “I think I’d have better luck if I just responded to some of these ads. See, here’s a good one,” he pointed at one. The advertisement invited alliances for an extremely beautiful Sindhi girl with a physician father, innocent divorce, and no issues. Evidently, caste was no bar and the only requirements were that the suitor speak English, have a college or better education, and be a green card holder or U.S. citizen.

“No, this is not a good one,” Rohit disapproved of the advertisement Vijay had pointed to. “She’s not even Gujarati!”

“So, what’s the big deal?” Vijay asked, indifferent. “In the end, we’re all Indian, right?”

Rohit put the paper down in anticipation of providing a lengthy explanation. Fortunately, Rohit did not go so far back as to start with maharajas, kingdoms and British rule, but instead began with the basic premise that each region in India was remarkably different from the other regions in India. “Just because we’re all Indian doesn’t mean we’re all carbon copy alike. If, for example, you’re from Tamil-Nadu, Rajastan, or Punjab, you have differences in languages, customs, foods and sometimes even religion from the people of Gujarat. It can get to a point when you might as well marry an American because they’re no more different than Indians from other regions. That is why you want commonality.”

Vijay actually understood the premise behind the argument, having heard it before from his parents. How marrying someone who was Indian and Gujarati made it much more likely that there would be more similarity in beliefs and culture and therefore fewer disagreements and greater harmony down the road of marriage. What he did not understand, however, were the specifics. At what level did the differences start to become significant? “Tell me something,” he asked Rohit naively. “What does all this gaam stuff you keep mentioning have to do with anything? If someone is from a different gaam, is that like marrying someone from a different region?”

“No, that’s not it exactly. Knowing which gaam you’re from is Gujarati specific and was traditionally more of a social status kind of thing about the village you were from. It is like the Beverly Hills 90201 zip code mentality,” Rocky was trying very hard to break down complex Gujarati sociological concepts into bite sized pieces for Vijay. “Of course, with everyone moving around now it’s not nearly as important.”

“Then why were you and mom and dad asking about it all the time when you got married?” Vijay asked, curious.

Rohit gave the swing a kick as he tried to figure out how to translate the answer into English. “You know how both mom and dad have the same last name, right?” he started.

Vijay nodded, recalling how when he was young all his friends freaked out when they found out that his parents had Patel as their same last name even before they had gotten married. The running joke he heard growing up was whether, if his parents got divorced, they would still be considered brother and sister.

“And you know how every time one of our non-Indian friends has met someone named Patel, they always think that they’re related to us?” Rohit continued.

Vijay nodded again. “Yeah, I always have to tell them that it’s just a very common Gujarati name, like Smith or Lee.”

“Well, because there are so many people in Gujarat with Patel as their last name, one basic way to help make sure you’re not marrying someone you’re related to is by marrying someone who’s not from your specific gaam,” explained Rohit.

“Let me guess,” Vijay said with a sigh, as the importance of this information dawned on him, “Rina is from our gaam, isn’t she?”

“Yes, probably,” Rohit said with a shrug.

At that moment Shantiben walked outside to join them. “What are you two boys talking about?” she asked approaching.

“Oh, Rohit was helping me find the perfect Gujarati wife. You know how he is. So picky, even when it comes to the person that I’m supposed to marry,” Vijay joked weakly. Rohit moved off the swing to make room for their mother, leaving them to find Vaishali.

“So,” she said, putting her hands together expectantly, looking up at him after joining him on the swing like a child expecting some surprise. “With all this talk, is there someone that we should be knowing about? Have you found some Gujarati girl?” she emphasized the Gujarati part hoping somehow by doing so that it increased the chances of Vijay answering in the affirmative.

Vijay let out a sigh and shrugged his shoulders. “No. Not anyone that I really like. Not yet.”

“Vijay!” she responded as would a child not getting the surprise that was expected. She then continued in more aggressive fashion feeling that her window of matrimonial opportunity with him that had temporarily opened might be closed unless she moved quickly, “You are not getting any younger now! We should start looking seriously if you are having interest and haven’t met anybody,” Shantiben marched through rapidly, like an infantryman trying to capture as much marital territory now that the first line of defense had temporarily been broken down.

“Don’t start!” Vijay shook his head stubbornly, setting up new bunkers. “I’m not like Rohit! There’s no way that I’m going off to India to find my wife in a week before I supposedly get too old!”

She took in his answer, blinked, paused for a moment, and then laughed. “Beta, I know you’re not like Rohit. You two boys could not be more different! Believe me, I am knowing this,” she said while rubbing her forehead, as if the headaches that had come from their fighting while growing up as children had resurfaced. “Just like Rohit wanted to go to India for his traditional wife, I am also knowing you want an Indian wife who is westernized, from Amrika.”

Vijay said with a sigh, “I just want to find a nice girl who can make me happy.”

“If that is what you are wanting, you must begin looking seriously. The longer you are waiting, the fewer girls there will be left,” she said, shaking her finger at him as if that would drive the point further home.

Vijay thought for a minute and realized what his mother was saying did make a lot of sense. His going to weddings and finding fewer and fewer single Indian friends had worried him.

There was silence and the swing had come to a rest, twitching slightly in response to their slightest movements. “I don’t know what I can do,” he said quietly after some silence. “Even though I haven’t really been thinking about getting married, I’ve still been looking. But there’s no one that I like.”

“Papa and I can be helping,” she, too, responded softly now, realizing victory was close at hand if she played her cards right. “But you have to decide if you are being ready about marriage. That’s what looking seriously means. If good girl comes, you are being ready to marry,” she repeated to drive the point home.

Vijay gave the ground a kick, starting the swing in motion again. There was silence all around them except for the slight clicking noise the chains supporting the swing made as they shifted to and fro. Vijay felt lonely; he had been feeling that way for some time now. He realized that these feelings might be an indication that he was ready to get married. He did want someone to share his life with. Yes, Vijay thought to himself, if he found the right woman, he could see himself married. But finding that right woman—that was the hard part.

He let out a sigh, looked over to his mother, and said, “So, do you think you can help me find someone?”

And so it all began.

MAKING ARRANGEMENTS

1

Looking for Ms. Perfect

“If you want us to help you find a wife, there are some things you have to do to help us,” his father requested from Vijay at the dinner table a week after he had agreed to allow his parents to help him in the search for a wife. Vijay had spent the whole week thinking over the idea and could see no downside to it. “First, you need to describe to us what you are looking for.”

Vijay took a moment to respond, remembering when Amit had asked him the very same question during Amit’s wedding. “I don’t need the perfect person. Just the perfect person for me,” he offered what he thought was a clever answer to the question.

His parents, however, were not very impressed. “Please to be helping us out more,” Shantiben implored him, “We need to be knowing what you want so that we show you girls that you will be liking.”

“But mom,” he said exasperated, “If I even don’t know who I’m looking for how can I tell you?”

“Let’s do this differently,” Jayendrabhai interrupted with a calm voice. Based on years of working as an engineer, he applied a methodical approach to get the answers he needed. “We understand you cannot exactly describe the girl to us. But even still, there must be some limits. Tell me,” he picked an easy first category, “How short can she be? Would it be all right if the girl was less than five feet tall?”

Vijay, who himself stood five feet ten inches tall, didn’t want someone too short. He answered immediately, “She has to at least be five feet tall or she’ll look like my daughter!”

“I agree, now we are starting somewhere,” said Jayendrabhai. He motioned to Shantiben who wrote this fact down. Evidently it would be her job to record all of the characteristics Vijay was looking for as his father culled them out.

“How tall can she be?” Jayendrabhai wanted to close the loop on the other end.

Vijay again was able to respond. “I don’t want anyone taller than me.”

“And do not forget the high heels,” Shantiben chipped in, not to be left out of the loop.

“Ok,” said Vijay with a grin. “No one over five feet seven inches.” Not that this was a limiting factor. Most every Indian woman he knew was much shorter.

After several more questions, just as a victim described his assailant to a police sketch artist, Vijay began to describe his ideal wife to his parents. And although at first it did not seem possible to put down on paper the characteristics of this ideal woman, with the proper questioning, she began to take form.

“She has to be thin, correct?” Vijay’s father continued, asking the question leadingly.

“Slender. I don’t want anyone who’s heavier than me,” Vijay agreed. He always had assumed that all of the Indian women he would meet would be petite just like all his friends and he were. But, he thought to himself, it couldn’t hurt to put it down on paper just to be safe.

“Okay, how about education? I am assuming you want at least someone who has graduated from college, correct?” Jayendrabhai asked leadingly again.

Vijay agreed. “She would have to be smart and someone who I could talk to for hours. You know what I mean.”

“College educated, minimum,” said his father dryly, not caring to know what Vijay meant. “I’m telling you, nowadays it takes two incomes for you to make it. Let’s try to find you someone with a good job, maybe a pharmacist.”

Vijay didn’t want to narrow the search too much. “I just want someone who’s interesting. I don’t care what she does, whether she’s a doctor or an artist.” The mention of artist made Jayendrabhai cringe as he mentally calculated the second income that would come from such a wife.

After a few more questions and certain additional compromises between Vijay and his parents, it was over. It hadn’t seemed possible, but he had been able to provide his parents a rough sketch of who he was looking for. While the details of his dream woman were still very hazy—they seemed to have only narrowed the search to women who were not as heavy as him and who had less facial hair—his parents nonetheless felt as though they were well armed to go searching for another daughter-in-law. Vijay, however, felt as though he had only been an impressionist when describing his ideal woman. He had painted broad characteristics and traits rather than specific details about the woman herself. He thought to himself, any number of women could be the woman that he had described, however, only one would be the right one. His search, hopefully, would lead him to that one right woman.

2

Looking Good on Paper, it’s all Bio-Debatable

Vijay awoke the next morning to the sound of his parents talking in the kitchen below his bedroom. He rose from the bed and slowly walked down the stairs to join them. Jayendrabhai and Shantiben were sitting at the kitchen table sipping their morning cup of chai and shifting through papers.

“What’re you doing?” he asked them half-awake. “Are you looking for a new job, dad?” Vijay was looking at all of the sheets of paper from across the room while pouring himself a cup of chai by the stove. They looked very similar to resumes.

“No, we are actually trying to make your bio-data based on the information you gave us yesterday,” responded Jayendrabhai matterof-factly. Vijay stopped in mid pour and snapped out of his groggy state. Seeing the puzzled and wary look on Vijay’s face, he explained that a bio-data was like a resume, but it was used more to describe a person and not their job experience. It was these bio-datas that were first exchanged and started the process. If there then was interest in what they read, they could take it to the next level to see if there was any interest in what they heard by telephone and then to the final level to see if there was any interest in what they saw by meeting in person.

“Wait a minute!” Vijay interrupted, “If you’re putting my bio-data together, I want to know what it’s going to say!” He could just imagine his parents putting down every embarrassing detail about his life. “Let’s make it together,” he offered. Jayendrabhai and Shantiben agreed and told him that they were looking at other girls’ bio-datas that they had received in order to try and figure out how best to make his bio-data. With Rohit’s quick wedding in India, there had been no need for a bio-data for him.

Vijay looked up at them with sudden suspicion after seeing a number of the bio-datas strewn about on the table, and asked, “If I only told you last week I was okay with all of this, then how come you already have so many bio-datas of girls here?”

“Do not be alarmed,” his father said, sensing that Vijay was beginning to question the process. He explained that some people freely distributed bio-datas like flyers for a party, and that they had received these bio-datas over a period of months now. “None of them were worth mentioning so we never told you about them,” he explained. “But of course, we will be more selective about who we send your biodata to.”

Satisfied that his information wasn’t going to be plastered on every lamppost across America, Vijay took a closer look at the bio-datas on the table. Although the women may not have been judged suitable by his parents, the format of their bio-datas were deemed useful for purposes of creating Vijay’s bio-data. Using them as a template, they all agreed that Vijay’s bio-data should start with his name centered up top in a bigger bolded font.

“Okay, next—what address and phone number should I put down?” Vijay asked his parents, having seen all the bio-datas on the table with that information below the name, “The house number and address or my apartment number and address?”

“I think you had better put the house address and phone number,” answered his father. “This way, if a girl’s parents call, we can talk first before you have to deal with them.”

Vijay could just imagine receiving strange phone calls at all hours with other parents grilling him and agreed that it would probably be better if his parents screened the telephone calls first, even if it meant the woman might first be grilled by his parents. Better her being grilled than him he thought.

“Next, most of these bio-datas list height and weight.” Vijay read, surprised that this type of personal information was made public knowledge. “I wonder why this one doesn’t list that?” he pointed to one of the bio-datas that did not include this information.

Jayendrabhai just shook his head and rolled his eyes. “Anytime we get any of these and don’t see that information I assume bad things,” he intimated. Shantiben hit Jayendrabhai on the back with her hand, scolding him that Vijay wouldn’t meet anyone if he kept saying rude things like that.

Vijay disregarded their antics, agreeing to put this information down in his bio-data so as to not raise unnecessary suspicions that he was four feet tall and three hundred pounds, and went to the next item. “Next, all of these bio-datas have their birth dates listed.” Vijay read one of the bio-datas his parents had received and noted the date. “This girl was born in 1965!” She’s more than four years older than me!”

“I know. That is why we did not even show you this one,” his father explained. “But while we are on the subject, how old can the girl be?”

“I think you should be trying to find someone who is being three years younger than you. Girls are looking older faster than boys,” Shantiben tried to make her case.

“Let’s keep this fairly open. I don’t mind seeing anyone around my age or younger,” Vijay offered.

“And how much younger is okay?” Jayendrabhai, the master of closing the loop, asked. “Remember, you don’t want someone without their degree,” he insisted. “You’ll have to pay for her schooling. You should try to find someone who is already done with her education, has no student loans, and who has a good job.” The old routine about double incomes was about to begin.

“Next,” Vijay said in a tone that indicated he wasn’t willing to get into this subject again, “all of these bio-datas list education and occupation. Geez! One of the women even listed her salary!” Vijay was immediately turned off, thinking the woman to be materialistic, hoping to win a man by flashing a big salary.

“Do not be so hasty,” his father tried to calm him down. “It might have just been the parents who put this in without her even knowing it.”

Vijay couldn’t decide if his father was pushing the woman just because she earned $70,000 a year. Seeing the look in his eye, Jayendrabhai said laughing, “I am just trying to say that not all parents go through this with their kids, so do not automatically blame the girl.”

Vijay agreed that what his father was saying made sense. “Next, these bio-datas list family members and their occupation and education. What’s the point of that, I’m not going to be marrying them?” he asked his parents.

Shantiben explained, “It is like we have always been telling you. When you marry someone Indian, you not only are marrying the person, but their family as well.”

As Vijay sat there and thought about it, he realized the bio-data was, at some level, part TRW credit report and part balance sheet. Even the number of brothers and sisters in the family were listed because it had a financial impact. On one hand, being an only child could be a liability because of potential obligations related to caring for the parents. On the other hand, it could be an asset because of potential undivided inheritances. Either way, he was certain that his father would work out the financial scenarios for any bio-data that came his way.

“All that’s left to do now is for me to put in a description of who I am and what I’m looking for,” Vijay said out loud looking again at his precedent documents. After reading one of them more closely, he looked up at his parents and asked them, “So how come you never showed me this one? Leena Patel. She’s finishing med school and she seems interesting based on how she describes herself.”

Jayendrabhai and Shantiben looked at each other with surprise. “Which one are you talking about?” his father asked him. Vijay handed him Leena’s bio-data.

“Hmm,” Jayendrabhai said with growing interest as he looked over the bio-data. It was almost as if the paper he held in his hands was a lottery ticket with the winning numbers which, by accident, had been left in a drawer waiting to be found. “Shanti, get the pictures out of the drawer!” he commanded excitedly to his mother.

Vijay’s ears perked up. “Pictures? You never mentioned pictures!”

“Of course you are needing pictures to see who you are talking to,” his mother said as if Vijay was talking nonsense. She then handed an envelope from one of the kitchen drawers to Jayendrabhai. He began to take them out, trying to match them up to the names on each of the bio-datas on the table. After finding Leena’s picture, he handed it over to Vijay.

Vijay received the picture face down with Leena’s name written on the back. When he turned it around he understood why his parents hadn’t shown it to him. Leena was a rather plain looking girl with really thick eyeglasses that gave her a bug-eye appearance. She looked very studious with very thick hair. Vijay could tell she was not his type.

He slid the picture across the kitchen table back to his father, asking him, “What do you do with these pictures if we’re not interested?”

“We’ll send them back soon,” he explained. Evidently, Shantiben thought they shouldn’t return them immediately for fear of making it look like they only had spent a second before deciding against the match, although that effectively is what had happened.

Vijay began to see the organization and structure involved in the entire arranged process. The whole point was to try and exchange as much information as was possible about each other before even saying a word to the other person. If a person’s bio-data and picture were returned, it was a polite way of saying “thanks, but no thanks” without having to personally become entangled. Evidently, this was all part of the arranged process.

3

Mind, Body and Soul

Later that week Vijay met Rocky for lunch at a local Mexican food restaurant known more for cheap rather then good food. Ever since Amit’s wedding, Rocky and Vijay had become closer friends. This was true even more so now when Vijay heard from Amit that Rocky, too, was going through the same process that he had committed himself to with his parents. In fact, Rocky was two years older than Vijay and had been doing this for over three years now. Rocky was a veteran in these matters and a good source of guidance from a perspective that his parents couldn’t be.

“My parents want to use these pictures of me in a tuxedo from Amit’s wedding to go with my bio-data but I kinda feel weird about using them,” said Vijay as he showed Rocky the three pictures his father had taken of him after they had placed their order with the waiter.

Rocky grimaced, “You don’t want pictures of you so dressed up, especially in a tuxedo! It’s almost like a message to women that you really aren’t much to look at, which is why you put on a tux to give you every advantage you possibly could get. This is kinda like the male version of the Glamour Shot pictures theory.”

“What’s that?” asked Vijay, having never heard of such a theory.

“You know,” he said, “Glamour Shots. It’s that place where a woman goes in and they put all of this make-up on her and take pictures. It’s amazing how beautiful they can make anyone look!” Rocky let out. “But it’s also a little weird because you barely recognize the woman sometimes because they make her look so different!”

“Isn’t that a good thing though?” Vijay rationalized. “Bottom line, if a guy sees a picture of a woman who looks awesome, they’re more likely to call her. I know I would,” he admitted.

“That’s true,” Rocky agreed. “But you might end up talking to some woman you think is beautiful, only to find out, once you meet her in person, that you’re not at all attracted to her,” Rocky explained. “It’s like I tell everyone. If you see that little logo for Glamour Shots on the bottom of the picture, it’s a message like the one you see in car side view mirrors—‘Objects in this picture appear more attractive than they may be in person’.”

Vijay laughed, “All right, I won’t make the same mistake by putting on a tux. But tell me something though,” he asked seriously, “If these pictures we look at are so important, isn’t it all a little superficial? I never thought I would end up with a woman just based on how pretty she looked in a picture,” said Vijay.

“But that’s not what you’re doing! The pictures are just the first criteria to decide whether the woman is someone you want to even talk to,” Rocky explained. “Even if she was gorgeous, if you talk to her and have nothing in common, you probably won’t marry her.”

“I guess you’re right,” Vijay admitted. “But it’s still superficial, no matter how you try to rationalize it. When all is said and done, you really only end up talking to women who’s pictures you like!” Vijay persisted.

“But why is that so bad?” Rocky asked Vijay. “Someone once said that when you fall in love with someone, you love them for their mind, body and soul. They’re all equally important, including the body part. In fact, that’s what gets me angry when people complain about others who judge based on looks.” Rocky was getting very animated as he tried to prove his point. “Take some guy, for example, who finds an incredibly beautiful girl who really likes him, but he turns her down because he doesn’t feel that she’s very interesting or very smart. People will say this guy has substance, because he’s not looking for a trophy wife. But take another guy who meets someone with the greatest personality and who’s really smart, and he turns her down because the guy doesn’t think she’s got a good enough body. This guy will catch hell for being superficial. What I don’t understand is what has one guy done differently from the other guy? They’ve both decided not to go out with a woman based on a certain characteristic that they didn’t feel was appealing.”

“But a person can’t really change how they look,” Vijay tried to rationalize the differential in treatment.

“No more than a person can change how intelligent they are or how good a personality they have,” Rocky rebutted.

“So we’re right back where we started,” Vijay said with a sigh. “I should try to get pictures of me that are as good as possible so that women find me attractive and will at least call me.”

“That’s right. And you’ll probably only call women who look great in the pictures you get. And it might all be superficial, but that’s okay,” Rocky said.

“Mind, body and soul,” Vijay repeated. “I’ll have to keep that in mind when I go through the pictures. Thanks for the advice,” Vijay said gratefully.

“Not a problem. I understand what you’re going through. But remember, this is only the beginning,” he said, intimating a long journey lay ahead.

Vijay certainly hoped Rocky was wrong.

A RANGE OF OPTIONS

1

An Introduction to Introductions

Less than a month had passed when the first arranged opportunity was presented to Vijay. He came home on a Saturday afternoon because his parents were throwing a dinner party that evening and his presence as part of the host family was expected. He found his mother frantically cooking with two of her closest friends and Vaishali helping her in the kitchen. Shantiben was a very good cook which was something he hadn’t appreciated while growing up, preferring pizzas and burritos over her Indian meals of roti, shaak, baath, and daal. Now, living away from home with very poor cooking skills and more Pizza Hut and Taco Bell meals than he cared to admit, he appreciated coming back to her home cooking.

Vijay immediately went to the stove for taste testing opportunities. The wall behind the stove glistened from the roll of aluminum foil that had been placed over it like wallpaper to keep the sprays of oil from damaging the paint. Leena auntie looked at him from across the kitchen and said with a smile, “So, I hear you are on the girl market now!” She, along with her husband, Rajan uncle, had been friends of the family for as long as Vijay could remember. Although not related, Vijay, as did most Indian children when referring to their parents’ friends, added an uncle or auntie to the end of their name. He would no sooner call them by only their first name than he would to his parents.

He turned to face his mother with a half-eaten samosa in his hand soaked in mint green chutney and groaned, “Mom, do you have to tell everyone I’m doing this?”

Shantiben quickly put the lid on the pot Vijay had taken a taste from partly to keep what was inside warm and partly to keep him from finishing it before it was dinner time, answering his question with an annoyed tone, “Of course we are needing to tell everyone! That is the point! Everyone must be helping you find someone so everyone is needing to know!”

Leena auntie laughed interrupting their playful bickering while motioning for Vijay to come to her. He walked across the kitchen to where she was making puris, using a rolling pin to shape the dough into small pancake sized medallions that would then be fried and used as bread with dinner. “When your mom told me that you were going to start looking for a wife, Rajan uncle and I immediately thought of someone for you. Her name is Megha.”

“Oh, do you mean Megha Desai?” he asked tentatively, recalling a woman he had met at one of the parties that Amit had thrown at his apartment what seemed like years ago. He seemed to remember a woman with earrings and piercings in more places than Vijay thought desirable. “I think I already know her. She went to USC, right?” Vijay mentally began to think of escape plans. Did he think of her like a sister? Did one of his friends go out with her which made things complicated? He didn’t quite know which excuse he would have to pull out to avoid being set up with her as a part of the arranged process.

“No. This is a different Megha,” she replied. “This Megha is very smart and very pretty.” Vijay temporarily put a halt to his escape plans. Leena auntie went on to explain that when Rajan uncle had first come to America to get his masters degree, he had shared an apartment with Megha’s father and they had since become good friends. His family, including Megha, currently lived in North Carolina. “We both think you will really like her. Talk to Rajan uncle tonight. He can tell you more.”

Vijay was both excited and intrigued. It sounded like he would be introduced to a wonderful woman who he would never have met had he not agreed to submit to the process. Perhaps this wouldn’t be so bad after all.

Car after car parked along the curb near their house as guests began to arrive.

“Hello Vijay, it’s been a long time!” Suhas uncle, one of the few Indian friends of his parents who was taller than Vijay, shook his hand vigorously as he entered into the house. Vijay was answering the door while his mother and father were attending to the guests who had already arrived.

Manju auntie, Suhas uncle’s wife, came behind through the doorway. “Have you found a nice girl and settled down yet?” she asked the follow-up question. Their only child had just been married off, allowing them to now focus their efforts on “assisting” Vijay’s and other parents with single children in their search for suitable matches.

Vijay could only reply back with a polite smile, realizing their questions would probably only be the beginning. After all of the guests had arrived and were being fed and entertained by his parents, Vijay escaped to the back yard to get away from having to explain why he had not yet gotten married. He sat down on the swing and took a deep breath to collect himself.

“There was a swing just like this one in the house your dad grew up in when he lived in India. We would sit on it, staring up at the night sky during power blackouts, talking about girls,” said Rajan uncle with a smile, as he opened and closed the screen door, coming through in between the two motions. Rajan uncle was close to Vijay’s father’s age, although he was taller and broader with white hair. Jayendrabhai and Rajan uncle had grown up in the same neighborhood in Nadiad, a small village in central Gujarat. “And now I find myself talking about girls again with his son thirty years later!” he laughed at the strangeness of it all as he joined Vijay on the swing. He no doubt saw this as an opportunity to talk to him about Megha.

“Don’t worry, it feels ten times weirder for me,” Vijay said with a sigh. “This isn’t the kind of stuff I love to talk to about with my folks or their friends if you know what I mean.” Although television after-school specials and community service commercials always urged parents to openly talk to their children about sex and relationships, those were subjects that were taboo and rarely discussed in Indian households. It was just assumed that the children would learn how to deal with these issues by osmosis in the hopes that any awkward discussions between parents and children regarding these topics could be avoided.

“I agree that it’s all a little strange,” Rajan uncle replied, staring up at the night sky. He, although his parents’ age, appreciated more than others that what worked in India in their generation didn’t necessarily apply to people of Vijay’s generation who had been raised in America. “But let me ask you just so that I know. Do you think you’re ready to get married?”

After taking a moment before answering, not quite certain what married life meant yet, Vijay replied not all together convincingly, “I think so. I guess I’ll only really know when the right girl comes along and I have to decide.”

His answer, even though lacking in conviction, seemed to satisfy Rajan uncle. He said, “There is someone that I would like to introduce you to. She’s the daughter of a very close friend of mine.” Rajan uncle started the swing again and looked at him. “I gave your parents her bio-data and picture. If you like what you see, just call her. Who knows? If things go well, then maybe after a few months you can decide if it could work or not for the long-term.”

“A few months? So soon?” Vijay asked, alarmed at the time constraints that had been implicitly put upon him. He feared this process was not any different than the one Rohit had subjected himself to in India where lifetime decisions were made in a matter of months if not days. He thought back to his relationship with Jennifer, where going steady first involved dating, then sleeping with each other and finally living together, learning about each other’s foibles and true mannerisms as opposed to only seeing the best, albeit incomplete, side of a person. Through this arranged process where parents were involved, such conduct was unthinkable. Vijay thought this ironic given that it truly was the best way to determine if you were compatible with someone, more so than any information that might be contained in a bio-data.

“That’s not so soon,” Rajan uncle defended. “Look, you’re twenty-seven right?” He started no doubt hoping to explain why the process worked as swiftly as it did.

“Let me guess,” Vijay interrupted him grumpily, thinking he understood where he was taking the conversation and was disappointed that even Rajan uncle had fallen into his parents’ camp on this issue. “You’re going to warn me that I’ll be over the hill unless I decide quickly, right?”

Rajan uncle laughed and put his arm around Vijay’s shoulder. “Would someone who got married when they were thirty years old say that to a twenty-seven year old youngster?” This surprised Vijay. He thought everyone in his parents’ generation had gotten married very young. Evidently, however, when Rajan uncle had first moved to America as a student, he barely earned enough money washing dishes in order to pay tuition and rent let alone to fly back to India to find a wife. “It was years later after I graduated and found a job that I was able to go back and meet Leena!”

“But how did Leena auntie hold out for so long though?” Vijay asked, curious. “Her parents must have wanted her to get married before she was thirty.”

Rajan uncle agreed with a grin. “You’re right! They kept telling her she was getting too old and that there wouldn’t be anyone who’d want to marry her. But she held out, and married me when she was an ‘over the hill’ twenty-two years old!”

Vijay was surprised at the revelation, having never known that there was such a large age difference between the two of them. “So there was no problem with the families about this?” he asked, now fascinated with the story.

“No problems, but do you see the point I’m trying to make? You can always marry someone younger, so you don’t have to rush because you’re afraid you’ll be over the hill. But girls usually don’t marry guys younger than them, which means they have to look more quickly before all the older guys are taken. And if a girl needs to know quickly, that means you have to decide quickly. That is why there is a rush for you.”

Vijay could understand the rationale behind Rajan uncle’s arguments, but nonetheless was unhappy about the conclusion it drove him to. “You have to realize, although getting married after a short time may be the normal thing to do in India, it’s not how people get married here unless drinking and Las Vegas are involved.”

“But why can’t it be?” Rajan uncle insisted. “Your parents and all of your uncles and aunties decided in even less time. Everything worked out. Sometimes you can’t think too much. You just have to close your eyes and decide.”

Sitting on the swing in the quiet evening with a sky full of stars, Vijay realized that perhaps this wouldn’t be as difficult a decision to make in a short timeframe. If it was meant to be, it was meant to be. If it was up to fate, things should happen quickly and effortlessly. As Rajan uncle stood up to go inside and eat dinner, Vijay asked himself, after repeating the thought in his mind several times, who was he trying to fool.

2

First Contact

It was well after midnight and only Vijay and Shantiben remained in the kitchen accompanied by the hum of the dishwasher.

“Well, I’m off to bed,” Vijay groaned as he stretched, yawned, and headed towards his room upstairs.

Shantiben stopped him from leaving, saying “Wait, I am to show you something. Leena is giving me Megha’s bio-data and pictures before she left. Tell me what you are thinking,” she handed him a plain white envelope from one of the kitchen drawers.

Vijay eagerly pulled out a folded bio-data from the already opened envelope. A picture had been placed within the three folds of the one page of vital statistics describing Megha. He disregarded the bio-data for the moment, concentrating on the picture. The photograph of Megha was in front of what must have been her parents’ house. The problem was, however, that it was a photograph more of the house rather than of Megha, with her being small in comparison and her features being practically indistinguishable. He turned to her bio-data, which, too, was sparse, disclosing only the necessary details. All he could tell from the information in the envelope was that Megha was a pharmacist who worked in a hospital, she was three months older than him, and she wasn’t so big that she blocked out the front of her house when the picture was being taken.

“Just give it a chance,” Shantiben requested seeing his look of disappointment. He had set in his mind such high expectations from the glowing reviews he had heard earlier in the day. These expectations, however, hadn’t exactly matched up with the limited information he held in his hands. “Rajanbhai and others who know her think she is very nice. You talk to her. Know her. And if things work well, you meet her and then you decide.”

The next day Vijay drove back to his apartment from his parent’s house after lunch. Because of the three-hour difference, he realized he would have to call fairly early that evening if he was going to talk to Megha. He pulled out the envelope with her phone number and looked at it. He picked up the phone, but no sooner had he dialed the area code that he hung up. Although he usually didn’t have problems talking to people, either on the phone or in person, this was about to be one of the more unusual phone calls that he would make and he needed to figure out how to do it properly. He began to pace back and forth in his apartment trying to script up a dialogue.

“Hi, how’s it goin’? My name is Vijay—I’m calling to find out if you and I should get married,” Vijay said to himself in an announcer voice. He then slapped himself for the stupidity of that line. Getting the phone conversation started, however, wasn’t the only problem. He didn’t know what he should talk about or ask her during the conversation. “So, how many kids do you want to have?” just didn’t seem to be the kind of thing to ask someone he didn’t even know yet. After forty five minutes of pacing around evaluating various approaches, considering each one more lame than the other, Vijay in a fit of anger at himself at how stupid he was being, picked up the phone and dialed Megha’s number.

“Hello?” an elder male voice answered the phone. Vijay unhappily realized he would not be so lucky as to get Megha on the line without putting anyone else on notice. “Who’s calling please?” the voice asked.

“My name is Vijay, I’m calling from California…” he had to go no further in his explanation.

“Oh, yes! Rajanbhai has told us all about you! I’m Megha’s father. Let me get her for you.”

After what felt like an eternity a second receiver picked up and a voice yelled out “Okay I got it! Hang up!” After the sound of the first receiver hanging up could be heard, a female voice said, “Hello, this is Megha.”

“Hi, my name is Vijay, and well, I got your phone number from Rajan uncle in Los Angeles, and he said I should give you a call.” Vijay grimaced to himself because his opening line was choppy and just didn’t sound as smooth as he had been rehearsing it.

Megha, however, picked up the conversation sensing that his introduction may have been as far as he had gotten in drafting dialogue. “Hi! I know, this is all kind of awkward isn’t it?” she asked the rhetorical question full of energy without any sense of awkwardness in being involved in a conversation like the one they were having. “Believe me, though, I’ve gotten used to phone calls from people I’ve never heard from in my life. At least this is much better because I knew you’d be calling so I had time to mentally prepare!” she laughed, releasing some of the tension.

Vijay immediately felt at ease with her. She was very friendly and fun to talk to. Twenty minutes later, after speaking to her about everything except the issue of marriage, Vijay said, “I have to admit, I was a little nervous about making this call. This is the first time that I’ve ever had to do this and I just wasn’t quite sure what I should talk about.”

“Believe me, this is one of the better first conversations I’ve had,” she reassured him. “Just talking about whatever comes to mind instead of following some questionnaire of marital issues is always the better way to go. Besides, I feel that you really can learn more about a person indirectly than you can with loaded direct questions.”

“It sure sounds like you’re a professional at dealing with all this,” said Vijay, declaring his amateur status. “I’m just glad you’re the first woman I’ve called this way. You help take a lot of the awkwardness out of the whole situation with your positive attitude.”

There was a brief moment of silence and then a sigh. “I’m as upbeat about all of this as the next person, but don’t let me fool you. This takes a lot out of me. It’s tough when it doesn’t work out. All I can do to pull through is to think that it just wasn’t meant to be. I guess I just believe in fate. Or at least, maybe I make myself believe in fate so that I just don’t totally get depressed.”

Fate. Vijay had heard this concept several times now. He always believed fate to be nothing more than a matter of cognitive dissonance, a means to characterize bad outcomes into good ones as a process for the mind to heal itself from the wounds of failure. That if it didn’t work out with one person, it was okay, because there was someone better waiting, somewhere down the road. For some, that road might be a short one. For others, it might be a long and wearisome journey. The only point was to reach the final destination. As he sat there talking to Megha, he hoped that she would be both the start and end to that journey.

3

Progressing to Progress

Two weeks had passed by since Vijay had first spoken to Megha. During that time, Vijay had spoken to her on four occasions while his parents and Rajan uncle had spoken to him about her on six occasions. They kept calling, asking him about the progress that he and Megha were making.

“What exactly do they mean when they’re asking if we’re making progress?” Vijay asked at night during one of their telephone conversations. “Do they mean are we setting wedding dates or naming our kids?”

Megha laughed. “No, I think that everyone is just curious to know what we think and whether we like each other,” she explained.

“Well, let me ask you then. What do we think of each other?” he asked. Up to now, their conversations were enjoyable, but they had danced around the entire purpose of the phone calls. His question was the first overt push towards determining the progress issue.

Megha took a moment to compose her answer, realizing that she wouldn’t be able to avoid responding having been put on the spot. “It does seem like we have a good time over the phone, well, at least I can say that I do…” she trailed off full of intent and meaning.

“I feel that way too,” Vijay safely agreed, relieved because she seemed interested in going further. After further reflection Vijay spoke up again, although he thought he knew the answer before asking the question, “So what do we need to do to make progress?”

After another brief lapse, she answered “We meet.” Letting a moment pass so that those two words could sink in, she followed softly with a “That would be progress.”

“Meet in person.” Vijay repeated out loud to hear how it sounded coming from him. It sounded like it made sense. He silently took a deep breath and in the name of progress asked, “So, when can you come over to visit?”

“Why should I come there?” she immediately asked back in a laughing yet defiant tone.

“Don’t worry, it’s not a ‘because I’m the guy’ thing. I just thought since Rajan uncle and Leena auntie are here, you’d have a place to stay,” he explained. “After all, I don’t know anyone in North Carolina to stay with. I’ll plan a really fun weekend for us if you come visit,” Vijay offered sincerely.

“Okay,” she conceded, “I guess I could come over if it’s in the name of progress.”

With that, they said good-bye and Vijay hung up the phone. A sense of excitement and panic set in. Megha was coming for a visit.

4

She Could be a One in a Hundred

Although Vijay and Megha had decided to make progress by meeting in person, it had taken over a month and many more phone calls to coordinate their work schedules and plane tickets.

It was dark and all the lights were out. Vijay lay in bed, ready to go to sleep himself. He was on the phone with Megha. This was their third phone call of the day. At first, Vijay had wondered if he talked to Megha for a while, whether their conversations would become more difficult to maintain. He worried that once he had run out of his funny anecdotes and stories of the past, there would be nothing left to talk about. But to his pleasant surprise, their conversations, if anything, became easier and more interesting over time. Based on the knowledge of each other’s past and present lives and experiences, the seeds for future conversations were constantly being planted.

“Are you at all nervous about meeting in person?” she asked through the darkness. Her flight to Los Angeles would leave in the afternoon tomorrow.

“Are you kidding me?” he replied, “I’ll be lucky to get any sleep for the next two nights! At least you’ve gone through this before!”

“To tell you the truth, I don’t think you can ever stop that anxious feeling. At first, you feel nervous just because you never know what to expect from all of this. Then later on, you’re still nervous because it’s been a while that you’ve done this, and you’re expecting that each next time will finally be that right time. It’s as if you have a one in hundred chance of finding the right person, and so after ninety-nine times, you expect to be due. But the truth is even on the one hundredth person you meet, you’re odds are no better than the first time. They’re still a disappointing one in a hundred,” her voice trailed off into uncertainty.

“Here’s hoping that the odds are in our favor this time around,” Vijay said. After wishing her a goodnight and a safe flight, he fumbled in the darkness to hang up the phone. It must have fallen on the floor from the bed during their conversation. He flipped on the light switch, blinking his eyes as they got used to the brightness again.

After putting the phone back in its place, he went to his desk, fumbling through several stacks of papers until he found what he was looking for. He held it up to the light. It was the picture of Megha that he had received just two months ago. He was hoping that after having spoken to her for so many times, the image in the picture would have come into focus; larger and more clear. He lay back down in bed, turning off the light. Megha’s voice kept ringing in his head with her soft yet pleasant laughter echoing from one side to the other.

He drew a mental picture of her based on the photograph he held, trying to fill in the gaps with details he had come to know about her by telephone. In his mind came the picture of a beautiful woman, both caring and full of life. This could be the one, he thought. His expectations and hopes rose, despite the logical side in him warning him of the consequences. He quietly whispered to himself as he put Megha’s picture on a close by nightstand, “Here’s hoping that we’re each other’s one in a hundred.” He slowly fell asleep.

5

The Perfect Imperfect Person

The morning sun woke Vijay up minutes before his alarm clock did. As he opened his eyes, still in a semi-drowsy state, it hit him like a thunderbolt. It was Saturday. He would finally meet Megha today.

He jumped out of bed fully awake and went to the bathroom to get ready. The itinerary for the day involved only one thing—Disneyland. Megha had never visited the magic kingdom and Vijay thought it a good place to go because although the lines would be long, it would provide them with a chance to better get to know each other in a fun setting.

After getting ready, he drove to Leena auntie and Rajan uncle’s house who, like his parents, also lived in Yorba Linda, to take Megha out on their get-to-know-each-other-date. Rajan uncle had picked Megha up from the airport the evening before insisting that he and Leena auntie get at least one evening with Megha before Vijay monopolized her time. It was awkward enough having to meet her for the first time, but to have to do it with Rajan uncle and Leena auntie there made it even more of an ordeal. As he walked up the front path of their house, the only saving grace, he thought to himself, was that his parents weren’t there with him as well. This wasn’t to say that they hadn’t offered. Vijay, however, had convinced them that it wasn’t necessary because they would meet Megha tomorrow when he brought her home for dinner.

He rang the doorbell.

“Hello!” Rajan uncle answered the door.

“Hi Vijay,” Leena auntie said from behind Rajan uncle with a smile.

“Hi Rajan uncle, Leena auntie,” he addressed each of them one at a time. He then asked, purposely before coming in, “Is Megha ready to go?” He wanted to just pick her up and leave.

“Come in and sit down,” Rajan uncle insisted, “we’ve just finished breakfast. Megha only now went upstairs to get ready.” With that, Vijay feared that any hopes of a quick exit had been thrown out the window. However, no sooner than having walked into the main hallway came Megha, down the stairs, two at a time, wearing a pair of faded denim overalls with a backpack purse hanging from one shoulder, and her hair in a ponytail with a scrunchie holding it in place. She had soft delicate features and a button nose to go along with a pleasant smile.

As he looked at her, his immediate reaction was one of relief. Although her practicality, self-confidence, and voice were well known to him, he up to now had still been in the dark as to how she really looked. He had been worried that when he saw her he might find her to be unattractive. That certainly was not the case. But knowing that he didn’t find her to be unattractive was only one-half of the battle. He needed to now figure out whether he found her to be attractive to him. The answer to that, to his chagrin, was unfortunately not as readily apparent.

Everyone knew who everyone was, and so the need for introductions didn’t seem necessary. “Come, sit down for a minute,” offered Leena auntie.

“No, we can’t really,” Megha looked at Vijay as if that were a cue. Before either Rajan uncle or Leena auntie could make another request, the front door had been opened with Megha already through. She was evidently in a rush to get out. Vijay caught up to her outside and let her in the car. He closed the door and went around to enter in on the driver’s side. While doing so he said good-bye to Rajan uncle and Leena auntie while Megha did the same.

