THE NANNY'S KNICKERS

By: Wren Mingua

Chapter One

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Imagine having the most terrible day of your life. Now imagine the terrible day just got WORSE. That's what I'm going through right now. Trust me, things can really go from bad to worse.

Zoe had surrounded herself in a few of her favorite things: Fuzzy pajama pants. A pint of cookie dough ice cream. A two-liter of Vanilla Coke. A teddy bear, which Kyle had won for her at a carnival two years ago, was tucked under her arm. The bear's beady eyes were staring up at her with synthetic sympathy. One glimpse of those eyes, and she felt like she wanted to cry. Sometimes she swore that teddy bear was her only friend in the world.

She was laying in bed with a spoon hanging out of her mouth, and she was watching the most recent movie version of Pride & Prejudice—the one with Keira Knightley, not Colin Firth. Jane Austen film adaptations were her go-to movies when she needed a pick-me-up. Staring at men in tailcoats and top hats never failed to improve her mood.

“Men were so much nicer then,” she said with a sigh. “And they dressed so much better.” As she recalled the incident at the grocery store, Zoe sneered. She was standing in the check-out line with her ice cream and Coke, and the guy in front of her—probably in his early twenties—was sporting the saggiest saggy pants she had ever seen. At one point, he wrapped an arm around his girlfriend, and his raised arm put two inches of his butt crack on display. It wasn't a pretty sight, that's for sure.

“Do you expect me to rejoice in the inferiority of your circumstances?” Zoe quoted Pride & Prejudice in a pitch-perfect British accent. “Well, that's not very nice of you, Mr. Darcy. Is it?”

Zoe shoved another glob of cookie dough ice cream into her mouth. As she munched on a ball of cookie dough, she heard the front door slam, so she paused her movie.

“Kyle?!” she cried out. “Is that you?”

Of course it was Kyle. Who else could it be? He was the only other person who lived with her!

Kyle popped his head into the bedroom, where he was greeted by the smiling face of his fiance, who was seemingly oblivious to the fact that her hair was terrifically messy. “H-hi,” he stammered.

“Hi.” She raised her pint of ice cream. “Want some?”

“No. No, thanks.” Kyle crept into the room and sat at the end of the bed. He was sitting next to her feet, which were encased in a pair of woolly black socks. There was a large hole in the right sock, which left her big toe completely exposed. “You look comfy.”

“Yeah,” she agreed. “Pretty much.”

Kyle turned his attention to the television, where there was a frozen frame of Keira Knightley's rain-drenched face. “Pride and Prejudice again?”

“Well... yeah.” Zoe shrugged. “It's one of my favorite movies. Want to watch the rest of it with me?”

“Uh... I think you know I'd rather die than watch that movie.”

Zoe stuck out her lower lip. “That's not very nice!”

“It's not my fault if it's boring as hell.”

With a roll of her eyes, Zoe added, “And it's not your fault if the only things that hold your interest are bimbos and guns.”

“Touche.”

Zoe sunk deeper in the bed and pulled the blankets to her chin. She was dreading this moment, but it had to come sooner or later. Preferably sooner. “Uh... Kyle?”

“Hm?”

“There's, uh... there's something I have to tell you.”

Was there any good way to break the bad news? How was she supposed to tell her fiance about losing her job? They were supposed to get married in three weeks, and now she was unemployed. It wasn't as if they needed the extra income, since Kyle had a high-paying job. Nevertheless, it wasn't the most positive note on which to begin their married life.

Zoe clutched her stomach, groaning. Her nerves were making her nauseous. Or maybe she had eaten too much ice cream?

“Are you okay?” Kyle asked.

“Yyyyeah.” Under her breath, she added, “about as good as I can be...”

“Actually, Zoe... there's something I've been meaning to tell you too.” Kyle rose from the bed and stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

Zoe held her breath for a few seconds, relieved to have a reprieve. The longer she could postpone the news, the better. “What is it?”

Kyle started pacing around the room. She could see him fiddling with something on their desk, but she couldn't see what it was, because his back was facing her direction. “I'm...”

“What is it, Kyle?” Zoe repeated, noting his hesitation. “It can't be any worse than what I have to say to you. Trust me.”

“It might be.”

“Really?!” Zoe sat up in bed, and the blankets tumbled off her chest. “You aren't sick or something, are you?”

“No!” Kyle's response was so emphatic, he made himself chuckle. “No, I'm fine.”

“Okay. Good.”

“You know I love you, don't you?”

Zoe grabbed her teddy bear and cuddled it against her lap. The nausea clawing at her stomach was getting worse and worse. “Of course. And... I love you too.”

“Shit... I'm just going to come out and say it!” Kyle ran a hand through his short, dark hair. His silver-gray eyes were red-rimmed and full of grief. “I'm cheating on you.”

Zoe winced. Those words, few as they were, felt like a verbal slap to the face. For a few seconds, her entire body went numb. “Cheating.”

“Yeah.” He ran his hand down the length of his face and snorted into the palm of his hand. “I'm so, so sorry.”

“Wow.” She was blindsided. For some reason, she never thought it could happen to them. They always seemed like a happy, stable, normal couple. Apparently, she was wrong. “With... who?”

“You promise you won't freak out?”

“I... promise.” She was already freaking out! It couldn't get any worse, could it?

“Cynthia.”

“Cynthia?!” Zoe winced again. So Kyle was cheating on her with his ex-girlfriend. It was quite possibly the worst case scenario. Cynthia was the quintessential blonde Barbie doll, and Zoe never felt like she could live up to her. After being with a girl like Cynthia, everything else had to be a step down. Including Zoe.

“I know. God! I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am, Zo!” Kyle ran to the bed and collapsed on top of her. He hugged her legs, clutching them, holding on to her for dear life. “I'm a scumbag.”

Zoe nodded. She couldn't really disagree with him there.

“I'm an asshole.”

She nodded again.

“And I know I don't deserve you.”

“Kyle!” Zoe kicked him off and rolled out of bed. “We were supposed to get married in three weeks. THREE WEEKS!”

“I know!” Kyle's lip quivered as he watched her leave the bed. “God, I know! I guess I was just...”

When he didn't complete his sentence, she asked, “Having second thoughts?”

