F in Exams

The Very Best Totally Wrong Test Answers

Richard Benson

Table of Contents

Introduction

Chemistry

Biology

Physics

Math

Business & Technology

Psychology

History & Geography

English

Copyright

Introduction

Pop quizzes, midterms, final exams—whatever the test, every student has experienced that terrible moment: You’re sitting at your desk, classmates all around you, test paper in hand, staring at the next question and drawing a total blank.

Maybe you are a student now, putting off studying for the big test tomorrow by reading this book. If so, you won’t find any useful answers. What you will find are hilarious, real responses from students who realized that they had no hope of answering a question correctly, and decided to have a little fun instead.

Whether you’re still in school or you’ve come out safely on the other side, we can all agree that while the spectacle of failure can be highly entertaining, it’s even better to see a FAIL turn into a WIN.

Subject: Chemistry

What is a nitrate?

Give a brief explanation of the meaning of the term “hard water.”

What is a vacuum?

What is the process for separating a mixture of chalk and sand?

What is the process in which steam turns into water?

What is methane?

What is the meaning of the term “activation energy”?

In a blast furnace it is impossible for aluminum to be extracted from its ores. Why?

What type of attractive force or bond holds the sodium ions and chloride ions together in a crystal of sodium chloride?

Over the last 50 years there has been a significant change in the concentration of carbon dioxide. Give a reason for this.

What are the characteristics of crude oil?

Describe the chemical differences between H_2O and CO_2.

What is a vibration?

What is the difference between a hydrocarbon (such as ethane) and an alcohol (such as ethanol)?

The burning of fossil fuels that contain carbon produces a gas called carbon dioxide. Draw a “dot-and-cross” diagram to represent carbon dioxide.

Subject: Biology

What is the lowest-frequency noise that a human can register?

What is the highest-frequency noise that a human can register?

Adam cuts his arm. Blood gushes out and is red in color. What does this show?

What is a fibula?

What is the meaning of the word “varicose”?

What does “terminal illness” mean?

Define enzyme.

Define coenzyme.

What happens during puberty to a boy?

Give an example of a smoking-related disease.

What are the three different types of blood vessels?

Karen goes into her garden one morning and finds the leaves covered in a sticky substance. What is this substance?

What is a plasmid?

How is oxygen loaded, transported, and unloaded in the bloodstream?

Explain the concept of homeostasis.

In the Hawaiian Islands there are around 500 different species of fruit fly. Give a reason for this.

Explain the word “genome.”

Draw a diagram to represent the human body and label the positions of all the major organs, including brain, heart, lungs, and kidneys.

Draw a diagram indicating the location of the appendix.

What is a cadaver?

What is a fossil?

What happens to your body when taking a breath?

What is the world’s largest living mammal?

What happens when your body starts to age?

State a type of fungus and explain one of its characteristic features.

Below is a diagram of the heart. Please label the relevant sections.

Subject: Physics

Steve is driving his car. He is traveling at 60 feet/second and the speed limit is 40 mph. Is Steve speeding?

Explain the word “momentum.”

Explain the shape of the graph.

What was Sir Isaac Newton famous for?

Is the moon or the sun more important?

Write the first and second Laws of Thermodynamics.

Many people don’t like eating radiation-treated food. How could a food scientist prove that radiation-treated food is safe?

Name an environmental side effect of burning fossil fuels.

Describe what happened during the “big bang.”

Why do some researchers believe that living close to a cell phone tower might cause poor health?

Give the names of two gases that might contribute to global warming.

1.

2.

Hannah sprays her new bike purple. The spraying of the bike gives it a negative charge and the paint a positive one. Why is this?

Positive –

Negative –

Mobile phones are very popular. Give one advantage and one disadvantage of owning a mobile phone.

Advantage

Disadvantage

What does a transformer do?

Give an example of a step-up transformer.

Give a reason why people would want to live near power lines.

Give three ways to reduce heat loss in your home.

1.

2.

3.

When a star’s life cycle is over there is a possibility it will become a black hole.