And with that, Vijay and Megha drove away. After a few minutes, she let out a sigh. “Sorry about rushing out like that. It’s just that, well, I was so late in the first place because they were giving me the standard speech and lecture and I just couldn’t take it any more. I was literally about to scream!”

“That doesn’t sound like a good way to start your weekend here,” Vijay said consolingly.

“Why do they feel like I don’t want to find anyone?!” she ranted, blowing off the steam that must have accumulated while she was politely listening to Rajan uncle and Leena auntie’s lectures.

Vijay just drove on, listening only, waiting for when she really wanted him to respond.

“All they did was talk about having to decide quickly before it was too late! They keep pushing me!” she complained to herself out loud, her voice rising all the while.

After some silence, Vijay offered, “Sometimes I wonder if they all just think we can’t take that first step. You know. It’s almost like they see us standing at the edge of a swimming pool, wanting so much to go in, but we don’t because we’re afraid that the water is too cold even though everyone is telling us that the water is fine. By saying all the things they do, they might just be trying to push us into the pool so that we can join the fun.”

“I think I’m more worried that I’m not getting pushed into a pool, but off of a cliff! I just want to know for sure before I jump!” she complained.

They drove in silence for a while, each contemplating the risks that they at some point would have to take when they made their jump.

“Ok! Enough of this!” Vijay broke the silence. “We’re going to Disneyland! I propose a rule. No more talk about all this business. I think we’ll be talking about all of this stuff later anyways. There’s no sense in ruining a visit to Disneyland over it, don’t you think?” he proposed.

“Well, okay, at least for today,” she agreed reluctantly as they pulled into the Disneyland parking lot.

Once the decision to abandon the serious topics was made, the day as well as their conversations became much more enjoyable, as if they were on the telephone again. Despite this, however, Vijay grew concerned. Throughout the day, as they waited in lines for various rides, Vijay would often sneak careful glances at Megha. The truth was he still wasn’t sure how he felt about her, even after having met her in person for the day. This meeting of theirs was intended to answer the many questions that they had remaining. The biggest and perhaps all encompassing question was whether he could see himself spending the rest of his life with her. To that he had no definite answer. Was there significance to that fact, even if he had only been with her just one day? Megha, on paper, was just what he was looking for. That, he began to realize, was the most frustrating part of everything. She had a great personality, was bright and attractive. Yet, in the words of his relatives, it just didn’t seem to “click” when he had met her. There had been no fireworks. Something was missing.

After a long day at Disneyland, they drove home. Megha watched the cars parked along the curb whiz by as Vijay kept his eyes fixed to the road, silent. They came to a stop at a red light.

“So, let me ask you something. Did we make any progress today?” They had spent the entire day avoiding the purpose of Megha’s visit. Now, while driving home, Vijay felt like the topic needed to surface again.

“I don’t know,” she quietly replied, not looking at him. “Actually, no, I don’t think we have, or at least, I haven’t. I still don’t know how I feel,” she said in an exasperated tone.

Vijay shifted his gaze away from the road towards her for a brief moment, a look of relief on his face. “I feel the same way and I don’t know what that means. It just might be that I’m afraid. Or maybe it means that this isn’t right. I don’t know,” he said helplessly.

“I know,” she responded understandingly. “The only thing we can do is to keep talking and see where we go from there. Until we know more. That is, unless you don’t even think that’s worthwhile,” she asked, not wanting to assume anything.

Vijay hesitated for a second. “I think some more time would help me, err, us, to figure things out. It’s definitely worth it,” Vijay agreed. “I’m just wondering, will we get that time?”

“Let’s just take this one day at a time for now,” she said, “and use the time that we definitely have. Tomorrow. If we need more time, we can worry about that later.”

Vijay turned the car into Leena auntie and Rajan uncle’s driveway. All of the lights were out in the house except for the one over the front porch.

“I’ll pick you up at eleven in the morning. We can just go around here and spend some serious time figuring things out,” Vijay offered.

“That would be good,” she agreed with a nod.

Vijay saw her to the door, wished her a good night and walked back to his car, relieved that the whole day was now behind him. It wasn’t that he was disappointed in meeting Megha. It was more that he was disappointed that he was still uncertain, even after having spent the whole day with her. He wasn’t sure if she was the perfect person for him and that uncertainty troubled him greatly.

Vijay exited the freeway to go to his parent’s house, recalling how his parents continuously told him not to expect perfection, that he should be prepared to settle on some things. He had always fought the notion that he would be willing to settle for anything less than perfection. He often would argue with his parents that whenever he talked to his married friends, they always proclaimed that they had found their perfect persons despite the odds against it. If they could find such matches, why shouldn’t he expect to do the same?

As he drove up the hill to his parents’ house, however, he revisited this argument and began to question if what his married friends often proclaimed was really true. Had they really found their perfect persons? He had to admit even he doubted it at times. These doubts largely stemmed from the fact that some of his friends had ended up with spouses who were often not at all like the perfect persons they were looking for when they were single. Maybe what they were looking for in a perfect person had changed over time. Vijay believed, however, that it was more likely that his friends had just convinced themselves that they had found their perfect persons even if objectively they did not.

Maybe that was the secret, Vijay thought to himself. Maybe no one truly ever finds their perfect person, but they just convince themselves that they have. The question, however, was whether he believed that, and if so, whether he could believe that about Megha. But on another level, he thought to himself, was it wrong to actively try to convince himself that Megha was his perfect person even if he consciously knew that it might not exactly be true? After all, shouldn’t that process, whether objectively true or subconsciously decided, be an effortless exercise, not one that had to be worked on with practice as if it were a task?

These were far too many questions that he had running through his mind after a long day. He wondered because the whole process was on such a rushed basis, whether he would have the time to figure out the answers. The great uncertainty of it all overwhelmed him, and he sought sleep in the hope some guidance and clarity would come.

6

Order Disorder

The next morning’s sun came like a rude awakening through the window of his room at his parents’ house. Vijay opened his eyes and for a second, as he lay there in bed blinking, he wondered if it had all been a dream. A trial run of sorts. But as the sleepy haze slowly melted away, he sadly realized that the many questions he had asked himself last night remained unanswered.

He rolled out of bed, splashed some cold water on his face in the bathroom, and slowly treaded downstairs. His parents were already up as usual.

“Good morning Vijay. You’re up just in time for breakfast,” his father said getting up off the floor in the living room with the newspaper and heading towards the kitchen table. The truth of the matter was that his parents had already eaten their breakfast over an hour ago, but this would give them the opportunity to sit at the table with him and get details about yesterday.

Shantiben poured out some chai she had reheated. As Vijay took his first sip she asked, “So…what are you thinking? How did it go?”

He took an extra moment, and then let out a sigh and answered deliberately with a shrug of his shoulders, “She’s really nice. We had a nice time yesterday.”

“Good! Good! So you are liking her then?” she asked leadingly, handing him two slices of buttered toast. To her, the formula was simple: Two people from similarly good families and background meet plus they have a good time equals marriage.

“I don’t know, mom,” Vijay answered, his formula no doubt more complicated than her’s. “First of all, even though we had a good time yesterday, I don’t even know if she likes me and I’m still not sure if I really like her yet either.”

“What are you meaning? I am thinking you said you are having good times with each other?” She asked disappointed, sensing that wedding plans and the trip to India might have to wait.

“She’s great and everything, but it’s just that…,” he stopped for a lack of words to express his doubts. “We’re spending the day together trying to get to know each other more, so we’ll see what happens,” was all he could offer.

All this time his father was silent, but realizing Vijay’s uncertainty, he said “Don’t worry. Take your time. It’s only been one day. You still have today to find out,” he said, trying to sound hopeful, although keeping the clock ticking.

Vijay began to realize the urgency of deciding if Megha was the right one for him. “Well, I gotta go get ready if I’m going to have to figure things out that quickly,” he said grumpily after taking one last bite out of the slice of toast in his hand.

Vijay had chosen a small ocean side restaurant in nearby Laguna Niguel for brunch. By the time he and Megha finished lunch it was well after two in the afternoon. They saved any progress-making discussions until after eating, when they walked to the back entrance of the restaurant, took off their shoes, and went to the edge of the surf on the beach. They began to walk, leaving two parallel zigzag tracks in the wet sand as they dodged in and out, trying to avoid the cold water on their feet. Behind them, the waves that came further in erased any trace of their journey, almost as if the things they were revealing to each other were for one-time disclosure only, to be erased if things did not work out.

“You know, as long as we’ve talked and gotten to know each other, we really never have talked about the typical marriage issues,” said Vijay, the muted roar of the ocean waves in the background.

“You’re right,” Megha admitted, “That was one of the things that I liked about you. You were nothing like the other guys that usually asked me their prearranged questions on the first call.”

“Really?” Vijay asked, amused. “What were some of the things that they asked about?”

“You know, are you vegetarian? Can you cook? What’s your bra size?”

“Bra size?” Vijay burst out laughing. “You’re kidding, aren’t you?”

“Don’t even get me started about that guy,” Megha groaned. “I guess you need to ask the questions, but I just got tired of having to always answer them mechanically, especially right up front!”

“Well let me turn this around for you then,” Vijay said. “Do you have any questions you’d like to ask me?”

She looked at him thoughtfully as they walked, trying to determine if there was anything that she needed to know. “It’s strange, I’m usually the first to answer questions, not ask them.” They walked a bit further in silence and then she said, “Okay, here’s one. If we were to get married, could you move to North Carolina?”

“What?” Vijay looked at her in surprise. Apparently there would be no easy questions to get warmed up on.

“You didn’t automatically assume that I wanted to move to Los Angeles did you?” she asked, looking at him to gauge his response.

“Well, actually, I kinda did,” Vijay shrugged. “I just expected that was a given.” Vijay had automatically assumed that any life they spent together would be in Los Angeles. In Indian culture, the wife always followed the husband. Now Megha was questioning that. “Do you think you might not want to live here?” he now wanted to know. This was an important factor to consider.

“I don’t know. I guess I just want to know what you would do if, after being here for a while, I was miserable. Could you leave?”

Vijay wanted to say “no” but he chose a more diplomatic approach. “I guess I could if it made sense. But it would have to be a move that would make us both happy if we did it.” He was not liking the concessions he was already making nor where the conversation seemed to be going.

“Okay. How about family?” she brought up a new subject feeling like the first subject had already started things off on the wrong foot.

“I definitely want one!” Vijay responded with a laugh. “Two kids, one boy, one girl.”

“That’s exactly what I want!” she agreed, bringing harmony back to their discussion. “Although, I don’t think we have an exact say in how it all works out!” she joined in Vijay’s laughter.

And so it continued, with religion and parents following. They continued to walk and talk and went through many more questions and answers. Before either of them knew it, three hours had gone by and they had walked until their feet were impervious to the cold ocean water.

They returned to the car and slowly put their shoes on. Despite the rough start, their long talk did not uncover any issues that Vijay liked to call “deal breakers”, although additional doubts certainly had been raised. But just as there were some doubts raised, there were many more fears that were put to rest. Vijay and Megha were in fact very compatible. Although they had assumed that to be true as they had gotten to know each other by telephone, it was reassuring to hear, in person, that this was the case. Vijay thought all the while how strange it was that this knowledge was not coming through the normal evolution of a relationship, but rather through a forced and contrived question and answer process. It certainly took the spontaneity and fun out of courtship and made it more of an arranged process. Fitting, Vijay thought to himself, considering that if things worked out, their’s would be considered an arranged marriage.

It was time to go home to visit Vijay’s parents. When they arrived, Rajan uncle, who had arrived earlier with Leena auntie, got up and came to them and introduced Megha to Vijay’s parents. After the hellos and introductions had been made they all sat down in the family room. For a second, Vijay was afraid that an awkward silence was about to fill the room. But what followed was a lively conversation as Vijay’s parents made Megha feel at ease, and likewise, Megha made his parents feel at ease. Everyone seemed to like everyone and after a while, it seemed as though everyone in the room was getting the idea that Vijay and Megha might also like each other. Vijay stopped to think for a moment as he looked at Megha from across the room with a smile. It had been a good weekend after everything had been said and done, hadn’t it? It was almost as if the doubts of yesterday had somehow been completely erased from his memories by the feelings of reassurance today from his family and friends.

After dinner was eaten and the dishes cleared away, Vijay and Megha rose to leave. Although the original plan was for Megha to go back with Rajan uncle and Leena auntie, Vijay asked if he could drop her off later that night so that they could spend more time together. There was no disagreement from anyone as they all seemed to be secretly hoping for a successful match between them and wanted to do all they could to help make that happen. Vijay could especially see this in his parents’ eyes. The natural warmth and excitement that they showed to Megha was more than they had ever been able to show to Jennifer.

After saying their goodbyes and driving away, Vijay looked to Megha and said, “There’s a place a few miles down the road. A coffee house with nice big couches that we can lose ourselves in. Maybe we can hang out some more? Even after a whole weekend, I still don’t know what’s going on, with me, you, or us,” he shook his head slowly.

He was troubled that his feelings for Megha ebbed and flowed as much as they did.

“I think that’s a good idea,” she agreed, apparently feeling the same uncertainty.

Vijay drove down past three stoplights and made a left into a strip mall parking lot. At one end, the anchor tenant was a supermarket store, open 24 hours, as advertised in neon lights right below its name. At the other end was a Hallmark gift shop with an innocuous coffee house right next to it. He parked right in front, his headlights briefly intruding through the window inside the quiet, dimly lit structure.

They walked in and Megha picked out a purple velvet sofa in the corner of the room. It was warm and inviting, with the back and sides outrageously high, giving the person sitting on the sofa a sense of being tiny and surrounded by velvet. Vijay walked up to the counter, ordered two coffees, and carried them back to the sofa. Handing her a cup, he lifted his and took a careful sip, all the while just looking at her.

For some reason the euphoria, the sense of everything clicking and feeling right during dinner, was slipping away. It was as if he had been intoxicated with feelings and emotions while with his parents, overcome by their apparent happiness in seeing him with Megha. But the coffee was now bringing him back to sobriety and his parents were no longer in the room. The doubts and questions that he first had during the weekend were returning stronger than ever.

“So. Where do we go from here?” he asked her, confused and upset that the feelings of uncertainty had only temporarily been absent, having now come back in full strength.

“I don’t know. I think it’s time that we just be straight and lay our cards on the table,” she sighed.

“But I don’t know where to begin,” he complained. “There are times when I feel like you’re everything I want…” he let his thoughts start pouring out, not wasting any time laying out the usual disclaimers and ignoring all niceties.

“But…” she said for him, sensing that there was a ‘but’ in there somewhere that had caused a slight pause in his sentence.

“But, there are other times, well, I guess the thing that I think of a lot is that I just don’t always see fireworks going off when I’m with you.” He stopped the sentence abruptly and looked at her, hoping he hadn’t hurt her feelings. “Tell me something. Do you see any fireworks when you’re with me?” he asked, giving her the opportunity to say the same to keep the level of doubts even on both sides.

She looked in her cup for a second, and then took a sip. She responded quietly, more to the cup than to Vijay, “No.” She looked up at him. “But I don’t know if I even believe in fireworks anymore. I don’t even think I need fireworks to make a relationship work,” she looked back at her cup. “Which is why I could see potential for us.”

“Really?” Vijay asked, surprised.

“Don’t get me wrong! I don’t want to make it sound like I’m willing to settle for less now with you. You’re one of the nicest guys I’ve met through this whole thing, with or without fireworks.” She let out a frustrated sigh, having given up trying to coherently explain. She looked up at him and said, “I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s just a lot easier after all the guys I’ve met to not hold out for fireworks because such a feeling may never exist. Then you don’t expect them and don’t get disappointed.”

Vijay let the thought sink in for a moment and then realized why it was different for him. “That’s the problem for me though!” he responded, more animated as the uncertainty in him was solidifying into a concrete idea that he could intelligently express. “I’ve only started looking. You’re the first woman I’ve met. I still believe there can be fireworks. Maybe I’m just naïve and idealistic at this stage. Maybe later on I’ll realize there’s no such thing. But I haven’t even tried to look for them yet! I haven’t proved to myself that they can’t exist! And until I’ve at least looked, I’ll always wonder.”

Megha listened and then sat silently for a second. “You have to keep looking then. You can’t go into any relationship thinking ‘what if’,” Megha said as if the answer was simple.

“The frustrating thing is that you might be that right person for me, and that all of this is messed up only because of the order in which we met!” Vijay refused to believe such a simple answer had to be the answer. “I wonder, if I had met you after looking for a few years, having realized in that time, like you, that maybe there is no such thing as fireworks, whether I would be begging for you to be with me right now,” he said. There it was. The true reason why Vijay was in such anguish. Megha could be the one, yet he might not know it until later, when after meeting others, he finally realized it. But did that mean it could never work? Would it by then have been too late?

Vijay tried to crystallize his thoughts, asking Megha “Do you think that we could both meet other people, and, after a while, try again if we’re still looking?”

She looked up at him and answered full of doubt, “Maybe, but I think that’s something for the future. For now, I think we both know where we stand. At some level, I think I’m relieved as well. Maybe this is for the best…for both of us. So that we each hold out for those fireworks.”

“If they even exist,” Vijay finished.

They both got up and left. Vijay drove her to Leena auntie and Rajan uncle’s house. He pulled into the driveway and she looked at him.

“Thanks for a great weekend,” she said softly, with a sad smile.

“I had a great weekend too.”

“Good luck,” she said, getting out of the car, keeping the conversation to a minimum now.

“Good bye, and let’s please keep in touch,” Vijay answered. “And who knows? Maybe sometime in the future…,” Vijay ended hopefully.

“Maybe,” she said with a weak smile and closed the door. Vijay waited as she walked up to the door, opened it, and went inside. Sitting in his car in the darkness, he was alone once again.

7

The Rules vs. The Code

Months had passed since Megha had visited and the matrimonial machinery continued at full speed. Vijay and his parents regularly received photographs, bio-datas, and even phone calls from people across the country.

His parents were the first line of defense when the phone calls came because their phone number was on his bio-data. The calls usually went like “Hello, Jayendrabhai, this is K.C. Patel calling from West Virginia. Our friend Dhirendrabhai from Detroit, who knows Baraat Desai from North Carolina, who married your brother Pravin’s wife’s sister, told us about your son. We are having a daughter and we are looking for a boy for her.”

The standard operating procedure that Vijay had worked out with his parents when these calls came was simple. They were to send his picture and bio-data in return for the girl’s. Then, when Vijay had more information about the girl, including her picture so that he knew what she looked like, he would call her if he was interested and she would talk to him if she was interested.

Unfortunately, even after the preliminary due diligence, the follow-up conversations Vijay had were often not fruitful. This was only because there was no true way for Vijay to discriminate those who he wasn’t interested in and those who he could be interested in just by talking on the telephone. Fortunately, however, many of the women that Vijay had been introduced to lived close by. When this was true, Vijay learned not to spend too much time on the telephone with a woman before asking her to meet in person. This way, unlike with what had happened between him and Megha, he could meet the woman before he had invested too much time getting to know her. Investing that time and becoming friends before meeting someone complicated things in a process that otherwise was meant to be streamlined, mechanical and methodical.

Rocky had once explained to him that the process instituted by their parents, as efficient as it was, lacked a certain sense of romance necessary for the kinds of things that it intended to accomplish. Rather than picking a woman up from her house when on a first date, the parties now agreed to meet at a designated restaurant to avoid having to meet parents and being subjected to uncomfortable post-meeting good byes. Life stories were exchanged via bio-datas, hugs were replaced by handshakes, and marriages were considered more deals that were to be closed after due diligence rather than life-long decisions. After meeting a number of women through this sterile process with no luck, Vijay began to grow tired and frustrated.

To: spatel@georgetown.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: What’s Up?

Rina!

Hey cuz, long time no e-mail! I know I haven’t sent you e-mail in a while, but you know how it is—the folks have me meeting all kinds of random women.

Tell me how your search is going and send e-mail soon.

Vijay To: vpatel@mwe.com From: spatel@georgetown.edu Re: Reply: What’s Up?

hey vijay, nice to hear from you. i was beginning to think you hadn’t e-mailed me because of all of those lawyer jokes I had forwarded to you…my favorite is still—How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?—when his lips move! ;)…haha

I’m not having any more luck than you are when it comes to meeting people!!! my parents keep introducing me to marital prospects, but there isn’t much prospect in the one’s they’re setting me up with if you know what I mean! :(…I’m beginning to get discouraged too.

love your cousin——Rina <3

To: spatel@georgetown.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: What’s Up?

Rina,

It really is too bad we can’t go out with each other because we’re related. I know, that sounds kinda weird to say. But think about it, we would know for sure that our families would get along and talk to each other. You should have seen what had happened to me with the last woman I met! All I said at the end of a less than spectacular date was it was nice to meet her and that I wished her “great success”. By the time this message was translated from English to Gujarati to Hindi, and then back to English, from the woman to her mom to her dad to my dad to me, it had been turned into my being some kinda Indian gigolo wanting to “have great sex”.

I feel like I’m never going to find anyone going through this whole arranged set-up with all the folks involved! Help me!

Vijay

To: vpatel@mwe.com From: spatel@georgetown.edu Re: Reply: What’s Up?

Vijay…I had a thought after reading your last e-mail…I have a lot of single friends and I know you do too…and the only thing everyone ever complains about is that they can’t seem to find anyone…we shouldn’t just count on our parents…we should hook each other up with our friends…what do you think?…Rina

To: spatel@georgetown.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: What’s Up?

Rina,

That sounds like a great idea! My friend Rocky is looking. He’s tall, fair, and handsome (you know the parents wouldn’t like someone tall, DARK and handsome)! What do you say? This way I can kill two single birds with one stone!

Vijay To: spatel@georgetown.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: What’s Up?

Rocky???…did I meet him with you at Amit’s wedding? If it’s the guy I’m thinking of…I don’t think so…

To: spatel@georgetown.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: What’s Up?

Dear Ms. Picky

I was thinking of the same Rocky that you were so it’s a no go. But enough about you—I still haven’t heard of anyone you would be willing to set me up with!

More importantly, I have exciting news! I’ll be in New York for a few days for work next week. Any way you can come down from D.C. to pay a visit over the weekend while I’m there?

I’d love to see you again. Let me know. Vijay

To: vpatel@mwe.com From: spatel@georgetown.edu Re: Reply: What’s Up?

Hey…sorry but I can’t meet up with you in NY…studying for boards has really been killing me…I barely have time to even sleep…I was thinking about our e-mails and there is someone I want you to meet up with while you’re in the city…I met her a month ago in D.C at a party…even though I don’t really know her, she seems really really cool and she’s really really beautiful!…her name is Mona…at the party we had this long talk about meeting guys and we agreed that we should hook each other up like you and I have talked about…After all, it makes sense for people our age to set each other up since we know the truth (dirt)…besides parents can be pretty biased and live life in denial about what their kids are really like…to make a long story short, i decided to take matters into my own hands…i e-mailed her and told her about you and asked if she could show you around…Here’s her e-mail address—drop her a line:

m.patel@nyu.fash.edu

Rina

PS—remember…she’s really pretty!!!

To: spatel@georgetown.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: What’s Up?

Rina!

I can’t believe you’re putting me into the hands of a stranger while I’m in New York! It sounds like you barely even know her! By the way—How pretty is she really? Vijay

To: vpatel@mwe.com From: spatel@georgetown.edu Re: What’s Up?

just e-mail her…i don’t have to be best friends with everyone I hook you up with…be adventurous and take a chance…you have nothing to lose…if you’re going to meet women you don’t know, you might as well do it this way instead of through our folks…bye

To: mpatel@nyu.fash.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: Meeting up in NYC

Hi Mona,

I’m already embarrassed that my cousin Rina has out of nowhere asked if you would meet me while I’m in New York next weekend. I enjoy meeting new people and would love to see you if you are free, but I know this is all a little strange and if you aren’t up to it, I’d understand. Let me know.

Vijay To: vpatel@mwe.com From: mpatel@nyu.fash.edu Re: Reply: Meeting up in NYC

Vijay,

I’m like you and like to meet new people too. If the timing works out, I’d be

happy to show you around! The only reason I mention timing is because there’s an international fashion show in the Village next weekend and some of my school designs are going to be in the show as a part of the South East Asian/Indian showcase. I’m in design school (Has Rina even told you anything about me, because she hasn’t told me anything about you? (But at least that’ll give us something to talk about!)). So it’s great you’re coming up that weekend (that is if you’re interested in seeing this kind of stuff).

But the bad thing is that I’ll probably be stressed out of my mind that week and won’t get to spend too much time with you and I may be less than pleasant company.

If you can deal with a busy and potentially deranged person, I’d love to meet you. Mona

To: mpatel@nyu.fash.edu From: vpatel@wme.com Re: Reply: Meeting up in NYC

Mona,

I think it’d be very cool to meet up with you and see a fashion show. Just let me know the details if you’re sure it’s okay. Thanks again! Vijay

It was Wednesday night and Vijay was packing for his trip to New York. He was flying on the red eye, arriving mid-morning Thursday, and going straight to the office to help close a deal he was working on.

The phone rang. “Hello?” he answered after two rings. He had picked up the cordless phone so that he could continue packing while he talked.

“Vijay? Wow, I finally get a voice!” It was Rocky.

“Sorry I haven’t returned your calls,” Vijay apologized, pulling the zipper around the now shut travel bag. Rocky had called earlier that week to make plans for the coming weekend. “Things have been a little busy at work lately. I’m not going to be able to go out to that party this Saturday because I’ll be in New York meeting a woman named Mona who’s in fashion school,” Vijay said, sitting down on the couch now that all his preparations for the trip were complete.

“Fashion school huh? I bet she’s gorgeous! How do you get so lucky?” Rocky asked enviously.

“Well, she’s studying to be a designer, not a model, so it’s not an automatic that she’s beautiful. That’s what’s kinda scary. I’m doing this pictureless so I don’t even know what she looks like!” Vijay confessed. “All I’ve done is exchanged a couple of e-mails with her.”

“What!? Did you meet her on one of those matrimonial websites?” Rocky exclaimed.

“No, nothing like that!” Vijay replied with a laugh. “My cousin Rina knows her and gave me her e-mail address and introduced us. But wait a minute! Are you telling me there are matrimonial web sites?”

“There are a couple of sites out there,” Rocky answered. “You basically post your bio-data information and a couple of pictures. A ton of single people have put stuff on these sites. If you like someone that you see, you just e-mail them and start a conversation. And the best thing is that there are no parents involved.”

Vijay asked with interest, “So have you taken the time to put your info on these sites?”

“No, I can’t say that I’ve reached that level yet,” admitted Rocky. “Besides, I’m too busy going through my ‘ita’ phase right now.”

“Your ‘ita’ phase?” Vijay asked puzzled.

“You know. The last person I met was Gita. Before that I had met a Mita, Rita, Sangita, and Kavita. You name an ‘ita’ and I’ve probably been set up with her!”

“Wow! You really have met a lot of women, haven’t you?” Vijay exclaimed.

“What can I say? It’s just my luck,” Rocky responded helplessly.

“Well, no offense buddy, but I hope I’m luckier than you,” Vijay said with a goodbye. He hoped that luck would involve New York and Mona.

When Vijay arrived at the airport he was surprised to find the terminal gate crowded with people on the flight bound for New York. He had hoped that the plane would be empty so that he could stretch across three seats and fall asleep. But judging from the length of the line, it looked to be a packed flight.

“What in the world is going on?” a voice from behind him sounded tired and annoyed.

Vijay turned around. His garment bag took a second longer to gain the momentum necessary to make the same turn and took a second longer to stop. As a result, the strap from which the bag was hanging slipped off his shoulder and the whole bag fell to the floor almost making Vijay trip over it. Vijay stood face to face with Valerie, a blond, blue-eyed attorney who worked with him at the firm. She was dressed in baggy sweats carrying a garment bag over one shoulder, holding a leather litigation bag with both her hands, and wearing a frown realizing, no doubt like Vijay had, that sleeping on the flight would practically be impossible.

“From what I can tell, the flight before this was cancelled and so all those people got bumped onto our flight,” he explained to her with a sigh.

After waiting in line for twenty minutes, they received their boarding passes and walked through the gate entrance and boarded the plane. After stowing their bags in the overhead compartment they sat down in their seats. Both of them were giddy now from being so tired.

“I’m so exhausted but I can’t sleep like this.” Valerie squirmed uncomfortably in her seat after the plane took off. She fiddled with the recline button but obtained very little comfort from what it had to offer. Vijay put his tray down and rested his head on it. That wasn’t working either.

“Are you staying around in the city through the weekend?” Vijay asked to make conversation, resigned to the fact that he would be awake for a while.

“Yes. I met this one guy who’s an investment banker on my last flight to New York. I called him up and offered to let him take me out on the town,” she said, sounding as though she was being magnanimous by giving the guy the opportunity. That was typical of Valerie.

“Do you even like him?” asked Vijay critically.

“Geographically undesirable,” she wrote him off without a second’s thought. “But that doesn’t mean he can’t treat me to a nice time this weekend, does it?” she asked coquettishly.

“It’s women like you that drive nice guys like me crazy!” Vijay complained. Valerie was attractive and enjoyed having men follow her around like lovesick teenagers. She and Vijay had a history of animated discussions about her living by the “Rules,” which entailed her playing games and treating men badly which in some deranged way made her more desirable to these same men. Vijay, of course, took the side of and pleaded for the men in Valerie’s life who were foolish enough to lose all of their self-respect despite how she treated them.

“What about you?” she ignored his diatribe and continued the conversation after the stewardess brought their drinks. “Are you sticking around in the city for another one of your arranged marriage blind dates?” she asked teasingly, having heard his stories of the numerous women he had been meeting through the matrimonial process.

“I am,” Vijay admitted.

“You and your marriage rush,” she said with disapproval, looking as if she almost wanted to shake some sense into him. Valerie was the quintessential single woman and the arranged marriage process was very much a foreign concept to her. “I keep telling you, once you’re married, you miss out on all the benefits of being single, and I’m not just talking about going out to parties and dating lots of different women. If we get a great job opportunity tomorrow morning that’s in Europe, we wouldn’t have to think twice about it. We could just go because we’re single! You’ve got tons of years to experience the married life ahead of you, why do you want to sacrifice your few remaining single years for that?”

“I understand what you’re saying,” Vijay responded, “but did you ever stop to think that by extending your single experience you might be sacrificing your married experience?” Seeing that Valerie didn’t believe what Vijay was saying could possibly be true, he said “Here, I’ll give you an example of what I’m talking about.” He took out a pen and some paper from his computer bag. “I’m just gonna ask you some questions and let’s see if we can figure some things out.”

“Go ahead,” she challenged him.

“Okay, to start off, when you’re married do you think you’ll want a family?” he asked her.

She laughed at how quickly Vijay had gotten to serious life topics, answering, “Definitely.”

“When’s the latest you think you would want to have a kid?”

“I don’t want to be so old that I’m on Social Security when my kids go to college and I don’t want a high risk pregnancy. So let’s say…thirty five,” Valerie thought out loud.

“How many kids do you think you want to have?”

“Two.”

“How much older will the older kid be than the younger kid?”

“I don’t know, maybe two years apart to give me some breathing room. What’s the point of all this?” she asked, mildly annoyed now. The lack of sleep was taking its toll on her.

“Don’t worry,” Vijay said while writing down her responses on the paper in front of him. “You’ll see. How long do you think you and your husband will be just a married couple before you have kids?”

“From what I hear, you don’t get to go out as much once you have kids. So I’ll want to have some time to enjoy life with my husband before we go down that road. You know, so that we can travel and throw dinner parties and do all that kind of stuff.”

“Of course. So you think you’d be married for two years before you had your first kid?” he asked leadingly, to quicken the likelihood of getting an answer out of her.

“Yes, I think that’s right if I was planning things,” she laughed at the thought of plotting out her life so far in advance.

Vijay made more notes on the paper. “Okay. So how long do you think you’ll be engaged to your husband before you get married?”

“I would need lots of time to prepare for the wedding. But let’s be reasonable. I think I would like a one year engagement.”

“And how long do you think you’ll know the guy before he works up the nerve to ask you to marry him?”

She closed her eyes and answered, “Unlike you, I’m not going to rush into a big decision like that. But let’s be ultra aggressive and say six months just for the fun of it. We’ll call it love at first sight!” she made fun of him and his feelings about that concept.

Vijay ignored her jab and continued, “Is there any guy you’re seeing that you think could be the guy that you end up spending the rest of your life with?”

“No, not right now,” she said with a sigh.

“So what are you saying? Do you think it’s possible that in the next year you’ll meet the guy that someday will end up marrying you?”

“If I had to guess right now, I don’t see that happening. But maybe. Okay, again let’s be aggressive and say this year I meet the guy who I end up marrying. Oh! This is so exciting!” Valerie pretended to be excited. “I’m meeting my husband soon!”

Vijay continued to ignore her theatrics. He did some calculations based on the answers Valerie provided. He then looked at her and confirmed, “So you agree that all of this is reasonable, if not conservative? I mean, in order to have the full married life with kids experience, this is how everything should play out, right?”

“Yes,” she agreed.

“Well, according to what you’ve told me, you should meet, or rather bump into, the guy that you will be marrying when you’re twenty eight years old. That is, of course, if you don’t want to miss out on anything as a married person.”

“But, Vijay, I’m already thirty years old,” she didn’t quite understand Vijay’s point.

“I know,” Vijay said gently. “I’m just saying that if you wanted your life to go along the plan you had just described to me, you would have already been married for a year by now.”

Valerie stopped short and pressed against her seat deep in thought as the point finally hit home.

“What I was saying before was that I agree you may have gotten to do some more things as a single person by not getting married so early. But well, here is where maybe you may have given up on some things in your future married life because of that.”

“I guess I never bothered to think about it like that,” she said quietly, slightly disturbed at having missed what ramifications might arise based on her present outlook on life.

“Now do you understand why I don’t feel like I’m giving up on all this fun being single for nothing? I’m just trading it in for a new kind of married fun,” Vijay said in a sleepy tone, resting his head back on the tray, sleep overcoming him. As he drifted off, his head on one side, he could see Valerie deep in thought, mentally working the numbers in her mind over and over again, nowhere near as close to going to sleep as he was.

After Vijay and Valerie’s flight landed, they went to the hotel to change and then left to go straight to the office to work until two in the morning. Vijay felt like a zombie, having not closed his eyes for over thirty hours straight. After returning back to the hotel for a few hours of sleep, they went back to the office at five in the morning on Friday. Although very tired, the prospect of finishing early seemed definite now and gave them renewed energy. By lunchtime the deal had closed and their work was done.

Back at the hotel, Vijay fell asleep immediately upon entering his room, the time change and lack of rest having had a powerful combined effect on him. Before he knew it, he woke up with a start having slept the entire afternoon.

After lying in bed for a while, he went into the bathroom to prepare for his date with Mona that evening. As he stood in front of the mirror getting ready he realized he didn’t feel nervous at all. It was very different than when he was meeting any of the women that his parents had set him up with. Maybe it was because this was just a casual date, like dates were meant to be in a normal world. There were no immediate implications of marriage tied to this meeting and there was no reporting back to parents that would be necessary. Vijay pulled out a printed e-mail from Mona with her address from his briefcase and put it in his pocket. He went downstairs after showering and hailed a cab, giving the driver the address to Mona’s apartment.

After a twenty-minute ride through traffic, the cab driver dropped Vijay off in Greenwich Village in front of Mona’s apartment building. The building was very impressive and all Vijay could think of when he saw it was that this was a place that even Valerie could live in luxury with men at her beck and call. He went through the front doors held open by a uniformed doorman to meet a security guard sitting behind a counter. The lobby was expensively furnished with leather designer chairs and a large array of orchids placed on a center table.

“Hi, I’m here to visit Mona Patel in 302,” Vijay said. He looked at his watch. It read 6:37. They had made plans to meet her at her place at 6:30. A few seconds passed as the security guard called up to Mona’s apartment.

The security guard put the phone down and looked up at Vijay. “I’m sorry sir, but nobody’s answering.”

“I do have the right place don’t I?” asked Vijay. “Is there a Mona Patel that lives there?”

“You’ve got the right place,” the security guard confirmed. “But I haven’t seen her since this afternoon when she left with some gentleman. Is she expecting you?”

“I thought so,” Vijay said with a sigh. He then sat in the lobby waiting for her as there was nothing close by to walk to outside. To his dismay, there weren’t even any magazines for him to occupy his time, no doubt a measure maintained by the building office to keep stragglers from staying too long. After an hour had passed by, he angrily thought to himself, where could she be? He had come all this way from California and was stuck sitting in a lobby waiting for her while the security guard and doorman no doubt were laughing at him! There appeared to be no explanation other than the one Valerie told to him once about when she met guys. “According to the Rules, the girl, even if she’s ready, has got to keep the guy waiting and expecting, especially when they meet for the first time.” He began to wonder if Mona was reading from the same book of Rules that Valerie did.

He looked at his watch for what must have been the hundredth time. It was now approaching 8:00. Mona was over an hour and a half late from when she had said she would be in. Now fully angry at himself for waiting that long and also at the idea of having been stood up without warning, he decided to cut his losses and leave.

He proceeded to walk around the Village full of anger and self-pity. After eating a slice of cheese pizza for dinner on a park bench, he decided that the night had effectively been wasted and returned to the hotel in a bad mood. Getting out of his cab at the front entrance, he saw Valerie next to a Porsche saying good-bye to the driver. She just waved good-bye. There was no kiss, no hug, not even a handshake. Without saying a word Vijay followed Valerie through the doors of the hotel.

“Hey Val,” Vijay said as he caught up to her inside the lobby.

Valerie turned around in surprise. “You scared me! What are you doing here? It’s not even ten yet!”

“Yeah, I can say the same to you too. I thought you were going to paint the town red tonight? What happened?”

“Let’s just say it was one of those nights,” she said with a sigh.

Vijay, sensing things didn’t go well on her date either, asked, “Since we’ve both come back too early to be good, do you want to go to the hotel bar and at least have a drink to commiserate?”

She agreed, and they walked into the hotel bar and ordered two Manhattans for no other reason than besides it felt like the right drink to order in Manhattan.

“So, tell me about your date,” Vijay asked after the bartender had served them.

“Brad’s really nice and all, but well, he just doesn’t…,” she was searching for the right words to finish the sentence.

“Start your motor? rev your engine? turn your crank?” Vijay offered, trying to help her finish her sentence with a smile.

“Yeah, yeah, thanks for your help! But you’re right,” she admitted with a shrug of her shoulders and a big sip of her drink. “He wasn’t someone I felt excited about being with, and I knew that. But I thought what harm would it do to let him take me out tonight?” she asked rhetorically.

“So, what happened?” Vijay asked curious.

“We went to this great restaurant for dinner and while we were waiting at the bar for our table to get ready, I stood next to this really amazing new guy. I just had this feeling of intense attraction towards him, and I don’t get that feeling often! We looked at each other a couple of times and I just knew he wanted to talk to me. Vijay, he could have been the one. You know, the guy that I bump into and get married to within a year!” she referred back to their conversation on the airplane.

“So, did you get his name or anything?”

“That’s the problem! I couldn’t because I was there with Brad!” she let out, patiently explaining the obvious situation to him. “It was then that I realized the perfect person could walk by me and I wouldn’t even be able to do anything because I was with the wrong guy just having fun. After that realization, I didn’t feel like going out after dinner anymore,” she said with a sigh, “so I just cut my losses.”

Vijay shrugged, sorry to have heard her night didn’t go as planned but also happy that perhaps in the long run, the lesson learned tonight might be a good one for Valerie.

But wait a minute!” she broke out of her despondency, “That explains why I’m back here, what about you?” she took another sip of her drink.

“She never showed,” he offered as a short explanation.

“What?” Valerie said surprised. “You sure she wasn’t just being late like I usually am? Building up anticipation? You know, like the Rules require?”

“Well, if she was reading your book of Rules, she has the hard cover edition, because I waited over an hour and a half and she still didn’t show!”

“An hour and a half?” Valerie repeated in awe, almost as if it was a compliment to Mona to get a man to wait that long for her. “She didn’t explain why she wasn’t there?”

“No. There was no note or anything. I could have done something else and not wasted my time,” Vijay said bitterly.

“Did you check with the hotel? She might have left a message telling you she had cancelled.”

As soon as Valerie said that, Vijay realized with dismay that he had never given Mona a number to reach him if the plan changed. “Oh no!” Vijay groaned and dropped his head on the table. “I can’t believe that I didn’t tell her how to get a hold of me! Sometimes I can be such a…”

“Dummy? idiot? stupid person?” it was Valerie’s turn to help Vijay finish his sentence.

“I’d better go and give her a call,” he said as they both stood up to leave. He no longer felt as negatively towards Mona as he had before realizing his mistake.

Valerie, however, hoped only for the worst for Vijay in a way that only Valerie could. “I hope this Mona person has an excuse for why she couldn’t make it, but you know me and how I am with the Rules,” she grinned mischievously, “The weaker her excuse is, the more I’ll probably respect her!”

“Oh brother!” Vijay groaned. “Just what I need! To meet someone who thinks like you!” he said to her in the elevator waving goodbye as the doors opened onto his floor.

Vijay entered his room and then sighed at the imperfect plans he had made with Mona. He pulled out Mona’s phone number and dialed. The phone rang three times and her answering machine picked up. Evidently, she still wasn’t home.

Vijay left a message, “Mona, this is Vijay. I waited for you but you never showed up. I hope everything is okay and nothing serious happened. Give me a call at the Plaza Hotel. I’m in room 1910. Bye.”

After leaving the message, he changed his clothes and went to bed, still upset, although now more at himself, for having wasted his first free night in New York.