“No! Not really! Zoe, you're the sweetest, cutest, kindest, most caring and adorable girl in the world!” he professed. “No one could ever have second thoughts about a girl like you. I just... I panicked, okay?!”

“Great. That makes me feel better,” Zoe said with a roll of her eyes. “Are you still seeing her?”

“What?”

“Cynthia. Are you with her... currently?”

“No!” Kyle crawled to the end of the bed and tried to grab Zoe's arm, but she pulled away. “I mean... okay... kind of. Cynthia thinks we're together, but we're not.”

“You're not?” Zoe grabbed an empty, oversized purse from the corner of the room and tossed it on the bed.

“No... I'm going to break up with her!” Kyle exclaimed. “I want to be with YOU, Zoe. I wouldn't even be telling you this if you weren't the one I wanted. I just didn't want to get married when I had this on my conscience. You deserved to know. Cynthia is... she's great, but she's not you.”

“Oh, I'm sure she's great!” Zoe swung open the closet door and started plucking shirts from hangers. “If you like her so much, why don't you go to her?”

“Aren't you listening? I want YOU!”

Zoe shoved a few shirts into the purse. She just needed a few essentials—the rest could wait. She packed a couple pairs of pants, a skirt. Then she reached for her underwear drawer.

“What are you doing?” Kyle asked.

“What does it look like I'm doing?” Zoe plucked a bra from the drawer and dangled it over the purse for a few seconds. “I'm leaving.”

When Zoe dropped the bra, Kyle snatched it in midair. “Wait. No. You can't!”

“Yes. I can.” Kyle could have her bra—she had others. She packed the purse with bras and panties until it was practically bursting.

“Please, Zoe!” Kyle got to his knees and held his palms together in a prayer-like position. “Please. Please! Just give me a second chance!”

Zoe slung her purse over her shoulder. “Nope.”

“But why!?” Zoe left the room, so Kyle leapt from the bed and stayed on her heels. “Why? Can't you appreciate the fact that I wanted to be honest with you? I didn't want to start our marriage with a lie!”

“Kyle... I just...” When she got to the front door, Zoe turned around and shook her head at him. “I have zero tolerance for this kind of thing. My father cheated on my mother when I was six years old... and he never came back.”

Kyle had heard the story before—plenty of times. “I know. I'm sorry.”

“He left us. Both of us. And I never saw him again.” Zoe shook her head as she glowered at him. “I won't risk getting abandoned again.”

“So you're going to abandon ME?”

When she saw the tears in his eyes, Zoe almost regretted her decision. Maybe she wasn't thinking things through. Maybe he was truly remorseful? If she gave him a second chance, maybe he wouldn't do it again?

“No,” she said aloud, winning the battle with her conscience.

“No what?”

“No, I'm not staying.”

“Nooooooooooo, please!” Kyle ran forward, seizing her by the arm. “Please. Please don't leave me. Give me a chance!”

Zoe held up her hand and pointed at her diamond engagement ring. “Do you want your ring back?”

“I'll get you to change your mind!” Kyle declared. “I will! I'll do whatever it takes!”

“You're welcome to try,” she said with a sigh. “Now... do you want your ring back?”

“No. You keep it. I want you to have it.” Kyle lowered his eyes to the ground. “And you'll have my heart too... wherever you go.”

“I'm going to my mom's,” she announced. “I'll talk to you later.”

“Pleeeease!” he whimpered.

Kyle was a six foot tall, broad-shouldered, impossibly handsome semi-genius. Whining didn't suit him.

“I'll... I'll be in touch, okay?” Zoe said. She pulled open the front door and stepped through the doorway. The further she went, the more he pouted. “Take care of yourself, Kyle.”

“I love you, Zoe!” he screamed. “I love you!”

When she closed the door, Kyle sank to his knees, clutched his face, and bellowed into the palms of his hands.

She was gone.

But at least she left him with some hope. “I'll be in touch” certainly sounded more promising than, “I hope I never see you again.” He half-expected her to say the latter, but she had been surprisingly placid.

“I love her...” Kyle whispered to himself. He eyed the door, wishing she would return. “And I'll never give up.”

Chapter Two

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

I feel the familiar pinch of diarrhea in my lower abdomen. Just the thought of meeting my mom for lunch is making me sick.

“Hiiii, sweetheart!” Beverly cried. She raised her purse, saluting her daughter from the other end of the restaurant. Her mother's obnoxiousness made Zoe want to slink beneath the table in shame.

Beverly came bounding over, her red curls bouncing on her shoulders. At fifty-five, she was still a very attractive woman, and they were often mistaken for sisters. But Zoe wasn't nearly as glamorous as her mother, in her Chanel skirt and Prada bag. In comparison, Zoe was--

“Frumpy!” her mother exclaimed.

“Huh?”

“You're looking a bit frumpy, honey,” Beverly said. “That sweater looks terrible. Is that Kyle's shirt?”

“No.”

“Well, it's way too big for you. Have you lost some weight? It looks like you've lost some weight in your cheeks. Oh! I should tell you about this new diet I'm on. It lets you eat cheesecake... CHEESECAKE! Doesn't that sound delicious?”

“Uh-huh.”

Beverly cracked open the menu and peered inside. “But I can't eat much right now... I'm saving my calories for dinner. You don't mind if I have a light lunch, do you? Ooo, the minestrone sounds good. And maybe some broccoli spears.”

“You can eat whatever you want,” her daughter said. And Zoe was going to eat whatever she wanted to eat. Maybe a big, juicy hamburger and a boatload of french fries.

“Did you know it was raining outside? I'm lucky I had my umbrella... it would have messed up my hair! Does it look alright?” Beverly patted the bouncy ends of her hair.

“You look great, Mom. As you always do.”

“Aww, you're so sweet. I spent some extra time on my hair because I'm meeting a neighbor for coffee later on. Have you met Roger?”

“Roger? Who?”

“He's my neighbor...and a handsome man, too. He doesn't look his age. I would swear he looks about forty-five!”

“How old is he?”

“Sixty-two.” Beverly reached across the table, seizing Zoe's hand. “And I swear to you, he has barely any gray. Maybe a bit of silver around the temples, but that's about it.”

“So... it's like a date?”