Describe a “black hole.”

What instrument do you use to measure temperature?

Describe the shape and structure of the Milky Way.

Subject: Math

Change 7/8 to a decimal.

Name a regular triangle.

Find the angles marked with letters.

To change centimeters to meters you __________.

Write two hundred thousand in figures.

What is a six-sided polygon known as?

There are 300 students in the 10th grade.

Mary and Mark want to find out the 10th grade’s favorite color.

Mary asks 30 people.

Mark asks 150 people.

Mark says, “My conclusions are more likely to be reliable than Mary’s.”

Why does Mark think he is right?

A car company is having a sale. A car that was $50,000 before the sale is now 30 percent off. What is the new price?

Name an angle complimentary to BDC

Construct a rectangle with sides Y and ends Z

Expand 2(x + y)

Simplify the following equation.

x is inversely proportional to the square of y.

x=3 and y=4

Express x in terms of y.

What is conditional probability?

What is the splitting formula?

What is a random variable?

What is a discrete random variable?

Give an example with your answer.

You are at a friend’s party. Six cupcakes are distributed among nine plates, and there is no more than one cake per plate. What is the probability of receiving a plate with a cake on it?

What is the symbol for pi?

John and Julie are both good badminton players. Is it more probable that Julie will beat John in four games out of seven or five games out of nine?

How should Julie play to minimize any loss?

Carl Gossell is a machinist. He bought some new machinery for about $125,000. He wants to calculate the value of the machinery over the next 10 years for tax purposes. If the machinery depreciates at the rate of 15% per year, what is the value of the machinery (to the nearest $100) at the end of the 10 years?

A new car costs $32,000. It is expected to depreciate 12% each year for 4 years and then depreciate 8% each year thereafter. Find the value of the car in 6 years.

The population of Bulgaria has been decreasing at an annual rate of 1.3%. If the population of Bulgaria was about 7,797,000 in the year 2000, predict its population in the year 2010.

Subject: Business & Technology

Explain the phrase “free press.”

Explain the word “wholesaler.”

What is a desktop?

What do you use to navigate a desktop?

Paul frequently uses the Internet to research information. Suggest two items of information Paul could locate on the Internet that might help him in running his business.

Item 1:

Item 2:

Suggest three steps Paul is likely to take when selecting the best candidate for a job.

Step one:

Step two:

Step three:

Describe the term “stakeholder.”

Hugo King is an engineer. He is a sole trader.

Explain the business term “sole trader.”

John’s net pay is $150. His deductions are $38.

a) Work out John’s gross pay.

b) State one mandatory deduction from John’s pay.

c) State one voluntary deduction John may or may not pay.

Claire used good body language at a job interview. Can you think of three examples of good body language that Claire may have used?

1.

2.

3.

Claire was well prepared for her interview.

Explain how Claire may have prepared herself for the interview.

Jeff has been asked to collect data about the amount of television his friends watch. Think of an appropriate question he could ask them.

What guarantees might a mortgage company insist on when buying a house?

What is a “partnership’?

What happens during a census?

What is a computer virus?

Joanna works in an office. Her computer is a stand-alone system. What is a stand-alone computer system?

What is hacking?

What is malware?

What is a CD-ROM?

What is a hard disk?

What is a floppy disk?

What is a network?

Subject: Psychology

Describe what is meant by “forgetting.”

Freud stated that the superego contains the moral aspect of one’s personality. Define the term “superego.”

Explain the “psychodynamic approach.”

Suggest a way to abate aggression.

Explain the process of “learning.”

Express the term “stereotype.”

What does the phrase “case study’ mean?

Who said, “I think, therefore I am”?

Using your knowledge of Freud, provide an example of when a dream represents Freud’s theory.

Please fill in the sections of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs below.

Subject: History & Geography

Explain the dispersal of various farming types in the Midwest.

Explain what is meant by the term “pastoral farming.”

Define the phrase “commercial farming.”

Define the phrase “subsistence farming.”

Define the term “intensive farming.”