The phone rang to wake him. Vijay looked at the clock next to the bed. It read 1:26. He had been sleeping for over an hour. “Hello?” he answered in the darkness.

“Hi, it’s Mona. I’m so sorry about tonight. I’m sorry about everything.” She blurted out her apologies all at once.

“What happened?” he slowly woke up.

“Something really important,” she answered. Vijay’s hopes were revived at the confirmation that she had a good reason for abandoning him. This feeling, however, was short lived. “At the last minute,” she continued, “I had to go with someone to some party to talk about my designs.”

Upon hearing her explanation, he paused to let the message sink in. He then became angry at the thought that a party had taken precedence over her meeting him. If it were an illness, an accident or similar tragedy worthy of standing him up, he might of understood. But a party? He began to feel that Mona was no different than Valerie, each of them treating the men in their lives without any consideration in accordance with the “Rules” so that they were drawn even closer to them. This thought angered him and he vowed to himself not to fall into such a trap.

“Believe me, though!” she said, perhaps realizing that going to a party might not have sounded like a credible excuse, “It really was important that I went, I had no choice! I wanted to call to let you know so that you could make other plans but I didn’t have a number to reach you,” she paused to further gauge his mood and then continued, “Can we try again and meet tomorrow so that I can make it up to you?”

“I don’t know…” Vijay said, still bristling at the thought that he had been stood up by Mona for no good excuse. “When you didn’t show up, I met up with someone else for drinks. She and I are planning to do something tomorrow,” he partially lied in the hopes of making it sound like his night was not a pathetic loss and that he might have better fish to fry. He desperately wanted to teach Mona a lesson.

“Oh,” she said quietly. “Well, let me know if your plans change. It would be nice to meet you since you’re all the way out here,” her voice trailed off.

Vijay paused for a second to think. He very much wanted to hand her a dose of her own medicine. He wasn’t quite sure how he would do that yet, but having been trained through his friendship with Valerie, he felt like he could surely withstand the likes of Mona and score a victory for men. Just as there was a book of “Rules” for women, Valerie had told him about the “Code”, which was the corresponding version for men. Here was his chance to put the Code to the test.

“You know what? I promised Valerie I’d take her shopping,” he intimated again about his “friend” from the night before giving her a name to add to the story, “but I’m sure we could meet up early in the morning before she gets up.”

“Great! There’s a bookstore right on the corner of the main square in the Village off of Broadway and 12th. It’s called the Strand Bookstore. How about meeting inside at 9:30?” she offered. She then followed it with a “It’ll be nice to meet you finally.”

“Okay,” Vijay complied and agreed. He then hung up the phone gently. He would get a second chance to meet Mona in person and was resolute in wanting to show her who was in control. He quickly called the front desk to have a wake-up call placed for eight that morning and lay down to fall asleep. Yes, he thought to himself with a Machiavellian smile in the dark, tomorrow was going to be a very eventful day. Mona would learn that he was not one to mess with.

“Valerie, good morning,” Vijay said softly in the hopes that she wouldn’t complain about his calling so early. It was a little past nine and he had already showered and was preparing to leave to meet Mona.

“Vijay?” her voice groaned on the phone in reply.

“I’m sorry that I woke you up,” Vijay said, “but I just had to talk to you before I left. Mona ended up calling me last night.”

“Uh huh,” she mumbled, still sounding drowsy.

“We talked a bit and she apologized for canceling,” Vijay offered, in the hopes of justifying her waking up to talk to him.

Valerie mumbled, “And…how good was it?”

“What? Her apology?” Vijay asked, not certain to what Valerie was referring.

“No, her excuse,” she groaned, having to spell it out for him. “Why didn’t she meet you last night?” She was only interested in how Mona played the game.

“To be honest, her excuse was kinda weak,” Vijay admitted. “She said she couldn’t meet me because she had to go to some party for the fashion show!”

Valerie showed signs of alertness, approving of Mona’s excuse in a way that only Valerie could. “An emergency fashion design party!” she laughed. “Not the best of excuses, but that’s why I’m beginning to like her already!”

“Yeah, well your liking her makes me even more sure she’s trouble!” Vijay grumbled. “But anyways, she wants to try and see me today to make up for last night. That’s why I was calling you.”

“Tell her you’re too busy and that you can’t meet her,” Valerie counseled.

“No, I already told her I’d meet her this morning in the Village,” Vijay replied.

“Wait a minute!” Valerie interrupted emphatically. “This woman, what’s her name? Mona? She stood you up because she had to go to some party and you’re now going to go crawling back to meet her? What’s going on? I thought you championed the cause against being the spineless man!”

“I don’t know,” Vijay said evasively. “There’s a part of me that just wants to meet her face to face. To see who it was that stood me up.”

“That’s not it, is it?” she asked in disbelief, then paused for a moment, almost as if her mind was whirring away trying to assemble the data so that it came out in a coherent pattern. “I know what you’re doing,” she said in a flash of realization, “You’re still a little mad at her, aren’t you? You want to teach her a lesson!”

“Well,” Vijay’s voice trailed off, signaling that she may have hit upon the truth.

“I just have one question,” Valerie said.

“What’s that?” Vijay asked.

“How can I help?”

Vijay laced his Nike running shoes and put on a baseball cap. He wasn’t dressing up for his meeting with Mona because it was all part of this game that he was now committed to playing after speaking with Valerie. Valerie instructed him to dress in a very casual way to emphasize he put no special significance in his meeting with Mona.

Feeling adventurous and wanting to be late, at Valerie’s insistence, he decided to take the subway instead of a cab. He got off the subway at the West 4th Street station and walked through the heart of the Village to the bookstore Mona had mentioned, looking at his watch as he stepped inside. It was well past the time that they were supposed to meet. Once inside, he didn’t see Mona immediately. He wondered if he could figure out where she might be based on his few conversations with her. Thinking of her fashion design background, he walked up a spiral staircase to the second floor and headed towards the Art Sections.

Once up on the second floor, he consciously read the subject headings for each aisle. The third shelf on his right was labeled architecture and design. Vijay had a feeling that this would be where he would find her. The aisle had tall bookshelves to the left and right. It did not come to a dead end, however, as a bookshelf along the far wall faced the ends of the side bookshelves, creating another aisle perpendicular to the one he had entered. Standing in front of this far bookshelf with her back facing him, he saw a woman poring intently over a book. Although he couldn’t see the woman’s face, for some unknown reason he knew that it was Mona.

She hadn’t heard or seen him and was concentrating intently on the book in her hands. Vijay quietly walked down the aisle, noticing her clothes. She wore an all white sheer dress, which added a sense of coolness to a day that was proving to be a warm one in the city. Her hair was no longer than shoulder length and shined and flowed as smoothly as the lines of her clothing, giving her an air of quiet sophistication.

Halfway down the aisle, he paused, but for a second, puzzled. For some reason, he had the sense that he was about to meet someone incredibly special. Although she had not turned around, he was already strongly attracted to her despite his concerted efforts not to be. How could this all be happening when he hadn’t even met her yet let alone seen her up front? He shook his head to try and make sense of it all, yet his heart began to beat quicker. And then, all thoughts of the game, acting nonchalant, and wanting to teach Mona a lesson slowly began to evaporate, despite his panicked attempts to focus and hold on. These thoughts were replaced by a vision of fireworks to come, not yet exploded, having just been launched from the cannon into the night sky. He was certain, however, that something special was about to reveal itself.

The woman sensed someone was approaching and slowly turned to look at him. Vijay first saw her profile and knew that he was right. She was beautiful. And those fireworks that he wondered so much about when he had first met Megha, they did exist. As she turned to face him, having heard him approach, the fireworks did explode for a second. But then, just as they blossomed into something amazing, they froze, as if the whole sequence were on pause. As he looked at this woman that he was immediately and inexplicably attracted to despite his best efforts, he realized this wasn’t the first time that he had seen her. He had seen her before at a party two years back. There stood Mona in front of him. But he knew her as the infamous Madame Ex.

8

Let the Games Begin

“Hi, Mona?” Vijay asked to confirm. It took all of his mental strength not to say Madame-Ex out loud. The woman who was alleged to have led men around, breaking their hearts and then searching for new blood stood right in front of him, perhaps looking at him as her next victim. He swore to himself then and there that he would not let that happen as the visions of firework were quickly erased from his mind.

“Vijay?” she responded slowly with a nod. “It’s nice to put a face to an e-mail. I’m sorry that I’m late,” he apologized half-heartedly.

“Oh, that’s okay,” she responded brightly, taking the apology for its face value. “I can’t complain after what I did to you yesterday. I’m just glad you still decided to meet me!”

Vijay laughed slightly in response, still reeling from the fact that Mona was Madame Ex. But then he thought about it some more and it all made sense. After all, who else but someone like her would stand him up after he had traveled across the country just so she could go to a party?

They left the bookstore and walked to Café Reggio, a small NYU student frequented coffeehouse a few blocks away that boasted the first cappuccino maker ever used in America over a hundred years ago. Vijay looked at her across from their table and thought to himself that it was important more than ever to play the game properly because he was dealing with a professional player. Fortunately, Valerie, a professional herself, had given him a crash course earlier that morning. The first step, he repeated to himself, was to tell Mona that he only had a little time to talk because he still had other, impliedly better, things to do during the day.

“Vijay, I hate to say this, especially after last night, but I can only talk for a bit before I have to go back to the fashion show to get things ready. I just felt, especially after what happened last night, that I had to at least see you,” she said to him before he could even get his line out. He grimaced, angry at himself for having been beaten to the opening punch.

“No problem. I’ve got other things to do too,” he tried to counter-punch. It was too little too late, and he knew it. He had already lost the opening round of the game.

“I still feel so bad about not meeting up with you last night,” she shook her head.

Vijay didn’t believe her. “Don’t worry about it, everything worked out for the best because I ended up meeting someone else,” he tried to give off the impression that she wasn’t even missed. Score one point for him. “I’m curious though. What happened to you?”

“I was with my friend working last night putting the finishing touches on the models. You see, my friend applies mehndi patterns on the models that match with my clothing designs. And before I knew what was happening, a writer from a local fashion magazine showed up to do a little piece on the show and saw what Anusha and I were doing. He asked to interview us for a side story about the show.”

“That’s good, right?”

“It’s so good I can’t even tell you! But it all happened so last minute, and in order to do it, we had to go with the writer to a pre-party he had to attend as a part of today’s show in order to finish the interview. And even though I know it wasn’t right to leave you in the lurch like I did, I just didn’t know what else I could do. I hope you understand?” she asked in a manner from which to try and coax a “sure I understand” out of Vijay.

“Sure, I understand,” Vijay complied, and added a “Don’t think twice about it,” for good measure. The story sounded plausible and he could see himself making the same decision she had made had their roles been reversed. But after he thought about it some more, he reminded himself that he was dealing with Madame Ex. Because of that, he couldn’t bring his guard down so easily, despite her excuse sounding much better now than it had earlier that morning when he had repeated it to Valerie.

“So tell me, did you always want to be a fashion designer?” asked Vijay, curious, changing slightly the course of the conversation.

“I guess I’ve always been interested in being a designer,” she admitted. “I’ve always pictured myself as a creative person, even when I was an electrical engineer.”

“You’re kidding me!” Vijay’s laugh came out sudden at the unexpected news. “I’m sorry, but I just can’t see it. You? An engineer?” he said, shaking his head.

“Let’s just say, deep inside, I didn’t think engineering was for me either,” she responded to his laughter with a smile. “But it was the standard Indian parent thing,” she responded with a roll of her eyes.

Vijay understood very well how a career in design would not necessarily have resulted in equal approval from Indian parents as would a career in engineering. “But what gave you the courage to make the change? I think now and then about ‘redefining’ myself and maybe becoming a writer or something equally as creative, but I don’t have the guts to do it like you seem to have been able to.”

She answered with a heavy sigh, “Let’s just say that a few years ago I came very close to making the biggest mistake ever. I was lucky and was able to get out of it, but in the process I realized there were a lot of things that I wasn’t happy about in my life. I was doing things because other people wanted me to, not because I wanted to. So when all this happened, I took stock in life and started doing things for me to be happy, like trying to be a designer.”

Her comment piqued his interest. Surely that life defining moment related to when she almost had married Jayesh. He wanted to somehow pursue it further, perhaps, he thought with a smirk, asking her where she kept the engagement ring Jayesh had given her. But before he could say another word, she let out, having glanced at her watch, “Oh my god, it’s been over an hour! I’m running late! I’m sorry, but I’ve got to go!” She rose abruptly from her chair, collecting her things.

Vijay, too, had lost track of time during their talk, having become engrossed in their discussions. He had also temporarily forgotten the purpose of his agreeing to meet her again—to play the game like she did. All in all, he had not fared well. She was now the one leaving, controlling when the meeting was over. Valerie would have scored this as a total defeat for him.

As Mona pulled her bag onto the chair, she opened it and took an envelope out and gave it to Vijay. “It’s an invitation to the fashion show. If you can make it…” she asked with a hopeful look.

“I’ll try.” Vijay said, only promising to “try” because that’s what Valerie would have wanted him to say. With a sudden inspiration, he went for broke, asking “Is it okay if I bring someone?” If he could bring Valerie as his escort, he would surely score a win in the game.

“Of course!” she stood up, not knowing the firepower this allowed Vijay to bring with him. She then said, “It was really nice to meet you and I hope I see you later today.”

“I’m sure we’ll see each other,” Vijay promised, rising to say goodbye. After a quick hug, she was gone. Vijay sat back down for a while collecting his thoughts after Mona had left. Madame Ex. Mona. What were the odds? He sighed, rubbing his temples, wondering whether he had a more shocked look on his face when he first met Rina as Shinki or Madame Ex as Mona. Either way, it was getting to be a little too much. He stood up, pushed his and Mona’s chair in, returned the now half-empty cups, and walked back to the subway station to report back to Valerie at the hotel. Despite his intentions going into this meeting, he had, if anything, fallen further behind in the game. But, as he looked at the invitation in his hand, he realized the game was not yet lost.

It was close to one o’clock when Vijay returned to the hotel. Valerie, impatient as always, had already left two messages.

“Valerie? Hi, it’s me,” he returned her phone call.

“Hello! I’ve been waiting for your call! So tell me!” she cut to the chase. “How’d we do with Operation Game Control?” In the course of the morning, she had already personalized his meeting with Mona to involve the both of them.

“Let’s just say that if I ever thought you were trouble, you have nothing on her!” He then went on to explain how Mona played the game very well and how she was someone he already descriptively knew as the infamous Madame Ex.

“Wow, this is like wrestling and I feel left out because I don’t even have a nickname!” she laughed. “I really want to meet this woman now after all you’ve said about her. She sounds like a worthy adversary!”

“Well,” Vijay said, opening the invitation in his hand, “there a fashion show this afternoon. I’m hoping that if you come with me, she’ll realize she can’t just push me around!”

Vijay put on a white shirt and a linen suit. Appropriate attire he said to himself given the hot weather and according to what he had read in GQ last week. After doing a complete circle in front of the mirror to make sure all looked like it was supposed to, he went downstairs and met up with Valerie. She was wearing a short and sheer summer dress with sunglasses on even though she was still inside the hotel lobby. Vijay could tell that she had her “game” face on.

They took a taxi into the Village. As they were riding, Vijay said, “I really appreciate your coming with me like this Valerie.”

“Please,” she disregarded his thanks, “I wouldn’t have it any other way! After all, we’re friends. I can’t let some other woman treat you like I treat other men!”

Vijay just shook his head wondering what he had gotten himself into. But there was no stopping Valerie now.

They arrived at Washington Square, a park located in the heart of the Village. A large part of the square had been fenced in with a security entrance at the front. They were let in after Vijay presented the card that Mona had given to him to the person standing by the entrance. A large white-canopied tent was set up in the middle of the fenced in area and intermittent applause could be heard from within.

Once seated inside, Vijay looked around. Raised in the middle of the tent was a runway with photographers flanked on either side. When they had entered they had each been given a program listing the schedule of showings. At this time a skinny male designer was at the microphone talking about what the models were wearing as they walked up and down the runway. Flashes were going off in staccato patterns as the models did their turn on the catwalk.

After a few minutes, Valerie asked “Is that her?” She pointed to Mona who had replaced the previous designer at the podium. She looked even more radiant on stage. Evidently, it was her turn now.

No sooner had Vijay nodded confirmation to Valerie that Mona’s segment began. On cue, the lights in the tent which had become bright after the last designer had finished, were dimmed. Sedate sitar and flute music began to play in a languorous tune.

“When India and fashion comes to mind,” Mona enunciated very properly and clearly, “one might have visions of women in rather plain cotton saris covering much of their bodies. I am here to show to you, however, that it is much more with much less!”

With that, the lights went out completely, and a spotlight pierced the darkness focusing on the runway. The soft Indian music was replaced by an up-beat bhangra beat that could have just as easily been playing late at night in one of the dance clubs in Manhattan. Mona’s electrifying stage direction and her designs set the room on fire as even the most staid viewers sat upright having had their senses jolted to attention. The models then came out one at a time showcasing Mona’s designs. Her style, she explained, used as a starting point what was standard Indian fashion for hundreds of years. The models walked down the runway wearing elaborately woven fabrics with multi-colored hues. One outfit with tiny mirrors sewn in an elaborate pattern made the model wearing it look like a walking disco ball as the outfit sprayed back in thousands of directions the light thrown from the spotlight. Whether or not the outfit itself was appreciated was immaterial. The audience was dazzled by the spectacle.

Vijay definitely approved, and it had appeared to him, judging from the reaction of the crowd, that they agreed. Although it wasn’t like the home shopping network where a solid measurement of appreciation could be seen based on the number of items sold flashing in the corner of a screen, Vijay could tell the crowd was excited about what they were seeing.

Each of the models was attractive and, in addition to wearing revealing outfits, had delicate mehndi designs on their hands and, on some, around their ankles and arms. The designs drawn onto the bodies complemented the outfits that each model wore. Vijay could just see affluent fashion conscious women, in their constant attempts to outdo each other, having their own personal mehndi designer draw patterns matching their outfits in “one of a kind” fashion.

After the show was finished, Vijay and Valerie walked through to the back to meet with Mona. “Operation Game Control is about to start,” Valerie said wrapping her arm around his arm as they approached her.

“Hi Mona, that was a great show!” Vijay said, suddenly cognizant of Valerie’s arm when he tried to hug Mona.

Mona answered with a “Thanks! It means a lot that you came, really.” She was flush with excitement, no doubt feeling that her segment was as much a success as Vijay thought it was.

“Are you kidding? We wouldn’t have missed this for anything!” Valerie said as a way of introducing herself as a part of Vijay. The need for Valerie to emphasize this, however, was superfluous. It not only was very apparent based on how Valerie was acting, but also by Mona’s reaction when they had approached her. Vijay could almost hear Mona say to herself “so this is the person that Vijay was talking about.”

“Mona, this is Valerie,” Vijay introduced Valerie to Mona with a smile of confidence. He felt the tide of control had turned in his favor now.

“Hi, so nice to meet you,” Mona extended a hand of greeting. “So, what did you think? Did you like my designs?” Mona asked them.

“I was just telling Vijay,” Valerie said looking at him rather than Mona, with a smile, “that your designs were amazing!”

“I agree,” Vijay said. “And those models you picked!” he continued, “They sure had the body to show the clothes off! I was just thinking that it was a good thing you didn’t use a bunch of old out of shape aunties. That could have gotten ugly!”

Mona laughed at that and then they all stood there in silence. Mona, perhaps feeling a little awkward being the third person and Valerie loving it because Mona was feeling awkward. Mona was saved, however, as one of the organizers came by and asked her to join the other designers for some group pictures that they wanted to take.

“I’m so sorry,” Mona said to them, “but I’ve got to go do this. Are you two going to be here for a while?” she intimated for the three of them to get together later.

“No, probably not,” Valerie said, looking first to Vijay to indicate that she was answering for both of them. Evidently, she felt that they had accomplished what they had set out to. “Mona, you’re going to be busy for a while and we shouldn’t be bothering you!” Vijay tried not to look too surprised at how Valerie was spinning out their “relationship.”

Vijay turned to Mona, having received his cue from Valerie, and said, “Well, it’s too bad we couldn’t talk more.”

“I know. I’m sorry, with this whole fashion show and everything, it really did make things a little tough,” Mona apologized. “I’d like to talk more later. Become better friends…” she trailed off.

“Maybe next time,” Vijay said with a shrug.

“Mona!” the organizer persisted in calling her away.

“I’ve got to go,” she said. “Is it all right if I call you when things calm down?” she asked.

“I’d like that very much,” Vijay said. They then separated, probably forever. Valerie told him that Mona was likely not the kind of woman who would call Vijay because the Rules didn’t allow for such a transgression. Valerie then added that this was probably best for him because he was walking away the winner.

After Mona left to have her picture taken, Vijay and Valerie exited the park and decided to walk back to their hotel. Vijay said with a tired sigh, “After the last few months, I’ve finally realized that this whole arranged meeting thing is a lot tougher than I ever thought it would be.”

“Oh, shut up!” Valerie said, not willing to tolerate any of his whining. “To start with, it’s dumb for you to even have thought that it would be easy. I mean we’re talking about big-time decisions here. Of course it’s going to be hard!”

“I don’t know,” Vijay couldn’t entirely agree with what she was saying. “If you were Indian, I bet it wouldn’t be hard for you at all!” he said while looking up at the city skyline while walking. “You’d have a line of guys wanting to marry you.”

“You keep forgetting something important!” she shook him to get his attention. “This whole thing you’re going through is not just about having a whole bunch of people liking you. It’s more about having that one right person love you. For that to happen, it’s just as hard for anyone, including me. So stop thinking you’re the only one that hasn’t found their soul mate after only a few months of looking,” Valerie said forcefully, trying to set him straight. “Can I give you some advice though?” she asked as they stood on a corner waiting for the light to change. “Just because you’re looking doesn’t mean you should stop living.”

“What do you mean by that?” Vijay asked.

“I just sometimes worry that you get so wrapped up with this whole finding a wife thing and wondering when it’ll happen, that you don’t realize how great you have it now. So just remember, as much as it’ll be great that day when you meet that someone special, it’s also great now while we’re single and looking. So make sure you enjoy it!”

9

Little Facts

His alarm clock kept ringing the morning after coming back from New York and Vijay finally relented. He groggily headed to the bathroom to take a shower, leaving the alarm to shrill for no one in particular except the next-door neighbor who could probably hear it through the bedroom wall. Served him right, thought Vijay grumpily. His neighbor often watched television with the volume up late at nights while Vijay tried to sleep.

After getting ready, he drove to his office in Century City. He took the elevator to the 34th floor, walked into his office, and looked at the yellow post-its that he had stuck to the side of his computer monitor to remind him of things to do. He pulled one of the post-its off. It read “Call M re: 28 on 8/8.” His face broke out in a smile of remembrance.

He looked at his watch. It was 7:12 a.m. He opened one of the desk drawers and pulled out his address book. After flipping through some pages, he looked up a number and dialed the telephone. A woman’s voice answered.

Vijay smiled again when he heard the familiar voice. “Hi. It’s Vijay. How are you?” he asked.

“What a surprise! To what do I owe this pleasure?” It was Megha.

“Just wanted to call to wish you a happy birthday. Besides, I thought we promised that we would try to keep in touch,” he said. Of all the women that Vijay had been introduced to in the last year, Megha still stood out as the one woman with whom he genuinely had become friends. He always hoped, despite the nature of their introduction, that they could maintain that friendship even after they continued on in their own respective searches.

“I appreciate the call,” she admitted with sincerity. “It’s nice to hear a friendly voice wishing me a happy birthday that’s not in a tone of ‘you’re getting older and you’re still single!’“

Vijay laughed. “So I take it that there isn’t a Mr. Right in your life yet?”

“Not yet,” she admitted. “How about you? Any luck?”

“No,” Vijay admitted. “I guess you kinda spoiled me. I expected everyone to be normal, but so far there’s just been so much drama with everyone I’ve met.”

“Don’t even get me started about drama!” Megha said, evidently having been subjected to an arranged dating ordeal recently.

“Why, what happened?” Vijay asked. It was always entertaining to hear what others were going through during the process in order to put things in perspective.

“I was introduced by my folks to this guy named Niraj who at first seemed great. He was doing his residency at Duke but he was always took the time to visit me in Charlotte, which is not exactly close by. After about two months I asked him how he was able to get so much time off. And that’s when he told me…”

“Oh boy,” Vijay groaned in anticipation.

“That he never started residency after medical school!”

“You’re kidding me!” Vijay let out incredulously.

“He said he actually had a change in priorities after graduating. So he now works as a manager at a record store during the day and plays in a band at night, trying to live out his dream. He figures if it doesn’t work after a few years, he’d go back and finish residency.”

“Yeah right!” Vijay said in disbelief. “And he didn’t tell you this when you had first met?”

“No. He felt like not as many women would go out with him if they knew up front what he was doing now. Besides, he was getting so many great introductions because people thought he was going to be a doctor, he didn’t want to let the secret out about his new career.”

“He knew, of course, that one day that little fact would come out, didn’t he?”

“Of course! But he always hoped that he would meet some great woman who would so fall in love with him that she would look past that little fact. He asked me if I could do that. I of course ended it right then and there telling him that was much more than just a little fact!”

“As always, your stories always can top mine,” Vijay said ruefully, “Think of it this way, at least you’ve survived another year,” he tried to find the silver lining in the birthday cloud.

There was a pause and silence. Evidently, Vijay had only found darker clouds by saying that. Megha said sadly, in a voice full of frustration, “I’m tired of just surviving. I just wish this whole thing could be over with!”

“I know,” Vijay said understandingly. “But sometimes surviving is all you can do until the right time comes,” he reminded her. He knew those words really didn’t amount to much in the form of inspirational wisdom, but it was all that he had to offer.

After a few more words of encouragement, Vijay said goodbye to Megha and sat upright in his chair, putting his feet back on the ground. He rubbed his eyes. He felt sad. Here it was Megha’s birthday, a day of celebration, and he just couldn’t shake the feeling that all she felt was despair. Somewhere inside her was that sound of a clock ticking off her eligible years as they whizzed by at what must have seemed like a dizzying speed. Then he began to realize what Valerie had been trying to tell him. It was so easy to have this aspect of their life dominate and make them feel as though their entire life was lacking. But that certainly wasn’t the case. Not for him, not for Megha, and surely not for most of the people going through what they were going through.

Vijay’s computer beeped alerting him of a new e-mail message. As he scanned the message heading, he blinked in surprise. He surely did not expect this e-mail. Not after what Valerie had said. Not so quickly. Not ever.

To: vpatel@mwe.com From: mpatel@nyu.fash.edu Re: Hope you had a good time

Vijay,

I know I said I would get back to you and you probably thought I didn’t mean it so I thought I’d do it right away. I am pretty good about things like that.

I hope you had a good time in New York even though things didn’t go exactly as planned. I also hope you and I can become friends because I really did enjoy talking to you, even if was just for a little bit of time.

Anyways, e-mail when you have the time ... if you can and if you want to. Mona

Vijay read the e-mail message quickly. He couldn’t quite decide what to make out of it. Why was she keeping in touch? It didn’t make sense. Then he thought that maybe she was keeping in touch because now she was behind in the game, and the only way for her to win was to keep playing until she was ahead. He then thought that he was becoming a little too obsessed about all this game playing nonsense by hanging out with Valerie.

He read her e-mail again and then thought to himself that no harm could come from keeping in contact with her, despite what everyone else thought about Mona. So long as he only thought of her and treated her as a friend, he should be safe. Vijay hit the reply button and worded his message carefully, wanting to make sure his reply reflected these intentions.

To: mpatel@nyu.fash.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: Re: Hope you had a good time

Mona,

I actually had a great time in New York. And about Friday, totally understandable. In the end, things still worked out better than I could have ever imagined. Call it destiny or fate.

Anyways…Definitely, let’s keep in touch. I’d love to become better friends with you too. You’re very different than most of my Indian friends which makes talking to you great.

Take care and e-mail soon. Vijay

10

The Best of Both Worlds

It was Saturday a week after Vijay had returned from New York. Not having seen his parents recently, he was looking forward to a relaxing visit home. However, no sooner than having entered through the front door, his mother rushed up to him dressed in a colorful sari, her glass bangles making soft clinking sounds as she moved her arms to and fro frantically.

“Thank goodness, you are finally home! We need to go!” she said breathlessly. “Jayendra!” she yelled out. “Please, take car out of the garage. Vijay is here at last!”

“Why, where are we going??” Vijay was taken aback.

“We have just received a telephone from Anju auntie,” his father replied having come from the family room. Anju auntie was one of his parents’ friends who lived nearby in Anaheim Hills. “She told us to come over right away because there is a family visiting them with a girl for you to see. They will be leaving soon so we need to go to say hello quickly so you can take a look at the girl.”

“What!?” Vijay exclaimed in shock, having stopped in his tracks. “You want me to meet some girl at their house right now? No way! Mom, you told me that I could at least see a picture before I met anyone!” he looked at her crossly.

“I know, but they are insisting,” she returned his look with one of helplessness. “Think this way, if you are not liking her, you do not have to spend long time. But we must go. We cannot be saying no.”

Vijay realized he could have delayed the process by hemming and hawing, but in the end the outcome would still be inevitable. It would have been rude for him not to go and would have resulted in an evening of acrimony as to whether he was taking the whole process seriously. With a sigh, he agreed to accompany them, unable to think how the day could go any worse as he prepared to visit a total stranger with his parents by his side.

They all sat in the family Honda Accord, with Jayendrabhai driving, Shantiben in the front passenger seat, and Vijay sitting in the back sulking. As they made their way, Vijay asked “So, do you guys even know anything about this girl I’m supposed to meet?”

“What are you to be needing to know? She is Patel and is coming from a good family. The rest you are knowing when you talk to her,” his mother replied.

“What does she do?” his father asked her, the fact that she was a Patel was not sufficient for him because financials were his area of primary concern.

“I am being positive that she has completed her studies,” Shantiben replied. She, however, had no answer as to what career the woman had taken. “Anju told me that she is being all ‘Bs’, beautiful, bubbly, and bright,” she offered.

“Oh brother,” Vijay rolled his eyes. “I hope that doesn’t mean she is B as in Big. Did Anju auntie even tell you what her name is?”

“I did not even ask,” Shantiben admitted.

“I just hope it’s not anybody that I know!” Vijay groaned resting his head against the window feeling an anxiety attack coming.

A few minutes later they arrived. The house was like most all other houses in Orange County. It was one of four plans arranged for a community of tract housing. The thought was that with four plans and a number of different color schemes that a whole community could be made with each house looking unique. It only really fooled those that bought homes in the tract, and that was only because they wanted to be fooled.

The three of them stepped out of the car and went to the front door. Vijay’s father rang the doorbell. Gaju uncle came to answer the door.

He looked like a Chinese Buddha because of his big belly, bald head,

and an always present smile of contentment that went from ear to ear.

“Hello, come in, come in” Gaju uncle greeted them with an echo.

Vijay took a deep breath, let it out, and followed his parents through the doorway inside. There were several people already seated in the living room waiting for their entrance.

Gaju uncle sat down on a sofa, motioning to a love seat for Shantiben and Jayendrabhai to share and a single chair that had been brought in from the dining room for Vijay to sit on. The furniture was Indian in style, made of a wooden frame and elaborately decorated cushions. On the walls were pictures of Krishna in various poses in various landscapes. Vijay felt abandoned amongst all this, sitting by himself about to face an inquisition.

In the room already sitting was another man and woman who Vijay guessed to be married to each other. They were introduced to him and his parents as Naresh uncle and Jayeshri auntie. Naresh uncle, unlike Gaju uncle, had a full head of salt pepper gray hair that was thick and almost afro-like. It was almost as if he saw Gaju uncle’s lack of hair and had taken on the mission to grow enough hair for the both of them in case of the need for an emergency hair transplant operation. Jayeshri auntie was nondescript in all manners except for her hair, which, too, had begun to show its grey. However, she was too vain to leave her hair showing gray and yet too proud to face reality by coloring it. What resulted was a compromise position whereby she had put henna in her hair under the guise that it was healthy for her scalp to do so. The other advantage in doing so, however, was that it helped to color the gray in her hair. Unfortunately, the resulting color was more of a reddish orange than a match to her otherwise dark brown hair which had given her a clownish look, if anything. Together, Vijay surmised, they comprised the mystery woman’s parents. But where was the mystery woman? Vijay looked around but did not see anyone else close to his age.

After introductions and a few minutes of idle chitchat, everyone had evidently run out of topics to discuss. There was a brief moment of awkwardness as the silence became incredibly apparent.

At that moment to break the silence, from upstairs came not one, but two women. One woman was taller with her hair short in a modern Winona Ryder hairstyle. She wore a turquoise crinkle tissue salvar kamez with matching satin trousers and meena gold jewelry. The other woman was shorter but had longer hair braided down to her hips and was dressed far more simply in an orange cotton salvar kamez with only a thin plain gold chain around her neck with an Om sign in the form of a pendant dangling at the lowest point of the chain.

Vijay was puzzled. They both looked to be similar in age. Which of the two was their daughter that he was supposed to meet, and who was the other woman? Vijay hoped to get a clue from the mystery woman’s parents as he turned his head to face them.

“Jayendrabhai, Shantiben, I would like to introduce you to my two daughters,” Naresh uncle said.

Vijay furrowed his brow further. They were sisters!

“This is Simple,” he pointed to the shorter one “and this is Dimple” he pointed to the taller one. Vijay had to fight the urge to laugh out loud at their names, thinking that it was good they didn’t have a third daughter because they might have named her Pimple.

A quick look by Vijay at his parents made him realize that they were just as perplexed as he was about who he was supposed to meet. The girls’ parents were doing nothing to help bring resolution to the issue. Apparently they were oblivious to any uncertainty that Vijay and his parents may have had.

“Dimple is in sales and Simple is in her last year of dental school,” Naresh uncle broke the silence that seemed to have settled over the room again.

“Sales? What do you sell?” Jayendrabhai asked.

Vijay could tell already that Dimple was out of the running as far as his father was concerned, not being in an occupation that he respected.

“Oh, I am actually a pharmacist, but I was recruited out of school to be a pharmaceutical representative,” Dimple replied. Vijay could tell that his father wasn’t impressed, she might as well have been a representative for Mary Kay Cosmetics.

“When I told daddy how much better you can do being a pharmaceutical rep than just working for a drug store he agreed that it was the thing for me to do. Besides, I want to be able to make enough money to enjoy things in life and not to want for anything.”

Cha-ching! Vijay could almost hear the cash register open in his father’s mind. Jayendrabhai did the mental calculations and did a 180 degree turn and started to warm up to Dimple.

Just as Jayendrabhai appeared to have an affinity to Dimple, Shantiben appeared to have the same affinity towards Simple. As sophisticated, worldly, and to Jayendrabhai’s delight, materialistic as Dimple was, Simple was the exact opposite. To put it simply, Simple was just plain simple. Never had a name so accurately fit the person. Simple was much more lively when she spoke, more religious, more cultural, more of a lot of things. More importantly, more of a lot of different things compared to her sister.

Vijay still hoped that there would be some clue that Naresh uncle would give him that would help him to narrow his field of concentration. He thought such an opportunity was coming when Naresh uncle stood up and told the grown ups, “Maybe we should leave the kids alone so that they can spend some time getting to know each other.”

Jayendrabhai and Shantiben, equally in the dark about the entire matter, couldn’t have agreed more. They stood up to leave the room with the others, leaving Vijay alone to fend for himself. Vijay expected either Simple or Dimple to stand up and walk away with the others leaving him alone with the woman he was supposed to meet, but neither woman rose to leave.

Vijay looked at them and smiled once the others had left. “I guess we’re supposed to talk now. I do have one question that I’m just dying to ask. Am I hear to meet you both?”

“You mean you didn’t know?” Dimple and Simple both laughed a similar laugh. Vijay had no doubt that either their mother or their father, or perhaps even both, had the same laugh.

“Now I understand! You and your parents had such puzzled looks on your faces when we both came down!” laughed Dimple.

“What’s the age difference between you two?” asked Vijay, surprised at the two for one special offer that their parents had offered to him.

“Simple is 25 and I’m 26 as of last month,” answered Dimple moving her chair close beside Simple’s to facilitate one answering for the both of them.

“So your parents are looking for the both of you?” Vijay knew very well how much his parents complained about having to go through the process for just him, he couldn’t imagine what it must be like with two girls. He looked at both of them and asked, “Isn’t this even more strange though—meeting the same guys like this?”

“It was at first,” admitted Simple, “But since we are so close in age and because we’re both ready, it just makes sense to look together.”

“A lot of our friends who have older or younger brothers and sisters have this whole assembly line system of doing things where you can’t look or get married until your older sister or brother is married. So everyone always concentrates on the oldest one. But it might take me a long time to find someone, and it wouldn’t be fair to Simple to not have people looking for her until I was married,” Dimple explained.

“I understand all that,” said Vijay. He knew of friends who had wanted to get married to someone that they had fallen in love with but were forced to wait until the elder siblings had been married off. “Still, it would just seem weird. If a guy only liked one of you, wouldn’t the other feel bad about that?” he asked Simple.

“I think for a while we felt like that would be a problem, but our mom told us something that made a lot of sense. The fact that a guy might pick one of us over the other doesn’t mean that the other came in second. It’s just that whoever we happened to be meeting had more in common with one over the other,” said Simple.

“So, basically,” Dimple continued, “when we’ve had these joint meetings in the past, Simple sometimes is more attracted to a guy and I’m not, and vice versa. And the same thing for the guy. But it’s more of a compatibility thing, not a competition. It’s kind of like we’re two different pieces of a puzzle. Just because someone fits better with one, doesn’t mean that the other piece is not any less of a desirable piece of the puzzle.”

Vijay sighed in agreement. Evidently this whole puzzle concept was something that they had, like he had with Jennifer, learned to understand and appreciate when it came to finding a soul mate.

For the next half hour, Vijay, Dimple and Simple talked and learned more about each other and the three of them came to the conclusion that no two pieces of the puzzle would fit that day. Vijay, in attempting to try and describe characteristics he thought he was looking for, found some of them in Simple and some of them in Dimple.

Vijay laughed saying “it’s too bad I can’t marry both of you. Together, you would be the perfect woman for me!”

“Well, I’m sure our dad would love it, he could save on wedding expenses by just having to pay for one!” Simple laughed.

It was all pleasant, albeit, strange to Vijay. They were very open about the idea of exploring the potential for marriage. The more that they spoke with each other that afternoon the more it became evident that Vijay would not be marrying either sister. But that was okay. There were no hurt feelings nor any dashed expectations.

His parents and the others came back in, evidently feeling that enough time had elapsed for them to have come to a decision. Vijay again was amazed at how they expected this whole process to operate quickly and efficiently. It was almost as if they believed each of them had encoded their likes and dislikes on a multiple choice answer form, and that all that was necessary in order to find a suitable spouse was to compare each other’s test results during their prescribed half hour meeting, although they had given Vijay forty-five minutes this time because there were three test papers to compare, not the standard two.

Although there was some more small talk, the parents discussed no further the outcome of the meeting between Vijay, Simple and Dimple. It wasn’t that anyone could tell from looking at their faces. Rather, it just wasn’t done that way. The two sides were to retreat to their own home camps and then, if anything was to be done based on the information uncovered pursuant to individual interrogations, it would be handled via telephone in a timely manner. This time, however, as they drove home, the debriefing was brief.

“What’d you think of Dimple?” his father asked.

“No. Not everything that I’m looking for.”

“What’d you think of Simple?” his mother asked.

“No. Again, not everything I’m looking for. But put them together, and maybe we can talk!” Vijay said, as they all laughed driving back home.

11

Great Expectations Indian Style

Although only a year had passed by since Vijay had started his search for a wife, the search had initially hit the ground running at full speed. Family and friends had been immediately notified and a widespread net had been cast to find the right woman for Vijay.

Many of their family and friends knew of potential matches. Although Vijay was only given brief descriptions about each one, they all sounded alike. Adjectives like “fair”, “very beautiful”, and “sweet personality” were frequently used. Just as Rocky had told Vijay not to be fooled by a beautiful picture because the woman might not look nearly as good in person, his parents, relatives and family friends said the exact opposite—don’t be fooled by a bad picture because the woman might look much better in person. Because of this, Vijay felt obligated to meet almost everyone. Unfortunately, most of the women he had met did not live up to their descriptions but rather lived down to their pictures.

The process so far had taken a considerable amount of time and effort. Once Vijay complained to a non Indian friend about how he was being introduced to so many women that he had no time to be alone. His friend looked at him with envy and said that most guys would love to be in his shoes with a different woman to meet each week. Vijay stopped to think about it and realized that the whole concept of marriage seemed to have taken the fun out of what could otherwise have been an exciting experience.

And then, after a big flurry of activity for over a year, it had come to a standstill. The referrals from family and family friends came to a stop.

It seemed like there was no one left to meet. Although Vijay finally got his respite, he still had not found a wife.

“So, did anybody call? Any new pictures?” Vijay asked anxiously as he came through the front door of his parents’ house on a Saturday morning. It had felt strange to have no one to evaluate after spending months talking to and meeting so many women and shifting through countless pictures.

“Nothing this week,” said his father, sitting on a couch in the living room reading the newspaper. It was the third weekend in a row that Vijay had come through the door wondering if any woman was left in the world who was still single and willing to meet him. “We’ve asked everyone we know. But don’t worry, we have a plan,” his father put the newspaper aside. “Next week you have an appointment with Ushaben.”