“Mmm, you could say that.” Beverly's thin, rouge lips curled into a smile. “What about you, dear? How are you and Kyle?”

Zoe lifted her menu, hiding her face from her mother's scrutinizing eyes. It had been two days since their break-up and she had yet to tell a soul. She didn't want anyone asking questions about her personal life. “Well... you see, Mom, that's why I wanted to talk to you. I have a lot to tell you.”

“Oh my god. You're not PREGNANT or anything, are you?!” her mother gasped. “It wouldn't be too terrible, though, since you're getting married soon. You wouldn't be too far along. I doubt anyone would be able to tell.”

“Mom!” Zoe had to shout to get her attention. “I'm not pregnant, okay? Geez.”

“Good!” Beverly gave her daughter a pat on the arm. “That's not to say I wouldn't want you to get pregnant. You know that, right? It's just... call me old-fashioned, but I think there's a proper order to these things. Marriage first, then you can think about the babies.”

Tinkle tinkle.

When Beverly heard the jingling noise, she took out her cell phone and checked her text messages. Then she started texting right then and there, completely oblivious to the fact that her daughter needed to speak with her. The waitress came to take their order, and Beverly had her eyes fixed on the phone the entire time.

After several minutes, she returned her phone to her purse. “That was Roger. The other day, I had to teach him how to text. He's not very tech savvy.”

“You're not very tech savvy,” Zoe countered.

“Well... no. But I'm learning.” Beverly leaned forward and folded her hands on the table. “Now, you had something to tell me?”

The waitress returned with their drinks, so Zoe took a few seconds to prepare her iced tea for consumption. She opened a sugar packet and--

“Oh my god, SUGAR?!” Beverly gasped, as if she had uttered the world's dirtiest word.

Zoe dumped three packets of sugar into her iced tea. “Yeah. Why not?”

“Because, honey, you should use SPLENDA!” Beverly picked up a yellow Splenda packet and wiggled it in her daughter's face. “Pure sugar is terrible for you, and Splenda tastes just the same.”

“Well, I like the real deal,” Zoe said. “Anyway, Mom... I really, really need to talk to you about something, so stop trying to distract me.”

“I'm not trying to distract you!” Beverly's lower lip protruded innocently. “What did you need to tell me?”

“Kyle and I broke up,” Zoe blurted. She figured it would be best to get it over quickly, like ripping off a band-aid. “We're calling off the wedding.”

“WHAAAAT?!”

“Shhh! Mom!”

“You broke up?!”

“Yes!” Her mother was shrieking so loudly, Zoe was tempted to lean across the table and clap a hand over her mouth. “But it's not that big of a deal. We--”

“Not that big of a deal? NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL?!” Beverly repeated, aghast. “Of course it's a big deal! All of our friends and family were expecting to come to a wedding! If you call it off, what are they going to think?”

“I don't know, Mom. Maybe they'll think Kyle was a cheating asshole?”

Beverly drew a sharp breath. “He cheated?! Really?!”

“Yes! Please keep your voice down!” Zoe started massaging the worry line between her eyes. Her mother was going to give her some new wrinkles.

“But you're thirty-two years old.”

“And?”

“And you haven't been married yet!”

Zoe leaned back and crossed her arms. “And... what's your point? You think I should marry a cheater?”

“Well... no.” Her mother pursed her lips. “But I really liked Kyle.”

“I really liked him too.”

“How many times did he cheat? Is it really so bad? Maybe you can forgive him?”

“Mom!” Zoe crossed her arms. Out of all the people she knew, her mother was the last one she expected to side with her cheating boyfriend. After all, her mother had a history with cheaters. All of a sudden, Zoe felt like she was sitting across from a traitor. She shoved her straw into her mouth and sucked down her iced tea so fast, she gave herself brain freeze. “I thought you'd feel sorry for me. I didn't think you'd be on Kyle's side.”

“I'm not on Kyle's side, honey,” her mother protested. “I just... I'm just...”

“You're what?”

“Disappointed,” her mother finished with a sigh. “I just want you to be happy.”

“I am happy,” Zoe insisted. “I don't need a man to be happy.” And it was true. Before meeting Kyle, Zoe had been single for three years, and she swore those were the happiest years of her life. Since most of her relationships had ended in grief, it hardly seemed worth it.

“Well... try not to be too cynical, dear. I don't want you to end up like me. Fifty-five. Unmarried. Alone...”

“But you're not alone,” Zoe said. With a wink, she added, “You have Roger.”

Beverly rolled her eyes. “I don't have Roger. Not yet, anyway..."

“Anyway, Mom, there was some other stuff I needed to tell you. For instance...” Before dropping the bomb, Zoe winced, “I got laid off from work.”

“Oh my. Please tell me you're joking.”

“Nope.” Zoe shook her head. “They let go of five teachers... including one kindergarten teacher. Me.”

“Awww, but you were so good with those kids!”

Zoe shrugged.

“No wedding. No job.” Beverly frowned as she recapped her daughter's unfortunate situation. “What are you going to do now?”

“Well... there was something else I needed to tell you.”

Beverly clutched her chest. “SOMETHING ELSE? You're going to make me pass out with all this bad news!”

“Well, it's a good thing you're sitting down,” Zoe said with a chuckle. “Before Kyle and I broke up, we were planning to go to the UK.”

“I thought your honeymoon was going to be in Bora Bora?”

“Not a honeymoon,” Zoe corrected her. “We were thinking about moving to the UK. We had visas and everything.”

“Ohhh no... don't tell me--”

“I'm going to live in England for awhile,” Zoe said, confirming her mother's fears. “And hopefully I'll be able to find a job.”

Chapter Three

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

You know how they call it “jolly old England?” Well, it's not really that jolly. I'm not saying the people are rude, but they glare at me as soon as I open my mouth. I don't think being a "yank" is a good thing.

When she looked out the cab's window, she was greeted by the sight of a giant clock. Big Ben. Her cab was stalled in traffic right outside the Houses of Parliament, which meant she had a perfect opportunity to do some sightseeing. On the other side of the street was Westminster Abbey, encased in a halo of morning sun. It was an impressive sight, but she was even more impressed by the hustle and bustle of tourists that cluttered the sidewalks.

It was a busy day in London.

“Izzit your first time in London?” asked the cockney cab driver.