Explain the meaning of the word “magma.”

What scale do seismologists use to measure the force of earthquakes?

Volcanoes occur on what kind of plate margins?

What happens at the edge of a destructive plate margin?

“Powerful aftershocks rocked the city, fires burned out of control, streets were full of debris and ruined buildings. At least 30 people were injured.” Which type of natural disaster is being described in the report?

Name the area of calm at the center of a storm.

What does the word “lava” mean?

What do we call a person forced to leave their home, perhaps by a natural disaster or war, without having another home to go to?

Explain the word “migration.”

Define the phrase “heavy industry.”

Which artificial waterway runs between the Mediterranean and Red Seas?

What was the main industry in Persia?

The race of people known as Malays come from which country?

Name the smaller rivers that run into the Nile.

Name six animals that live specifically in the Arctic.

Inhabitants of Moscow are called…

Name one of the primary products of the Hawaiian Islands.

What is the collective name given to the inhabitants of the Philippine Islands?

Name one famous Greek landmark.

Name two animals native to Siberia.

Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

How high is Mount Everest?

The Narmada and the Tapi river valleys are said to be old rift valleys. What is a rift valley?

Why was the Berlin Wall built?

Summarize the major events of the Cold War.

What were the consequences of the Cold War?

Who were the Bolsheviks?

Explain the word “autocracy.”

Explain what is meant by the word “dictator.”

Upon ascending the throne the first thing Queen Elizabeth II did was to…

What was the largest threat to world peace in the 1980s?

Summarize the key developments of the Industrial Revolution.

What does the Statue of Liberty represent?

Name two of the classes that existed in medieval England.

Who was Socrates?

Who wrote The Republic and The Apology?

Describe the differences between the February Revolution and the October Revolution.

What is the significance of an altar?

What is having only one spouse called?

What do Christians celebrate at Christmas?

What were Jesus’ closest group of followers known as?

What miracle do Christians celebrate at Easter time?

State two major world religions.

What is the difference between the New Testament and the Old Testament?

What is a pilgrimage?

Name one of the early Romans’ greatest achievements.

Name the successor of the first Roman emperor.

Who was Solomon?

What were the circumstances of Julius Caesar’s death?

Where was Hadrian’s Wall built?

What is Sir Francis Drake known for?

Name the wife of Orpheus, whom he attempted to save from the underworld.

Who was it that helped Theseus escape from the Labyrinth?

Name one of Abraham Lincoln’s greatest achievements.

What did Mahatma Gandhi and Genghis Khan have in common?

What is Karl Marx known for?

Subject: English

Discuss the style of Romeo and Juliet.

How does Romeo’s character develop throughout the play?

How much is Romeo to blame for what happens at the end of Romeo and Juliet?

Use the word “judicious” in a sentence to illustrate its meaning.

Writing Prompt: Imagine you work for a travel agent. Describe a place you have been to and explain why it would interest someone of a similar age.

Why should we be optimistic about the future? Use either a discursive or an argumentative style in composing your answer.

In Pride and Prejudice, at what moment does Elizabeth Bennet realize her true feelings for Mr. Darcy?

Explain the saying: Some people don’t look up until they are flat on their backs.

Use the word “doldrums” in a sentence.

Use the word “congenial” in a sentence.

Suggest an appropriate word for each of these meanings:

a.) An appliance or implement designed to help one do work.

b.) To be on water without sinking

c.) Aggressive; harsh

d.) Faultless or highly skilled

Copyright

F IN EXAMS

First published in the United States in 2011 by Chronicle Books.

First published in the United Kingdom in 2008 by Summersdale Publishers Ltd.

Copyright © 2011 by Summersdale Publishers Ltd.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.

ISBN: 978-1-4521-0746-2

Designed by Michael Morris

Chronicle Books LLC

680 Second Street

San Francisco, California 94107

www.chroniclebooks.com

Table of Contents

Introduction

Chemistry

Biology

Physics

Math

Business & Technology

Psychology

History & Geography

English

Copyright