Vijay sat down in one of the facing armchairs. “What’s going on? Who is she and why do I have to meet her?” he asked with suspicion

“Ushaben has started an organization called the ‘Marriage for Indians Bureau’. She can help us introduce you to girls that we would otherwise not know. We made an appointment for you on Saturday,” explained his father.

Vijay began to feel a wave of embarrassment after hearing about his parents’ plan. He groaned, “It was bad enough that our whole family and all of our friends are looking, but now you want me to go to a stranger for help finding a wife? It just makes me feel so…desperate!” he whined.

“Just go! What does it matter who makes the introduction? Isn’t the important thing for you to find someone that you like?” his father interrupted Vijay’s whining with practical parental logic.

“I guess so,” Vijay sighed and relented, realizing that what his father said was true. A year ago Vijay would have fought much more to avoid having to be subjected to such embarrassing measures. But a year had passed without success, and this began to worry him. During this time and because of his concerns, he had taken a new approach and had a new attitude about his search. He realized that he had already waded halfway into the arranged marriage pool a year ago. The only way for him to get out of the pool now was to find that right woman so that he could end his search. His best chances of doing that, however, involved diving in all the way and doing all that he could. Walking backwards to the shallow end of the arranged marriage pool didn’t solve anything. So he took a deep breath and agreed to go farther. He agreed to meet Ushaben next Saturday.

The address his father had given him wasn’t a house, but rather an office building built in the 30s with ornate architecture on a major thoroughfare sandwiched in between a new Chevrolet dealership and a small strip mall still under construction. It was as if this small building was symbolic of the old ways interwoven amongst new ways. On the front was a hand painted sign marked “MIB” with “Marriage for Indians Bureau” in smaller block letters directly underneath explaining what the initials stood for. Jayendrabhai and Shantiben were not with him because Ushaben has specifically requested that they not come. This request made Vijay even more nervous than curious.

Chimes rang as he opened the door, announcing his arrival. A woman came out into the hallway to greet him. She probably was over fifty years old but she dressed as if she were thirty and looked like she had fought with valor in the battle to maintain that appearance. Unlike many women Vijay knew her age, she actually dressed in stylish American, as opposed to Indian, clothes.

“Vijay?” she asked. He nodded with a slight wave. “Hello! My name is Usha. Please, come in,” she motioned him into her office with a welcoming gesture. There was no auntie at the end of her name, reflecting even more that she might be cut from a cloth different than those of her generation.

Her office was pleasantly decorated in pastel colors with a nice cherry wood desk in the middle, a high office chair behind her desk, and two very comfortable armchairs on the other side. After sitting in one of the armchairs he crossed his legs and then uncrossed them as an afterthought and a sign of his nervousness.

“Okay, let’s get started,” Usha said, wasting no time after sitting down behind the desk. “I like to start with a little disclaimer. I’m very involved in the Indian community and like many people, I believe the culture loses something if Indians don’t marry Indians. But, I also don’t believe that it’s wrong for anyone to marry someone who isn’t Indian. The most important thing for me is that you kids be happy. I want you to remember that.” Evidently she wanted to make sure she wasn’t portrayed as one of those community members whose sole purpose was to discourage anything other than Indian marriages.

Vijay nodded his understanding, happy that Usha appeared to be much more open about these kinds of issues. “What is it exactly that MIB does to help?” Vijay asked, sitting up in the chair.

“Basically, we find out about as many Indian kids that are looking for someone and introduce them to each other, and if something works out, then it’s wonderful. But it’s up to you kids to decide if and when. ‘We just introduce, we don’t produce’,” she said with a practiced smile, no doubt having used that line on every person that had come in to use the services of MIB.

“I guess that doesn’t sound so bad,” he grinned, wanting her to feel like the MIB motto still had some punch even after years of use. It all sounded like the Indian version of the Great Expectations dating service. “What do you need from me?” Vijay asked.

“First, tell me what you’re looking for,” she had opened up a folder which contained a checklist of questions. “I know that’s the million dollar question and everyone has their two cents to put in, but I try to make the first withdrawal of information from you rather than from your parents.” She took a pen out of a drawer and was poised to record his response.

“Before we do this, I have a question. Is that why you specifically asked my parents not to come with me today?”

Usha put her pen down and leaned back into her chair. She said, “Yes. This whole arranged process needs to be something that you want to do, not something that your parents are making you do. I’ve seen so many times how parents push their kids into this when the kids are not ready to get married or maybe when their kids are going out with someone who the parents don’t like. When this is happening, my involvement is pointless. So I like to know up front whether you’re really interested in going through this and I like to know the kind of person that will make you, not your parents, happy.”

“You don’t have to worry about that one. As strange as it sounds to me to say this, my parents and I are on the same page,” said Vijay.

“That’s what I thought,” she smiled. She then explained how MIB worked. It was very simple by design. Everyone that participated gave her their photos and bio-data, and she placed them in a photo album. She maintained over six photo albums now with over eighty pages in each album with each page containing a bio-data and pictures of a matrimonial prospect. There were four albums of women and two albums of men because, as she said it, women were more receptive to whatever measures were necessary in order to find a life partner. She explained that Vijay could then go through the photo albums to see if there were any women that he was interested in meeting. If so, she would send a letter with a copy of his information and then it was up to the parties to make contact if they were interested.

After completing Vijay’s page and receiving a copy of his bio-data and pictures, Usha rose from her desk and brought the four albums of women over to him. Each album was heavy, bound in vinyl, and different in color. Usha explained that when she had first started, she thought one album for single men and one for single women would suffice. However, the demand for the service she offered and the void that she filled was great. The fact that Usha was of a personality that both parents and kids could be comfortable with was as much as a testament to her popularity as was the expanded six album set now occupying the book shelves in the corner of her office.

Vijay began to go through the pages while Usha went about other paperwork. He went through the first album very quickly, as most of the women in there were much older than him. However, in the other albums most of the women were his age or younger. As he sat there flipping through pages, marking down those who he might be interested in meeting by affixing a yellow post-it on each selected page, he thought to himself that this process was great. He was literally meeting hundreds of women through their pictures and bio-datas in less than an hour. The best thing was that they didn’t know that when he flipped by their page after a brief one second scan, that he had in some way said “no” to them. There were no bio-datas to mail back without phone calls and there was no feeling of sadness at having to come to the realization with the other person that it didn’t seem like “they” would work.

As he went through the pages he was pleasantly surprised. In addition to several familiar faces, it was full of attractive people who appeared to be very interesting. There were doctors, lawyers, pharmacists, accountants, and engineers. In fact, most of the pictures in the albums were of people that Vijay would never think needed to resort to such processes and bureaus. But then, he hoped others who came to visit Usha would say the same about him.

After Vijay had turned every page in each of the four albums, Usha auntie joined him and he reviewed with her the pages with yellow post-its signaling potential interests. She knew each and every person in the albums and offered further insight as to whether she thought it was someone worth pursuing or not. Together, they formed a list of fifteen women, most of whom lived out of state and whom Vijay might never have had an opportunity to meet but for Usha.

“I’ll go ahead and send out letters with your bio-data to these girls, and I’m sure you’ll get some responses,” she said, waving goodbye. Vijay felt vindicated in having taken the plunge in meeting her. He was walking away with potentials to meet again. It had been a while since the last time that he had been able to say that.

12

The One That Got Away

After his meeting with Usha, Vijay’s social calendar picked up again. Of the fifteen women Vijay had shown interest in and to whom Usha had sent letters, five responded wanting to talk to Vijay more. The numbers weren’t as bad as it might have seemed. This was because out of the fifteen, four women were already “talking to someone” and three others were already married. Upon hearing of the married ones, Usha shook her head and took their information out of the photo albums, complaining that she was always the last to find out when there was good news.

Of the five women who had responded, Vijay talked to all of them by phone, and even met a few in person flying to various cities or having them visit him like Megha had so long ago. Although all were very nice, Vijay saw no fireworks with the first four. With the fifth one, however, the story was dramatically different.

Her name was Sonia, she was a twenty-three year old physical therapist from Chicago, and without even realizing how, he inexplicably felt immediately comfortable talking to her. Their conversation was no different than other conversations he had been a part of through this process and it wasn’t as though Sonia possessed characteristics that he hadn’t found in many of the other women he had been introduced to in the past. But yet he still inexplicably felt different about her. He likened it all to some kind of secret recipe. Although all the women he had been introduced to fundamentally had the same “ingredients”, that alone was never enough. It was the recipe that brought all these ingredients together that determined whether the person was someone truly compatible. Vijay surmised that it was that way with Sonia. Vijay could tell just from a few phone calls. He really liked her, even though he had not yet met her in person, and it excited him.

Two weeks and six telephone conversations later they decided to meet. As it turned out, it was more of an opportunity to do so presenting itself rather than a planned decision. Vijay had to travel back east for work and he was able to arrange to have his flight come back through Chicago for a one day stopover.

Vijay’s plane arrived on time at nine in the morning on Saturday. As the plane taxied to the terminal he kept imagining Sonia to be someone not particularly amazing. In fact, he tried to imagine her as someone not at all his type. He did all of this in an attempt to bring his hopes down, to be in the proper frame of reference when he walked out. But then what happened was a first for him.

As he walked through the gate and into the airport, he spotted her, waiting for him at the end of the gate, and his heart stopped. For all the times he had been introduced to women who were described to him as extraordinary only to find they were disappointingly ordinary, this time the exact opposite proved to be true. She looked even more captivating and attractive than her picture could have ever suggested.

She wore a knee-length floral print skirt with a plain white top that appeared to be straight off the rack of a Banana Republic store. She was dressed very simply and practically—no-nonsense, but soft and beautiful nonetheless. To Vijay it wouldn’t have mattered. All he could see were the fireworks going off the first second he laid eyes on her.

As they walked out of the airport after greeting each other she asked him “I hope you’re okay to do some moving around.” She approached a Saab convertible and opened the trunk so that he could put his bag inside. “After all, you asked me to show you the town, and with the little time we have, I thought I would do just that.”

“That actually sounds great! What’s the plan?” he asked, getting into the car after she had reached over from the driver’s seat and unlocked his door.

“I minored in art history while an undergrad and never get to visit the Art Institute anymore because of school. I was hoping we could go there this afternoon if that’s okay with you, I know how boring museums can be to most people,” she asked hesitantly, no doubt uncertain as to how he would react to such a plan.

“I couldn’t think of a better way to spend the day. I’d love to see the Monet collection they have,” Vijay said with a smile, putting on his seat belt, already interested and familiar with what the Art Institute had to offer.

She looked at him again. “There aren’t many people that would agree to go to a museum with me.” She looked at him with a smile on her face. “This will be fun.”

They drove to the Art Institute with the thought that after seeing the current exhibit and the Monet collection they could walk around the city. The both of them, however, were so content talking, getting to know each other, and roaming through the numerous rooms catching fragments of conversations from the meandering docent tours that they only realized that they had spent the entire afternoon inside when the guards announced that the museum was closing. They both looked at their watches amazed that five hours had passed by so quickly.

As they walked down the front steps of the Art Institute, Vijay could see an El train making its way over the city streets. After it had passed with a clattering, Vijay said to Sonia, “Thanks for thinking of this. This has been a great day!” he said, looking at her.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” she smiled again at him. “But there’s more. I have something planned for us outdoors tonight before your flight home.”

That evening a phenomenon that occurred for a period of two months every twenty-seven years was taking place. A meteor’s orbit was coming close to Earth and loose debris from its tail was streaking through the atmosphere creating an impressive meteor shower display. As it so happened, the meteor shower was particularly visible in the northern part of the United States immediately after dusk. This was why Sonia had planned for them to go to the Chicago Planetarium. Vijay could think of nothing more perfect.

The night was perfect. The normally humid Chicago summer made for a delightfully warm and comfortable evening. Sonia was a consummate planner, having brought a large comfortable blanket and pillows on which to lie and watch the night sky as it darkened from an orange-blue to black. Vijay was accustomed to L.A.’s artificially enhanced sunsets full of purples, reds, and blues. He had never anticipated being impressed with sunsets anywhere else. But as he lay there, on the blanket, on a grass hill, next to the Planetarium, waiting for signs of a meteor shower, he could not remember a sunset, a light to dusk to dark movement, that he enjoyed more. He believed, probably very correctly, that Sonia lying next to him staring at the sky added to the beauty of the night.

Sitting there, relaxed, he thought back to how Valerie had realized in New York that the perfect person could have slipped by her while she was busy going out, for the sake of going out, with guys who she knew weren’t right for her. Vijay had learned that lesson much earlier than that. But it was because of this that he had recently been worried. Although there had been opportunities to date women, even through this process, he held off not wanting to jeopardize his chances of finding the “right” woman. As a result, he hadn’t gone out with anyone for what seemed like an interminable number of years all in the name of keeping his options open. The problem lately, Vijay had realized, was that the “right” woman had not yet come. It made him wonder if he was holding out for something that didn’t exist. All those doubts and fears washed away as he looked at Sonia. He felt like she was what he had been waiting for all these years.

Sonia turned to him and asked, “So what are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking this was a great idea. It’s like we’re waiting for the fireworks on the 4th of July. I’m a big fan of fireworks,” Vijay explained with a smile of contentment, personally referring not only to the ones that exploded in the sky, but also the ones he kept seeing whenever he looked at Sonia.

“Oh look, there’s one!” She let out abruptly changing the topic, sensing the serious love struck way he must have been looking at her. It was almost as if she realized how much Vijay’s feelings for her had soared uncontrollably and she wanted to bring him back to the ground. Vijay, too blind to notice, only saw an arm, her arm, intrude on his vision of the night sky, pointing to a brief flare that he caught through the corner of his eye. It seemed as though as least one person from each of the groups lying on the ground was pointing it out to the others as the field around the Planetarium, previously quiet amid the quiet buzz of individual conversations, was lit afire by excitement of the show to come.

They spent another hour star gazing while Sonia steered the conversation to more standard, non-relationship topics, telling him about her school, her family, and how she loved her life in Chicago. She then took him to the airport. She opened the trunk and he took his garment bag out.

“Thanks again for a wonderful time Sonia.”

“I had a great time too,” she replied.

They just stood there for a bit, his longing stare holding them fixed in place. Vijay broke out of his trance. “Well, I’d better go. Good bye,” he gave her a long hug and a quick peck on the cheek and quickly walked away into the airport like an awkward teenager at his first dance, not certain what else to do.

As the plane took off and rushed to meet the night sky, Vijay stared out his window, smiling, looking for more meteorites. He wasn’t coming home alone this time. He was coming home with hope and the thought of Sonia on his mind.

The next morning he spoke with his parents because they had called early, as usual, waking him up. Vijay was guarded, however, in his conversation with them saying only that his visit went “okay”, that he and Sonia were going to “maybe see how things go”, and that there was “nothing to be excited about”. He really wanted to talk to Rocky so that he could express his true excitement without it triggering wedding plans and the accompanying travel arrangements to Chicago to meet Sonia’s parents. Rocky, however, was not at home, leaving Vijay in an excited state of mind as he replayed his visit to Chicago over and over again.

He took a shower to fully wake up, but could not wash away his memories of Sonia. He felt such a strong urge to call her that he didn’t even bother to comb his hair before he dialed. The phone rang three times and her answering machine picked up. Vijay realized that given the time difference, she had probably woken up and left hours ago to study. After her message played he said “Hello. It’s me. Just wanted to let you know that I made it back to L.A. in one piece and I miss you already. Call me back when you can. Bye.” He put the receiver down “And I miss you already?” he said to himself in disbelief. Had he really said that? Sonia must really have been having an effect on him.

The next day he went out to lunch with Valerie and spoke excitedly to her about Sonia.

“I’m telling you, I think I could be in love!” He had picked a table out in the sun in the plaza at the foot of their office building. Those were not words he had said in a long time.

“Oh hush, you’ve only met her for one day! How could you know if you were in love already?” she shook her head, no doubt thinking Vijay was acting silly like all men were apt to do.

“I have all these incredible feelings for her,” he tried to convince Valerie. “I can’t explain it, but she could be the one.”

“I hope you haven’t been this googily with her,” she complained in between bites of her pasta salad.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I hope you weren’t giving off intense signals starting from the moment you first saw her. Please tell me that you haven’t called her already since you’ve come back,” she pleaded.

“Well…” Vijay trailed off, looking away from her, embarrassed to admit he had already done the unthinkable in Valerie’s mind.

“You’ve called her already?” Valerie asked incredulously putting her fork down.

“Kinda. But only four times,” Vijay responded sheepishly.

“You’re going to blow it if you aren’t careful!” she admonished him although her tone suggested that he was already a lost cause. “You know the Rules! You should never call someone right after you’ve met them. Industry standard say’s you’ve got to wait at least two to four days!”

“I don’t believe in any of that nonsense,” Vijay said stubbornly. He had finished his lunch and had put the plate aside.

“I’m telling you, as a woman,” she pointed to him with a scowl, “if you were acting too interested it would scare me off. Or who knows, it might even turn me off.”

“This whole game playing thing and the Rules may work when you’re on a dating circuit, but it doesn’t work for what I’m going through. If I’m meeting someone clear across the country, I feel like I just have to be open about how I feel. There’s no time for these stupid games.”

Valerie let the words sink in as she took another bite of her pasta salad. Upon some reflection, she admitted “Maybe you’re right. This whole process that you’re going through is definitely foreign to me. I guess I just want to make sure that if she’s someone that you see yourself really being happy with, that you don’t mess it up.”

“All right, all right,” Vijay raised his hands in surrender. “I appreciate your concern. And I promise, I won’t wear my attraction for her on my sleeve if I can help it,” Vijay agreed.

After his talk with Valerie, Vijay tried acting a little more nonchalant with Sonia. But try as he might, he was so inexplicably enraptured that he kept doing foolish things. In one instance, Sonia received a phone call on the other line and cut their phone conversation short with an apology to take the other call. During their next telephone conversation, Vijay felt compelled to make arrangements to have Rocky call and interrupt on the other line so that he too would appear equally inaccessible and popular. It continued in this bizarre one-upsmanship way, except that Vijay was the only one playing this game.

A few weeks passed this way and Vijay found himself having lunch with Valerie again. He no longer felt as happy and excited as he had the first time.

“I can tell just looking at you. You’ve got woman problems. Is it that soon-to-be wife of yours, Sonia?” she asked Vijay playfully.

“It’s all just so frustrating!” Vijay released pent up exasperation. “I feel like I’m doing all the work! For every four phone calls, I must be making three of them. It just doesn’t seem like there is an even amount of trying on both sides!”

Valerie listened to him rant and then said, “It just makes me wonder…” she didn’t finish the sentence but chose at that time to occupy herself with her lunch.

“What?” he asked, although he thought he knew.

“I sometimes think that you can tell how interested someone is by how much effort they’re willing to put in. To be honest, things don’t exactly sound great from what you’ve been saying.”

He wasn’t happy to hear the honest analysis from Valerie. This unhappiness was only because it verified in him how he had assessed the situation. If it had been someone else, he would have said the same thing, starting off with a ‘Looking at the situation objectively, here’s how I see it…’. The problem was that he couldn’t be objective. He had so fallen for Sonia that he kept making excuses for her behavior, desperately believing these excuses to be true.

Vijay, despite having received all the signals and having processed them with the help of his friends, was still in denial and held eternal hope that Sonia really had been busy with finals and that all would be fine soon. A week after his lunch with Valerie, he made arrangements to go on another business trip which would allow him to go through Chicago to pay a visit with Sonia again. His spirits rose, as he thought that another face to face would surely rejuvenate, and help to remind her about how great it could be between them. He, of course, needed no such reminders.

“Hello?” Sonia’s voice answered. Vijay had called her number and hung up ten times through the course of the day because he kept getting her answering machine and he didn’t want to chance his message on what he believed to be her capricious answering machine. It had, according to Sonia, already lost two of his messages previously which, she had explained, was the reason she hadn’t called him back.

“Hi. It’s me.” he said.

“Hi. Can we talk later? I’ve got my last final to study for tomorrow and then this awful semester will finally be over!”

“I just have a quick question for you then.” He said in a tone as if he were about to reveal a pleasant surprise.

“Okay,” she responded, unsuspectingly.

“I have to come out to the east coast on another business trip in a week and I was wondering if you’d be interested in meeting again. It would be after your finals are over so I was hoping you might have some free time to do something fun.”

There was an awkward silence. She then said, “I’m sorry, but I don’t think that’s such a great idea.” She sighed and then another period of silence followed. “I probably should have said something earlier, but I just never know what to say in these kinds of situations and just keep trying to avoid things.” More silence. Vijay just gripped the telephone listening. “I know, I probably just made things worse because of that. The truth is, I don’t feel like this is working. I don’t know…I’m sorry,” she repeated, fumbling, not certain how to get the words out, certain only that the words had to come out.

Vijay was reeling. He sat down, and put one of his hands on his forehead. She no longer even had excuses or reasons for him not to come over other than the one he dreaded, that she didn’t feel for him like he did for her. “But I feel like we’re so perfect for each other. Are you sure?” he asked desperately.

She sighed again, more in control. “Do you remember what you told me after we had left the museum and were at the El train station? We were talking about who our perfect persons were?”

“Yeah.”

“I think I had said the perfect person for me would be someone who I just felt so comfortable and attracted to, like no other person could ever make me feel. Like two ends of a train track, perfectly aligned. And I think you had said that was only one-half of the answer. That there always are two tracks, and it was perfection only when both of the tracks were aligned. That in order for the person to be perfect, they had to feel the same way about you too.

“Perfection on both ends,” Vijay remembered what he had said that day underneath the El tracks. He then realized why she had brought back that concept. “I see. I guess I may have been focusing only on my end of the tracks.”

“Well…” she trailed the word off with no others to follow. It was as if she was trying very hard not to have to agree to his conclusion out loud, but rather only allude to it. “I’m sorry, Vijay,” she said quietly.

Vijay let out a sigh. “I’d better go.”

“Good bye.”

And like that, another chapter in Vijay’s life came to an end. Vijay hung up the phone, put on his running shoes, and went on a long run.

He tried to rationalize everything now. He had said “no” to lots of women during this process. It was only fair that he be on the receiving end finally.

But as much as he tried to make it all make sense, he couldn’t escape the feeling of being cursed. It was a case of bad luck, similar to when as a child he played hide and seek with his friends. There were certain days when for some reason or other, he would always end up being “it” no matter what he did. That same feeling overcame him again, making him run even harder, hoping the pain in his body would dull the other pain. The one that hurt even more.

He thought viciously as he ran into the sunset on the wet packed sand near the surf. This was all supposed to be like corporate dating. No one was supposed to get hurt. Just friendly inquiries, encounters and evaluations. And it had been like that. Well, mostly. But in the past, he hadn’t been the one that had fallen for someone. Now he was. And the hurt was unbearable. A hurt no less painful than it had been with Jennifer when they had broken up. This puzzled Vijay. Because Vijay hadn’t known Sonia for long, having met her only once. Why, he wondered, did this cause him such pain? After an hour of running away, he realized why it had hurt so much. Even though he had known Sonia for such little time, it had felt so right so right away, just like it had with Rina. It had been special. It was almost as if Sonia was this wonderful meteor that had come blazing into his life. But now, after coming so close, leaving a tail of shooting stars and fireworks, she was leaving him, gone forever.

The next time when his parents called and asked if any progress was being made, he would have to once again say “No”. And as so often was the case lately, Vijay stopped running, took a deep breath, and realized he was still alone.

To: m.patel@nyu.fashion.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: Destiny / Fate Revisited

Mona,

Sorry I haven’t responded to your last e-mail to me for a while. It’s just that I’ve been so busy because I am officially on the marriage track. My parents are trying to set me up with Indian women around the country in the hopes that I’ll find someone to marry.

It kind of feels hopeless sometimes though. I’m looking for this one perfect person and it just seems that finding her and having her feel the same way about me is impossible. The perfect person. Is there such a thing?

Let me know what you think. Vijay

To: vpatel@mwe.com From: m.patel@nyu.fashion.edu Re: Re: Destiny / Fate Revisited

Vijay,

Personally, I think there is a perfect person for all of us and that we’ll find them given time. I feel that each person has more than one perfect person so its not as impossible as it sometimes seems. I also believe that destiny and fate will guide us, no matter what we do. Paths will cross—in unex

pected ways. Be patient. But I have a question for you—why are you limiting yourself to just Indian women? What about that woman I met with you when you visited—Valerie? To make it easier to find that perfect person, shouldn’t you be casting the widest net possible?

Mona

To: m.patel@nyu.fashion.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: Casting the net.

Mona,

Valerie’s just a good friend I work with. We’re the only single ones left at the firm so we give each other support in our dating adventures. And while I have gone out with women who weren’t Indian in the past, for some reason, now that I’m older, finding someone Indian is something very important to me—important enough that for a woman to be perfect for me, she’d have to be Indian.

I guess the result of that is my search will continue—as painful, difficult, and lengthy as that search may be.

Vijay

13

Look Before You Leap

“Hi Vijay. Can you talk?” a tired voice asked over the telephone

at midnight.

“Megha? What’s wrong?” Vijay answered the phone with concern. She and Vijay had been talking more often lately, re-establishing connections naturally now that the unnatural parental scrutiny and pressure of marriage had been taken away. But this call was unusually late even for her to be making.

“I’ve been up all night talking to a friend of mine who’s kinda down about all this arranged marriage stuff. After talking to her trying to bring her up, I kinda started to feel down myself. I just felt like I needed someone to talk to and I thought of you,” she said earnestly.

“Tell me what happened,” Vijay said quietly.

“My friend Sheila was introduced to this guy named Sumeet a few months ago at a wedding. Things looked good pretty quickly so much so that, when his parents were in town last week, Sumeet actually introduced her to them.”

“Is the problem that they don’t like her?” Vijay asked.

“No, it’s not that,” she sighed. “Sheila is perfect, and Sumeet’s parents thought so too. The problem is that Sumeet’s parents wanted to meet her parents while they were in town since things were going so well.”

“Did that not go well?” he tried to predict again where the conversation was going. “You could say that. About two years ago, Sheila’s father had a stroke and is partially paralyzed. Sheila’s mother stays home to take

care of him. So when Sumeet’s parents went to Sheila’s house to meet them…

Vijay understood where the conflict existed, interrupting, “Let me guess, Sumeet’s parents were less than thrilled about the situation for their son.”

“Yeah,” Megha said sadly. “His parents told him that if he married Sheila, he was going to end up having to take care of the whole family. They wanted him to break it off with Sheila and he did just that today. Sometimes Indians can be just so…so, insensitive and stupid!” she finished, frustrated because she couldn’t think of more appropriate and bitter words to described Sumeet and his parents.

“I don’t know if it’s an Indian thing,” Vijay said after further reflection. “I think anybody, whether Indian or not, would have had the same reaction in that kind of situation.”

“That’s not true!” Megha answered back vehemently. “I have this friend who isn’t Indian, and she met someone the normal way, not the messed up way we do. They started going out and fell in love and are married now. Things happened to them and their families before they got married. But they loved each other and dealt with it together. They didn’t quit! Why can’t our Indian thinking be like that? If you’re in love, you should be able to deal with things and be supportive!”

“But there’s a huge difference,” Vijay protested after thinking about Megha’s example, “It’s like you said. Your friends met through the normal way and they fell in love.”

“So? Can’t Indians be normal and fall in love?”

“They can,” Vijay responded. “But everything about this arranged marriage process is designed to learn about a person up front before you’ve even had a chance to really fall in love.”

“And?” Megha continued stubbornly, still unable to see any difference.

“And,” Vijay continued, “because of that, there’s a whole different order of things for us. Your friends fell in love and learned about things along the way. Their love for each other was strong enough then to deal with the issues. But for Sheila and Sumeet, and for us and everyone else that goes through this process, you learn about everything before anyone’s really had a chance to truly fall in love. And well, if things aren’t exactly how you’d like them, there’s no strong love there yet to make it work.”

“It just seems so mechanical though. It’s almost like you have to look at the financial statements before you can even make any kind of emotional connection with a person,” Megha said tiredly. “And because of that, you might miss out on something that actually works. Whatever happened to the romantic leap of faith we were all supposed to take where you fall in love with the person, not their entire set of circumstances?”

“We kinda lose out on that,” Vijay said sadly. “Most people usually fall in love before they take their leap of faith. For us, though, because how this is all set up, we’re forced to look before we can even fall in love. Because of that we may not be making those leaps of faith that we really ought to be.”

14

Parental Conventions Regarding Matrimonial Conventions

“So what’s up? Any new potential wives on the marriage radar screen?” Rocky asked Vijay. They had just entered Carl’s House of Billiards, a true gritty neighborhood pool hall. The place was not one of the yuppie hangouts where people went to “play pool” but rather a place where people went to “shoot stick.” As a result, the pool tables were available for less than ten dollars an hour and the waitresses were unattractive. Rocky had already sunk two balls in the first game before any conversation between them had even started.

“No, the coast unfortunately seems pretty clear,” Vijay said glumly as he applied chalk to the end of his pool cue. He never knew the reason for doing so other than that people who seemed to know how to play pool always did. “Believe me, my parents are pulling out all the stops, but no one’s panned out yet.”

Rocky missed, sinking the cue ball into the corner pocket. Vijay pulled it out and lined it up for an easy shot. “Are you planning to go to the convention?” Rocky asked as Vijay struck a ball that rolled into a corner pocket.

Vijay stood up to look at Rocky forgetting, for a moment, his next shot, and asked puzzled, “Convention? What’re you talking about?”

“Didn’t you know? Every year during Thanksgiving weekend there’s a Gujarati convention. A couple of thousand people usually go to it. A lot of people our age. Lots of new faces,” Rocky described. He now was applying chalk to the end of his pool cue, no doubt not knowing the

purposes of it any more than Vijay did.

“Is it any fun?”

“Definitely! And the parents love it because they feel like it gives us all a chance to meet other single people and, who knows, maybe find someone. It’s set up to be a matrimonial convention, but it’s really just a big party. I’ve actually gone to the last couple of them and they weren’t too bad. We should totally go!”

“I’m up for it,” Vijay agreed. He went back to lining up his shot. “So have you ever met anyone at any of these matrimonial conventions?” Vijay asked, after sinking in another ball.

“Yeah I have. There are always some potentials each time I’ve gone. Unfortunately, none of them have worked out in the past. Just remember. You have to go in with the right attitude. It’s kinda like a lottery. You probably won’t win, but you can still have a lot of fun playing!” Rocky rationalized.

Later that weekend, Vijay came home to visit.

“Hey mom, I was talking to Rocky, and we were thinking of going to a Gujarati convention in Florida during Thanksgiving,” he disclosed, hoping she wouldn’t be upset at his leaving the family on the holiday. Vijay had prepared his list of reasons why it would be good for him to go. Her response, however, was not at all what he was expecting.

“That is being wonderful news! Papa and I have been talking for a few days now about thinking how to convince you to go. We are getting information in the mail last week about it. I was thinking surely you would be complaining about attending!”

Vijay seized this opportunity to close the deal. “It sounds pretty good. And who knows? Maybe I can meet someone there,” Vijay said, thinking this was all going too easy. “Rocky will even be there to keep me company.”

“Do not be worrying, Vijay,” Shantiben beamed. “Papa and I are being there also to help you find girls,” she said happily, her son finally now cooperating fully in the search for his wife.

“But…,” Vijay was completely taken aback at the thought that they were coming with him. This wasn’t part of the party plan. Surely they would cramp his style. But how could he possibly tell them that?

“Do not be worrying,” Shantiben said, looking at him and his suddenly worried frown. Vijay breathed an internal sigh of relief. Perhaps they would not come if they realized how uncomfortable this would make him feel. “We will all be having good times!” she beamed again, leaving to share the happy news with Jayendrabhai. As she left the room, all Vijay could think was that what at first seemed like an interesting and casual way to meet a lot of people his age had completely lost its appeal now that his parents were coming along.

15

The Meet Market—Registration

As the plane rested at the gate, Vijay glumly stood up from his seat. After committing to the convention, he began to realize unhappily that there was much more of an emphasis on it being matrimonial rather than it being a party. The thought of this had begun to make him uneasy. To add to his dismay, Rocky was going to be delayed and wouldn’t arrive until late Thursday. Fortunately, however, he would not be completely alone because he had spoken to Megha who had told him that she had been coerced to attend the convention by a friend as well.

Because of the time difference, his flight leaving early Wednesday afternoon from Los Angeles had arrived late in the night in Florida. As he unboarded with his garment bag containing suits his mother had called twice to make sure he had brought, he caught sight of his parents at the terminal waiting for him.

“How was your flight?” Jayendrabhai asked, helping Vijay with one of the smaller bags while Shantiben held his jacket. “Did you meet anyone?”

“Nope. No marriage material on board!” Vijay smiled wanly, joking to mask his feelings of uneasiness. “I guess we’ll still need to go to this convention after all, huh?”

As they approached a rental car that had an array of dead bugs stuck to the portion of the windshield that the wipers couldn’t reach in their arc, Jayendrabhai said, “We arrived here early and already picked up the matrimonial convention materials this afternoon.”

Shantiben handed an envelope to Vijay from the front seat. She said, “Here, take a look.”

Emblazoned in red in all capital letters on the front of the envelope was the phrase ‘INFORMATIONAL PACKET FOR MATRIMONIAL CANDIDATES.’ Vijay thought perhaps it would have been more appropriate to have labeled it an information packet for those who were ‘STILL DISAPPOINTINGLY SINGLE’ or ‘UNABLE TO FIND SPOUSE ON OWN.’ He opened the envelope from one end finding three badges inside. One badge had his name in large block letters with his age and hometown listed below. The other two were in his parents’ name with a blue dot in the corner of each. Evidently, as Vijay’s father explained, this indicated that they had a son who was single if anyone was interested in talking to them.

The envelope also contained a spreadsheet that listed all the matrimonial candidates who would be attending the convention. Included were names and phone numbers of each attendee along with their height, weight, education, occupation, and age. It, in one sense, was symbolic, Vijay thought with a negative attitude, in that it was easy for parents to evaluate all the data and make comparisons amongst the matrimonial candidates as if they were nothing more than mere inventory. This feeling of being nothing more than just an entry in a spread sheet seemed especially true when he realized that over ninety percent of the listed attendees were Patels, and that there were no less than three other Vijay Patels attending the convention.

“So what do you guys think about all this? Do you think it’ll be any good?” Vijay asked, hopeful for some kind of confirmation to make him feel better about it all.

“Do not worry Vijay. We met many parents there earlier today who all are being excited to have their daughters meet you! It will be fust class!” Shantiben tried to reassure him as they drove to the hotel.

Needless to say, Vijay didn’t feel any better.

16

The Meet Market—Day One of Fun

The matrimonial convention was being held at a large convention hall a short shuttle ride away from the hotel that Vijay, his parents, and the other convention attendees were staying in. As they approached the convention building the next morning, Vijay could see an electronic scrolling sign listing all of the events being held for that weekend. Every ten seconds or so flashing in bright lights like a Las Vegas casino was the message ‘The Greater Orlando Convention Center Welcomes the Gujarati Matrimonial Convention.’ Comically, following that message was a blinking ‘The Greater Orlando Convention Center is Pleased to Host the Harley Davidson Motorcycle Show.’

It was indeed quite a juxtaposition of two different crowds getting out of various shuttles that had arrived at the front convention hall entrance from a number of the surrounding hotels. On the one hand, there were Indian families with the fathers in their slacks and work dress shirts, the mothers not far behind wearing saris and gold jewelry, and the reluctant sons and daughters bringing up the rear, all walking quietly as if they were part of a funeral procession. At the same time there were leather clad and well bearded men with naked women tattoos accompanied by biker chicks in Daisy Dukes that were too short, hair that was too big, and halter tops that seemed too tight, walking up the same paths to the front entrance, just as loud and rambunctious as the Indian families were quiet.

Vijay and his family followed a group of people who weren’t wearing leather and came to a registration table. Behind they could see the entrance to a room that was only one-quarter full because it was still early. There were also a number of booths that had been set up along the periphery hallways. Evidently, with any function like the matrimonial convention, the organizers had solicited the local businesses to help fund the event in return for the opportunity for them to sell their wares and services. As a result, there were an assortment of clothing, jewelry, and insurance booths set up for potentially new business generated from the largely out of town convention attendees.

“Let’s sit down and go through this list,” Jayendrabhai said, having taken the list of eligible females from Vijay. He pulled out a red pen that he no doubt planned to use to mark the desirable candidates.

Vijay was embarrassed at the concept of doing that, not wanting to have any part in such a targeted marketing process. “Go ahead,” he told his parents. “Make out your list of girls you think I should marry. I’m going to walk around.” Vijay left them sitting there, too preoccupied evaluating the attendees on paper to even listen to him and his desire to meet the attendees in person.

Walking back outside to the hallway, he started on one end and surveyed the scene. Everywhere around him there were people that he had never met or seen in his life. Although a part of this excited him, another part felt like he needed the comfort of having at least someone for company. He sought that comfort near one booth where a large thermometer with the words ‘Matrimonial Thermometer’ was printed neatly on top. It was in front of this booth that he had spotted Megha.

He called her name and she turned around and looked at him, her eyes lighting up as she answered, “Vijay! It’s so nice to see another familiar face here!”

“Believe me, I know what you mean!” Vijay replied with empathy. “So what’s this?” he asked, pointing to the big thermometer on the wall.

“That’s the matrimonial thermometer,” she said with raised eyebrows. “It’s like a telethon. They have a goal for thirty marriages to come out of this matrimonial convention and they’re asking everyone to do their part to help make it happen!”

Vijay rolled his eyes and shook his head. What had they gotten themselves into? He then looked up at her and smiled, “At least I’m glad I found you. I have someone to suffer through this with now.” He then looked around and asked, “So, are you here alone too?”

“No,” she answered. “A friend of mine is here with me. Her name is Komal. She lives in Orlando and had no excuse for not coming to the convention so she forced me to come along. In fact, there she is over there,” Megha pointed to a woman talking to some uncles and aunties on the other side of the room. She was about five foot nine and was a striking figure, especially compared to the other shorter India women around her.

“She’s beautiful,” Vijay commented.

“She’s available. The only thing is that she’s two years older than me. What do you think? Should I play matchmaker?” Megha hinted while nudging him.

“Not if she’s older than even you,” Vijay groaned with a laugh.

“Yeah, I don’t see you guys together either,” Megha said with a grin. “After all, she’s almost taller than you!”

“That’s a low blow!” he winced, not appreciative of the idea that he was being called short. He then looked at Megha again and said seriously, “I really am glad that you’re here.”

Before Megha could reply, Komal had rushed over from across the room. “Megha! You need to pace yourself! Don’t let that marriage thermometer pressure you into marrying the first guy that says hello to you!” Komal had a luscious southern accent that evidently had come from growing up in the South.

“Komal, this is Vijay,” Megha made the introductions, laughing.

“Hi!” she extended a friendly hand. “No hard feelings, but I don’t want Megha to be settling for less any earlier than she needs to!” she joked, realizing that Megha and Vijay were friends.

Vijay grinned and answered back, “Please, don’t be ashamed to admit it. You just want to make sure I’m available for you! I understand the game!” They all laughed and traded more barbs and as Vijay looked at both Megha and Komal, his spirits rose. He had a feeling that no matter how the convention turned out, at least the three of them would have fun and become even better friends.

A person’s voice could be heard up at the front stage asking everyone to come into the main auditorium. Vijay looked at both of them and said, “I’ll meet up with you two later. I’m going back to my parents before they marry me off to someone without even asking me!”

Vijay walked over to where his parents were sitting. Jayendrabhai looked at him with a mission in mind. “Looking at the list, there are a lot of good girls you need to meet. I have put a check mark next to the ones that look promising. I have an extra copy so we’ll keep an eye out for the girls’ parents too.” He had evidently planned for every opportunity and contingency. “There are many more girls here than boys, so I’m thinking you should set your standards higher. You are premium goods here!” he exclaimed.

“You’re sending me mixed signals, dad. Weren’t you just telling me a while back that I shouldn’t expect perfection and that I had to learn to start compromising and giving in a little?”

“But that was when I didn’t know there was such a selection!” Jayendrabhai said excitedly.

Vijay just laughed. His father sounded like a retail shopper who had just found his first factory outlet mall.

The next hour and a half of the morning involved the official kickoff to the convention. Two pandits joined the organizers on stage to give a religious invocation, beseeching for a productive and prosperous weekend. Vijay could almost imagine the matrimonial thermometer beginning to inch towards its goal based on Ganesh and other gods being asked to assist in the process. The pandits were followed by acknowledgements to the volunteers, who were also introduced as brokers of sorts, in the event anyone needed assistance in meeting someone or their parents. Finally, an interactive session was held to open the lines of communication between parents and their kids. The importance of cultural intactness was stressed upon the kids, and the importance of being more open so as to not turn off the kids to cultural intactness was stressed upon the parents. After the last presentation was completed, an announcer on stage instructed the parents to go to the Cottonwood Room and the matrimonial candidates to go to the Lewis Room for lunch. Jayendrabhai pulled out the agenda to confirm that this was true, disappointed no doubt, feeling that Vijay’s women meeting productivity would only be maximized if they were by his side pushing and urging him along. Vijay, however, felt otherwise, and was thankful that the convention planners had thought similarly.

“See you later,” Vijay, said, as he followed the younger crowd that was walking out.

“Good luck,” Shantiben called out. Jayendrabhai was still too preoccupied with the list, having pulled it out with the agenda again, to say anything. Vijay thought with a smile as he walked away, that his father was one of those who spent an intolerable amount of time putting together a perfect game plan, only to have the game be over by the time he was ready to implement it.

Following the crowd he ended up in the Lewis Room where he met up with Komal and Megha who were already in line waiting for food. People were waiting in veg or non-veg lines. Basically in both lines there were sub sandwiches, potato chips, and sodas. It was just that one line had sandwiches with lettuce, tomatoes, onions, cucumbers, and salami, and the other line had the exact same things, except there was a little extra lettuce and a lot less salami.