“Yeah.”

“Aye. I thought as much.” He started at her in the rear view mirror. “You have the look of a first timer.”

Zoe had to wonder what a “first timer” looked like. Did she not look like a Londoner? Could they spot an American from a million miles away? Would she stand out like a sore thumb everywhere she went? His comment was innocent enough, but it had her feeling paranoid.

Several minutes later, they arrived at her hotel. She took out some colorful bank notes and gave the driver a generous tip. She checked into the hotel and crashed on her bed. She was exhausted, utterly and thoroughly. An eight hour ride on a plane wasn't exactly her idea of a good time.

It didn't take long for loneliness to set in. She was alone in another country—her friends and family were on the other side of an ocean! She didn't know anyone. If she had a problem, there wasn't a single soul she could turn to. She felt like she was starting from scratch.

She got out her laptop, checked her social networks, and emailed a few of her friends, including her mother. It made her feel a little bit better. Just a bit.

Then she felt obligated to do some sightseeing, so she rolled out of bed and forced herself to shake off the jet lag. She got on a red double decker bus, which took her to all of London's most famous sights. Trafalgar Square. The Tower of London. The London Eye. She wished she had a camera, since she would have loved to take some pictures. Unfortunately, she left her camera—and many other nonessential items—at Kyle's house.

“My camera phone!” she shouted, her sudden exclamation earning her a dubious glance from an old biddy. She took out her phone and took a few blurry pictures of St. Paul's Cathedral, a domed church that looked a bit similar to the U.S. Capitol Building. At least, that's what Zoe thought.

Then her thoughts wandered to Kyle, as they often did. What was he doing at that moment? Did he miss her? Would he go crawling back to Cynthia? Stop thinking about him, she silently chided herself. The less she thought about him, the less she missed him. And she certainly didn't want to miss him.

The sightseeing bus ended its voyage near her hotel, and she headed back. Her time as a tourist, short as it was, was at an end. This wasn't a leisure trip.

She needed to find employment, and she already had something in mind.

* * *

When she arrived at her destination in Oxfordshire, she thought about turning around and heading back to the hotel. It was a mansion, complete with a fountain, trimmed hedges, and a resplendent garden. It looked like the sort of mansion in which a British lord would reside, like Pemberley in her beloved Pride & Prejudice. There was no way they would hire her.

And yet, wasn't she just as qualified as anyone? She didn't travel two hours from London just to tuck her tail between her legs and flee. She owed it to herself to give it a shot.

When she knocked on the front door, she half-expected to be greeted by a butler. However, it was the lady of the house who answered the door, and she regarded Zoe as if she was a carrier of the plague. The woman looked like she was around Zoe's age, perhaps a few years older. She had short, dyed, cherry red hair, tight lips, and a beak-like nose.

“Uh... hi.” When the woman didn't say anything, Zoe spoke up. “I'm here about the nanny job.”

“Oh. Right.” The woman turned her head and shouted over her shoulder. “LEWIS, THERE'S ANOTHER NANNY HERE!”

“I hope I didn't come at a bad time,” Zoe said, as politely as possible. Every time she opened her mouth, she felt like she was representing all Americans, which made her even more determined to make a good impression. “The paper didn't say anything about a specific time of arrival, so--”

“It's fine,” the woman said, stepping out of the doorway. “Come in.”

“I'm Zoe.”

“Alright.” Was it Zoe's imagination, or had the woman rolled her eyes?

“What's your name?”

“Gemma.”

“Gemma,” Zoe repeated. “That's a pretty name.”

“I hate it.”

“Oh. Well... okay.” How was she supposed to reply to something like that?

When Zoe stepped into the lavish foyer, butterflies sprang to life in her stomach. The marble floor was so shiny, it looked like she was stepping on glass. A chandelier, dripping with diamonds, sparkled on the ceiling. There was an enormous portrait on the wall of a dapper man with bushy brown mutton chops. Zoe couldn't picture herself working in a place like this. It was beyond anything she had imagined.

“So, Zoe. When did you--”

Before Gemma could finish asking her question, a man entered the foyer. He was impossibly tall, with light brown hair, deep-set eyes, and a strong jaw. As soon as he laid eyes on Zoe, he smirked. “You must be the new nanny candidate?”

“Yep. That's me.” Yep?! Did she really just say yep? She wanted to sound professional, not like a high school girl. “I'm Zoe.”

She held out her hand, and he gave it a firm shake. “An American,” he noted. “That's interesting.”

“Or I could be a Canadian.”

The man raised an eyebrow. “Are you a Canadian?”

“No.”

“Then I was correct.” The man's gaze was unwavering. He had a grin on his lips, slightly amused and slightly wicked. “My name is Lewis, by the way. Lewis Eastham.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“And I take it you've already met my wife.” With a snort, he added, “my lovely wife.”

Gemma shot her husband a look that could kill. “Trust me, he doesn't think I'm lovely.”

“Of course you're lovely, darling.” Lewis tried to lean in for a kiss, but Gemma dodged it. “Isn't she a sweetheart?”

“Are you talking about me... or Zoe?”

“You, Gemma, you.” Lewis leaned toward Zoe and whispered in her ear, “Although, I'm sure you'll soon find out she's not sweet at all. Not in the least.”

Zoe was tongue-tied. She had been standing in the foyer for all of two minutes, and she was already feeling uncomfortable. “So, uh...” She gave the back of her neck a nervous scratch. “Is there going to be an interview?”

“Ah. Yes. Of course.” Lewis nodded. “Why don't you follow me into the sitting room? Gemma, you can come too...if you'd like to. Of course, you don't have to...”

“Oh, I'm sure you'd LOVE it if I didn't come!” Gemma snarled at him. “Do I need to remind you that this is OUR decision, not just yours?”

“Follow me,” Lewis said, ignoring his wife's complaint. He motioned for Zoe to follow—which she did, albeit a bit reluctantly. When they arrived at their destination, he held open the door for her. An interior designer obviously had a hand in decorating the sitting room, which smelled like leather and cigarettes.

“Sit,” he ordered. So she sat. Lewis turned to his wife and said, “why don't you offer her some refreshments? Like a proper hostess?”