After filling their plates with food and potato chips, joking with each other all the while how the religious and diet gods would not look down approvingly at what they were putting on their plates, they sat down in the middle of a long table. Having taken only one bite, Komal put her sandwich down abruptly and called out loudly to someone across the room behind Vijay.

“Milan! Over here,” she waved vigorously, beckoning him to join them. A guy, slightly taller than Vijay with long wavy hair, glasses, and an easy smile dressed in a J Crew style walked over with plate and drink in hand.

“Hey Komal! Megha!” he said hello to them. “I’m glad I found you! This place is just swimming in Indians!”

Komal introduced Milan to Vijay. “Vijay, this is one of my younger cousins. Milan’s from Seattle.”

“Hey, nice to meet you,” Vijay shook his hand. “And I mean that because up to now, all I’ve been hearing is how cute the guys are at the convention. At least now I’ll have someone to rate the women that are here!” Vijay joked.

“Definitely!” Milan said with a grin, as he sat down next to Vijay.

“So tell me, have you ever been to one of these conventions before?” Vijay asked him after taking a couple of sips from his drink.

“No,” Komal answered on his behalf because he had taken a bite out of his sandwich just as Vijay had asked the question, “Milan’s the youngest cousin in the family and is just starting this whole process. But don’t worry honey,” she spoke to Milan, “I’ll teach you the ropes, we all know that I’ve been doing it long enough!”

“Believe me, I’ve been happy about that too!” Milan laughed. He then turned to Vijay, “You see, as long as she’s looking, the attention’s on her and not on me!”

“Speaking of which,” Vijay said, “I keep getting this feeling that I’m being stared at wherever I go. Am I crazy?”

“I know what you mean,” Milan said in understanding. “I’ve been feeling like I’m a piece of meat ever since I got here, too. Don’t get me wrong, it’s okay when women are doing it! But it’s so bizarre when its the parents and grandparents who stare at you!”

“I hope you guys don’t think you’re anything special!” Megha chided them, trying to keep their heads from getting too big from the attention they felt that they were attracting. “The parents just want to get your name off your name tag so that they can look you up on the spread sheet and decide whether their daughter should meet you or not. After they figure out who you guys are, you’ll be invisible, believe me!”

“Well, if that’s the case, maybe I should just put this stupid name tag over the zipper of my pants so they’ll be too embarrassed to even look down there!” Vijay said jokingly.

“I’m with you,” Milan agreed laughing. “In fact, I’m just going to keep mine in my pocket. If people want to get to know me, maybe now they’ll make the effort rather than running back to one of their spreadsheets!”

Vijay thought that a good plan and took his name tag off as well in a show of solidarity. Maybe, if anything, that would encourage more women to come talk to him because at least they would have genuine questions to start off a conversation, such as “What’s you name?” “Where are you from?” and “Where’s your name tag?”

Lunch ended and Vijay looked at the packet of information Megha had brought to find out about the next event. There was a social hour planned where people were supposed to try and meet one another.

“So I don’t get it. How does this work?” Vijay asked Komal, the resident matrimonial convention veteran.

“I’m not sure. But I bet it’s some time they’ve set aside so the parents can try to meet the parents of the worthy ‘name tags’ if you know what I mean,” she intimated.

“Oh brother!” Vijay groaned. He could just imagine that his parents, in their zeal, had probably already put together a long list of women and their parents that they’d want him to meet. It suddenly felt like it was going to be a long afternoon.

Vijay walked back into the main room and found his parents talking to two people. They had already started, groaned Vijay to himself. As soon as he was in sight, Jayendrabhai motioned for him to come over to them. He evidently wanted to introduce Vijay to the couple with whom they were talking.

Before Vijay could even let out a hello, Jayendrabhai introduced to the others, “This is our younger son, Vijay.”

“Hi. How are you?” The man said bowing his head. He wore a brown cardigan sweater that looked a little frayed over blue slacks. The woman, who appeared to be his wife, bobbed her head in synchronicity, without saying anything and smiling broadly like a Cheshire cat. She was overweight and wore a crimson sari that exposed her midriff. All Vijay could think was that if they had a daughter, any guy that was introduced to her would only look at the mother and fear for the future.

“Fine. It’s nice to meet you.” Vijay bobbed his head in response. He had never met them before.

“This is Kanu and Manisha. Manisha and I went to college together long time ago,” explained Shantiben.

Vijay decided to play psychic and predicted that Kanu uncle and Manisha auntie had a daughter that they wanted him to meet.

“Kanu and Manisha have a daughter,” Shantiben said leadingly to him. Bingo, thought Vijay.

“Yes, have you been meeting Priya? She’s short with long hair.” Manisha auntie provided a description that was not very descriptive. After Vijay shook his head no, she continued, “She is going to come here any minute and I was telling your parents that I would love for you to meet her. Oh there she is now!” Manisha auntie said, pointing to someone at the door behind Vijay. “Priya!” she motioned for her loudly and urgently to come over, almost as if Vijay were a blue-light special at K-Mart that was soon to expire.

Vijay was surprised when he saw her. From behind him came a petite woman who fit more in the mold of a model from Bebe as opposed to Lane Bryant. She had long straight hair that she wore up to accentuate her graceful neck. She had lively eyes with a smile that always seemed turned on.

“Hello,” she said pleasantly, generally nodding in Vijay and his parents’ direction.

“Priya, this is Jayendra uncle and Shantie auntie, and their son Vijay.”

Vijay just waved a hello not shaking her hand or anything. After all, parents were around. Any body contact might be construed as a signal for marriage.

She waved shyly back, shrugged her shoulders and smiled some more as her parents then proceeded to talk to his parents while they just looked at each other silently. Vijay couldn’t believe it. Here was the first girl that his parents introduced him to at the convention and she seemed pleasantly attractive.

Unfortunately, they were unable to speak another word because within a few minutes another uncle-auntie couple had, without any invitation, joined them, actually bumping Manisha auntie, Kanu uncle and sadly, Priya, on to other families making introductions. The new couple, too, had a daughter in tow for Vijay to meet.

“Hello, my name is Bhupendra, this is my wife Sushila, and this is our daughter Vandana.” Bhupendra uncle was over six feet tall and carried himself in a manner which indicated to Vijay that Bhupendra uncle knew what he wanted and usually got it by being louder than anyone else. He wore a silk collarless shirt with the top two buttons open exposing a shiny gold necklace around his neck. Sushila auntie was much shorter and much quieter, no doubt satisfied in her husband talking for both of them. Their daughter Vandana, on the other hand, appeared to be a pleasant cross between the two. Like Priya, Vandana was pretty, although her look was entirely different. She was dressed in an all-black outfit with a purple scarf tied around her neck. Her hair, short by most people’s standards, appeared attractive on her and seemed to suggest a progressive spirit inside her. Despite this western appearance, she seemed content in her father making the introduction, merely waving a hello as had Priya.

“Kemcho, my name is Jayendra,” answered Vijay’s father, “and this is my wife Shanti and my son Vijay.”

“Yes, Vandana had seen Vijay in the room and said she wanted to meet him.” Vijay immediately took notice, his ego having been inflated faster than an airbag on impact while Vandana changed a shade or two in color at the embarrassment of that fact being made public. “And when we were registering, we saw Vijay’s name on the spreadsheet and we knew then that we definitely had to meet the family!” Bhupendra uncle said, further inflating Vijay’s ego. They, too, like Vijay’s parents, had gone through the spreadsheet with a red marker picking out boys that they wanted their daughter to meet, and Vijay evidently had made the “A” list. “Vandana is in pediatrics, finishing her residency, and I was just telling Sushila that it will be good to talk to parents who have kids who are in medicine. That way the families understand what the kids have to go through with working and everything.”

“I know,” Shantiben said. “We were happy when Rohit, our older son, first became a physician, but when I saw how much he had to work, I just could not be believing it!”

“Rohit?” Sushila auntie asked, perplexed at first. She then opened her eyes in admiration and said, “Wow! Both of your sons are doctors! You must be very proud of both of them, such a fine job you have been doing!”

Something then began to dawn on Vijay as to what was happening in the conversation.

“We of course are very proud of both our sons, but only Rohit is a doctor. Vijay,” Jayendrabhai pointed to him proudly, “is a corporate lawyer in Los Angeles.”

“Wait a minute!” Bhupendra uncle said, flustered, as he pointed to Vijay while talking to his father. “Isn’t he Vijay Patel from Pittsburgh, reference number 443? I saw the name tag on the table. The neurosurgeon, correct?”

Vijay looked at his parents and then Bhupendra uncle, and sheepishly took out his name tag from his pocket which stated that he was one of the other Vijay Patels attending the convention, the lawyer from Los Angeles, reference number 442, the one who wasn’t the doctor.

It was that last part about not being a doctor that dramatically changed how Bhupendra uncle and Sushila auntie acted. Whereas before, they appeared willing to wait for hours to talk and get to know Vijay and his family, now they appeared anxious to beat a hasty departure to find the other Vijay Patel. They then shamelessly said good bye, making apparent that their only interest in talking to them in the first place was so that they could introduce their successful doctor daughter to a successful doctor husband.

The rest of the social event was fairly uneventful in comparison. Vijay began to feel that this wasn’t necessarily the best way for him to meet someone as he followed along with his parents, this time with his name tag on in plain view after a stern look from them. Even with Priya, who seemed like she could be someone he might want to get to know, he hadn’t the opportunity to do anything more than wave at her because her parents did all of the talking. He needed to break away from them and find Rocky. Perhaps then, real progress would be made.

After a half an hour, his parents left to go back to the hotel while Vijay stayed behind. Walking around the hallway past the booths set up on the periphery of the Cottonwood Room, he spotted Milan with two other guys sitting on facing couches near the front talking in animated fashion and laughing loudly. Milan saw Vijay walking down the corridor and waved for him to come join them.

“Hey Vijay! Come here,” said Milan. “I want you to meet some people.” Vijay walked over to where they were sitting. Milan introduced Vijay to two of his friends. The first guy was Jaymin who stood over six feet tall, was dressed in cords and a polo shirt and looked very athletic with short cropped hair. The second guy was Sam, who although he looked athletic as well, was as short as Jaymin was tall. Both were energetic and friendly and made Vijay feel welcome right away.

“So what are you guys up to?” Vijay asked.

“We were just doing some strategizing right now to figure out how to meet women at this convention,” said Jaymin.

“That’s easy,” Vijay said, speaking from experience, “Tell everyone you’re a doctor and they’ll be lining up with their parents wanting to meet you!” He then joined them by sitting down on one of the couches next to Milan as they faced Jaymin and Sam sitting on the couch opposite of them. “Why, do you guys have a better plan?”

“That’s what I was just trying to figure out,” said Milan.

It actually was quite comical when Vijay looked on the table separating the two couches. Strewn about were diagrams hastily drawn as if they had just come out of a CBS Sports telestrator during a football game, evidently documenting how they were planning to approach certain women at the convention.

Sam explained, “We’ve had a good look around today, so we know who we want to target. Now it’s just a matter of execution, which is what we’re working on here.”

“Okay,” Jaymin crouched over the table looking at them, “Ms. Bombay is with two not so attractive cousins, so I need suicide disruptive blocking if I’m going to be talking to her. Who’s with me?”

Vijay interrupted him. “Ms. Bombay? Who’s named that?” It seemed like a cruel name to be stuck with for an Indian woman. He almost wanted to ask if she was going to change her name to Ms. Mumbai now that the name of the city had changed, but thought better of it.

“That’s our name for this girl Sam and I ran into in the hallway when we first got here. She’s awesome! You must’ve seen her. She’s wearing this funky black outfit and had a purple scarf tied around her neck,” described Jaymin with admiration.

“Oh you mean Vandana,” Vijay said with recognition and little emotion, still stinging from the hasty departure of her parents.

“Wait, you’ve met and actually talked to Ms. Bombay?” Sam asked, sitting straighter in the couch. He evidently had some interest in her and wanted to hear every detail.

“Yeah, she came up to me and my folks with her parents to introduce herself,” Vijay hinted only to how he “was the man” when it came to having women interested in him, offering no further embarrassing details as to why they had left. “But why do you call her Ms. Bombay?” Vijay asked.

“You’ve got to do that or people will hear and know who we’re talking about,” explained Jaymin patiently, no doubt having already explained it to Milan. “She went to medical school back in Bombay and so that’s why we gave her that name.”

“You guys are too much!” laughed Vijay. He found it funny the great lengths they were going to in order to meet women at the convention. Just as his parents had their approach, so did these guys, albeit altogether different but yet still highly organized.

As the four of them continued to form strategies and describe women that they all had met and thought were attractive, giving each of them code names for future reference, Vijay looked over across the room and caught sight of Rocky waiting in line to pick up his badge and other registration materials.

“Hey guys, there’s my roommate checking in,” he pointed to Rocky. “I’ll catch up with you all later tonight and maybe we can meet Red, White, and Blue,” said Vijay laughing, referring to three women that seemed to hang out together during the morning session, each of whom wore some clothing that matched a component of the US flag.

They were now only waiting for a cute friend to join the girls’ group so that they could call her the Star.

Rocky smiled when he saw Vijay approach. “Hey, what’s up buddy? You look like you’ve been having a little too much fun from the grin on your face.”

“It’s been all right, although I’m sure it’ll even be better now that you’re here. Have you been to the hotel yet? I was thinking of going back and crashing until tonight.”

“I’m not going back to the room for a while. I’ve already taken a quick shower and came here to pick up my registration materials and my badge. Then, I’ve actually got to meet someone here,” he said the last line slightly evasively.

“Rocky, the one thing I’ve learned is that you don’t come here to meet some-one. You come here to meet some-many,” joked Vijay.

“With lines like that you are going to end up with some-no-one,” Rocky laughed back. He then explained that he had started talking to a woman named Tejal a few months ago and how things seemed to be going well from what he could tell.

“Oh that’s right,” Vijay now remembered. “Is this the woman you had told me wanted to meet you here rather than fly to California?”

“Yeah, she’s the one,” Rocky confirmed. “Anyways, we’ve been talking on and off for a while now,” he gave his ID card to the person at the registration table, “and it’s scary. A while back, I called her at midnight and we just kept talking. And before I knew it, my alarm went off. We had talked for seven hours!”

“Wow, that’s awesome! But wait a minute, how come you haven’t been sharing this all with me?” Vijay demanded. This was the first he was hearing about how serious it was getting.

Rocky sighed and said “To start with, I don’t know if anything is going on so there isn’t really anything to say. Some conversations are great, like I told you, but then weeks may go by before we talk again. Besides, I think I probably didn’t mention it to you, or anyone for that matter, because I’m tired of telling everyone about my failures. If it didn’t work out, people would just tell me I’m being too picky again. I figured if I did this quietly, nobody would know if things didn’t work out except me.”

“I understand,” Vijay responded. “But still, you know you can always talk to me if you want to.”

“I know. But I’m telling you. I’m done with all of this talking business. I want to start doing.”

“All right then,” Vijay said, “Starting now. Go find her. I’ll meet you at dinner, but I’ll want a full report.”

“Deal,” he agreed, and then walked away to meet Tejal.

Vijay went through the open doors at the front entrance, climbing into a waiting shuttle. As the door closed and the shuttle started to leave the area, Vijay leaned his head against the window and stared at the convention hall hoping that fate had finally taken a change of heart for Rocky and that all his doing would finally leave him something good to talk about.

After taking a nap, Vijay dressed in slacks and a sweater and met up with his parents in the hotel lobby. Shantiben looked at him and although she said nothing, she was obviously wondering why her son was not wearing one of the many suits she had told him to bring. Vijay, however, knew that wearing a suit would only make him a painfully obvious matrimonial candidate which although might impress his and other parents, would make him little headway with the women he hoped to meet that night.

He looked around in the reception area once they arrived at the convention center. Although there were parents and some kids present, they didn’t hang out with each other as much anymore. It was almost as if the parents felt like they had done all the pushing that they possibly could and now it was their time to hang out with their friends, no doubt to swap matrimonial war stories about their difficult sons and daughters. Neither Vijay nor his parents, unfortunately, had a crowd to join and therefore they kept each other company as they surveyed the scene with plates full of appetizers in hand. Vijay hoped to find a friendly face which would allow him to break off from them, but he had no such luck.

After a while, an announcement was made that dinner was being served, with the parents eating in a different room than the matrimonial candidates. Vijay left his parents and walked to the Hoover Room where a long line had formed at the front entrance. Evidently, the organizers had assigned tables for each person.

As Vijay approached the front of the line, a volunteer informed him that he was assigned to table 15. Wanting to know how Rocky’s visit with Tejal had gone, he also found out that Rocky was assigned to table 88 which was in an adjoining room. Once inside, however, he didn’t even have time to look for Rocky because a volunteer on stage requested everyone to take their seats so that dinner could start. Up to now, cliques of friends were trying hard not to be broken up by standing in the aisles giving each other comfort. They were now reluctantly being forced apart to go to their randomly assigned seats.

Vijay abandoned his search for Rocky with a sigh and headed towards his table. There was already one woman sitting. Vijay exchanged brief nods of acknowledgement before joining her. The woman was dressed in business casual attire, wearing a black pant suit with a plain cream blouse. She had an angelic face with cherub cheeks. But unfortunately, the pudgy look hadn’t stopped there. She was a little overweight, perhaps wearing the color black in the hopes that it indeed was slimming. Before Vijay and the woman could even introduce themselves to each other properly, two other women and another guy joined them completing the table.

“Should we go around and do introductions?” asked Vijay. The table had been fairly silent after each person’s cursory hellos when they had sat down. Evidently nobody was up for taking on the chore of being the host so he obliged. “My name is Vijay. I’m from California and this is my first convention.” He then looked to the woman to his left that had been seated at the table first.

The pudgy woman in the black pant suit appeared to think the idea of everyone introducing themselves to the table to be a good one and complied. “Hi everyone. My name is Dipali and I’m from Evanston which is a suburb outside of Chicago. This is my second convention. I didn’t go to the one last year, but I went to the one in Atlanta the year before.” Dipali then looked to the woman to her left.

“Hello, my name is Sonal,” the next woman continued the introductions. “Sonal Patel, that is, but I guess that’s no shocker,” she joked. Ever since Sonal had sat down, Vijay’s estimation of the potential for the table had skyrocketed. She was strikingly beautiful with green eyes, a charming smile, and flawless alabaster skin. As pudgy and featureless as Dipali was, Sonal was well proportioned with every aspect of her having perfect definition. Even her hair, parted on the side, cascaded down to her shoulders in auburn waves. Sonal continued “I’m from Denver and this is actually my fifth and probably last convention.”

“Wow! You’ve been to five of these!?” Dipali interrupted, amazed at Sonal having attended all of the conventions since they had been started.

“I have,” Sonal admitted. “In fact, I’ve been to so many that my friends call me matrimonial convention trash!” Everyone laughed. Sonal had a sparkling personality that matched a sweet smile. She then looked to her left as a cue for the next woman to introduce herself.

“Hey everyone, I’m Aarti,” she pronounced her name in a nasally voice so that it sounded like the letters “RD”. She had dressed up for the occasion a bit too much thought Vijay, wearing a black outfit that was hidden by a myriad of gold lammee and embroidery. When he first saw her in that outfit, he wanted to ask her if she had just come from some flashy Vegas show, but thought better of it. Her hair was big, immovable from hair spray, and filled with rust colored highlights. And as for the makeup, for some women, it can do wonders, but for others, it was just a hopeless face painting exercise. Aarti fit into the latter category. “I’m from Jersey, and well it’s my first convention, and I’m not so sure about all of this yet because I feel like I already know a lot of the people because they live in the same area and went to the same schools that I did.”

After a brief moment of silence, Vijay looked to the guy sitting to his immediate right and to Aarti’s left. He asked him, “So, what about you?”

Up to now, he had sat there quietly, almost as if he were replaying in his mind the speech he was going to have to give when his turn came. Now that he was in the spotlight he looked remarkably uncomfortable. He was dressed in a bright, multi-colored shirt that was tucked into tightly fitting pants. He had greasy hair, shining in the light, smelling of recently applied coconut oil. Vijay looked at him and suspected that his H-1 work visa was no doubt freshly issued. “Hello, my name is Jigar. My village is Uttersanda. I finished my CS degree and work in San Jose. I moved to America two years ago.” Evidently there was nothing else coming out of Jigar. He was painfully quiet and shy.

“So, have you been to one of these conventions before Jigar?” Vijay asked.

“No, this is my first one,” he offered. “My parents are still being in India, but my relatives have decided it is time for me to look for a wife because I have job and so I am coming with them. Hopefully I will find someone this weekend,” he ended without much confidence in his voice.

Again, there was an awkward silence. Vijay felt sorry for Jigar. It seemed like he was out of his element at this social setting. Before he could think any more of it, the food arrived, providing for an appropriate break of attention away from Jigar. Everyone ate family style sharing big bowls of shaak, papad, naan, raita, and daals helping themselves to a traditional Thanksgiving Indian dinner, which meant a dinner no different than many of them ate every night while growing up.

As they passed food around a guy walked up to Dipali and tapped her on the shoulder.

“Dipali? Hey, it is you! Remember me? Yogesh.” The guy had longish hair with bangs and silver eyeglasses. He was tall and very skinny which was further highlighted by the fact that the collar of the shirt he was wearing was much too big for the circumference of his neck.

“Oh Yogesh, right, I remember. How’re you doing?” Dipali said vaguely, without much elation.

“I’m fine. It’s good to know you’re here at the convention too! We should catch up later,” he said, extending his thumb and pinkie in his left hand in Hollywood agent fashion to make the shape of a phone. After a brief moment of silence, it seemed apparent that the conversation was not going anywhere and that she probably wouldn’t be catching up with him later. Sensing dead air and a feeling of awkwardness, he thankfully ended the torture by saying “Well, I’d better get back to my table” and left.

After Yogesh had walked away, Vijay said laughing, “Wow, what’s all this smoke around here? Oh, I know! It’s from Yogesh being shot down!”

The whole table laughed and naturally wanted more details regarding the connection between the two of them. After a couple of “you don’t want to hear about thats”, Dipali sighed, finally relenting. “A couple of years ago I was set up to meet him while he was visiting relatives in town. Since he didn’t have a car, I had to go pick him up. We went to this small restaurant and we had an okay time. It wasn’t perfect or anything. Anyways, when the bill came, he took his wallet out and then only paid for half. Can you believe that!? I didn’t have enough money with me because I just expected that he was going to pay for dinner. The worst thing was that he didn’t have enough money for the dinner either and the restaurant didn’t take credit cards. I ended up having to leave him there and had to drive to a teller machine to get money. It was such a nightmare!” she whined.

“Oh, that must have been so awful!” Sonal lamented, mentally imagining Yogesh having to wait at the restaurant, constantly reassuring the waiter that they intended to pay the bill, wondering all the while if Dipali was going to come back with the necessary cash.

Vijay interrupted. “I have a question for the women. Do you always expect the guy to pay for everything on these set-ups?”

“Of course,” Dipali replied immediately, no doubt having fresh in her mind her experience with Yogesh.

“Well,” Sonal replied with a little more thought, “I’ve always offered and have no problem paying for half. But usually the guy will insist. I guess, thinking about it, I feel like it’s not a good sign if he doesn’t offer to pay for the whole thing though. After all, he is asking me out.”

Vijay looked at her, love struck, and thought that was the least a guy could do if he had the chance to go out with someone as beautiful as her. He then snapped out of his reverie, realizing there were less attractive women at the table. “Hold on now!” He felt the guys’ interests needed adequate representation and Jigar probably would not be much assistance in that regard. “This is a set up after all. Isn’t it a mutual ask-out kinda thing?”

“That’s true, I guess. I’m just an old fashioned girl,” Sonal tried to offer justification for her position but could only point to traditional gender roles.

“I just feel like the guy should always pay,” Aarti agreed with Dipali. “Why? Do you think it should be any different?” she asked Vijay.

Vijay thought for a moment as to how he wanted to prepare his defense. He then stated, “To start with, I think it’s wrong for women to expect the guy to always pay. But at the same time, I always pay and never split the bill.”

“See. That’s what normal guys always do,” Dipali interjected.

Vijay shook his head in disagreement to indicate that he hadn’t yet completed his thought. “But…if a woman insists on paying and if the date is going well, I just say that she can pay for coffee or dessert somewhere else. Or if anything, I just say she can pay next time. This way I’ve got my foot in the door for that second date!” he revealed with a sly grin.

Several agreed with Vijay’s approach while others did not. But it was enough to start a spirited conversation generally focused on whether it was better to be the guy or the girl not only in the arranged marriage situation, but in life in general.

After several rounds of comical debate, including whether a woman’s periodic waxing of her moustache was more painful than a guy having to shave his moustache every day, Dipali said laughing and with a sigh, “I have to admit, when I found out about this assigned seating thing, I wasn’t too happy about having to sit with a bunch of strangers. But now that I’ve met you all, I realize this was a great thing. I probably would not have spoken to any of you otherwise.”

“I know,” Sonal agreed. “The way they’ve done this first dinner night has changed a lot. I remember when I first came to one of these the parents had dinner with their kids. Needless to say, nobody was meeting anyone that night. Then a few years back they separated the kids from the parents, which helped a lot. But you still saw most of the people just sitting with their friends, not bothering to mingle. But this assigned tables thing kind of forces you to meet new people.”

No sooner had Sonal finished her sentence when two other women dressed to the same level and style as Aarti came with chairs to sit at their table. One of the women said, “You guys looked like you were having a good time so we wanted to join you.” Everyone scootched over making room for them to fit at the table.

Aarti made the introductions, “These are my friends Manisha and Trushita. They’re from Jersey too.”

“We were just talking about how this assigned seating is such a good thing because it makes you meet new people and breaks up cliques, and here you come busting that theory,” Vijay laughed at them after everyone had been introduced.

“Well,” Manisha spoke, “it’s easy for you to say. I was at such a loser table. Nobody had anything to say. And then I went over to Trushita’s table, which was just a bunch of twenty year old guys with their beepers and earrings looking to get drunk and party.”

“Maybe this assigned table thing has some kinks that need to be worked out still,” Vijay sympathized with a smile.

“You know what they should do next year to make this better?” Dipali said. “They should first of all make sure there are an even number of guys and girls at each table.”

“It would be nice,” agreed Sonal. “I even suggested that at an earlier convention. But the reason that doesn’t happen is because if you look around, you’ll see that there are a lot more women that are at this convention than there are guys.”

After further discussions on how to improve seating at dinner, someone came up with the suggestion that at least people of the same age should be put at tables together.

“But wouldn’t that be hard to do though?” Vijay asked.

“No, not at all,” Jigar finally contributed to the conversation. “The whole spreadsheet is on Microsoft Excel and it has everyone’s numerical birth dates on it. So all they would have to do is an automated sort and then just fill the tables. Very easy.” He was in his element now. Computers. He could talk freely and comfortably. Unfortunately, dinner was over and people had started to stand up and mill around.

Vijay, however, was actually looking forward to speaking more with Sonal on an individual basis.

“So what do we do now?” Aarti asked Sonal, who had been anointed as the expert given her previous convention experience.

“It’s time to go meet people. You never know, that perfect person might be out there for each of you. I know mine is,” Sonal said, pointing to a tall guy talking to three other guys at the other side of the room. “That’s Atul. We just got engaged two weeks ago.” Bombshells went off in Vijay’s head. Engaged? What was she doing here then? He for the first time noticed the ring on her finger. Although he was normally perceptive about things like that, he had not bothered to even look. After all, it was a matrimonial convention wasn’t it?

“So why are you here?” Dipali asked the question that Vijay had burning on his mind.

“Yeah,” Aarti added laughing, “Are you really matrimonial convention trash?”

“Believe me, if I had my choice I wouldn’t have come!” Sonal defended herself. “But that fool Atul waited till just recently to propose. But by then we each had already booked tickets to come and they don’t allow refunds, so we thought what the heck, it would be nice to come here with no pressure to meet people.”

“That’s great! Congratulations!” Vijay said, hiding his disappointment at the lost opportunity.

“It’s much better coming this way. We’ve made a lot of friends at the conventions so it gives us a chance to at least see them one more time and say good bye properly,” Sonal offered another benefit to coming.

“Kind of like a farewell tour?” Dipali asked.

“Yes, exactly. But I’d better go and make sure my fiancée doesn’t meet someone new and change his mind!” She rose and left. Soon the other girls left as well to powder their noses and apply extra hair spray no doubt.

Vijay stood up and said to Jigar, who was the only one left at the table. “I’ve got to go find some of my friends. I’ll see you around. I hope you meet someone nice.”

“Yes. I must go find my family too. They said they would need to see me after dinner so that we could start meeting girls.” He was going to meet women with his family with him, thought Vijay. Surely this convention was not for the likes of someone like Jigar.

Vijay walked away and moved in the general direction of the adjoining room where Rocky’s table should have been located. He was anxious to talk to him to find out how his visit with Tejal had turned out. As he made his way through the crowds he spotted Megha.

“What’s going on?” he walked up along side her. “How was your dinner? Or I guess, more importantly, how was your dinner company?”

The look on her face was indication enough. Evidently, her table consisted of a guy who was available, but who wasn’t eligible. Vijay told her his table was the exact opposite, with a woman who was very eligible, but unfortunately no longer available.

“Maybe Komal had better luck. Where is she?” Vijay asked.

“I don’t know. She was supposed to be at table 88, wherever that is.”

“Oh hey! That’s Rocky’s table. Let’s go to the next room and see what they’re up to. I bet at least the two of them are having some fun,” said Vijay. They continued walking through the crowds and had gotten no farther than the center of the room when they ran into Komal.

“There you are!” Komal said at the sight of Megha. She, too, evidently had been looking for them after dinner. Megha explained how her and Vijay’s tables lacked potential.

“My dinner was a total dud, too,” Komal commiserated. It was just me and three other women. The girls were nice and we’ll probably be friends and everything now, but hello? I’m not a lesbian so that ratio does nothing for me!”

“I don’t understand,” Vijay said, perplexed. “My friend was at table

88. I wonder why he wasn’t at least there.” “Was his name Rakshit?” Komal asked. “Yeah. Rocky. Did you talk to him?” “No. I never met him. By the time I got there, the girls were telling

me that the one guy at the table left after only a few minutes. They

were wondering if they were doing something to scare off men.”

“Hmm. I wonder where he went off to?” Vijay thought to himself.

Just then, a volunteer’s voice rang out through the room. “Please

everyone. Once you have finished dinner, go outside for the party tonight. There will be a music disco program in the Hunter Room at ten o’clock. Bring your badge and identification that shows you are over 21 years old. We will not be letting you in if you don’t have this proper identification.”

The three of them walked outside and sat down on a comfortable green couch in the main reception area for the hotel. After a while people started to pore out and began to head to the other room where the party was beginning.

“We should probably get up,” Vijay groaned, although he had gotten very comfortable. “After all, our families would be greatly disappointed if we didn’t at least try to make progress.”

“It’s funny, because my parents have kinda cooled off for the moment.” Megha replied. After seeing the looks of surprise on Vijay’s and Komal’s faces, she explained, “A few months back there was a pan-dit from India visiting who was trying to raise money for some temple or something. He supposedly could tell your future by reading the lines in the palms of your hand. So, of course, my mom made me go one afternoon to visit.”

“So what’s the news?” Komal asked in anticipation.

“He said that my marriage line was very weak,” Megha replied.

“Oh no! Does that mean you’re not going to find your dream man and get married?” Vijay asked in mock horror.

“No,” Megha grinned. “Actually, what the pandit said was kind of interesting. He said that lines change. So when he was talking about my weak marriage line he was saying that even if I had met someone, the marriage or engagement would have not gone through. But he did say that it was getting strong now and that by next year my marriage line had ‘power’, especially between March and August.”

“Wow! He even gave you a pretty narrow window as to when this is going to happen!” Vijay exclaimed.

“Yeah. So it’s great because whenever my parents pressure me about this stuff, I just tell them that there’s no need to bother. After all, this pandit said nothing was going to happen until later next year anyways.”

“Well, even though your marriage line is weak, mine might be in its prime right now!” Vijay said as two very attractive women in slinky black outfits passed by. Vijay looked at them discretely, not only because he didn’t want to catch their attention with his looks, but also because he felt guilty doing so with Komal and Megha by his side. At some level, scoping out the babes with them was like trying to watch a rated “R” movie with his parents. It just didn’t feel right. He realized he should be with Rocky if he was going to be meeting those and other women. But where was Rocky?

Vijay left Komal and Megha behind on the couch with a promise to meet up with them inside. After a check of identification and a pat down search, he was let into the Hunter Room. The room was half the size of the Hoover Room and almost completely dark. A deejay played music up on stage and the temperature in the room was already hot from the crowd.

Vijay thought to himself that this wasn’t a great way to meet people because he could only barely talk or see anyone. Almost instinctively, he threaded his way to the bar to try and find friends. Through the strobe lights and the smoke Vijay caught sight of Sam and Jaymin.

“Man, I’m glad to see some familiar faces,” Vijay said loudly above the music. “What’s up fellas?”

“We’re just getting a feel for the land,” Jaymin said, taking a swig of the beer in his hand while scoping the room. He was no doubt doing his emotional “stretching” before he hit the dance floor in pursuit of women.

“How was dinner? Any new nicknames that I need to know about?” Vijay inquired with a grin.

“Definitely!” Sam replied. “We’ll have to point them out, but I met a Hollywood, Bridge, and Sly!”

“And I’ve got Mocha, Indiana Jones, and Melrose,” Jaymin added.

“I can’t wait to hear how you guys came up with those nicknames!” laughed Vijay.

“And of course, we can’t forget, Venus is here tonight,” Sam said almost ominously, giving Jaymin a knowing nod of his head.

“Venus?” Vijay asked. “This should be interesting. How did you guys come up with that one?”

“She’s someone Sam and I’ve seen at a couple of conventions ago,” Jaymin replied. “You know Venus Flytrap, well, she’s Venus Mantrap. She lures you in and you don’t even suspect it. Once you’re in her clutches, it’s all over.”

“Please tell me you’re joking,” Vijay said, finishing his drink.

“No, I’m telling you, she’s hot, but she’s got a rep. Any guy that’s with her is definitely in trouble,” Sam answered. “So the best thing to do is just steer clear of her!”

“You guys are such ladies!” Vijay laughed at them, putting his glass back on the counter.

Sam looking around from the bar, tapped Jaymin and Vijay on the shoulder and pointed to the middle of the room and said, “Don’t look now, but there she is. And no one’s around her just like we said.” Sam then looked at Vijay and asked, “Why don’t you go talk to her? Or are you part of the women’s club too?”

“Sure!” he was up to the challenge only because now he had to be after all the ribbing he had thrown their way. Besides, he thought to himself, there could be no harm in approaching her. He’d go get rejected and come back, never to see Venus Mantrap again.

Sam and Jaymin pointed to a silhouette from across the room and Vijay made his way towards her. As Vijay approached the mysterious woman from behind, something struck him as familiar about her. Could it be? Was it her?

Although her back was turned to him, it was a back he had thought he had seen before. The woman cut a striking figure in silhouette. In a room where most women were dressed in short black skirts, she wore a long white dress that went down to her ankles. The way the dress wrapped around her body, however, gave proof to the adage that sometimes less revealed was more. Vijay walked up right behind her and tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around.

“Vijay!” her eyes shined with recognition. “It’s great to see you!” she said sincerely.

“Look at you! Stunning and dressed to kill as always.” Vijay said with a smile. He then hugged her while looking over her shoulder and giving the boys a wink. From the distance he could see their jaws drop to the ground as he held her in an embrace, surviving through the process. He looked into her eyes and smiled. Venus Mantrap. He now knew her by that name as well as Madame Ex. But he also was beginning to know her as Mona Patel. And as he looked at her, he wondered. Why was there always so much controversy surrounding her when she seemed like a normal, nice person? He then thought again for a moment, and wondered if this was all part of the luring-in process that all his friends kept warning him about.

Vijay looked at her. “So what’s a girl like you doing in a place like this?” he joked.

She let go of him and answered, “Feeling out of place. I’ve forgotten how this is so not my scene. It’s just that I was going to be in town for a wedding on Saturday and so I signed up for the first couple of days. You know, one of those ‘what the heck’ decisions just so my parents didn’t bug me too much about not trying. I’ve been here for a while and you’re the only one that’s come up to me.”

“What do you mean?” Vijay asked, although based on what Sam and Jaymin told him, he perhaps understood why.

“Well, none of the guys even bother to come by. Am I that unattractive that I make them stay away?” she said sadly. Ironically, as she was saying that, three guys walked by behind her rubber necking trying to maintain their sight of her, obviously impressed.

Vijay looked at them and then her, and then shook his head in disbelief. He asked, “Are you joking?”

“I’m serious,” she said with a sigh. “I’ve been here for a while now and not one single guy has even come up to me to say hello.”

“Believe me. The guys notice you. You don’t see it, but wherever you walk you cause heads to turn.”

Mona blushed, but still wasn’t convinced.

“A simple rule to remember is that most guys are chicken. Our egos can’t take what we feel will be a certain rejection. We feel anyone who is as attractive as you are will only be trouble and not worth the rejection and heartache.”

“But I’m not like that! You know me. I’m a nice, sweet person,” she pleaded.

“Well the jury’s still out on that one. I’m still reeling from being stood up!” He joked, recalling their misadventure in New York. As he stood there, he still was trying to make sense of what he thought of her. But before he could think any more of it, he felt a tug on his sleeve that made him turn around. He stood face to face with Vandana.

“Hello,” she said, ignoring Mona all together. “I just wanted to say sorry about how my dad acted earlier today towards you and your parents. I was wondering if I could make it up to you by asking to you dance with me?”

“Uh sure,” responded Vijay instinctively. After all, if a woman who was not unattractive came up to ask for a dance, one didn’t usually turn the opportunity down. But he still wanted to talk to Mona. He turned around to give Mona the ‘sorry, there’s nothing I can do’ helpless look’ in such a way that Vandana wouldn’t see it, but Mona had already vanished into the crowd, no doubt feeling like a third wheel on a unicycle. Vandana took Vijay’s hand and led him into the heart of the dance floor. After dancing listlessly to three songs, all the time looking all around him except at Vandana, Vijay excused himself and tried to find Mona again. Instead of finding her, however, Vijay ran into Rocky who was hanging out by himself.

Rocky smiled, looking happy as ever. “What’s up buddy?” he asked over the noise of the music.

“I’m looking for some danger. But more importantly, what about you?” Vijay responded. “Wait! That’s a stupid question. Let me guess. Tejal?”

“You’re right!” he said with a sheepish grin. “I bailed out of my table before dinner to go find her.”

“All right! Give me the whole story! How did it go?” Vijay let out impatiently. “Start from the afternoon.”

Rocky said with happiness, “Vijay! She’s so awesome it’s unbelievable!”

“So she’s cute?”

“Totally! And to top it off, she’s got this Cindy Crawford mole thing going, but in the good way!” Vijay and Rocky had debated in the past on whether a beauty mole was appealing or not, coming out that if there was hair associated with it, it could no longer be deemed a “beauty” mark.

Vijay expected as much considering how goofy and love-stuck Rocky was acting. “What did you guys do?” he inquired further.

“We just went and walked around and sat at some benches outside in the hotel’s garden. I’m telling you. I’m in love,” he went on dreamily.

“So you guys were together the whole afternoon? Nice.” Vijay said.

“Actually, she’s got a lot of friends and family at the convention, so we didn’t talk for long. But it was so great. I felt like it totally clicked!” he just kept heaping favorable adjectives about her at the end of every sentence.

“Okay, okay! But I still don’t see the whole picture here,” said Vijay. “It sounds like everything went well. But I only see you here. Am I going to meet this Tejal?”

“Of course! But it’ll probably be later. After I left my table during dinner I walked around and found her with her family. They seem really nice. After a bit she told me that she had to go meet some friends she hadn’t seen in a long time. Evidently, a lot of people she knows are here that she doesn’t get to see often. So she told me she just wanted to spend this first night catching up with them again. We’ll probably hook up tomorrow.”

Alarm bells began to ring in Vijay’s mind. This didn’t sound good. But he so wanted to be wrong given how Rocky was acting that he didn’t say anything. “All right,” Vijay rationalized. “So you should have some fun with your friends tonight too!” he led Rocky to the bar, joining Sam and Jaymin who were ready to pay homage to Vijay for not only escaping Venus but also to have Ms. Bombay chase after him.

And although Vijay wasn’t much for drinking in large quantities, he looked around when they got to the bar and saw that it was something that many of the people there were doing. While that alone, wouldn’t have made him join, he felt like he needed to drink for and with Rocky tonight.

After a few drinks entered their bodies, a haze floated in around them. Images and memories blurred. Uncertainty was about. Fate did not appear to have been kind to Rocky. After all, if Tejal had liked Rocky, wouldn’t she have wanted to introduce him to her friends? Despite the clarity in the logic, Vijay wasn’t certain that Rocky was seeing clearly.

17

The Meet Market—Day Two How Do You Do

The telephone rang at 9:30 in the morning, in paired but short bursts every two seconds. Rocky raised his head, lifted his pillow, and launched it at Vijay, groaning, “Pick it up! It’s probably your parents calling you to come down to breakfast.”

Vijay jumped out of bed to try and catch the phone before the caller hung up. He cleared his throat and answered “Hello.”

“Good morning Vijay. How was your program last night?” It was his father, and at that time in the morning after a night of drinking, his father’s voice sounded painfully alert waiting for news of matrimonial progress.

“It was okay. Nothing new to report that I can think of,” Vijay said honestly. He didn’t quite remember even coming back into the room. “What time is it?”

“9:30. We wanted to let you sleep in…”

“Yes,” Vijay smiled, the thought of sleeping in sounded good.

But his father rudely finished the sentence, “…so we waited until

9:30 to call you. Mom and I are going downstairs to the club room where they have breakfast for everyone so come join us.”

“Sure, I’ll be down there in a second,” Vijay agreed reluctantly. He then hung up the phone. His head was pounding. Evidently, he had not drunk as much water as he should have to avoid the hangover he was feeling. He slowly and gingerly went into the bathroom, treading lightly, and turned on the lights. He filled a big glass of water from the bathroom sink. After drinking two thirds of it, he splashed the rest on his face, trying to wash away the ‘I’ve just woken up look’. He put on some jeans and a sweatshirt and went back into the bathroom to survey the reflection. His hair was still a mess, lopsided, flat on the side that his head had rested on while sleeping. But that was easily rectified as he put on his baseball cap. He slipped into his sneakers, grabbed his badge and keys, and left Rocky in the room snoring and oblivious to the world, thanks to Rocky’s parents’ decision not to come to the convention.

Vijay rode down the elevator alone, went to the front desk and found out where breakfast was being served. Once in the designated room, Vijay looked around and saw a simple buffet line with chai and chaywdo, an Indian variation of chex mix, for the adults, and orange juice and powdered doughnuts for the kids. Vijay spied a container full of juice and quickly poured himself a glass. After taking a sip, he turned around and surveyed the room. Ninety percent of the crowd was comprised of parents. They all looked fresh and showered, no doubt having gone to bed at 10 at night and woken up at 7 in the morning.

Vijay saw his parents and walked over to them. “Sit down,” Jayendrabhai offered the chair next to him, no doubt so that he could have complete control of the debriefing process.

“So, are you meeting any nice girls last night?” Vijay’s mother threw out the ceremonial first pitch, wresting control of the questioning process away from his father.

“Maybe. I’ve just got to get to know them better. It was so dark and loud that you really couldn’t talk or meet anyone for too long a time. And then everyone was just drinking…”

“Even girls?” Shantiben asked naively in shock. Theirs was a family that didn’t drink much, especially the women.

“Even the girls! It was a shock to me as well,” Vijay said in an ‘I can’t believe it either’ tone. “Anyways, I think it’ll be easier to meet people during the day.”

“I hope so,” Vijay’s father said, hoping his matrimonial dollars had not been spent for naught.

“So what’s going on today?” Vijay asked.

Jayendrabhai opened up a folder he was carrying and took out the three page agenda. “Well, today there are a number of seminars that we could go to. Let’s see. Estate Planning. Health and You. Tax Investing. Franchising. Motel Administration. Careers in Motels. Selling Motels. Okay, okay, enough with the motels,” Jayendrabhai muttered to himself angrily. A growing trend among a portion of the Gujarati population was to own and manage motels because it was a business that one’s extended family who came from India could work in and make significant amounts of money. However, for that portion of the Gujarati population that focused on education and career, the success of their fellow Gujarati moteliers created tension in an almost old money—new money fashion. “Oh wait a minute! That’s all for the parents. Sounds like fun, don’t you think?” he looked at Shantiben who just rolled her eyes.

“What about me? What’s planned for me?” Vijay asked impatiently.

“Let’s see,” he flipped a page. “Yes, the matrimonial candidates,” Vijay winced at that, “It says here that there will be ice breakers all morning and afternoon.”

“I’m sure it will be good. Like you said, it will be easier to talk to the girls during the day times,” Shantiben rationalized.

“Okay mom. I’m sure you’re right.”

“Good. That’s what we want to hear,” Vijay’s father said beaming again, thinking there was still a chance for the weekend not to be a total loss.

After quickly getting ready, leaving Rocky snoring as he closed the door despite his efforts to wake him, Vijay took the shuttle back to the convention center. He entered the main lobby where a crowd of people was loitering. He spotted Megha and approached her.

“So is the marriage thermometer getting any movement out of you?” Vijay asked with a playful nudge.

“There are some cute guys,” she admitted. “The only problem is that most of them are younger than I am,” Megha explained.

“Including me. You remember, I’m also younger than…” Vijay interrupted with a grin.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” she said in a ‘blah, blah, blah’ tone.

“Has Komal had any luck? Why isn’t she here?”

“No, unfortunately she had some family obligations with Milan and his family that she couldn’t escape from last night,” she replied. They walked through the main corridor of the convention center and found their way back to the Hunter Room. A small line of people had congregated at the front. Two volunteers stood by the door handing out papers and pencils causing the slowed entry into the room. Vijay and Megha each took a piece of paper and pencil and walked in.

“Human Bingo,” Megha read the words written on top of the paper out loud. “This should be interesting.”

“There are some cute girls here. It’s too bad we’re not playing Human Twister!” Vijay joked. He looked around the room. There appeared to be several hundred people in the room. He saw Jigar and a few others that he recognized, but it otherwise was largely a crowd that he had not yet met.

“Do you sense something strange here?” Megha asked, looking around.

“Yeah. It’s like a garba. All the guys are on one side and all the girls are on the other side,” remarked Vijay. “It’s like oil and water.”

“Hello everyone! My name is Manju. I’m a volunteer,” an all too perky woman in her mid twenties and barely clearing 5 feet said in a squeaky voice through a microphone that on the stand was two inches taller than her. “We were all trying to think of a fun way for people to get to know each other and for everyone to meet, and so we thought we’d have a human bingo icebreaker. On the page there are all kinds of descriptions. Your job is to try and find someone who has done one of the things listed on the page. The first guy and girl to fill it out completely will win a prize. All right, everyone, good luck and have fun!” Manju stepped away from the microphone and walked off the stage waiting for marital magic to take place.

“Actually, you know,” Vijay said to Megha, looking at the questions. “This could be fun. So, what do you have for me that’s on my sheet?” Vijay asked.

Megha looked at Vijay, “I don’t know, let me take a look. But if I’m signing yours, you’re doing the same for me!” They exchanged each other’s sheets.

“Do you know if we can sign more than one square?” Vijay asked.

“I don’t think you’re supposed to! The whole point of this is to meet new people. I could have filled out half the squares on your sheet. But then where would you be?”

“I’d be with half as many new friends,” Vijay grinned. “Come on, they haven’t said you can’t do that.”

Almost as if on cue, Manju came back on stage. “Everyone. A few rules. Each person can only sign your page once…”

“See!” Megha said.

“And guys! No trying to get other guys to sign your sheets. The whole point is that you go and try to find girls to talk to. You too, ladies! Go up to those guys and take charge if they can’t!”

“All right Megha. Watch an old pro in action,” Vijay boasted, and he walked away from the safety of her towards the female unknown.

Vijay spotted Red, White, and Blue hanging out together with their sheets in hand and he walked up to them. “Hello ladies,” he greeted them. Vijay wished at least one other guy was there with him to act as his wingman. Doing this alone was much more of a challenge.

“Hi,” they said in unison.

“I was hoping you could help me fill in my bingo sheet.” They agreed with smiles and pleasant conversations back to him. Vijay began to feel a sense of confidence of unparalleled heights. Red, White and Blue and the other women he met were all very approachable, laughing at even his stupid jokes. Evidently most of the guys at the convention had not been approaching the women so any guy, including him, received a very hospitable welcome if they took the time and had the nerve to talk to them.

After collecting several signatures, Vijay caught sight of Megha. She had just spoken to some guy who had promptly signed her sheet, and then separated from her. Megha, somehow feeling his gaze, looked over to him, raised her eyebrows and flashed a grin, waving her bingo sheet, and taunting him that she was going to finish before him. Vijay couldn’t help but laugh inside at her antics and walked up to her to compare notes.

“Hey! Did you come over to scare the guys away so I wouldn’t win?” she looked at him with feigned suspicion.

“I’m coming over as a favor to you,” Vijay said, smiling.

“Oh really?” she asked, full of sarcasm.

“Yeah. I noticed how you’re just a machine at this, going from one guy to another, getting signatures. But you’re approaching this thing all wrong. It’s not about the ten dollar bingo prize. The real reason we’re doing this is to meet people. The way you’re going about it now, it’s almost like a ‘wham, bam, thank you sir!’ Take your time and get to know the guys you’re meeting,” he counseled her.

“Normally, I would agree with you. But the truth is that most of the guys here are just not my type and like I said, they’re mostly younger than me. I can tell from the badges. So if you’ll excuse me,” she said playfully, “it is all about the bingo prize for me!”

Vijay just shrugged with a grin and walked away, running into Milan who was coming through the front door.

“Hey!” Vijay greeted him. “How’s it going? I didn’t see you last night.”

“Yeah, I’ve got some family things going on that I needed to work on. How’s this ice breaker thing working?” Milan asked somewhat distractedly.

“It’s not bad. But it’s tough doing it on my own.”

“Do you want some company for a bit?” Milan offered, focusing on Vijay.

“Sure!” Vijay agreed. “Let’s take another look around. There are so many people here, it’s tough to know where to even start.” After making a half lap around the room, Milan asked, “Anyone you want to meet in particular?”

“No. Not really,” Vijay said. “What about you?” They were on the periphery looking at all the human bingo action taking place in the center.

“To be honest with you, I wasn’t really planning to meet a lot of women here,” Milan said, although continuing to look intently at the people in the room.

Vijay stopped for a moment to focus on Milan. “Why are you even here then?” he asked. “Did you’re parents force you to come?”

“No,” Milan laughed. “It’s just that there’s this one woman that I kinda arranged to meet here. She and I met at my med school roommate’s wedding a year ago and we really got along great. We’ve been keeping in touch since, keeping it casual, and it’s nice. There were no parents chomping on the bit for progress. No having to make immediate commitments. Just time to get to know each other. Even Komal didn’t know about her until yesterday night.”

“Sounds interesting. But why of all places would you pick here to meet her again?” asked Vijay.

Milan stopped walking and faced Vijay, who because of the crowds, often trailed behind Milan. “We felt like we should meet each other’s parents, and this was an easy way to arrange that on neutral ground without raising their suspicions,” explained Milan. “I guess I still wasn’t sure if this was serious, but after being here for a while, I’m realizing how lucky I am that I’ve found her. So I told her yesterday night that we should just tell our parents everything and have our families meet. I know this will make her happy, but the thought of doing it is making me totally nervous.”

They had almost walked a full circle around the room. To Vijay, their course appeared without purpose, but it soon became apparent that this was not the case. Milan had caught sight of who he wanted to meet and was making his way towards her, taking Vijay along with him. Vijay followed his gaze for a second and saw a woman standing by herself near the stage. She was petite, but although slight of figure, she had a strong presence about her. While many people by themselves at a party would seem to be ill at ease, feeling out of place, her appearance was anything but that. It was almost as if she was choosing who could come up to her.

Where had she been? Why hadn’t Vijay run into her before? All Vijay could think was that if she wasn’t the one that Milan had been talking about, Vijay was hoping that she might be the one that he would be talking about.

Luck was not with Vijay. As soon as the woman’s eyes matched Milan’s gaze, they warmed up in recognition, and the barrier that was around her opened to allow them to approach.

“Hi,” she greeted Milan softly. He responded in kind. Vijay felt awkwardly in the way.

She looked at Vijay and then turned her gaze back to Milan. With a laugh she said, “So I see you’ve been hanging out with the guys again leaving me here all alone. You’d better be careful, I can only fend off the other men for so long!”

“Vijay,” he said with a laugh. “I’d like to introduce you to the person who has taken up so much of my time at this convention.”

“Hi,” Vijay took the woman’s hand. Her hand was small but her grip was warm and firm. “I’m Vijay.”

“Hello, Vijay,” she said sweetly, “I’m Tejal.”

As soon as she introduced herself, Vijay noticed her beauty mark and the alarm bells that Vijay had heard ominously earlier the night before began to ring again. Only this time they were incessant and unforgiving loud. There appeared to be little doubt after talking to her more that this was the same Tejal as Rocky’s Tejal. And although there was a polite conversation that took place, all Vijay could think to himself was he had finally met Rocky’s latest love. Unfortunately, Rocky, like Vijay, seemed to have met her too late after she had already fallen in love with someone else.

Vijay left Tejal and Milan and their happiness behind. He wanted to find Rocky because if Rocky didn’t know yet, he needed to know now about Milan and Tejal. Later that afternoon, after going back to the hotel room and searching the convention grounds, he found Rocky outside by a fountain, sitting on one of the benches, alone.

Vijay quietly sat down next to him. Neither of them said a word but just stared ahead at the fountain, listening to the sounds of the water as it cascaded over rocks to the center of the pool. One look at Rocky’s face and Vijay knew he wouldn’t have to tell Rocky anything. Rocky already knew about Tejal.

“We talked again today, and she told me…there’s someone else,” Rocky started slowly and painfully.

“I’m sorry,” Vijay said consolingly.

The noise from the fountain seemed to have drowned out any noise from the outside world. They sat a few more minutes in silence, neither one of them wanting to break the wave of loud quietness. “I’m telling you, this is getting too tough,” groaned Rocky.

“I know. And it might even get tougher still. But remember, you can’t stop.”

Rocky interrupted him. “I know all the things you’re going to say! I’ve said them to you and to a million other people going through what we are going through. But it’s just that she was so right for me! And what kills me is that I feel like she could have liked me.”

“So then why are we having this conversation?” Vijay asked, although he knew the answer to this question.

“Because I got to her a little too late. She had met a guy before she had met me. Tejal said that she hoped she didn’t lead me on, but that her parents made her call me and when she did, she enjoyed our conversations. At the time, she didn’t know where things were going with this other guy. But now she feels like she knows.”

“Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be today. But like you told me when I had met Sonia, at least now you know. There is someone out there who can make you feel that special way. Your perfect person does exist. It’s not like you’ve set up some idealistic mirage.”

“I know,” he said tiredly. “But when is it supposed to happen? I’m tired of waiting!”

Vijay said nothing. He couldn’t, because he had no answers to provide. But as they sat there, in front of the fountain, Vijay felt suddenly old himself. Here was his close friend, who for so long had helped him through this whole ordeal. His guide. And now, his guide was lost, asking him for directions. And Vijay had none to give. For he too was still equally lost.

Evening came and after an hour of cajoling in the room, Vijay persuaded Rocky to go to dinner at the convention. The thought of, for once, being the first person to meet the perfect woman before anyone else, convinced Rocky that he still had to try.

“So what’s the plan for tonight?” Vijay asked as they got off the shuttle.

“Same thing as last night. There’s dinner and then a party afterwards,” Rocky said without much emotion. Although his flesh was willing, the spirit still needed to catch up before he would be able to recover from Tejal.

“I want to meet some new people. You’ve been promising me an introduction to the California crowd, and I still don’t even know who they are,” Vijay said to Rocky. Evidently, there was a contingent of people from California that came to the convention every year but generally hung out amongst themselves. It was convention opinion that they were of the more attractive and hip crowd. Everyone wanted to be a part of the California clique, although their insular behavior made it difficult to break into the ranks.

“I can do that,” Rocky agreed.

And so they walked in. A number of people had already arrived. Like the first night, not many people had sat down at a table yet, because doing so meant committing to the decision, and nobody wanted to be stuck making a bad one.

“There’s our crowd!” Rocky said, suddenly invigorated at the sight of them, leading the way across the room with Vijay following. Standing near an empty table was a small group of men and women with their backs to everyone but the inside of the circle. They had positioned themselves near a table closest to the bar, no doubt to make the commute as short as possible.

Rocky and Vijay approached the group. They were all drinking shots of a cranberry colored drink, already loud in comparison to everyone else in the room.

“Rocky!” one of the guys called out his name loudly. “You’re finally here! Get him a drink!”

“Hey Neal! Look’s like you guys have already started without me!” Rocky said. His tone had automatically taken on that of a partyer’s. “Everyone! I want you to meet a friend of mine who’s also from California. This is Vijay. My roommate for this weekend.” Everyone in the group let out a collective “Hey, what’s going on?” and greeted him by raising their glasses and bowing their heads ever so slightly before continuing with their drinking.

Rocky quickly went to the bar and returned with two blue colored drinks in martini glasses. It was almost as if having a drink in hand and a California driver’s license constituted an admission ticket to the

group.

“Vijay, this is Malu,” Rocky started with the introductions.

“Hello Vijay,” she said, offering her hand. Vijay accepted the welcome gesture and shook her hand a hello in reply. While he had met his share of cute and nice women at the convention, Malu was nothing of the sort. She quite simply was glamorous. She wore a crushed velvet form fitting dress that Vijay could only imagine would feel wonderful to his touch. A slit in the skirt gave the slightest hint of shapely legs that were sure to exist underneath in a form courtesy of hours on a stairmaster machine.

“Hello,” Vijay said, too busy trying to control his stimulus overload to say anything more.

“It’s nice to meet you,” she looked at him with a smile, no doubt used to having such an effect on men and enjoying it. Before Vijay could speak any further, Rocky moved him forward to meet the others in the group. Rocky next introduced him to two guys, Sunil and Neal. Both were about Vijay’s height and build. Sunil had a short hair cut that was heavily gelled and looked like he had walked out of a Calvin Klein advertisement wearing a linen suit with a tightly fitting plain front pair of slacks and a crisp white shirt. Neal, on the other hand, wore an earring, had grown a goatee, and sported black slacks with a grey wool sweater.

Rocky then introduced Vijay to Ratna, but everyone called her Rats. She was slightly on the shorter side and although very attractive, one could always qualify it as a “cute in a Rosie O’Donnell way.” Next to her was Tanvi. She was funny, brash and attractive, but Vijay guessed that nobody would say in a “Rosie O’Donnell way” simply because she was even more attractive than Rats, and well, one Rosie O’Donnell was plenty. Vijay could tell that Tanvi was a partyer. He didn’t credit that assessment to his internal evaluation of character but rather more to the fact that she had encouraged and led the group in downing shots of alcohol, with those persons not finishing their shots being subjected to her loud beratement.

Finally, standing beside Tanvi was Sanjiv. Sanjiv was slightly taller than Vijay and his hair was styled in a Caesar cut. He wore jeans, a white t-shirt, a black three button jacket with black laced shoes to match. Simple clothes as a concept, but the discerning eye could tell that the t-shirt was Banana Republic, the jacket was Kenneth Cole, the jeans were Armani, and the shoes were Bruno Magli.

“Rocky,” Vijay asked when they were slightly apart from the others for talking purposes after a round of shots, “what’s the story on these people? They seem pretty cool and the girls are cute.”

“Yeah.” Rocky agreed, “But sometimes, as much as I love them, they’re a little too much.”

“What do you mean by that?” Vijay asked.

Rocky turned his back from the group so that their conversation wasn’t easily overheard. “I guess an example will help. Malu used to go out with Sanjiv when she was in school down in L.A., and then Neal from up north started going out with her when she came back to San Jose after she graduated,” Rocky explained.

“You mean the Neal right there?” Vijay discretely pointed to the Neal he was introduced to in the group.

“Yeah,” said Rocky.

“So?” Vijay said.

“Well, I guess two things. First, as far as I could tell, she hadn’t broken up with Sanjiv when she started going out with Neal, which normally, is bad enough. But what was even worse was that Neal and Sanjiv are best friends. They had grown up together and their families are close friends too. To have your best friend steal your girlfriend away typifies how they can act sometimes.”

“So I’m guessing Sanjiv and Neal are no longer best friends,” Vijay said.

“That’s the even crazier part! Malu broke up with Neal and then they all forgave each other. And if anything, something in me tells me that Sanjiv would like to get back together with Malu again, but from

the last I had heard, she’s not up for it.”

“That is kind of weird!” Vijay agreed.

“Yeah. They get drunk and then who knows what’s bound to happen. In some way or another, everyone has hooked up with each other. I’ve gotten used to it so that it doesn’t shock me too much. Most of them are up in Northern California so I’m immune from a lot of it in

L.A. But I try and keep a little distance from all that even when we’re all together.”

Volunteers were coming around instructing people sitting at their tables to wait in line for food in an orderly fashion. After being escorted to another Indian dinner the group sat down. Through some skillful maneuvering, Vijay was able to sit next to Malu. As an added bonus, Tanvi chose to sit next to Vijay on the other side. Evidently, being a new face in a crowd had its benefits.

Vijay took a sip of what was his third drink now. He could already feel the effects of the alcohol. He leaned over to Malu and before he could control himself, offered her a standard bar line, although he didn’t mean it to be. “So, come here often?”

She looked at him and said with a smile, “Actually, this is my second convention.” After saying that she went back to picking at her food.

Vijay looked at her and nodded, and took a bite of food just for the sake of taking a bite of food. He then looked up at her again after a moment and said, “I apologize.”

Malu took another sip of her drink and looked at him puzzled. Thinking she hadn’t heard him correctly, she said, “Excuse me?”

“I just wanted to say that I’m sorry,” Vijay repeated himself.

“For what?”

“For that stupid pick up line,” Vijay was getting flustered. He

shouldn’t have admitted that it was a pick-up line or that it was stupid. Damned alcohol, Vijay thought to himself crossly as he tried to collect himself. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that I feel like I totally shortchanged you with such a stupid line. Let me make it up to you.”

Malu laughed. “Don’t worry about it. I get stupid pick up lines used on me all the time!”

“Well, I didn’t mean to use it as a pick up line,” Vijay defended himself again. “More importantly, if I were trying to pick up on you, I’m hurt you’d think I would use a line as lame as that one!”

“Really?” Malu raised her left eyebrow in amusement. “I never thought Indian guys had any good lines, let alone the courage to use them. I’ve only ever gotten the standard, ‘Would you like to study together sometime?’, but not much more than that,” she laughed.

“What’re you guys talking about?” Tanvi asked, joining their conversation. Rocky, who was sitting on the other side of Tanvi downing his fifth drink also looked towards them with interest.

“Vijay is going to share some of his best pick up lines with us,” Malu laughed.

“Ooh! I want to hear one. Can you try a line on me too?” Tanvi asked eagerly, almost as if Vijay was handing out treats.

Vijay rubbed his hands together and tried to think of some. “Hmm. Give me a second,” he said closing his eyes as if that would help. It was like telling jokes. He knew a million of them, but for some reason he could never remember any when called upon to do so. “There’s always the standard ‘If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?’” he offered without much conviction as it was the first line to come to mind and he was desperate to throw something out.

Tanvi let out a remarkably valley girl-like ‘oh…my…god’ groan. Malu just smiled.

Rocky grinned broadly, the alcohol encouraging him to participate now. “Not bad! That’s good for a start. But by the way Malu is looking, I don’t think she’s sold on that one. I personally like the very simple yet elegant ‘Excuse me, are you a model?’ Or the classic, ‘So many curves, and me without any brakes!’” Rocky laughed. Malu and Tanvi again could only groan to show that they had not yet been impressed.

After a few more offerings, it was almost like Rocky and Vijay were dueling with bad pick up lines. “Okay. How about, ‘if I could rewrite the alphabet, I would put U and I together?” grinned Vijay.

“With that line, I would put P and U together!” Tanvi laughed.

“Tough crowd! Okay, I’ve got one,” Rocky was up to the challenge. He took a deep breath to try and regain his composure. He had now had quite a few drinks and appeared to be highly buzzed. He looked at Malu and asked, “Are you tired?”

“No. Why?” Malu answered, barely keeping a straight face as she leaned over onto Vijay to try and listen to what Rocky was saying, almost as if the alcohol had somehow affected her hearing.

“Because ever since I saw you, you’ve been running through my mind!”

Groans from the others were uniform again. Vijay rejoined the fray. “Okay. Here’s my sure fire, can’t lose line,” Vijay said. He took a deep breath and then looked deeply into Malu’s eyes. Vijay and Malu both were tipsy and their faces got closer. Vijay could feel her hot breath on his face. He lowered his voice and said seriously, “You know, of all the fat women in this room, you perspire the least!”

Malu, the delicate creature who looked like a bombshell, tipsy from more than a few drinks, let out a loud laugh. “No wonder you’re at the convention! With lines like that you’ll never find a woman on your own!”

“Please? You can’t tell me there weren’t a few winners in there,” Rocky complained, hurt that they weren’t impressed at any of their offerings.

“So far you’re still by yourselves guys,” Malu laughed. “Please tell me that you don’t use lines like that when you want to impress a lady.”

“I have to admit, I don’t,” Vijay admitted with a grin.

“Really?” Tanvi said. “Then you’ll have to tell us. How do you pick up on women?”

“Actually, my approach is all together different,” Vijay stopped laughing and put his napkin on the table having finished dinner. “I just compliment women. I guess, although it’s not really a pick up line, it might be considered a pick up mechanism if it fell into the wrong hands!”

“That’s it? That’s all you do?” Tanvi asked, as if this revelation by Vijay was nothing but anticlimactic. “Sounds kinda cheesy and fake to me.”

“It is unless you do it right,” Vijay agreed. “There has to be a legitimate reason for the compliment. Otherwise it’s like you said, just a cheesy pick-up line.”

“I still don’t get it,” Tanvi insisted. “Why don’t you show us. Give Malu here one of your patented compliments as an example.”

“For educational purposes only, right?” Vijay asked them for assurance.

“Yes, for educational purposes,” Malu agreed with a smile, “What would you hypothetically say to me?”

“Okay,” Vijay took the tone that a professor might in front of a class during lecture, “Making sure the compliment doesn’t go overboard and at the same time making sure it’s tasteful, I could see myself saying ‘I just wanted to tell you that there aren’t many women here that stand out, but you really do in that dress. And I just wanted to let you know that.’”

“Well, it’s definitely better than your dumb pick up lines! But it’s still a pick up line to me,” Malu complained.

“But that’s not the whole thing. There’s a crucial additional step involved,” Vijay explained.

“And that is?” Malu asked.

“I call it the walk away,” Vijay explained. “After I give you the compliment, I say good bye and walk away, maybe saying I need to meet up with someone as an excuse to leave you.”

“What?” Tanvi said, puzzled. “You don’t stick around to get the girl? What’s the whole point if you walk away?”

“Don’t you see?” Vijay asked, making it sound like the reason was as apparent as the noses on their faces.

“No, we don’t,” Malu said, equally puzzled.

“You tell me that my giving you a compliment still feels like a pick up line. So what better way to make it appear as though it’s not then by walking away?”

“But you really are trying to pick up on the woman, whether or not you want her to know it!” Tanvi interrupted. “By walking away, you leave her behind. What did that accomplish?”

Vijay grinned, “I don’t know if I should be talking anymore. I’m revealing just a bit too much about my modus operandi already.”

“No! You can’t stop now!” Tanvi said shaking him.

Malu looked at Vijay and then looked at Tanvi. A look of understanding could be seen on her face as she started to laugh. “Tanvi, the reason Vijay isn’t saying anything is because he feels that he hasn’t lost anything by walking away. If anything, he feels like he’s just locked me up for a later conversation. A conversation started by me so I don’t feel like he ever used a pick up line!”

Vijay raised his hand in protest and laughed, “I have to tell you. It works on you women all the time!”

Before Malu could even form a drunken retort, Sanjiv came from behind and pulled at one of her arms.

“Malu! I need to talk to you,” he said sharply, evidently feeling like she was enjoying herself more than what the rules permitted. Vijay looked up at Sanjiv, who consciously, it seemed to Vijay, made no effort to make eye contact with him. Vijay could tell that Sanjiv had a look that indicated he had seen enough. His face was full of jealousy.

“I’ll be with you in a second,” Malu pouted to Sanjiv, holding onto Vijay’s arm, but at the same time, kissing the hand Sanjiv had put on her.

“No! Now!” he said angrily. He pulled her up abruptly.

“I’ll talk to you later,” said Malu to Vijay with a drunken wink of mischief as she was pulled away from the table to have a heated conversation with Sanjiv.

Vijay was in shock at first. He then hesitated. Should he get up and follow? If anything, to make sure she was all right? Tanvi sensing the questions being played out in his mind said, “Let them go. Sanjiv just gets jealous now and then. You’ll just be the latest guy he’ll look at with daggers now,” she smirked.

“Why? They’re not going out or anything are they?” Vijay asked her.

“They are,” she said. “They’re one of those on again off again types though. You know how with some couples it depends on which month it is whether they’re going out or not. With them, it depends on the hour. But that’s just because Sanjiv is ridiculously jealous. See. There they are, all lovey-dovey again,” she pointed to them across the room.

Vijay just looked at Tanvi. He then looked at Malu and Sanjiv who were across the way. And then he felt sorry, not for Malu, but for Sanjiv. To have someone you care so much about act the way Vijay could sense she did with him and others, would make anyone, not just Sanjiv, crazy with jealousy.

“I need another drink,” said Tanvi. “I’m going to get one, you wanna come?” she lurched his direction, no doubt feeling the full effects of the alcohol she had already taken in.

Vijay looked at her, and shook his head no, having sobered up from the goings on of the California crowd. She rose to leave and Vijay just looked around the table and began to see why Rocky had described them as a little strange and too much to handle. He moved over two seats to sit next to Rocky who had during this time become very quiet. Vijay could tell that Rocky was on the downswing from all the alcohol he had taken in quick and early. Vijay also knew that just as the alcohol, if but for a brief moment, made Rocky seem happy and over with his plight, would now only intensify the hurt and depression unless Vijay distracted him.

“Rocky, this California crowd’s kinda crazy and messed up. Let’s move on and meet some normal women.” Vijay pulled him up and they started to walk around. By then, dinner had already concluded and the others were starting to leave the room. Although Vijay hoped that they would have the chance to walk around out in the hallway, he began to realize that Rocky was drunk and in no shape for that, let alone to either go to the party to dance or talk to people. So Vijay, with a wistful sigh, maneuvered Rocky to a couch and planted himself next to him, relegated to surveying the scene around him. He hoped that Rocky would sober up, but he wasn’t holding his breath.

As they were sitting there Vijay saw Megha walking around with Komal in tow. She looked across the room and caught sight of Vijay and Rocky and came to them.

“Hey! We missed you guys at dinner,” Megha said. “What’s been going on?” Komal was in the background shaky and looking angry.

“Oh, I hung out with some people from California for a while with Rocky. And well, Rocky kinda got drunk…”

“I’m not drunk!” Rocky slurred slowly, “I’m just very sad. Poor me!”

“…and so, I’m taking care of him right now,” finished Vijay.

“I don’t need any taking care of,” moped Rocky. “I’m used to being alone,” he said full of self-pity. “Go. Have fun. I’ll be okay on my own.”

Komal, who up to now was concentrating on just staying upright, exploded “Why don’t you just shut the hell up!”

“Let me guess,” Vijay said with a smile, “Komal had a little too much to drink too, huh?”

“Oh yes she did,” Megha said. “You’ve missed a lot of fun. She’s been getting a little fed up with this whole thing and has been hiding it behind a polite southern smile. Turns out Milan found someone, which although is great news for the family, it just got Komal a little down knowing all the new pressure she’ll get now. What, with a younger male relative finding someone before her. And when she’s drunk, it all comes out in the most obnoxious way.”

“Even more obnoxious than normal? Save us!” Vijay joked.

“You…are…an…idiot!” Komal spit out slowly and venomously pointing at Rocky although talking to Vijay. She swayed uncertainly like a ship in rough waters.

“Komal, before you get me sea sick, why don’t you sit down. Move over Rocky,” Vijay motioned to him to make room on the couch for Komal.

“Rocky! So this is the famous Rock Shit who ditched us at our table because he was so scared to be with five amazing women? Another male idiot!” she said loudly with a snicker to no one in particular while nearly collapsing onto the couch.

Rocky looked up at Komal as she sat next to him, put his hand to his forehead in drunken fashion wondering what bad things he had done in the past to deserve such treatment, and repeated once again, “Poor me!”

“Well, at least Komal’s obnoxiousness is better than Rocky. He just gets depressed,” Vijay said to Megha.

While Vijay and Megha continued to talk, Komal focused on Rocky. Soon a conversation of comical quality took place between the two of them as they explained how life had given each of them a raw deal.

Vijay and Megha just looked at each other and laughed. They joined Komal and Rocky on the couch, who were providing quite a bit of entertainment now. “I guess we’re stuck being the caretakers tonight,” Megha sighed.

“What a weekend this is turning out to be,” Vijay said to her over the drunken commotion that Rocky and Komal were making.

“You’re know what your problem is and why you haven’t found a guy? You’re just plain mean!” Rocky said to Komal after she had unleashed a verbal barrage against men in general, although it appeared to all directed at Rocky.

“Well…you know what you’re problem is?” Komal fired back unsteadily but angrily. “You’re a man which makes you an idiot!”

With those parting blows, both Rocky and Komal passed out. And all Vijay could think was how the Marriage Thermometer didn’t stand a chance of moving up with the likes of them at the convention.

18

The Meet Market—Day Three—Now It’s Just You and Me

Vijay awoke without the aid of any phone call from his parents. He looked at the clock on the table. It read 6:00 a.m. and it was still dark outside. He groaned and wondered to himself why he was so painfully awake so early. He lay in bed for a while, hoping sleep would come back to him, but his mind kept buzzing with random thoughts and questions and he for some reason couldn’t shut it off or feed it enough answers to go back peacefully to sleep.

He rose out of bed, put on some shorts, a t-shirt, and his baseball cap and quietly walked out of the room. Vijay felt the need to go outside and to think. This was the last day of the convention and he was nowhere closer to his end goal than when he had first come to the convention. Not that there was any real expectation that something would happen. But at the same time, Vijay wondered if he really was giving it all the effort necessary.

He walked through the hotel lobby and out the back doors through the swimming pool area. The hotel was adjacent to the beach. As he walked out to greet the ocean and the sunrise soon to arrive, he could see the silhouette of another person in a pony tail and blue sweats staring out across the horizon. It was Mona.

Vijay walked up beside her and said, “Good morning.”

She looked at him for a second, surprised to see him, but then smiled, fixing her gaze back intently at the horizon, answering “Good morning to you too. You’re up early.”

“I know. I didn’t really get to party too much last night. Besides, this is all a first for me,” Vijay said, joining Mona in intently looking at the horizon. “Back at home, I watch sunsets where the sun dissolves slowly into the ocean. But a sunrise? Never seen the sun come out of the ocean.”

“Most people don’t take the time to do it,” she said. “but it amazes me every time how quickly the sun rises, and before you know it, it’s completely up in the sky for the rest of the day,” said Mona. She then added philosophically, “It makes me realize how fast time is racing by.”

They both watched the sunrise silently for a few minutes until it cleared the horizon. Mona then looked at Vijay and asked, “Would you like to go for a walk?” He agreed and they started walking north along the shore. Mona kept looking at him and smiling. “I’m glad we got to meet up again. It’s almost like fate. I’m actually leaving later this morning to go to a wedding and wouldn’t have gotten to see you otherwise.”

“I’ve been looking for you, but never see you at any of the convention events.” The sun was now fully in the sky. The hotel stood out on the horizon like a small box behind them shimmering in the morning light.

“To be honest with you, I haven’t really been giving this convention much of a chance. I came because a friend of mine is getting married this weekend in a nearby hotel, which was a good enough excuse for me to come to the convention, even if it was for little parts of the time while I wasn’t going to wedding events. I felt that if I was in some way a part of the convention, my parents would think that I’m at least trying. The truth is though, the whole marriage thing is not something that I want to do right now,” Mona said, picking up a shell on the path in front of them. She threw it out into the ocean that had approached them like a cautious wild animal in the form of a wave hoping to be

fed.

“You’re not interested in meeting someone?” Vijay asked.

“Part of it is, right now in my life, I’ve just finally started doing what I really want to do for the first time ever. I’m going back to school. I’m about to start an exciting and new career. I’m finally taking care of myself. I’m not ready right to get involved in a relationship. Right now I need to focus on ‘me’,” Mona explained.

“I’ve come to learn that relationships are just a matter of timing. You probably just haven’t hit that time yet to go from a ‘me’ to an ‘us’,” Vijay rationalized for her.

After a moment of silence, Mona said, “You’re wrong there. I was ready for a relationship before,” she said as they continued to walk up the beach. After some more contemplative silence, Mona said, “I don’t know if you know, but well, I was seeing someone before. In fact, it was serious.”

“Really?” Vijay asked, not saying anything more. He knew everything but was interested to hear the story from her. They walked some more as he waited for Mona to talk when she was ready.

“Can you believe I was this close,” Mona held two fingers together having mentally committed to tell the story, “to making the biggest mistake in my life? I almost got married to the wrong guy.”

After a moment of silence, Vijay proactively asked over the roar of the surf, “So…what happened?”

“Well,” Mona started, “It was a parent set-up. The typical Indian thing.”

“Were you attracted to him?”

She shrugged her shoulders, “I was young back then. I was barely twenty-two when we were introduced to each other. He was older. Twenty-seven. It was all new to me, this whole marriage idea. At the time, for some reason or another, I had come to accept that as my fate. I didn’t question it. I just followed directions.” Mona stopped walking and looked out to the ocean. “You know though, I can admit it. At the time, I did like him. He was finishing med school and he was good looking. He was what a lot of women are looking to find.”

“Do you feel like now that you’re older, you know better, that you’re looking for something different?” Vijay asked, wondering why the decision to not get married had been a good one for her.

She thought about the question silently for a moment, stealing a glance at the ocean. “I think so. It’s a little scary sometimes though, because you sit and wonder whether what you’re looking for has changed because you know better now, or because you’re just settling,” she said. “But for me, I know better now, especially after what I went through with him!”

“Sounds like he must have really been the wrong guy,” Vijay said.

“He was and he wasn’t. When I met him, I liked him. But whether I loved him, I honestly couldn’t tell you. But love is confusing, and when you try to tell your parents that, they tell you it’s natural to have doubts and that it all works out once you get married. That’s where I was headed until a week before the wedding,” Mona said.

“What? It got broken off that late? After the invites were out and everything?” Vijay asked incredulously, although he remembered the story Rocky had told him years ago.

“Let me tell you,” Mona said with a sad laugh, “Our relatives had already flown in from out of the country for this wedding, it was that late.”

“So, who broke it off?” Vijay asked.

“I did,” Mona said quietly. “It turned out that he was already in love with someone else.”

Surprised, Vijay stopped and looked at her. This was a part of the story he hadn’t heard before. “And you found out a week before the wedding?” he paused once more. “You really lucked out.”

“Thanks,” Mona said sincerely. “Most of the times when I tell people what happened, they say they’re sorry. But I feel like you. I was lucky not to end up with him.”

“But wait a second!” Vijay said. “How did you ever find out he was in love with someone else? Especially a week before the wedding!”

Mona closed her eyes as she brought back the memories of that fateful day. “I remember I had gotten this letter from a Sangita Kapadia just a week before the wedding,” Mona said. “She wrote that she should be marrying Jayesh, not me. That he really loved her, and had even bought her an engagement ring and proposed to her before his parents said that they didn’t like her. He gave me Sangita’s ring when he proposed to me, if you can believe that!”

“That’s incredible!” Vijay exclaimed. “What did Jayesh have to say about all of this?” Vijay asked.

“I confronted him and he told me that she was the girl he was going out with just before he was introduced to me. He admitted it was serious. That he cared for her. Loved her. Loved he said. No more though, he assured me. Then he said that he knew with time he would learn to love me as much as he loved her.”

“He said he could learn to love you!?” Vijay asked.

“Can you believe it!” She opened her eyes and looked at him. “I sat there on the bench, and then the whole absurdity of it all just struck me. I realized that love shouldn’t be something that has to be learned or taught. It may be difficult to find, but it’s also the easiest thing when it’s right. But even still, for a moment, I was thinking, the wedding still could go on. It had to,” said Mona, having stopped and just staring out at the waves, transfixed at their mixture of sun sparkle, foam, and churned up green blue water.

The power of the moment, the day, their proximity, was all too intoxicating. It was almost as if the conversation had to come out, and they were both just vehicles for the story.

“I left Jayesh, not sure what to do, and went home. I remember that day so vividly. My mom, who like any mom, was the most excited about the wedding. She was definitely one of the most important reasons why I kept thinking I could make this still work. Otherwise, what would people think?” Mona sniffled a little, the emotions of that long

past day started to flood back.

“And then?” Vijay asked almost unconsciously.

“I remember that I was in my room crying as softly as I could, and I guess she had heard me. She always tells me that there are certain things, no matter how quiet, a mother is trained to hear,” she said with a laugh and another sniffle. “She asked me what was wrong and at first I didn’t want to say anything, but it eventually came out. And Vijay, at that moment, I truly realized how much my parents loved me even though they never say it out loud every day. I thought she would have been practical and sensible, the whole business of “it’s too late now, you make the best of the situation” mentality. But can I tell you, when I told my mom what had happened, it was as if there was no debate even necessary. She made the decision that I felt like I knew I wanted to make, but never thought I would have the courage to do. She just stood up, looked at me, reached over me in bed, stroking my hair, and simply said, ‘of course you aren’t going to marry him.’“

They had arrived back at the hotel and sat on two chairs by the pool. “That’s quite a story,” Vijay said. Two hotel employees were bustling around them setting up lounge chairs in preparation for the day they had already started close to an hour ago.

“Well, it really is amazing how that one event has so shaped my life. After all of that, I just decided that I needed to take care of myself, and it’s at that moment that I truly felt like my life had begun. The next fall I enrolled in fashion school, quit my job, and eventually moved to New York City away from family and friends. I started a whole new life, and it’s been so amazing. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been! So finding someone is not really something I want to do right now, even though my parents keep insisting that I’ve got to get back on that horse again,” she paused for a moment to collect herself. “I just don’t want to miss out on any of the great new things happening to me right now so I’m just kinda doing the minimum to keep them happy, like going to this convention,” she paused for a moment to look at the horizon again, almost as if all these great things that would come in her life would be like the sun, emerging from the ocean. “But what about you? How’s your timing?”