“And why don't you focus on your questions... like a proper employer?” Gemma countered. “I'm not your maid, Lewis.”

The smirk never left his face, and Zoe got the impression that bantering with his wife was something he relished in. “Alright, Chloe...”

“Zoe,” she politely corrected him.

“Zoe,” he amended. “You think you would be a good nanny for our son?”

“I do! I love children... even though I don't have any of my own.”

“You might love children now, but you haven't met our son,” Lewis remarked. “I'm sure he'll change your mind.”

Zoe took a deep breath. The boy's parents had her feeling so unnerved, she was tempted to get up and leave. But she needed this job. Badly. “Uh... until last week, I was a kindergarten teacher, so I have experience in dealing with children. I have experience in planning activities, teaching, and--”

“You don't need to teach him anything,” Gemma interrupted. “He's a very smart boy, practically a genius for his age. And he goes to one of the best schools in the country.”

“O-of course,” Zoe said, a bit taken aback. “And how old is he?”

“Eight.”

“Great.” Zoe smiled, hoping to warm Gemma's cool disposition with a friendly gesture. Her bright red hair didn't seem to match her personality. So far, Gemma had proven herself to be completely and utterly humorless.

“How long have you been in England?” Lewis asked.

“Just a few days.”

“And do you like it here?”

“Oh yes! I do! It's a beautiful country!”

“If you don't mind me asking, why did you decide to move to Britain?”

“Ahem!” his wife interrupted again. “I don't see how these questions have any relevance whatsoever! Why don't you ask something that actually pertains to being a nanny?”

“Gemmaaaa,” Lewis moaned. “Why don't you hush up and let me conduct my interview in peace?”

“But you're asking questions that have nothing to do with her experience with children! How is that relevant?”

“Would you like to conduct this interview? You think you could do a better job than me?” Gemma didn't reply. She just crossed her arms and sneered at him.

“At any rate...” Lewis continued. Despite his wife's complaints, he ventured into inappropriate territory once again. “Are you married, Zoe?”

“Uh... no.”

“And why not? An attractive young woman like you--”

“LEWIS!” Gemma screamed.

Lewis' eyes danced with amusement. It was almost as if he enjoyed being railed at. “And Zoe... you do realize you would be a live-in nanny, yes?” He waited for Zoe's nod, then he added, “and that means Gemma would have access to you twenty-four hours a day, which is liable to drive you mad.”

Zoe started to reply, but she clapped her mouth shut. No matter what she said, she knew she would end up offending one of them. She felt like she was caught in the middle of a battle between a warring husband and wife.

“Well then, Zoe... if you don't mind, my wife and I need a moment to deliberate. If you would step outside...?”

Zoe raised an eyebrow. That was it?! She didn't know if the lack of questions was a good sign or a bad sign.

“Is that it?!” Gemma shrieked, echoing Zoe's thoughts. “How can you base your decision on so little information?! It's preposterous!”

“I know all I need to know, Gemma. The rest would be a waste of time.”

Zoe got up. “I'll... wait in the hallway.” She grabbed her purse and left the room as quickly as possible. Little did she know, Lewis' eyes were fastened on her rear end as she fled. He studied the sway of her hips, and it gave him secret pleasure.

As soon as she was out the door, Zoe felt the tension drain from her shoulders, like air from a balloon. She couldn't remember the last time she had been more tense, or been more uncomfortable. It was the shortest interview in the world, but she was glad it was over.

The husband and wife continued their verbal sparring match; Zoe could hear them through the door. She pressed her ear against the wood and held her breath.

“I like her,” Lewis said.

“Well, OF COURSE you like her. That much is obvious,” Gemma snarled at him. “And predictable.”

“And of course you wouldn't like her, seeing as you're jealous of anyone with a pair of breasts,” Lewis countered.

Gemma inhaled sharply. “How dare you say that to me!?”

There was a moment of silence. Either that, or Zoe couldn't hear what was being said.

“I'll not have that... that American watching over my son!” Gemma barked. “She looks like a hussy!”

Zoe looked down the length of her body, wondering how in the world she could be perceived as a hussy. Her hair was swept into a loose ponytail, and she was wearing her favorite cardigan—a fuzzy yellow cardigan buttoned all the way to her chin.

Did she need the job badly enough to endure this sort of baseless criticism? If she got the job, would the wife keep hating her for no reason whatsoever?

“But I can't go back home,” Zoe whispered to herself. “Everyone will think I failed...”

And Zoe was terrified of failure. It was bad enough that her wedding was a failure. If—and it was a big IF—Lewis wanted to hire her, could she stomach being the nanny long enough to find employment elsewhere? She didn't want her British excursion to end up being a waste of money. Now that she was unemployed, it wasn't as if she had money to waste.

“It isn't your decision to make. I'll hire whomever I'd like.”

“How is it NOT my decision? I'm his mother!”

All of a sudden, a voice behind her asked, “Enjoying the show?”

Zoe spun around and clasped a hand over her heart. There was a young man standing behind her. He was even taller than Lewis, so she had to crane her neck to see his face.

“Uh... h-hi,” she sputtered.

“Hello,” he greeted her. “You were eavesdropping, I take it?”

He looked adorable, with soft blonde hair, chiseled cheekbones, and puffy pink lips. The wavy ends of his hair curled across his forehead, as if each strand had been meticulously placed. As angelic as he was, it was easy to imagine a pair of ivory wings emerging from his back. He was insanely cute, but much too young for Zoe.

“I-I wasn't eavesdropping!” she disagreed.

“Suctioned against the wall... ear pressed to the door,” the young man chuckled. “It certainly looked like you were eavesdropping to me!”

“Well... I wasn't!”

“Then what were you doing? Checking for termites?” His blonde eyebrows leapt to his forehead in amusement. “Don't worry. I won't tell anyone. Your secret is safe with me.”

“What secret?!” Zoe exclaimed. Without another word, the nosy blonde Brit turned around and started walking down the hall. Except he wasn't walking—he was strutting. In all her life, she had never seen such a cocky swagger. “Hey, wait!”

He turned around and winked at her.

Then he was gone. She was left wondering who he was. Did he work for the Easthams? The gardener, perhaps? For some reason, she couldn't picture his delicate face hunched over the ground as he toiled in the earth.