“My timing’s good, but I don’t seem to see anyone that’s interesting, let alone interested,” Vijay replied.

“Oh come on! I’ve seen you and all those women tagging along. You might have all you desire right next to you and not even realize it,” Mona said.

Vijay sat there for a moment and thought back over the weekend so far. He then admitted, although not quite sure why, “You may be right.” Not ready to pursue that thought any further, he changed the subject again, “So do you know if Jayesh and Sangita ever end up getting married?”

“I don’t know. The only other contact I ever had was writing a letter back to Sangita thanking her for saving me from making the biggest mistake in my life,” she then laughed to herself as she recollected a memory. “You know, I even sent her the ring. I figured, it really was meant for her. She should have it!”

“That sounds like a fitting end to that story!” Vijay said with a smile.

Mona smiled back, sighed, and then said, “I haven’t told anyone my story out loud in a really long time. It always feels good when I do, kinda forces me to realize how lucky I am. Thanks for listening,” she said with a sincere smile.

“What are friends for,” he replied. She hugged him and said good bye. As she walked away, Vijay continued to stare at her, not quite sure what he thought of her.

After leaving Mona, Vijay quickly raced to the hotel to meet his parents and have breakfast. It was close to nine in the morning and he had promised to give them the daily status report. He thought it amusing that his parents made the big trip to come over, but he only really ever saw them for breakfasts. He hadn’t met them the night before as they had left to visit relatives who lived nearby. Vijay entered the room with his shorts and his baseball hat on. He located his parents and walked over towards them.

“Vijay,” his father shook his head unhappily looking at him. “How do you suppose anyone is going to want to meet you when you come in the room looking like this? People will think that you don’t even know how to take a shower!”

His mother ignored his appearance, perhaps thinking it was a lost cause by now, and told him to sit down offering him some breakfast and chai that they had brought to the table.

“So. Any progress?” His father asked the standard question no sooner than after Vijay had taken his first bite out of a doughnut. “There are a lot of girls here. Have you found anyone you like?”

“I’m looking. Believe me, I’m looking. Even though there are a lot of girls here, when you break it down, it’s a lot fewer than you’d think.”

“What do you mean?” his father asked.

“A lot of them are too young, still in school. Then many of the ones that are older don’t have a good job or education,” Vijay pushed his father’s buttons.

“Well, try to meet as many girls as you can. That’s all you can do,” he said resignedly, not having anything to counter the very same principles he had counseled Vijay on numerous times before. “You never know. There may be some new people today, so keep your eyes open,” his father counseled.

Vijay’s mother countered with existing inventory by hinting, “Or better yet, you know that we are still liking Megha.” Evidently, they had run into Megha earlier and continued to be high on her.

“I know,” Vijay said. He recalled again how well her visit had been to their house when she had come to see him in California. “But let’s keep looking, okay? How was the visit with the relatives?”

“Oh you know them. They all told us that they have been saving their vacations so that they can go to your wedding when the time comes. They were just wondering how many years they were going to have to wait before they could take time off,” his father laughed.

“Boy, now I have every relative’s vacation plans on my shoulders too! What pressure!” Vijay groaned.

“Just think though,” his mother said, “when it happens, what bottled up fun we will be releasing!”

“I can’t wait,” Vijay said, as he left. He really couldn’t.

Vijay went back to the room after breakfast. Rocky had already awoken and was now resting on a lounge chair on their balcony with his eyes closed, listening to the ocean.

“Hey. How’re you feeling?” Vijay joined him, sitting on another chair.

“I’m fine. Thanks to you, the aspirin, the water, and a visit to the porcelain god on my knees early this morning,” Rocky said.

“That reminds me. If I ever want to meet any women at a party, you are so not on my list of people to be with!” Vijay said, grinning.

“I know. All the honeys take one look at me, and don’t even bother looking at my friends,” Rocky said with a smile, keeping his eyes closed while he soaked in the sun.

“No, I don’t think that’s why I wouldn’t want you around,” Vijay laughed. “I think it’s more that you can’t hold your liquor and then become an embarrassing spectacle!”

“Was I that bad?” Rocky looked at Vijay apologetically, opening his eyes. “I don’t remember much from yesterday, and for more reasons than one, I think that’s a good thing for me right now.”

Vijay looked at him and asked quietly, “So, are you feeling a little better?”

“Yeah, I think so. I don’t know why,” Rocky said.

“Maybe it’s because Megha and her friend Komal kept you entertained and out of trouble most of the evening.”

“I know. Actually, they were pretty nice to me. So that was Megha, huh? You guys look good together,” Rocky said.

“Please! We only looked good because we were taking care of you and Komal all evening!” Vijay laughed. “But hey! What about you and Komal? You guys looked like a pretty compatible drunk couple!”

“Stop it!” laughed Rocky, but then he followed it with an even more drawn out “Get outta here!”

Vijay’s ears perked. The last sentence struck a chord in him. To verify, Vijay decided to bait the hook. “Yeah, Megha even told me that Komal thought you were kinda cute.”

“Really?” Rocky turned around quickly with unmasked interest.

Bingo, thought Vijay. “No, I was just joking! But I’ll definitely have to let Megha know about how you have the hots for Komal!”

“Fine,” Rocky said lamely, realizing he may have played his hand to openly, “Go ahead. I don’t care. Besides, Komal is probably engaged or something anyways, knowing my luck.”

“Actually, she’s still on the market,” Vijay said. “It’s just a shame that you aren’t even interested.”

Rocky seemed torn as to how to respond, not comfortable revealing his true feelings, partly because he didn’t want to and partly because his feelings were based on a drunken haze. “I didn’t say that! Geez, I don’t know what to say!” Rocky was flustered having fallen into Vijay’s trap. I met her when I was so sloshed, for all I know, the person I’m thinking about may not even be her! Do you think we can hang out with them today?”

“Sorry,” Vijay said, as he headed to the bathroom to take a shower. “I really don’t see any point to it.”

“Why?” Rocky asked. “Do you think now that I’m sober I won’t like her?”

“No! I’m thinking now that she’s sober, she’s not going to like you!” Vijay laughed and went back into the room. As he stepped into the shower, he thought to himself how funny it was that one night’s misery could lead to the next day’s hope.

Close to noon, Vijay found himself sitting on the aisle seat of the shuttle with Rocky beside him as they headed back to the convention center for what seemed like the hundredth time. There had been no events planned for that morning and they were going just for lunch. He looked at the other passengers. Two straight nights of partying and late night carousing had begun to show its effects. Those with hangovers either had their eyes shut or sunglasses on to cover the strain of being upright and awake. Those certain few who appeared to have shown no signs of wear were sitting next to their parents, obviously either not permitted to engage in the night time activities that the others had participated in or simply not interested in doing so.

“This convention sure is a marathon of partying, isn’t it?” Vijay groaned tiredly.

“Remember? I told you it would be like this,” Rocky said.

“I know. But even still. I feel like it gets old after a while. Everyone just walking around trying to work up the nerve to meet people,” Vijay said with a sigh.

“Yeah. But this is the last day,” Rocky said with emphasis.

“So? Does that really change anything?”

“Definitely. It the Midnight Scramble. Up to now, everyone has been busy checking each other out. But come tonight, as things are starting to wind down, people will start to scramble to meet people, knowing that the time they could be together may almost be over,” Rocky said.

“It sounds like a massive ‘let me just settle’ fest,” Vijay said. “Everyone basically figures they can’t get who they want, so they meet the next available person.”

“It’s not that bad. You have to realize, most of these people are playing games and all that stuff because in reality they’re just too nervous to make their moves. Nothing like the last night of a convention to work up your courage and make the first contact with that woman or guy you’ve had your eye on the whole time,” Rocky explained. They had arrived and got off the bus. Perhaps, Vijay thought, this last day could still prove fruitful despite the fact that the other days up to now had not.

They entered into the Hoover Room and waited in line again for more food. Today the fare involved pizza from a local Italian restaurant. Evidently, the organizers realized that the younger generation was not as open to Indian food for every meal as were the parents. No sooner had they put a couple of slices of pizza on their plates that Rocky had spotted Komal and Megha sitting at a table in the far corner of the room. Evidently, there would be no discussion as to whether they would join them or not because Rocky had already started to make his way towards them. It was somewhat comical for Vijay. Armed with the fact that he knew of Rocky’s interest, he could tell Rocky was making a beeline to their table. However, to the unsuspecting, including Komal and Megha, he looked to be searching for a table and phantom friends and was pleasantly surprised to have run into them instead.

“Can we join you ladies for lunch?” Rocky asked before Vijay could even catch up.

“Of course you can,” Megha replied with a smile which, to Vijay, suggested that Rocky and Vijay had been a subject of discussion between them before they had even arrived. “After all,” she said, “this is the last lunch.”

After eating for a while, Vijay said, “I was just thinking. Tomorrow I’ll get to see the outside world again. It seems like I’ve been trapped in some isolated bubble with the same people.”

“Well, the bubble,” Megha said with a laugh, “is actually pretty big when you think about it. Look at all the people who are here, and this is just the people our age.”

“That’s what my parents keep saying. But even though it might seem like a lot of people on paper, after meeting them, it sure feels like a lot less,” Vijay answered.

“You said it!” Rocky agreed, pulling out sheets of paper from his pocket.

“What’s that?” Megha asked him.

“This is the list of attendees they gave to us with our badges when we first arrived. Let’s see if we know most of the people listed now after having been here for four days at the convention,” Rocky said, straightening out the sheets.

“I can’t believe you’ve been carrying that with you! You’ve been checking out badges all weekend haven’t you?” Vijay chided him.

“No comment,” Rocky said, with a grin.

“But that’s no good!” Megha said, “This only lists the women!”

“Not to worry,” Komal said, taking out the pages listing the male attendees at the convention from her purse.

“You too!” Megha laughed.

Rocky looked to Komal, “These amateurs just don’t understand like us veterans, do they?”

“Obviously not!” Komal said with a smile back at him.

Rocky spoke to Vijay, “Maybe someday, when you’re older and wiser and hopefully better looking, you’ll understand, that in order for love to work you need to be focused. You need to take things seriously. You need to plan.”

“Okay, enough! You sound just like my parents!” Vijay groaned. “I just find it ironic that on the first day my parents were telling me to carry the list around and to check people off as I met them and I thought it was so ridiculous, and here I find you and Komal have been

doing the same thing this whole convention.”

“Like I said, I’m taking things seriously,” said Rocky.

“I totally agree,” Komal said. “But looking at my sheets, I think I’ve done all that I can.”

“That can’t be right!” Vijay exclaimed. “Let me see. I’ll find you your man in these pages right now.”

Komal surrendered her sheets to him accepting his challenge. “Okay,” Vijay said, turning past the front page. “First thing. Rocky, you could learn from her. She even has a rating system down next to some of the names.”

Komal started suddenly, not realizing she had done that. “I wonder if I did that last night while I was drunk because I sure don’t remember rating anybody on the sheets! Hey! Give me that back!” She made an attempt to pull them back, concerned that other embarrassing information might be on the pages. Vijay, however, was too quick.

“Sorry, I’ll give these back to you when I’m done,” Vijay said laughing. “Komal, I’m going to help you find your guy, remember?” Vijay persisted. “Now let’s see. How to begin? I assume you’re looking for someone at least your age or a few years older, right?”

“Yes!” She agreed with a sigh, realizing that she wasn’t getting back the sheets anytime soon until the exercise was over.

“Okay, so nobody under the age of thirty-five…” Vijay grinned. Megha punched him in the arm on Komal’s behalf for accelerating her age by five years.

“That’s right!” she said.

“Wow! Going through this, the age criteria of yours alone cuts out most of the guys listed in here. But there’s still some available ones. Okay, next category, no relatives, right?”

“Of course,” she grinned.

“All right, let me take Milan off the list,” Vijay laughed. “How about minimum height?”

Komal responded, “I’m 5’7” which makes me taller than the average Indian man let alone woman. So factoring in high heels, let’s say the guy has to be at least 5’11”.”

“Okay, that sounds reasonable, but again severely cutting down the list,” Vijay said nodding his head as he ran his pen through a number of names crossing out guys too short for Komal as if he were an accountant fixing numbers in a ledger.

“Okay, what village can they be from?” Vijay asked.

“Caste no bar,” Komal said in an auntie accent, laughing.

“Good. What about education or career criteria?” Vijay asked.

“My only criteria is that he be employed,” said Komal.

“Yeah. She’s not holding out for a doctor,” Megha replied with a playful grin. “Those days are probably gone!”

“Good!” Vijay said. “That makes it easier.”

“Back to age, I assume you don’t want anyone, say, more than five years older than you, do you?” Vijay asked.

“No, ideally I wouldn’t,” she agreed. Vijay crossed out names.

“Nobody that’s been divorced, right?”

“No,” she said. Vijay crossed out more names.

“All right. I’ve narrowed the list down. Are you ready?” he spoke to her but the whole table was interested in Vijay’s results.

“I’m tingling with anticipation,” Komal joked.

“Okay, in no particular order,” Vijay started from the first page. “Amit?”

“Too big,” Komal replied.

“Too fat,” Vijay said out loud, crossing out his name.

“I didn’t say that!” Komal yelped.

“Please!” Megha said. “Stop trying to be polite! I heard the jokes you were making about what it would be like to have him on top of you!”

“Okay, next name, Bhavin?” Vijay went down the list.

“Too skinny.”

“Weakling,” Vijay said out loud while crossing his name off.

“The guy had a waist thinner than mine! On top of that, he had a belt on that was too big so he had poked extra holes in it! It practically looped around him twice!” Komal defended her answer.

“Okay then! Remember, you don’t have to defend every answer!” Vijay said, crossing out his name. “Baptu?”

“He has a kid,” Komal replied.

“But wait, are you sure? It doesn’t say he’s been married before,” Vijay said looking at the sheet.

“I know. He hasn’t been married before,” confirmed Komal.

“Ooh, interesting,” the rest of the table responded in unison.

“Chet? It says here he’s a doctor!” Vijay said.

“First, he’s a chiropractor not a doctor. Second, he’s a jerk shopping for a trophy.”

“Well, we know you’re no trophy so let’s move on,” Vijay laughed. Megha hit him on behalf of Komal again. “What about Dev?”

“Ugly,” Komal replied.

“Now come on!” Vijay protested. “You have to imagine potential as well.”

“No,” Megha spoke this time, “I met him with Komal. Take our word for it. He’s ugly with no potential.”

Vijay said, “Okay, next, Atul.”

Komal said, “He was really cute.”

“He’s a hunk,” Megha agreed.

“Well? What’s the problem?” Rocky asked.

“I know, he’s got three stars, and then they’re crossed out. Why’s that?” Vijay asked.

“My luck being what it is, it turns out that he just got engaged,” Komal said.

“Been there, done that,” Vijay said, recalling Atul was the one going out with Sonal from his table the first night.

“Me too,” Rocky commiserated, no doubt thinking of Tejal.

“Okay,” Vijay flipped the page, “Hitesh? You have no marks next to his name. You need to meet him.”

“Actually, from what I’ve heard, he’s not at the convention. Believe me, he looked good on paper. I tried.”

“Bijal?”

“Bijal is a girl, not a guy. There was a mistake in listing her on the men’s side. Needless to say, she didn’t meet a lot of guys from the sheets.”

“Kanu?”

“Bald.”

“Karan from Detroit?”

“Balding.”

“Karan from New York?”

“JOJ and wants to go back to India in two years.”

“Shilpam?”

“Really bad skin.”

“Mani?”

“Slimey.”

“How so?” Rocky asked.

“It was all in his approach. He came up to me and asked me if I could be his garaam garaam masala girl,” Komal replied. “I told him I was not going to be any kind of spice girl for him!” Komal said with attitude.

“Fine. How about Manish?”

“Tree stump.”

“What?” Rocky interrupted again.

“I met him at the human bingo and talked to him for a while. He’s very boring and had nothing to say. He just seemed like, you know, a tree stump.”

“You never know though!” Megha broke in. “He might just have been nervous or something. Maybe once you got to know him, you would see a side of him that shows he’s got a sweet personality.”

“Okay, I amend my tree stump comment and will use the ugly exception.”

“You’re impossible!” Vijay said, shaking his head. “No wonder you’re single! What’s wrong with Naishad?”

“Dress pants, tennis shoes.”

“Parth?”

“Dress shoes, white tube socks.”

“Vikram?”

“Tattoo. Big and ugly.”

“The tattoo or him?” Megha asked.

“Both,” Komal replied.

“Okay then,” Vijay flipped through all the pages.

“I told you. There’s nobody here for me,” Komal sighed.

“Wait a minute!” Vijay said going through the list. “Wow! I think I found your man!” he said excitedly.

“Yeah, sure,” Komal said, doubtfully.

“No really. He’s six feet tall,” Vijay read off the sheet.

“Awesome,” Komal said.

“Engineer.”

“Great.”

“Thirty.”

“Perfect.”

“Single.”

“So far so good. In fact, he sounds too perfect. Why don’t I like him?” she laughed at Megha, to see if she knew the answer.

“No in fact, you’ve got four stars next to his name,” Vijay said holding the sheet so only he could read it.

“I put four stars down?” Komal said, scrunching her eyebrows, trying to figure out who she had done that for. “I must have done that while I was drunk last night.”

“Yeah, it looks like that. These are some pretty shaky stars,” Vijay said.

“So I’m curious,” Megha said. “Who is the dream guy for our Komal.”

“Let’s see. His name is…Rakshit Patel!” Rocky and Komal both blushed and turned away from each other. Megha just smiled discretely, happy that Vijay somehow had brought the idea to the forefront so that there wouldn’t have to be a whole lot of feeling around on the subject. Vijay too smiled. If anyone was going to be serious about helping to find love today, it was going to be him…even if it wasn’t for himself but instead for his friends.

After lunch Rocky and Vijay visited the hotel gym. Vijay, in addition to wanting to get some exercise, was curious to know if there would be any women working out. So many women in their bio-data said they enjoyed exercising, but Vijay had come to learn so few actually meant it.

Rocky, although still recovering from the hangover, agreed to accompany him. Vijay appreciated the company, but he knew Rocky was really coming to talk.

As they were stretching, Rocky opened with a, “I’ll admit. I’ve had fun hanging out with Komal and she seems great. But how could you have pulled that stunt earlier today at lunch!”

“Oh just relax! Don’t tell me that rush to go sit next to Megha and Komal wasn’t so that you could get close to Komal. You like her and it’s just painful to watch how hard you’re trying to hide that!”

“No. I just think I might like her. There’s a big difference!” Rocky said after finishing his set. “I don’t even know if she likes me or anything.”

“Look,” Vijay said while lying on the bench and talking to Rocky while he was spotting him. “Its fairly obvious that there is interest on her end.”

“You don’t know that!” Rocky said.

Vijay finished his set and then said, “What the heck is the matter with you? Why don’t you think she would like you? All the signs are there. You got four stars, remember?”

Rocky insisted stubbornly over Vijay’s interruption, “Those four stars were when she was drunk. I have no idea what she is thinking, despite what you say.”

Vijay softened his tone, realizing that Rocky probably did not want to get started into thinking along the route Vijay was taking him because of Tejal and all that had happened the day before. “Okay, I have an idea.”

“What?” Rocky said between a rep on his set. He too was laboring, having added forty-five pound plates on both sides.

“I can just ask Megha what Komal thinks about you,” Vijay said.

“I don’t know,” Rocky said with some hesitation. He then thought about it for a minute while completing his set and perhaps realizing the limited time left said, “Okay, but whatever you do,” Rocky laid down on the bench, “don’t tell Megha I like Komal or anything. Just ask her what Komal thinks of me. Or maybe you could just kinda casually mention, ‘hey, you know, those two look good together. I wonder if anything could ever come out of that…’” Rocky said trailing off, “You know what I mean.” Rocky began his set.

“What do I look like to you? Your seventh grade classmate?” But then he didn’t say anything more than that. Vijay knew how much it meant to Rocky.

They had taken a half-hour nap to recharge before the big night and were getting ready now. After putting their jackets on, Rocky went down the routine. “Breath good? B.O. okay? Zippers up? All right, do you have your badge? Let’s hurry! I want to go now.”

“Why? What’s the rush? Dinner doesn’t start for at least an hour from now.” Vijay asked.

“I know, but this is the last night. There’s nothing like a final night to get people out and willing to talk to and meet you. Besides, all the women will be decked out. You’ll swear that there were not nearly as many cute girls earlier in the convention as there will be tonight, just because Indian women clean up even better than us Indian guys. So let’s go!”

“Okay,” Vijay agreed, putting his badge on and locking up the door as they walked out, wondering what the evening would hold for them.

“Wow, forty-five minutes early and there are a lot of people here already!” Vijay said once they had arrived.

“I told you,” Rocky said.

“And I’m planning to meet every woman I’m interested in tonight,” Vijay set himself a goal for the evening.

Rocky rolled his eyes. “You sure talk a big game,” he said joking.

“Hey. I might talk more than I do, but I do more than most talk,” Vijay said profoundly, however, the words were lost on Rocky because no sooner had they turned around that they saw Megha and Komal walk through the doors.

“They’re here! Let’s go talk to them!” Rocky insisted excitedly. Gone was all pretense of trying to act calm, cool, and collected in front of Vijay. He then followed it with a “Please. Come on.”

“That’s all I wanted to hear,” Vijay said with a grin. “Throw in a ‘I’ll owe you one’ and I’m on my way with you to do some information gathering.”

“I’ll owe you. Big-time,” promised Rocky. He then pushed Vijay towards them. They too, had evidently been looking for them specifically. Vijay could tell although Komal and Megha were trying very hard not to look in their direction.

As Vijay walked towards them with Rocky, he was surprised at how right Rocky was about the women in the room. It was if a transformation had taken place. The women looked so grown up. So incredibly attractive. This was certainly true about Megha and Komal. They had both put their hair up showing off beautiful gold earrings and matching necklaces. Komal was wearing a rose colored lengha and Megha was wearing a forest green lengha, each with interlaid gold and mirror work.

“Hi Komal,” Rocky said clumsily, his eyes locked on her as they approached them.

“Hey Rocky,” Komal said shyly, looking at Rocky. Vijay and Megha just looked at each other indicating with grins how amusing they thought the two of them were acting.

“Okay, how about some drinks?” Vijay broke up the trance that seemed to have come over Komal and Rocky. “What can I get you Komal?” Vijay asked politely.

“Red wine would be great,” she responded.

“Me, too,” Rocky said, implying he would not be going with Vijay to get the drinks.

“And you?” Vijay asked Megha with a grin.

“An Indian girl? Drink? Not me! But I could go with you and help you to bring them back though,” she laughed.

“That’s just what I was hoping!” Vijay said with a smile.

As Megha and Vijay walked towards the bar, Megha started laughing when her back was towards them, “Ohhh! How pathetic are they?”

“Oh good! I thought I was the only one who was feeling like they were our kids and we were setting them up on a blind date!”

“It’s cute though,” Megha said.

“As my dad would say, ‘its progress.’ So we have some talking to do. Well, at least I do at the request of Rocky,” Vijay said.

“Oh really? I have some words that I wanted to share from Komal too,” Megha said matter of factly. “But I’m under orders to hear what Rocky might have to say first.”

Although not a full room yet, the line to the bar was already long, giving Megha and Vijay time to talk before ordering. “Okay bottom line, is the idea of Rocky and Komal a good idea or a bad idea?” Vijay

asked.

“A good idea, at least from what I know,” Megha replied vaguely.

“So if I were to talk to Rocky, would it be appropriate for me to advise him to ‘bust a move’? Would there be proper reciprocation?”

Megha laughed. “I would say that, as you have asked, if Rocky makes the first move, that is if he wants to, then he probably will be pleased with the results.”

By then they had reached the front of the line. Rather than ordering wine, Vijay instead ordered four glasses of champagne. After ordering, he looked to Megha, “We might as well celebrate something, don’t you think?”

“I agree,” Megha said with a smile.

“Okay then,” Vijay nodded his head, and picked up two glasses of champagne. Megha picked up the other two glasses and they rejoined Komal and Rocky.

“Vijay and I were talking in line and we thought since we were close to the end of the convention, we should have champagne instead,” Megha announced.

“Why don’t we each take a crack at a toast?” Vijay suggested.

“All right,” everyone agreed.

“Here’s to possibilities,” Komal said starting the toasts, raising her glass, and looking intently at Rocky where the possibilities were most likely to exist.

“Here’s to old friends…and new ones,” Megha said, raising her glass, looking at first Komal and Vijay and then Rocky.

“Here’s to possibilities,” Rocky said, raising his glass, returning Komal’s gaze with one of his own.

“Wait, that one’s already been used by Komal!” Vijay complained, interrupting the flow of toasts.

“I know,” Rocky said, looking at Komal, “But it’s an important one and deserves to be said again.”

“I agree,” Megha said, defending the toast, not allowing Vijay to give Rocky a hard time.

“My turn?” Vijay asked around for verification, they all nodded. He then said with a grin, “Here’s to possibilities.”

“Shut up!” They all yelled at him.

“What? It’s important enough to say twice, but not three times?” Vijay laughed.

“Come on!” Megha whined. “Seriously!”

Vijay raised his glass, and started, “First of all, I wanted to say…”

Rocky interrupted him. “Remember, it’s a toast. Not a story.”

“Oh. Geez! So many restrictions!” Vijay said, dropping his glass for a second to rethink his words. He looked around, seeing people clumsily meeting each other with their badges on in full matrimonial fashion. He looked at Megha, Komal, and then Rocky, and then he raised his glass back up to theirs and said, “Here’s to a fun and great convention, here’s to an even better convention next year, and here’s hoping that none of us have to be at next year’s convention,” and with that, they all clinked their glasses together hoping their fates matched his wishes.

The crowds in the room had grown tremendously. “Okay, I don’t know about you guys, but I’m ready to meet some new people. Megha, what do you say we make a bet on who meets more people.”

“Okay,” Megha said. “What do you have in mind?”

“Phone number contest. Winner is the one with the most phone numbers by the end of the night,” explained Vijay.

“What?” Megha protested. “Why would we do that? Everyone’s phone number is already on that list. There’s no need to ask for them.”

“You’re wrong! There’s a huge difference between calling from a list or calling from a given number,” Vijay said.

“Why?” Megha asked.

“First, I know my number, as well as many of the ones on the list, is a phone number to my parents’ house. So if I met someone interesting tonight, I wouldn’t want to call their parents first. I mean, how embarrassing is that?!”

“That’s true,” Megha could see some merit to the argument.

“But more importantly, if someone writes down their number for you after you ask for it, you at least know there is some possible interest on their part to hear from you. It’s not like some blind call from someone going down the alphabet.”

“Yeah. That’s true too,” Megha admitted. “Okay, I’m in. Loser buys the others a drink at midnight.” Megha agreed.

“How about you guys?” Vijay asked Rocky and Komal.

“You know what? We were just talking. We were thinking of maybe taking a walk around the convention center. I was telling Komal about the gardens and fountain outside. We’ll catch up with you later tonight though.”

“Sure,” Vijay understood. “Shall we start?” Vijay asked Megha, having used the bet as a means to separate him and Megha from Rocky and Komal.

“Well, as our parents would say, the night’s not getting any younger and neither are you!” Megha said laughing again.

The rest of the evening Vijay and Megha continued to laugh in the safety of each other, with each of them going on brief excursions to meet new people at the pushing request of the other. Vijay reacquainted himself with Priya, who he had not really spoken with since the first day. Megha, on the other hand, had been approached by a guy named Sumeet who even she admitted had potential.

By midnight, Vijay went to the bar and sat down. He had just danced with Priya for three straight dances. She danced like her personality, full of bubbly energy and with that ever present and effervescent smile. She was one of three women Vijay either had met or was introduced to that showed promise. Vijay had collected each of their phone numbers along with several others. As he came to the bar he saw Megha there waiting for him.

“Look at you? The dancin’ machine!” she laughed.

“At least I wasn’t leading the Macarena dance like you. And what was that other thing you were doing on the stage? You must have had four guys thrusting and gyrating around you!” Vijay laughed.

“Thrusting and gyrating?!” Megha replied laughing back. “Please don’t use those words around my parents, although it did get me eight quality phone numbers.”

“Only eight? I’ve got nine.” Vijay took out a sheet of paper with phone numbers. “Buy me that drink now, I need it after all the work I did to get these!”

“Very impressive!” Megha said looking at the sheet.

“I would have had ten numbers, but one of the women was a little miffed. I asked for her phone number and she said she would be happy to give it to me. But then when I took out my sheet for her to write on, she told me she didn’t just want to be one of the millions I was putting the moves on and turned away.”

“So we at least learned there’s a proper way to get numbers. One per page!” Megha said. She ordered two drinks.

“So you met some great guys, huh?” Vijay asked.

“Well, I’m sure they’re all great. It’s kinda like you said. I just don’t know. I hope they call me so I get a chance to find out.”

“Hey, take a look,” Vijay pointed to the dance floor. Rocky and Komal were dancing close together. Both with smiles and a look of happiness that was evident even from across the room. “You know, we’re responsible for that.”

“They do look good together. So happy,” Megha sighed.

“Why the sigh?” Vijay asked.

“Well, seeing them like that is kinda bittersweet. They’ve each found someone. At least I hope they have. It makes me happy. But at the same time…” she trailed off with a sigh “I’m sad that it’s all hap

pening.”

“What?” Vijay asked.

“Why can’t that happen to me? I just don’t understand. I feel like everyone around me is finding someone, but I can’t seem to. Now that Komal might have Rocky, I’m just that much more alone,” she said quietly.

“You know, I’ve been feeling the same thing a little,” Vijay admitted.

Megha sighed, “What are we talking about? They only just met. It doesn’t necessarily mean anything…” Inside, however, they both knew something wonderful had happened for Komal and Rocky. “I am just oh so tired of this all. I want it to end. I do!” Megha looked thoughtfully towards the dance floor. A slow song was being played and in front of them were a number of couples, including Rocky and Komal, dancing while she and Vijay sat at the bar thinking wishfully and wistfully.

“Here,” Vijay raised his glass, beckoning Megha to do the same. “To possibilities.”

“To possibilities,” Megha echoed.

It was official. The Gujarati Matrimonial Convention was over. And while Rocky and Komal may have found each other, for Megha and Vijay, as they walked out of the room, they found themselves in the same status as they had coming to the convention. Single and looking for that elusive right person to share the rest of their lives with, with only a list of phone numbers and the hopes that came with them.

19

I’m on the Phone Again

“Yes, hello?” a voice answered the telephone.

“Greetings! Could I please be speaking to Ms. Mona Patel from New York?” the caller asked with a heavy Indian accent.

“This is she,” Mona replied warily.

“Oh hello! Hello! It is being so nice to be talking to you! I am understanding that you are looking for matrimonial alliance and I was requesting…” the caller continued.

“Oh let me guess,” Mona said with a sigh. “You want a copy of the video biodata.”

“Video? Biodata? Video biodata? Wait, please explain,” asked the caller perplexed.

“Yes, the video biodata. The one that shows me cooking and cleaning and taking care of a family. All the potential in-laws want to see a copy of that first to know I can keep a house in order during the marriage. After all, anyone can just write something in a plain old biodata,” Mona explained.

“How did you know it was me!?” Vijay started laughing, no longer able to conceal his identity. Mona had left a message earlier that day and he was returning her call.

“Please! I can recognize your voice from a mile away no matter how heavy the fake accent!” Mona laughed back.

“So what’s going on?” Vijay asked.

“Not too much. I had just called earlier to catch up and see how you were doing. So tell me, how did the rest of the convention turn out?”

Vijay told her how the convention definitely got better that last evening because everyone had put down their pretenses and increased their willingness to meet new people before it was too late. He also told her about Rocky and Komal and how, although after only just a few hours of their being together, it seemed so right so quickly for them. Although he never was a proponent for quick alliances as their parents had undergone, he appreciated the fact that when it seemed so obviously right, not much time was needed in order to figure that out.

“Yeah, he’s totally gone gaga!” Vijay groaned. “Would you believe that he called her the second he landed back in LA?”

“Wow! He totally violated industry standards!” Mona spoke along the same terms as Valerie. “You’re right, he must really like her!” Mona laughed. “What about you? I hope you’re pursuing your leads diligently.”

“I am,” Vijay admitted. He had just finished an hour long call with a girl named Sapna from Atlanta and was in the kitchen cooking while he talked to Mona. “In fact, there are all kinds of women who’ve been calling me that I hadn’t even met at the convention. I guess that spread sheet with all of our information got faxed all across America after the convention was over.”

“All kinds of women are calling you? This sounds really promising!” she said excitedly for him.

“Considering that I’ve never even met any of them, who really knows how promising any of this might turn out. What about you? Has your phone been ringing off the hook?”

“No, I can’t say that it has,” Mona responded. “But like I was telling you, I don’t think I really want it to at this point in my life. Besides, I wasn’t exactly giving the ‘looking to get married’ signal out that weekend, if you know what I mean.”

“Well, you’re lucky. This calling stuff takes a lot of time,” Vijay said with a sigh, “and it takes a lot out of me.”

“There’s just no pleasing you!” Mona complained vigorously. “You tell me you’re down when you have no one to meet and now you’re upset when you have too many to meet! You never know! One of these new ones may be the one! Then it’ll all seem totally worth it!”

“You’re right,” Vijay conceded. “Thanks for reminding me. In fact, I think I’ll call back one of the women right now,” Vijay said good bye.

“Are you married?” Vijay asked over the phone. It was a week later on Sunday afternoon and he had returned to his apartment from his parents’ house earlier that day.

“No need to worry on that one, believe me!” Megha laughed. “I went straight home after the convention! There were no honeymoons!”

“So how are all the convention men in your life?” Vijay asked.

“Oh, they’re all doing just fine, but I’m in the process of doing some quality control. Sumeet, that guy I met the last night, is really the only one with any potential,” Megha said with a sigh. “How about you? Who’s on your list?”

“It might be easier to tell you who’s not on my list!” Vijay groaned. “I’ve gotten calls back from women that I called earlier plus a whole bunch of other women who’ve called me out of nowhere!”

“Well, that’s not surprising. If you run down the list you’ll see that your competition isn’t very stiff. You’d be a great catch…for anybody,” Megha added very quietly, as if the comment was a revelation only for herself to hear that unexpectedly had slipped out.

Vijay didn’t catch Megha’s last comment, although the change in her tone of voice nagged at him for a second making him feel like something important had just happened. Unfortunately, just as she had uttered that statement, Vijay heard a beep indicating that he had another call. “Hang on a second,” he said to Megha and clicked to the other line. After a few moments, Vijay came back. “Hey Megha, I told you I’ve been constantly on the phone with all these women. I’ve gotta go and introduce myself to someone new again,” he said with a sigh. “I’ll talk to you later and tell you all about the latest one,” he promised as he said good bye, not at all realizing that he may have missed something very important.

“Hi, Vijay?” the voice asked on the phone.

“Hey Mona, how are you?” Vijay responded.

“I’m okay. I’m surprised you recognized my voice given all the women who you must be talking with every day,” she joked.

“Believe me, over time I’ve gotten to know you better than most of the others.” And it was true, Vijay realized. As they had gotten to know each other, they had started to call more often and Vijay had actually opened up to her just as she had to him. In fact, they no longer were just friends, but rather were good friends. Gone were the days of playing games to make sure he didn’t get hurt by Mona. “Actually, that’s part of the problem.”

“What?” she asked.

“I guess I’m talking to all these women on the phone and it’s beginning to feel like a job interview. I tell one woman my whole life story and my little jokes and experiences, hang up, and then do the same thing with the next person. It’s starting to sound so canned to me now. I hate it!”

“That’s what happens when you’re talking to a lot of women at the same time. Imagine what it would have been like if you were dating all of them. Your hands would really be full then!” Mona tried to make light of the situation.

Vijay agreed. If he could have had his way, he would have liked to have spread them all out over time so that he could properly devote time and attention to each woman that had potential. Even his parents commented that it wasn’t a good situation, saying that talking to so many at the same time would only confuse things, and he would never pick one if always given so many choices. The problem with that was that he had met all these women at the convention during the same weekend. Not to call them back shortly thereafter would, as he liked to say it, make the lead stale. In which case, his parents would probably then say he wasn’t trying hard enough. Either way, he was in an unfavorable predicament.

“Calling all these new women at the same time, though, worries me. I feel like I’m starting to repeat stories because I can’t keep track of what I’ve told anyone. I bet most of the women I’ve been talking to think I’m an airhead now because of that!”

“At least you’re given a chance to prove you’re an airhead!” Mona replied. “I get categorized as one before anyone has even talked or met me!”

“Why would anyone think that about you?” asked Vijay, perplexed. Mona was in fact one of the more intelligent and sophisticated women he knew.

“Just because they look at the biodata and see that I’m going to fashion school. They just automatically assume that I’m some bimbo who couldn’t get a real degree and that I’m using this as a time-pass until I get an M.R.S.”

“I guess everyone gets so wrapped up in the stereotypes and the things that they’ve heard or seen in writing, that they don’t even bother to actually get to know the person and who they’re all about.”

“The problem is, though, that when you’re going through this, you don’t really get a lot of time to get to know the person to get beyond those stereotypes,” Mona said.

Vijay paused, letting those words sink in. “You’re right. I guess we can only hope that we meet someone who takes the time to get to know and understand us for who we really are.”

20

What was it that I was looking for?

“Megha?” Vijay asked. He had called her late at night.

“Vijay?” she asked. “All right, let’s hear it,” she anticipated a dilemma had presented itself to him that he needed to discuss with her. She audibly yawned in the hopes of waking up, only causing Vijay to uncontrollably yawn back a response.

“Well, one of the women that I’ve been talking to after the convention, her name is Vibha, has been calling me quite a bit,” Vijay explained.

“And this is a problem because?” asked Megha, pushing the issue forward.

“Well, now she’s calling me all the time, and to be honest with you, I’m not so sure I’m interested in her anymore.”

“So tell her that. Okay, goodnight!” Megha gave the quick fix answer in the hopes of getting some sleep. She knew she would not be so lucky.

“I just did and it was hard! How do you tell someone you’re not interested? That just seems so mean! I tried to do it discretely at first. You know, using my PPMs,” responded Vijay.

“What was that again?” Megha asked, a little uncertain.

“You know, my platonic prophylactic measures,” Vijay repeated. “I’ve tried to give her discreet clues that I’m not interested during the last few phone calls, but she’s just clueless!” he said in an exasperated tone.

“Give me some examples of what you do, maybe that’ll help me understand better,” Megha requested curiously.

“If we’re talking on the phone, I’d ask her about the other guys she was talking to and would try to tell her about the guys that I could set her up with,” explained Vijay. “I was even telling her about the other girls that I was talking to just so I could maybe make her think I thought of her only as a friend.”

“And you did this why?” Megha asked, suddenly in a quiet tone, almost as if she too, had at some time been unknowingly subjected to the same measures.

“Because hopefully I could give her enough hints about how I felt so that it never came to a point of my having to tell her outright that I wasn’t interested. That way there’s no real rejection that has to come to the surface,” said Vijay.

“So, your PPM measures didn’t do the trick?” Megha asked.

“No. Despite all I said, she told me today that she really liked me and asked me what I thought of her,” said Vijay. “She totally put me on the spot!”

“So you put an end to it?” Megha asked, following the progression of the conversation.

“Yeah,” Vijay sighed. “It wasn’t as easy as I would have liked it to be. I think the reason was that Vibha really is great. But even though every guy I talk to thinks she’s awesome, for some reason I just didn’t get that kind of feeling for her.”

Megha let out a sigh in response. “A part of me wants to empathize with you. Everyone has their own tastes so it doesn’t matter whether other guys think she’s awesome. It just matters what you think. But there’s another part of me that just thinks you could just be acting like a huge idiot!” Megha said with a rise in her voice.

“What do you mean?” Vijay yelped, surprised at the attack. “I thought we were trying to help me, not take shots at me!”

“The only reason I say that it is because it sounds like maybe you could have liked her. But maybe because there just wasn’t any chase you lost interest. It was too easy, wasn’t it?” Megha interrogated him. She sensed that Vijay now was a slave to the Rules.

“I don’t know,” Vijay said, admitting confusion, but also in his tone admitting that Megha might have hit the mark on why he wasn’t as interested in Vibha.

“If you stop and think about it, it’s a little ironic. You always complain to me how women fall for the jerks who don’t treat them nicely while the nice guys finish last. This is the female version. It’s only when a woman is a bitch, plays games, and is unavailable that a guy is most interested. Nice girls who just tell a guy that they’re interested end up finishing last too.”

“I guess I never thought of it that way. To think, our parents all this time have been looking for nice guys and nice girls for us,” said Vijay, in a revelation.

“When all along, they should have been looking for bitches and jerks!” Megha finished his sentence.

To: m.patel@nyu.fashion.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: Update/status

Mona,

Hope all is going well out there in the big city. Sorry I haven’t gotten back to you recently. As you know, I’ve been busy getting introduced to women. For a while I thought I had met Ms. Right. It was only later that I realized she considered her last name to be ‘All the Time’. But I guess I could take her last name given that my first name is ‘Lonely’.

I wanted to send you a card for the holidays but it was too late. I thought about sending you one of those e-mail holiday cards, maybe even one of those virtual bouquets, but I thought how corny is that! Needless to say, I got one of those today, so maybe that’s why it’s on my mind. It was too godawful cute for my taste.

Vijay

To: vpatel@mwe.com From: m.patel@nyu.fashion.edu Re: Update/status

Virtual bouquets? So who’s the latest love struck girl you’ve been talking to? Mona

To: m.patel@nyu.fashion.edu From: vpatel@mwe.com Re: Update/status

Oh, this woman I met at the convention named Priya sent the virtual bouquet to me. Don’t get me wrong about whatever I might have written in my e-mail to you. She’s really great.

Let me see. How would I describe her to you? Well, Priya is great. Did I already say that? Well, maybe I should describe her as great. Yeah.

That’s it. She is the kind of person that makes you feel good about human-ity…the one dressed in white. Simple. Sweet. Honest. Bubbly. Any and all of the above. Parents describe her as a ray of sunshine. She seems perfect, don’t you think? But all I can think of, after getting to know her for a while, is that if she’s a ray of sunshine, I need a pair of sunglasses.

I think a person needs to have some clouds in their life. Provide some shade. Maybe even a little turmoil and stormy weather. She’s like a laddoo. All sweet without a few nuts is too much to take.

Vijay

To: vpatel@mwe.com From: m.patel@nyu.fashion.edu Re: Update/status

Vijay,

Let me see if I understand you correctly. You don’t think you like Priya because you think she is right. It makes me wonder if you might be wrong. I hope you know what you’re looking for because I’m a little confused by your logic and I wonder if you might not be yourself. Even if she’s really sweet, you certainly appear to be nuts enough for her.

You may need to take a step back from everything and figure out again what you’re looking for. It would be a shame if the perfect woman passed you by and you didn’t even know it.

Mona

21

It Happened so Quickly

“Have you heard the news already?” Megha asked Vijay over the phone. It was Sunday evening, several months since the convention.

“Yes, I just did. Can you believe it? I’m still in shock,” said Vijay. Earlier Rocky had called to let him know that he had just gotten engaged to Komal during his visit to see her and her family. “He hadn’t even thought about getting a ring yet!” Vijay exclaimed, thinking about how opposed to the subject he had been when Vijay had brought it up last week for fear of jinxing things.

“Who would have thought a few months after the convention that they would decide to tie the knot!” Megha said, also in disbelief. “Well, his parents did go with him to meet Komal’s family so something must have happened to push things.”

Piecing their stories together, it became evident that no one, not even Rocky or Komal, had thought the weekend would have actually resulted in an engagement. Rocky’s parents and Komal’s parents had gotten along amazingly well together, and after dinner, all of them were in the same room and the question was raised as to how Rocky and Komal saw things between them. It was only then, Rocky would later recall to Vijay, that he realized how big a decision it had been to have his parents meet her family. How everything accelerated at light speed after that. It was almost as if the group collective made the decision for them. And before anyone could blink, Rocky and Komal were officially engaged.

“Oh, and get this!” Megha offered more news, “They’re already planning to get married this summer!”

“That’s just a few months away from now!” Vijay reacted. The whole situation just seemed so unreal. Rocky believed, just like Vijay had, about wanting to take the time to get to know someone before committing. And yet, here he was getting engaged within months and married shortly thereafter.

“This is all just so weird! Straight out of India.” Megha exclaimed.

“I know! Not very romantic!” Vijay concurred.

“Even still, it somehow feels right,” Megha said wistfully.

22

Revisiting Old Friends

The airplane took off into the night sky. It was nine at night on the fourth of July and Vijay, Rocky, and a number of Rocky’s relatives and family friends sat throughout the plane in assorted pairs. Their destination was Gainseville, Florida. That was where Komal’s family lived and where the wedding was being held.

Vijay sat in the window seat with Rocky on his right. As they gained altitude Vijay was transfixed by the night sky. Below them fireworks were still exploding for miles around. Vijay was always fascinated at the big exploding blossoms of fireworks while growing up. As a child, on every 4th of July he would drag his parents to the ‘Safe and Sane’ booths set up in the supermarket parking lots in order to buy an assortment of pyrotechnics. He was always so anxious for the sun to sink below the horizon to kick off the warm summer evening, with the accompanying darkness serving a more contrasting background for the sounds and accompanying flashes of brilliance that came with setting them off. He could also recall sitting in the neighborhood park with hundreds of other people as wave after wave of fireworks would fill the sky with Neil Diamond’s “We come to America” blaring tinily on the outdoor recreation park loudspeakers. He always dragged his brother and parents to the park early so that they could stake out their 10 x 10 foot of blanket space closest to the fields where the fireworks would be safely launched from a distance into the sky. He always longed to be even closer.

Now he saw the fireworks from an altogether different perspective; from up above, although seemingly from just as far away as from when he was on the ground. He wondered if the excitement and awe he held for them would dissipate by seeing them from his vantage point. As if the whole concept of fireworks was nothing more than a facade, brilliant to those below, who were intended to see them, but nothing but a false background for those who were behind the scenes. But as the panoply of flower-like explosions unfolded in inverted fashion in the sky below, Vijay’s fascination remained constant. Fireworks, both in the night sky, and in what he was looking for when he met someone, still remained something important to him, despite the doubts that crept into his mind over the past few years as to whether those kinds of fireworks would ever go off in his own life with the right person.

As the plane leveled off and the fireworks disappeared in the distance, Vijay turned away from the window and looked at Rocky. Rocky had been talking to one of his aunts who was sitting in the aisle seat two rows in front of them. From a row behind them, but in the middle section of seats in the plane, Vijay could also hear Rocky’s parents talking excitedly to other relatives about whether everything had been packed and brought and how everything was to be handled once they landed.

“Man!” Vijay grinned at Rocky. “Is this a charter flight? I bet between all of your family we have half the seats on this plane!”

Rocky agreed, rising up in his seat slightly, peering over the head of the passenger in front of him, looking forward and backwards, confirming in his mind what Vijay had just said. “I’ve got a big family and I guess this is what you’ve gotta do when you find someone to marry clear across the country.”

“Yeah. But because it was on the other side of the country, think how much you lucked out! You didn’t have to do much to help with the wedding. I remember when Amit got married. He had to spend every weekend for six months meeting photographers, seeing wedding sites, smelling flowers. But you! You just get to fly in and take the bride away. Not really a bad way of doing it after all.” Vijay theorized.

“That is one advantage,” Rocky agreed, “but when it’s far away like this, it’s tougher getting a lot of your friends to come. Although a lot of my family is going to be there, not very many friends will. That’s why I really appreciate your making the trip with me.”

Vijay shrugged his shoulders and smiled. “Well, you gotta have your best man there. Besides, I practically introduced you to your wife to be. I had to see the happy ending!”

Rocky sighed. “I miss the old days when you, Amit and I would hang out. I’m really bummed that he couldn’t make it,” he said wistfully.

In fact those days did seem like the good old days. It had been a long time since they had done something together, just the guys. “He wanted to. But it’s Sonia’s parents’ 25th anniversary and they had planned a big surprise party months ago. There was no way he was going to be able to pull it off,” explained Vijay as Amit had explained to him. The excuses came often. They were always good excuses, neither of them ever doubted Amit’s desire to do more things with them, but it didn’t make missing him any easier. “Things change, especially when you get married. If not your desires on what you want to do, then at least your obligations on what you have to do,” said Vijay thoughtfully.

“Well not for me,” Rocky promised with conviction.

“Please! Komal doesn’t even live in Southern California and I already do fewer things with you,” Vijay pointed out that the change that had affected Amit had already begun to take effect on Rocky.

Rocky closed his eyes for a few moments. He then opened them and said, “You probably are right. I guess when you get married, you tend to do different things. Married couple things. Maybe once we’re all coupled up, we can start doing more things together like we did in the past. They may be different things, but at least we’ll do them together.”

“Great,” Vijay sighed. “You, Komal, Amit, and Sonia get to have all the fun in the marriage club and I’ll just wait outside.”

“Oh stop being so melodramatic! You’re going to find someone soon and then it’ll be just like the good old days again. Think about it! The wives will all go shopping and we’ll all go play ball and work out. It’ll be the best of the single and married life.”

“You’re assuming of course Komal, Sonia, and whoever I end up with like each other. Not always the case, you know,” Vijay continued to make it sound like a bad situation for him.

“Then you’d better make sure you’re future wife at least gets along with Komal!” Rocky admonished Vijay.

“Just what I need!” groaned Vijay. “I already have to find someone who not only meets my approval, but my family’s too. Now I’ve got to find someone that my friends’ wives like as well? I don’t think they’ve made the woman that can live up to all those requirements!”

“That’s not true. In fact, I know of someone who meets all those requirements and then some,” Rocky said with a sly grin.

“Well lay it on me. Who is this mystery woman?” Vijay was interested in hearing who Rocky had in mind.

“It’s so obvious sometimes that we all want to punch you for not realizing it,” Rocky complained. “Megha!” he said in a “duhhh” tone.

Vijay’s reaction was automatic, “Megha? Please! We’re just good friends, nothing more.”

“So what?” Rocky was not one to be turned away too easily. “You’re friends. That doesn’t mean something can’t still come out of it if it’s right.”

Vijay unbuckled his seat belt and turned to face Rocky more directly. “Let me explain something to you. When you meet someone, you can take one of two paths. The friends path or the romance path. Megha and I have been down the friend’s path for some time now. And the one thing I’ve learned is that once you go down one path, you can’t go back on to the other one. They’re two different paths and to try to cross over only gets you lost.” Hearing it out loud only confirmed again in Vijay’s mind the truth to the statement. His friendship with Megha had grown to be important to him over time and he didn’t want to weird up that relationship by trying to take it somewhere that it didn’t seem like it should or could go.

Rocky listened with his eyes closed. He thought about what Vijay had said for a few minutes thoughtfully. Just before he drifted to sleep, he replied, “Just keep in mind that we always say we want our wives to be our best friends. Why can’t we have our best friends be our wives?” And with those prophetic words he fell asleep.

Vijay looked at him and thought about what Rocky said for a second. In the back of his mind he wondered if he had just experienced some sort of epiphany. But before he could marshal more attention and effort to figure it out, sleep overcame him. Tomorrow would be a big day, and in the dark plane racing through the night sky, two friends, one soon to be married, the other hoping to find someone to marry, continued down the various paths that they had chosen. One certain in his path, the other never more lost.

They landed in Florida at four in the morning. In a caravan of three rented Dodge Caravans, one of which Vijay had been designated to drive, they tailgated and finally reached the motel where Komal’s parents had rented out a number of rooms for them. They all fell asleep before anything was even unpacked.

Waking up late the next morning, a brunch was waiting for the jaan, otherwise known as Rocky’s wedding party. Other relatives of Rocky’s who had taken different flights or who had driven from nearby locations were also staying at the motel, increasing the number of people there to close to eighty. For the guests, nothing remained to be done until the evening. It was more a time for relatives to catch up with each other. It hadn’t been since a wedding of a cousin of Rocky’s three years ago that the whole family had come together. Rocky’s lengthy search had resulted in a number of stories that had been stockpiled, waiting to be told when all were assembled again. For Rocky, it was part of the package of getting married. Stories of his childhood were retold by relatives who had raised him, proud now to see him on the verge of entering into a new phase in life.

As evening approached, everyone returned to their rooms to get ready. Vijay had his own room and put on his jubbo lango outfit after taking a long shower. He turned around from the bathroom door and looked at himself in the mirror. He then sighed, as he stared at his reflection. A feeling of deja vu overcame him. He recalled staring in front of a mirror just before Amit’s garba raas wearing the same outfit. He then thought of Jennifer. It all seemed so long ago. And as he stared in the mirror, he thought to himself that he felt old. It felt as if a lifetime had passed him by. He closed his eyes for a second, wishing and hoping that when he opened his eyes, the woman he had been seeking so long would be standing beside him, with her reflection next to his. He opened his eyes. It was only his reflection looking back. Alone.

Vijay pulled the van into the parking lot of one of the better Holiday Inns that Vijay had seen. Rocky felt vindicated, saying “I told you it was nice” to the others in the van. Evidently there had been a running joke by his relatives when they had heard the garba raas program was at a Holiday Inn that Rocky was going to be married in a tiny motel with dinner and drinks coming out of the vending machines.

The parking lot was only half full and so they did not have far to walk into the main lobby. As they entered through the doors, Vijay recognized many of Rocky’s relatives waiting by the front reception area. Just like the other weddings Vijay had attended, none of them were entering into the room where the garba raas program was being held until Rocky and everyone else from the family had arrived. A grand entrance was to be made by all of them.

Once they had all congregated, Rocky, with his parents, led the group in. News of their arrival had long reached those inside as they had already gathered near the entrance waiting for them. Komal greeted Rocky with a smile with her parents behind her beaming proudly as well. Despite his feelings of loneliness and of self-pity, Vijay couldn’t help but suppress a smile as he could sense the overwhelming warmth and happiness they were all sharing at that moment. It was as if up to that time, none of them truly believed the wedding would actually happen. But now that it was, a heavy burden was being lifted and their lives could be fun again.

Vijay followed Rocky and Komal as everyone spilled in through the hallway. The room was fairly large and more than a few hundred people had already arrived. Once inside, Vijay scanned the faces of the guests from Komal’s side. In fact, one of the more positive aspects that Vijay envisioned coming out of this wedding was the fact that there would be an entirely new crowd there with new women for him to meet.

The room was a large square, and Vijay turned left, away from where Rocky and Komal were busy being introduced to family and guests. Vijay headed towards an informal bar that was set up with soft drinks and water. It was no different than those days when he, Rocky, and Amit caroused as single men at parties. A drink of any sort in hand lent comfort, especially now for Vijay as he had neither Rocky nor Amit to give him the company they had given him in the past.

With a glass of water in hand, Vijay moved to a corner and surveyed the room more carefully. Out of the several hundred guests who had arrived, only but a handful were female in his age group. That was to be expected. What both surprised and saddened Vijay, however, was that many of them looked familiar. Although he had not ever talked to these women, he could recognize them from the convention or he had some recollection of being shown their picture before. Evidently everyone at his age was well circulated, including him. And the reason he had not talked to these women before would be the same reason that he probably would not be pursuing any of them at Rocky’s wedding. He stood there and wondered to himself. Had he met every eligible woman in the country? Although he knew that was not possible, it certainly was feeling that way. What greatly disturbed him was if that was the case, then what did it mean that he hadn’t yet found the right person?

As he stood there and pondered that thought, he felt a tap on his shoulder. The singer had already begun singing and the women were already forming circles getting ready to start the garba portion of the program. “If I’m going to have to make the rounds, I fully expect you to be there with me.”

Vijay turned and faced Megha. She was dressed in a beautiful red and green chaniya chori, worthy of an outfit to be worn by the bride’s best friend. His internal heavy sighs and feelings of loneliness vanished. Megha could always bring a smile to his face. He smiled at her and said, “Thank goodness! I thought I was going to have to bear this evening alone.”

“How are you?” she inquired putting aside her fun facade for the moment.

“Okay, I guess, given where we are and everything,” said Vijay shrugging his shoulders.

“I know,” Megha sighed. “These weddings can be kinda tough nowadays.”

Vijay shook his head. “It’s kind of a shame. Going to weddings used to be so fun. It was like going to a huge Indian party. You always hoped that you would meet someone new and all the excitement that comes with that. But looking around, I don’t know if there’s anyone new left.”

“Either the parties are getting old or we are,” Megha agreed with Vijay’s sentiment.

There was a cheer from the crowds interrupting their conversation. Vijay and Megha looked over to the center of the room to see Rocky and Komal officially starting the first circle of garba. At the sight of that, Vijay’s spirits rose. “You know what? I’m glad to be here. We helped to make that happen,” Vijay pointed to Komal and Rocky.

Komal was gliding gracefully while Rocky was following behind in herky-jerky fashion out of tune with the music, grinning broadly not only because he knew that he looked terribly awkward, but also because Komal was trying unsuccessfully not to laugh every time she turned to face him.

“You’re right! Just think! The convention Marriage Thermometer goes up at least one degree because of us,” Megha said smiling. “And this is the eighth one already. Those organizers are loving it!”

“What?” Vijay asked. “How do you know that?”

“Didn’t you get the Convention Newsletter?” Megha asked. “They write about the weddings that have taken place because of the convention. In fact, remember that guy Jigar you introduced me to who sat at your table the first night? He just got married.”

“Really?!” Vijay exclaimed in surprise. “Jigar? That guy who was so shy that he couldn’t even talk to women without his relatives there to help him form the words?” Vijay said.

“I guess his relatives were good talkers,” Megha said with a shrug.

The people dancing in circles had begun to solidify into distinct lines for them to join. Vijay waited for a half a rotation, just staring, and then sighed saying “It sure feels like everyone is getting married doesn’t it?”

“Everyone but us,” Megha joined his sigh. “But who cares? There’s no point in dwelling on it. Besides, I’ve got some good money that I bet with Komal that you’re even more uncoordinated at garba than Rocky, and I want to collect on that bet!”

“What a coincidence!” Vijay said laughing, his spirits rising. “I bet Komal that you would be more uncoordinated at garba than Rocky too!”

“Well there’s only one way to settle this!” Megha said, and she led him by the hand to the middle and they joined Rocky and Komal. And as they spun around while the music progressively played faster and louder, Vijay had fun again. Between Vijay, Rocky, and Megha, choosing the most uncoordinated dancer was a tough decision, as each pointed to the other while doubled over in laughter at each other’s antics. As they continued to dance and spin, Vijay hoped the music would never stop. Because while out there on the dance floor with all of his friends, the only thing he could concentrate on was where his feet were going and which way everyone was spinning. There was no time to feel lonely.

Vijay brought the van to a halt in front of the motel. It was half past midnight. Although the garba raas program had ended over half an hour ago, the windows of the van were still steamed on the inside from the heat generated by the passengers having danced all night.

Vijay walked over to his room, pulled off his jubbo lango, and changed into sweats. Rocky had told Vijay to meet up with him in the lobby after he had changed. There was a pool table in one of the side rooms and the thought was that they might be able to play a few games before going to sleep. One last bachelor thing to do for Rocky. Vijay made sure he had the room key, and then walked out through the parking lot to the main lobby. As he entered through the doors, he turned right and entered into a side room to find Rocky still with a number of his relatives and his parents sitting around in chairs. They had all changed and were hanging out, looking very comfortable. Realizing that the bachelor night was not going to happen, Vijay brought a chair over and joined them. Evidently, they were replaying how the evening turned out and were collecting impressions. No doubt somewhere across town Komal’s family was doing the same thing.

“Did you see the gaudy ring that the woman in the green sari was wearing? Or how about that tube top…” the women were talking amongst themselves.

“…and I was talking to Prakash, and he says there are engineering jobs at the TVA plant up in Augusta…” the men were talking amongst themselves.

And in between them all, Vijay, Rocky, and several of Rocky’s closer family relations were talking about Komal.

“Rocky. Everyone loved Komal! We were all so impressed,” one auntie was telling him.

Another interrupted, saying, “And she is soooo beautiful!” All the while, Rocky and his mother sat and accepted all the compliments and praise, beaming.

“Now we know why you waited so long,” another woman nodded in understanding, “thank goodness that you didn’t rush it!”

“Well,” Rocky said, “I knew there was someone special that I was hoping to find, and I’m just glad I found her.”

“All those other women don’t even compare,” Rocky’s mother said enthusiastically. She, to some level like Rocky, had lived through the pains of all the past failures. Having to explain to her friends and family why there still was no wedding for everyone to attend. Now that the time had come, it was her turn to bask and enjoy as well.

As they all sat there talking, one of the aunties turned her attention to Vijay who had joined them in the inner sanctum. “And you? What is your story? Are you engaged as well? Or perhaps married? Where is your wife?” she asked in rapid-fire succession, piling on questions as if she were a reporter at a news conference fighting for air time.

Vijay just looked at her and said, “No. Not yet. I’m still trying to find someone who makes me as happy as Komal makes Rocky,” he answered diplomatically.

“So you are looking?” another auntie asked to confirm. Vijay began to get uneasy. More than one auntie had turned her focus on to him. It was as if a pack of marital wolves, having just killed off Rocky, had just caught scent of new single meat and were preparing to pounce again.

“He is very eligible,” Rocky answered on behalf of Vijay with a grin, knowingly leading the wolves to the prey.

“Oh, I agree,” the auntie sitting behind Vijay admitted, having joined the conversation. Vijay was surrounded.

“Well, if you know anyone special, keep me in mind,” Vijay said forcing a smile although none of them would have noticed it wasn’t natural.

“Special! Everyone is looking for someone special!” another auntie complained in a “these kids nowadays” tone. For some reason all attention in the room had shifted focus to Vijay—in a bad way.

“True. Very true. How old are you?” another auntie agreed with the other.

“Twenty-nine,” Vijay answered.

“And you have not found anyone yet? My goodness!” she said in shock.

“Have you been looking at all?” someone else asked. It felt like one wolf would advance in to draw his attention, allowing others to sneak up with questions behind him.

“Yes. Actually, Rocky and I have gotten to know each other because we’ve both been looking.”

“That’s good. But take our advice,” one of the aunties from an outer circle joined in on the kill. “Don’t wait too long. There might be nobody left if you are too picky,” she intimated negatively.

Vijay desperately wanted to leave. He didn’t feel like hearing this lecture all over again, let alone from people who he didn’t even know. Other than calling them uncle or auntie, everyone in that room besides Rocky and his parents was a stranger to him and there was no other connection. For a few more minutes they continued. Trying to explore the reasons why Vijay had not yet found someone to settle down with, all the while predicting the dire consequences coming from that failure. Vijay was in shock at how quickly this very same group of people who had commended Rocky for waiting for Komal now questioned Vijay about why he was taking so long to find someone.

After a few more minutes of handling the questions with forced smiles, laughs, and jokes, Vijay could take no more of it and excused himself, saying that he was tired. As he headed out of the room he, to his surprise, ran into Rajan uncle in the main lobby.

Rajan uncle looked up and saw Vijay and said, “My goodness! Hello! What a strange place to see your face! To think that we live a few miles apart in California yet we see each other thousands of miles away in Florida!”

“Hi Rajan uncle,” Vijay, too, was surprised to have run into him. “What are you doing here? Are you here for the wedding?”

“Yes. Komal’s father, like Megha’s father, went to school with me when we moved here from India. We are all old and close college friends. Have you seen Megha already?”

“Yes. Actually, at the garba earlier today. We got to talk for a bit,” said Vijay.

“Come, sit down for a second. Let’s catch up. It’s been a while,” Rajan uncle requested.

Vijay didn’t refuse, not only because Rajan uncle was a close family friend, but also because he knew that Rajan uncle, unlike the marital wolves he had left behind, understood better what he was going through.

After Vijay had apprised Rajan uncle of the health and welfare of his parents and brother, Rajan uncle asked the question that was always foremost on everyone’s mind when meeting Vijay “So how is everything going?” intimating, of course, to his search.

“Things haven’t changed much on the marriage front since we last met, except now I’m beginning to feel like I’ve met everyone there is to meet. Even here from strangers…” Vijay pointed to the room where the wolves were still licking their chops from the attack amassed against him, “I’m being told that I can’t be too picky.”

Rajan uncle shook his head and said, “Nonsense! Forget about them!” he said crossly.

“I’m trying,” Vijay said with a smile and a sigh, happy that Rajan uncle had taken his side. “Everyone is so eager to tell me that I need to hurry and find someone, but no one ever focuses on whether I should try to find the right person.”

Rajan uncle listened with sympathy. He then said, “Vijay. Don’t worry about what they say. Stay true to your feelings. If you need to meet a thousand women before you find the right one, then do it. You’ll find her. Nobody will remember that you took so long after you find her, but believe me, if you rush the decision and don’t find the right woman, you’ll regret it for a lifetime.”

“I know. That’s why I keep believing I’m doing this the right way and that’s why I keep looking,” Vijay said tiredly.

“The only thing I will say to you is when you meet a lot of girls this way, it can be confusing. So you need to be sure you know what you are looking for. As long as you can look back to everyone you have met and can say that there are no regrets, that you haven’t let one get away, then you have been doing the right thing, and you need to keep looking as much as you did the first day you started this search.”

And with that, Rajan uncle excused himself and left to go back to Leena auntie in their room. Vijay stood up as well and walked outside in the parking lot on the way to his room. He felt better. Knowing that there was still someone who believed in Vijay’s search helped. And as he walked across the quiet parking lot at night, he looked up at the sky full of stars. He began to think about all of the women he had met along his journey. Knowing now what he didn’t at that time, he replayed whether his decision to move on past each one was a decision that had changed, one that he now regretted. And as he replayed it all from the very beginning, he began to wonder. Had he made a mistake? Just like a star that might not have seemed the brightest or the most brilliant in the early evening sky, as the darkness grew stronger, its shine could only grow. Had he also failed to see the brilliance of someone he had met earlier on in the process? He wondered.

Vijay slipped under the covers in the motel bed and tried to go to sleep. He tossed and turned for what felt like was an hour, only to peek at the alarm clock to realize just five minutes had elapsed. He picked up the phone in the darkness and dialed a number he now knew by heart.

“Hi Vijay. So nice of you to call at a decent time for once,” the voice answered.

“That’s because I’m in your time zone now Mona,” Vijay smiled in the dark. They had been talking often lately, and in the darkness, in a strange motel room in a different city, hearing her voice made him feel like he was comfortably back home again in bed.

She asked how the wedding was going and Vijay told her that as nice and large a wedding as it was, it was kind of lonely because so few friends of theirs had been able to come from home.

“But that’s good isn’t it?” Mona responded. “There must be all kinds of new potentials for you to meet.”

“You’d think so. But maybe I’ve been doing this search thing for too long. It just feels like, even clear across the country, I’ve in some way already been introduced to everyone without anything coming out of it.” Vijay sounded like a child, who after dutifully eating cereal every morning, one bowl at a time for over a week, only now found out that there would be no prize at the bottom of the box. “And then I see Rocky, he’s so amazingly happy. It’s like, I see what’s waiting at the end of the road when I someday find that someone. I can almost reach it, but when I get there, there’s always just more road ahead.” There was a moment of silence. “It’s tough sometimes,” Vijay confessed to Mona.

“There’s an end to it somewhere,” she said reassuringly. “We might not see it yet, but it’s out there.”

“That’s why I was calling. Let me ask you something. What if I missed the turn off for the end and I kept driving down the road, going farther and farther away from my perfect person?” Vijay asked.

“What?” Mona asked.

“Look, I’ve been going through this journey hoping it will end with the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. But well, what if she was someone I had met early on and I just hadn’t realized it at the time?” Vijay theorized out loud.

“What makes you feel like you’ve passed by that right person?” she inquired quietly.

“I don’t know,” Vijay answered pensively. “Maybe it’s because I feel tonight that I finally got to the end of the road and there’s nowhere further to go and she’s not there. And well, if that’s the case, I must have passed her by earlier on,” explained Vijay.

“And you think you can just make a u-turn and go back to her? Why would it be any different than the first time?” Mona asked.

“At least now I know more. I’ve met a lot of women. I know what’s out there and that it doesn’t get any better. Maybe that’ll make the difference the second time around,” theorized Vijay.

“But you’ve got it all wrong! You make it sound like it’s some comparison shopping thing. Now that you’ve gone through the whole store, you know one of the earlier offers is the best deal, so you’re ready to commit to it, whether or not it’s even something you want? Remember, finding your soul mate is not like shopping at Costco!” Mona said emphatically, trying to drive the point home.

“I guess,” Vijay said doubtfully. “Whatever, I could never go back anyway.”

“Why not?” Mona asked.

“Well first of all, it’s like you were saying. I’d probably just be settling,” Vijay said.

“Probably. But you never know. All I was saying was that if you were going back just because you feel like you’ve met everyone and you’re picking the best of the lot, well then, that’s settling. But if something inside of you or if something about her has made things different since you first met, then going back could actually get you to the end of the road.”

Vijay thought about it for a second, as if almost mentally determining whether something had indeed changed. “But how weird would that be? Telling someone I had said ‘no’ to that I would like to try again. That couldn’t work. She’d never be up for it!” Vijay said with a wistful sigh.

“But if it’s right, because things changed, it could happen. Besides, think about it. You’re assuming you’re going back to some woman who really liked you. It’s just as likely that she had some doubts too. Maybe now she’s changed how she feels about you as well.”

“Maybe,” Vijay said doubtfully. He was reluctant to even think of the possibility.

“You once told me that finding the right person was a matter of timing. Maybe the timing wasn’t right the first time. But it doesn’t mean that the timing can’t be right later. Maybe the right time is still ahead with someone you’ve left behind during your journey.” Mona said philosophically.

“All I know is that it’s about time I find someone,” sighed Vijay.

“You will,” Mona promised.

“Or maybe I already have,” Vijay said after thinking things over for a moment. It was as if he had come upon the solution to a puzzle, but he just couldn’t put his finger on it. Every time he reached for it, it just moved beyond his reach. “I’d better go. Thanks for everything. Good-night,” Vijay hung up the phone. He was sleepy finally. He looked at the alarm clock. Just as slowly as the minutes had dragged by earlier, they had flown during their call. The minutes always did when they spoke. It was now three in the morning, midnight Pacific Standard Time. As he pulled the covers around him, he felt just as perplexed and confused as he had when the evening had started. He hoped answers would come to him while he slept.

The next day at the wedding, Vijay, as the best man, sat in a chair next to Rocky in the mandap. The ceremonies were just about to start. An initial attempt had already been made to wrest the shoes away from Rocky and attempts were continually being made whilst he sat there barefoot with Vijay by his side. Several cousins of Rocky had taken on the responsibility of keeping the shoes away from Komal’s side of the family. Vijay thought with a smile that Rocky’s cousins didn’t stand a chance.

Several of the initial ceremonies between Komal’s parents and Rocky had been completed. Komal had not yet made her entrance and neither Vijay nor Rocky had seen her. As in Amit’s wedding, two of Komal’s brothers held up a sheet of fabric dividing the mandap in half, preventing Rocky and Vijay from seeing Komal enter into the room. As they sat in the chairs waiting for her, Rocky took Vijay’s arm and pulled him closer to whisper, “You know, with both of us in the mandap like this, we could make this a double wedding with Komal and Megha if you wanted to! Your dad would love it! He’d get a free wedding!”

“Let’s just concentrate on your wedding for now, okay?” Vijay grinned. Evidently, the Megha campaign still had some life but for the first time, Vijay was not so vehement in his discouragement of the nomination.

At that moment, music started to play. Komal had entered into the room. No longer was there talking amongst the guests or laughter between people. The atmosphere had been transformed, with her entrance, into something electric and different than what existed before.

The music stopped and Rocky and Vijay waited for the sheet to drop. A few more ceremonies took place. All the while Rocky and Vijay stared ahead, waiting for their first glimpse of what was on the other side. The priest then motioned for the sheet to be dropped so that the groom could finally see his bride. And as the sheet dropped, Rocky looked ahead to find Komal and Vijay looked straight ahead and found Megha. But for a second, Vijay had been caught up in the emotions and feelings invoked by the marriage gods. Perhaps his feelings were strong coupled with his desires. But in that split second, when the sheet had been dropped, Vijay could almost imagine himself getting married along side with his friends, to a friend.

Evening had come. The marriage had lasted a good two and a half hours and had gone smoothly. Fifteen minutes had been spent negotiating the return of Rocky’s shoes. As Vijay had predicted, Rocky’s cousins were no match. Two hundred dollars later, the reception was now in full swing and what at a quick glance might have seemed like six hundred new guests, on closer inspection revealed that it was the same cast except with a wardrobe change.

Dinner was just beginning and the wedding party was sitting in a row on a long rectangular table facing the guests. The table was a rather long one with Komal and Rocky in the middle, flanked on either side by their parents and close family, with Vijay and Megha on the ends.

Just before the food was being served, Vijay rose and walked around to the front of the table where a microphone was waiting for him. As best man, Vijay had been given the responsibility to make a speech and to toast the newly married couple.

“If I could have everyone’s attention, please,” Vijay started off projecting loudly. He always was annoyed when people were shy with a microphone, speaking softly and not directly into it, thereby making it impossible to hear what was being said. The room fell silent as everyone turned their attention to him.

“Hello, ladies and gentlemen, uncles and aunties, friends and family. My name is Vijay, not Rocky. I just wanted to say that up front because I was in the mandap during the whole wedding so I didn’t want anyone to be confused as to who really got married!” The crowd laughed.

Rocky joked loudly in the background, “He just wants all the girls to know he’s single!” The comment drew additional laughter.

“Seriously, though,” Vijay continued as the laughter died down. “I know there are many people here that are friends of Komal and her family. People who have only met Rocky for the first time at this wedding. That’s the way it works sometimes when people who live far apart from each other fall in love. And so I wanted to take a few moments to formally introduce you all to Rocky. So that you, too, can know Rocky as I have had the pleasure of knowing him for the many years that we have been friends. But you know, as I sat down trying to put together a list of things describing him, I found it to be no easy task. I wanted to describe him properly. I wanted to describe him just like he would have described himself. And I thought to myself, what better way to do this then to share with you the information he has in his bio-data!”

The crowd laughed again and Rocky groaned in embarrassment as Vijay walked towards him pulling out a folded white piece of paper.

“I could go into how he describes himself as ‘the perfect blend of Western and Indian culture’ and how he loves to ‘go on long walks on warm summer evenings,’ but I think that it, as with most information in a bio-data, doesn’t really give you a good picture of who Rocky is.” Vijay then flashed a picture of Rocky that was attached to his bio-data. Vijay joked, “Actually, this picture doesn’t even really give you a good picture of who Rocky is.” The crowd laughed again.

Vijay continued, “The reason that even his bio-data is not good enough is because Rocky’s great qualities far outnumber anything that could be listed on a piece of paper. He is everything, he does everything, and now, with Komal, he has everything.” The audience clapped.

Vijay then moved over to Komal. “As for Komal, I can’t say that I have spent nearly as much time with her as I have with Rocky. In fact, I probably have known her for no more than four days counting yesterday. But let me tell you, I feel like I’ve known her for years as well. The reason I believe this is because there were so many nights when Rocky and I would just talk, sharing with each other what we were looking for in a soul mate. What characteristics we thought made up our perfect wife. He had wanted someone he was attracted to, someone fun and compassionate. Someone who was caring, to him, to his family, and to people in general. He didn’t want someone whose life would revolve around his. He wanted someone his equal. A best friend and more. These were all the things that Rocky had said he was looking for in his perfect wife, and so I know that Komal has all these characteristics. Because all Rocky can do is talk about how he had found his perfect wife when he met Komal.” The audience clapped again.

“And so I wanted to say to Komal, congratulations. You have found a wonderful husband. And to Rocky. All I can say you are my hero. You knew what you wanted and you waited and you persevered. No compromises. No settling. And I know the ride was tough. But look at you now. You have your perfect wife to share the rest of your life.” Vijay went to the table and picked up a glass and turned to face the audience. “Everyone, please join me in a toast to Rocky and Komal, the married couple. May they have a life full of prosperity, love, and happiness.”

Everyone in the room stood up with glasses held high and joined the toast. As Vijay turned to face Rocky and Komal, he smiled. He could see that every word he had said was true. How, as much as neither of them would ever admit it, from the first drunken night at the convention, some spark had existed between them. And that spark had culminated into fireworks for them. Of that, Vijay was certain.

A cake cutting ceremony followed dinner. After close family members laughingly fed the couple, another hour was spent as each guest joined in a receiving line to wish Rocky and Komal best wishes and to have pictures taken. All the while Vijay and Megha ran around herding relatives from Komal’s and Rocky’s family throughout the room so that appropriate group family photos could be taken. The permutations involved were numerous with pictures having to be taken with each of Rocky’s and Komal’s mother’s and father’s families and assorted combinations amongst these groups.

As the last of the pictures were taken, the deejay announced for everyone to come to the dance floor. Vijay, no longer herding relatives for pictures, followed the crowd to the center of the room.

“And now, the bride and the groom will start us off with the first slow dance,” the deejay spoke over the sound system. Vijay stood with the others on the edge around the dance floor and listened as the song Somebody by Depeche Mode started playing. “I want somebody to share, Share the rest of my life,” the song started. It was Vijay’s favorite song, one of the few he knew the lyrics to.

Although he had been busy running around at the wedding reception, as Vijay stood there watching Rocky and Komal dance, an overwhelming wave of emotions engulfed him. He wondered again if just as Rocky and Komal were destined to be happy together, like so many other of his friends, if he was destined to be alone. Would he be left behind as everyone else moved on with their lives? Was he ever going to find his Somebody?

It had been a while now that he had been looking. For the first time in his life, as he stared onto the dance floor, Vijay genuinely felt that his situation was hopeless. He closed his eyes. Before, he had been very logical about it all. Trying to keep emotion out of the process, he was always able to make himself feel better by confirming that he was doing all that he could to find someone. How by doing all that was possible, he would logically end up with the person he had been looking for since the first day he had started his search. That’s how it was all supposed to work. It was in the brochure. It was like every parent said. Eat your carrots and you’ll have good eyesight. Drink your milk and you’ll grow tall. Be a nice person, and good things will happen. But the reality was, kids who ate carrots still grew up to wear glasses, kids who drank milk still grew up to be short, and people who were nice, who played by the rules and did all that they could do, still didn’t win the race. After all, nice guys finished last, didn’t they?

The song continued to play. “Someone who’ll stand by my side, And give me support, And in return, She’ll get my support…” He felt so alone. Emotion now had completely replaced logic. He opened his eyes and looked around the room. As he scanned the faces around him, he stopped when he came to Megha. She must have felt his stare, for at that moment she looked up at him, smiled weakly and nodded in understanding. He could tell that she was feeling the same emotions that he was.

“…I want somebody who cares, For me passionately…I want somebody, Who will put their arms around me, And kiss me tenderly” As he stood there facing Megha, it suddenly hit him. Clarity. It was as if the fog had finally been lifted. He knew who is Somebody was! The answer having come to him out of nowhere so suddenly almost startled him, but it was so obvious! Was it possible for him to have these feelings? Now? Was he deluding himself? Was he settling by thinking of the possibility?

As he thought about it more standing there, he became more convinced that he was not taking the ill-advised settling shortcut on the journey to finding the right person. His feelings were real. Did this make sense considering everything? He thought about it some more. It did make sense. After all, hadn’t things changed? Much had happened and had been learned since the first time. Things were different; more importantly, things now felt right. At least for him. Maybe one could go from being friends to lovers.

And that led to even bigger questions. Could it work? Was it still possible? Could one go back? Could someone take one back? By answering some questions he had come up with a host of new ones. He didn’t have all the answers. But he knew he had to ask all the questions. He had to find out. He just hoped it wasn’t too late.

THE PERFECT ARRANGEMENT

The sheet was raised in front of Vijay. The pandit had finished the first ceremonies and everyone was now waiting for her to come in. Behind and to the left of him sat Amit and to the right was Rocky. Vijay no longer had any close single friends to sit with him in the mandap so he had asked his two closest friends to sit by his side. The two friends who had helped him get to where he was now—his wedding.

His wedding. It still seemed unreal. As if it were all some dream concocted out of years of fantasizing about this day. Vijay discreetly pinched himself as he sat in the mandap just to make sure it was all really happening. Later, every time they replayed their wedding video, Vijay always pointed out to her when he was pinching himself. How even on the day of their wedding he couldn’t believe such a wonderful thing had happened to him.

She had arrived. Vijay could tell. The room had grown silent. His heart raced even quicker and his excitement grew. From the night of Rocky and Komal’s wedding, when all became clear to him, Vijay had never felt desire, attraction, and longing as strongly as he felt when he thought, talked or was with her. It was as he always dreamed it could be, but always afraid to ever hope or think possible. He had never dared to aspire for these feelings, fearing only disappointment, pain, and failed expectations would result. But he no longer had to be afraid. These emotions and feeling could exist, as he always suspected. But even more importantly, they did exist. They were real. For him. Then, now, and forever.

Vijay looked straight ahead. The sheet dropped and his heart stopped. He saw fireworks, as he had since the first time they had met. He looked lovingly into the eyes of his soon to be wife. His perfect wife. His soul mate. But he had also come to know her as Mona.

After Vijay’s revelation at Rocky and Komal’s wedding, he took an immediate trip to visit Mona. He asked her the very questions that he had raised in his mind that evening and she answered that things had changed, they had grown close, and it could work. She realized that with the right person who understood her, the timing could become right.

And what followed happened quickly. Delay for the sake of delay seemed foolish. And so, almost like a Hindi film where days and months and the happy ending are compressed into ten minutes of footage at the end of three hours of story development and musical interludes, their wedding became a reality.

But for them, it made sense. Because as two pieces to a jigsaw puzzle, they were not being forced together. They had grown to know and love each other. They were a perfect fit. Just as it should be for any two people seeking arranged love.

Table of Contents

Arranged Love

All Rights Reserved © 2002

Contents

Preface

PRE-ARRANGED

1

The End of the Beginning

2

Madame-Ex

3

Love at 21st Sight

4

Love at First Sight at Last

5

A Las Vegas Indian Wedding

6

Lost Shoes Blues

7

A Proposal for a Proposal

8

Einstein’s Theory of Indian Relativity

9

Gentlemen, Start Your Mothers!

MAKING ARRANGEMENTS

1

Looking for Ms. Perfect

2

Looking Good on Paper, it’s all Bio-Debatable

3

Mind, Body and Soul

A RANGE OF OPTIONS

1

An Introduction to Introductions

2

First Contact

3

Progressing to Progress

4

She Could be a One in a Hundred

5

The Perfect Imperfect Person

6

Order Disorder

7

The Rules vs. The Code

8

Let the Games Begin

9

Little Facts

10

The Best of Both Worlds

11

Great Expectations Indian Style

12

The One That Got Away

13

Look Before You Leap

14

Parental Conventions Regarding Matrimonial Conventions

15

The Meet Market—Registration

16

The Meet Market—Day One of Fun

17

The Meet Market—Day Two How Do You Do

18

The Meet Market—Day Three—Now It’s Just You and Me

19

I’m on the Phone Again

20

What was it that I was looking for?

21

It Happened so Quickly

22

Revisiting Old Friends

THE PERFECT ARRANGEMENT