A few minutes later, the door opened, and Lewis popped out in the hallway. “Never mind my wife. Her verbal reprimands are a daily occurrence.”

“She... seemed nice.”

Her lie was so blatant, Lewis had to laugh. “Anyway, I've decided to give you the job.”

A voice in the back of Zoe's head whispered oh no. She was afraid of that! “Um... wow. Thanks.”

“We had two other candidates awhile back, but they were old... too old, too severe. You know the type. They would stifle the life out of you. I don't think Chris would be too happy.”

“Chris?”

“My son,” Lewis said. “Clearly.”

Clearly. Was she wrong to think that word was a bit snarky? “Well... I look forward to meeting him.”

“Does that mean you accept the job?”

Did she?! Zoe could think of a million reasons why she shouldn't accept the job. The number one reason stepped out in the hallway and hovered behind her husband, sneering. Gemma's sneer was practically permanent.

“I...” Zoe hesitated, but only for a moment. “I would be honored.”

“Excellent.” Lewis looked back at Gemma and smiled over his shoulder, as if to gloat. “When can you start?”

Chapter Four

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

For some reason, time moves slowly in the UK. I've only been here a week, but it feels like I've been here a year. Either I've wandered into a time warp, or my loneliness is making the days feel long.

She arrived with her luggage two days later. Lewis, who was looking a bit more disheveled than before, greeted her at the door. He was wearing an untucked suit coat, and his hair was in desperate need of a comb.

“Let me take that for you,” he said, snatching her luggage from her hands.

“Oh, you don't have--”

“I insist.” He wheeled her luggage into the foyer and motioned for her to follow. “Come. I'll show you to your room. Oh... and you'll be happy to know, Gemma will be absent until the evening.”

Zoe almost opened her mouth to say oh, it wouldn't make me happy, but she actually didn't mind Gemma's absence. If Gemma really thought she was a hussy, it would be best to keep her distance.

“Here is your room,” Lewis announced, pulling open the door to a spacious bedroom. There was a wide desk, a four-poster bed, a 40” television, and a wardrobe that looked like it was straight out of Narnia. “Is it to your liking?”

“Of course!”

“Great.” Lewis deposited her luggage in the middle of the room. “If there is anything else you need, don't hesitate to ask. As this will be your home, I want you to be as comfortable as possible.”

“I can't think of anything else I'd need. It's really nice, thanks.”

Lewis picked a piece of lint from Zoe's cardigan and flicked it on the floor. She thought it was a bit invasive, but she didn't say anything.

“Alright! Do you have any questions?”

“None that I can think of at the moment.”

“Good, good.” Lewis' gaze was fixed on her chest. Either he was transfixed by her breasts, or he was looking for more lint to pluck. “Oh! Before I forget, why don't I go over a list of duties you'll be expected to perform.”

She nodded. “Okay.”

“You'll be expected to plan Chris' daily activities. And you'll be in charge of his discipline from now on,” Lewis leaned closer and lowered his voice, as if fearful of being overheard. “Lately, he has a tendency to be a bit lippy. I'm not asking you to beat the boy, but if you can somehow put him in his place, I would be in your debt.”

“What do you recommend?”

“You're the nanny, yes? Discipline him as you see fit. You look like a sensible girl, and I trust you will make good decisions. Also... we get takeaway quite often. However, when we don't get takeaway, you'll be expected to prepare his meals. Will that be a problem?”

“Uh... no.”

“You have some experience with cooking, I hope?”

“Some.”

“Good. Great. I'll have to teach you how to use the hob, as it can be a bit finnicky.”

Zoe didn't think it was a good time to tell him she had no idea what a “hob” was.

“In addition,” Lewis went on. “You'll be expected to pick him up from school. I go to work early in the morning, so I should be able to drop him off every now and then. The school term has yet to begin... I'll keep you updated on that.” Lewis held open her bedroom door and motioned for her to step into the hallway, which she did. “One more thing...”

“What's that?”

“I know Gemma said Chris is a genius... and it might be true, however...” Lewis' voice trailed off, and he had a far-off look in his eye. “Some of my favorite memories as a child was story time with my Nan. So... if you could take the time to read a book to him every now and then, I think that would be lovely.”

“Okay.” She wondered if she should give him more than a one word response, but for some reason, he made her a bit uneasy. She hoped the feeling of dread in the pit of her stomach would ebb as time went on.

“As far as your tasks go, I think that's everything...” Lewis took her by the arm and led her down the hallway. “Now, I need to make introductions. You've already met Gemma, of course... and I'm sure that encounter left something to be desired. Now I'm going to introduce you to my brother, Benjamin.”

“Does your brother live here?”

Lewis stopped in front of a random door and raised a fist. His hand hovered a moment, as if he was reluctant, then he finally knocked. “For the time being, yes. Benjamin recently graduated from Oxford. He'll be staying here until he finds a place of his own. If he disrupts your peace and quiet, I apologize in advance.”

When the door opened, Zoe could feel her throat constricting. The beautiful blonde boy, the one who caught her eavesdropping, was standing on the other side of the door. As soon as he laid eyes on her, he grinned.

“Was someone talking about me?” asked the blonde. “I thought I heard someone say my name.”

“Benjamin, this is Zoe... the new live-in nanny.” Lewis turned his attention back to Zoe. “And this is my brother, Benjamin. Obviously.”

“Believe it or not, we've already met.” Benjamin winked at her. “Zoe and I had a titillating encounter a few days ago.”

“Is that so?” Lewis asked. “How is that even possible?”

“I ran into her in the hall when she came for her interview,” Benjamin said. “I hope she hasn't forgotten me.”

“Of course not. I remember you.” His wasn't a face that could be easily forgotten, and he knew it.

Benjamin leaned against the door frame, smirking. “Sooo... an American nanny, hmm? Is this some sort of new age, role reversal Mary Poppins?”

“It looks like you've got me figured out,” Zoe joked. “You must have seen me whizzing by your window on my flying umbrella.”

“Oh, was that you?” Benjamin quipped. “I thought it was the gardener.”

“Nope. That was definitely me.”

“You'll have to give me a ride on your brolly sometime, Mary Poppins.” Benjamin raked his gaze up the entire length of her body.

“Nuh uh. Only I get to ride.”

“Ahem.” Lewis cleared his throat so loudly, they had no choice but to turn their attention back to him. “It's nice that you're getting along so well, but Zoe and I should get going. She hasn't met Chris yet, so--”

“Aww. Leaving so soon? That's a shame.” Was it her imagination, or did Benjamin lick his lips? “The little nanny is the most interesting thing to come around in a long, long time.”

“Trust me, I'm not that interesting,” Zoe corrected him. “Anyway, I'm wondering... is it always Benjamin; do you ever just go by Ben?"

“On occasion. Do you ever just go by... Z?”

Zoe laughed. “Actually, I had a friend who used to call me that. And sometimes people will call me Zo without the e... which is kind of annoying.”

“Then I'll have to call you Zo,” Benjamin said, “Girls like it when a man is vexing. It gets under their skin... turns them on. It's a proven fact.”

“AHEM!” Lewis cleared his throat again, a bit irritated at how easily they conversed. Her repartee with Benjamin was a far cry from the one word answers she fired off at Lewis. “We should get going, Ben.”

“Your brother calls you Ben.”

“True. And sometimes I like to call him loo.”

“Come on!” Lewis insisted. He took her by the arm and proceeded to drag her away from Benjamin, who kept her in his sights as long as he could. He led her up the stairs to the second story of the mansion. “See what I mean? Ben can be quite a nuisance. He never takes anything seriously... including his life.”

“Didn't you say he graduated from Oxford?”

“True. But he hasn't even tried to find a job, and he's been here for three months now. Anyway...” Lewis stopped talking because they had arrived at their destination. There was a Harry Potter poster on the door. Beneath it, a big red sign warned: KEEP OUT. “Don't let the signs fool you. He's really not a terrible lad.” A few seconds later, Lewis amended, “Oh, who am I kidding? He's a true terror. I didn't think children were supposed to succumb to angst until they were in their teens. He's only eight... eight... and he gives me such a hard time. Hopefully he'll be gentle with you.”

Lewis was filling her head with so much information, it was impossible to soak it all in.

The door swung open, and a pudgy, sandy-haired boy stuck his head out. “What?” he asked curtly.

“Hello, Chris. This is the new nanny, Miss Zoe Manet. Manet... like the painter.” He looked over at her and smiled.

Of course, his son had no idea what he was talking about. “So?”

“Treat her with respect. Understand?”

Chris shrugged. He tugged on his shirt—a graphic tee with a skull on it.

“Listen to her. Do whatever she tells you to do, as if she was your own parent.”

Chris stuck his hands into his pockets and shrugged again. “Whatever.”

“Alright then...” Lewis looked over at Zoe and raised an eyebrow. “Any more questions?”

“No. I think I'm alright.”

“Great! Good! Then... I'll give you two a moment to get acquainted.”

Before Zoe had a chance to protest, Lewis was already making a dash for the stairs. As she stared at the little boy in front of her, she forced a smile. She could barely see his eyes, as he was peering at her through overlong bangs. The boy needed a haircut. Zoe wondered if that would be one of the nanny's jobs as well. She certainly hoped not. The last time she attempted to cut Kyle's hair, it was a bowl cut disaster.

“So, Chris... it's really great to meet you,” she said. “I like your shirt.”

“No you don't.”

Zoe was taken aback. “I... don't?”

“No. Don't say things when you don't mean them. I hate people who do that.” He pulled something out of his pocket and started fidgeting with it. It took Zoe a few seconds to figure out what he was holding. It was a green toy soldier, the small plastic kind. “And let's get something else straight.”

She was almost afraid to ask. “And... what's that?”

“I don't like you. I don't have to like you. And that's that.”

Then he slammed the door in her face.

Zoe stood on the other side of the door, feeling like she had just been punched in the gut. Between the boy and his mother, she had every reason to feel unwelcome. She had every reason to feel out of place—and the fact that she was an American was just the tip of the iceberg.

She wanted to go home.

Chapter Five

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

How do you know you've gotten old? When you look over at a 22-year-old and you think he's a kid.

“Gemma's returned... heaven forbid...and she's insisting we go out for dinner tonight.”

Lewis was standing uncomfortably close as he delivered this information, and Zoe wondered if it was a European thing. Either that, or he enjoyed breathing down her neck.

“That means you'll be alone with Ben and Chris. Is that going to be a problem?”

And it was no exaggeration—she could literally feel his breath on her neck. “No. I can't see why it would be.”

“But I know it's your first night here... I wouldn't want to put you in a situation that has you feeling uncomfortable.”

The fact that his face was only two inches away from hers had her feeling pretty uncomfortable, but she had to grin and bear it. She didn't want to do or say anything to upset her new employer. “I'm not uncomfortable.”

“You can call me on my mobile any time.” He held out a slip of paper. “Here's my number. Don't hesitate to call me... for anything.”

“Okay.”

“Oh, and you'll be responsible for making Chris' dinner tonight. You're welcome to use anything you find in the kitchen. I know that's a lot to throw on you all at once, so if you don't think you can handle it--”

“I think I can handle it,” she said with a smile.

“Good. Right. Excellent!” He clapped his hands together in feigned excitement. “Is there anything else you need to know?”

“When will you be back?”

“It will be several hours, unfortunately. She's forcing me to go to some infernal musical... and if you haven't noticed, those things can drag on forever.” Lewis groaned so loudly, Zoe's eyes widened. “But I would assume we'll be back before midnight.”

Zoe nodded. “Okay.”

“OH! And one more thing! You'll be cooking for Ben too. I don't even think the poor boy can cook toast, so if it isn't any trouble...”

“It's fine. I can cook for him too.”

“Great. Lovely!” Lewis exclaimed. His excessive exclamations were starting to grate on her nerves. “Well... I guess we'll be leaving then.” He leaned closer to her, even closer than before. “You look lovely, by the way.”

Warmth flooded her cheeks. Did he really just say that to her? It wasn't just borderline inappropriate, it crossed the threshold! “Have a good time, Mr. Eastham.”

“Oh please. Call me Lewis!” he insisted. “Well... goodnight, then.”

“Goodnight.”

When Lewis finally stepped away from her, Zoe breathed a sigh of relief. She liked her personal space, and Lewis pretty much spared her none. She closed and locked her door, then crashed on her bed. She grabbed a bag of Walker's “crisps” and started munching on them. She really wasn't the best cook in the world, and now she had to cook meals? When she accepted the job as a nanny, she hadn't considered that cooking could be one of her responsibilities.

“I can't stay here...” she whispered to herself. “No way.”

Gemma hated her, Lewis was strangely predatory, and Chris was going to be a pain in her neck. It just wasn't going to be worth it.

Zoe thought she could hear commotion outside, so she ran to the window and peered out. Gemma was chasing after Lewis, screaming at him. She smacked him in the head with her purse, and Lewis dove into his car, which happened to be a polished black Porsche. To say there was tension between the couple would have been an understatement. Either they were heading for divorce, or they would spend the rest of their lives making each other miserable.

Zoe finished her crisps, then headed to the kitchen to see what she could rustle up. Fortunately, there were some frozen pizzas in the freezer. She didn't know what Chris liked to eat, but every kid liked pizza—right? The brand was “Chicago Town,” which Zoe thought was hilarious. Deep dish Chicago pizzas in the UK. Now she had seen it all!

She followed the instructions and put two pizzas in the oven. It took her a few seconds to figure out how to set the timer, but once she figured it out, she was in commission. She leaned against the kitchen counter and let the pizzas do their thing.

“Hello there.”

When she heard Ben's voice, she nearly jumped out of her skin. She spun around to face him, her cheeks flushed. “Uh... hi.”

He leaned against the counter right next to her. Unnecessarily close proximity was something he had in common with his brother. “How are you, little nanny?”

Little nanny. That was the second time he had called her that, wasn't it? She needed to put him in his place! “Why do you keep calling me that? I'm not little. Geez, I'm older than you!”

“Are you?” Benjamin grinned at her. “I hadn't noticed.”

“Puh-lease. It's pretty obvious, isn't it?” She picked up one of the Chicago Town boxes and gave him a gentle rap on the head.

“How old are you?”

“Don't you know it's rude to ask a lady her age?” She raised the pizza box again, and he flinched, so she thought she'd spare him. “If you really must know, I'm thirty-two years old.”

“You don't look that old.”

She rolled her eyes at the back-handedness of that statement. “Wow. Thanks.”

“No, really. I thought you were about twenty-five. That's a good thing, isn't it?”

“Well, the fact of the matter is, I'm OLD. We're talking old as Methuselah old. So you shouldn't go around calling me little nanny.”

“Goodness, you're not that old,” he corrected her. “And besides... you are little. You're short. Skinny...”

She stood on her tiptoes. “I'm not that short!”

“Oh?”

“No!” At 5'4”, she wasn't exactly an Amazon, but she had never considered herself short. “You're just unnaturally tall.”

“Good. Women like tall men, don't they?” Benjamin went to the refrigerator and grabbed a beer. He popped the cap and started guzzling it down. When he finally came up for air, he asked, “Do you like tall men?”

“Why does it matter?”

“I'm just curious.”

“Okay. Yeah. I guess I like tall guys,” Zoe said. “I also like older guys.”

“You always like older men, or just sometimes?”

“Always,” she insisted.

“Well, there's a first time for everything.” He took another swig from his beer bottle. “We're talking about men in the thirty-plus category, right? Aren't most of the good ones taken by now? Your options must be dwindling.”

Zoe narrowed her eyes at him, as if she was trying to drill a hole in his head with her glare. “I think good men, in general, are a dying breed.”

“Ouch!”

She opened the oven to check the pizzas. Unfortunately, they weren't even close to being done, which meant she had to stand around in the kitchen with Benjamin awhile longer. Why wouldn't he just busy himself with something else? Did he enjoy harassing the nanny?

“So how old are you, Oxford boy?” she asked.

“Twenty two.”

Zoe pouted at him. “Awww. Just a baby! How cute.”

“Would you like to cradle me in your arms?” Ben laid his head on her shoulder and batted his eyelashes—his long, blonde eyelashes. “If you wanted to rock me to sleep, I wouldn't protest.”

Zoe hitched her shoulder a few times, trying to knock him off. When he finally lifted his head, she said, “I'm one boy's nanny... not two.”

“You mean my brother forgot to mention me in the job description?” Benjamin asked with a gasp. “Shame on him!”

Zoe went to the fridge and pulled out a Pepsi. “What does your nephew like to drink?”

“I have no idea. Anything, I guess.”

So she grabbed another Pepsi and laid them both on the counter.

“What... you're not going to ask me what I want to drink?” Ben asked, his lips sagging in a faux frown.

She pointed at his beer. “I thought you already had one.”

“True. I forgot.” And with that, Benjamin took another drink. He leaned against the counter again, his eyes fastened on Zoe. More specifically, he was staring at her butt. He thought she had a cute, round little bottom, possibly the cutest he had ever seen. “I think you're terribly adorable,” he blurted.

“Um... thanks.” She thought he was pretty cute too, but there was no way she was going to give him the satisfaction of knowing that. Besides, she really did prefer the company of older men. She didn't think she had it in her to flirt with a guy who was a decade younger than her.

“Is there a special bloke in your life?” When she didn't say anything, Benjamin added, “Do you have a boyfriend?”

“No.”

But there was a “bloke” in her life—last week. She didn't think her new acquaintances needed to know about that. In her opinion, Lewis and Ben were both far too interested in her personal life.

“I'm single too,” Benjamin said.

“Good for you.”

Benjamin's smile widened, which made the dimples appear. He really was impossibly cute. The sight of his dimpled smile made her want to pinch his cheeks.

The timer went off, so Zoe pulled the pizzas out of the oven. “Is there a pizza cutter around here?” she asked. Benjamin pulled one out of the drawer and handed it over. “Thanks.”

He watched her cut the pizza, fascinated by her every movement. Her brown ponytail swayed every time she bent over the pizza. “I can see why my brother hired you.”

She flashed a puzzled look over her shoulder. “Why? Because of my awesome pizza cutting skills?”

“No.”

She threw a few slices of pizza onto a plate and held it out to him. If she fed him, maybe he would get out of her hair.

But she wasn't so lucky. Ben didn't move an inch. He kept leaning against the counter, staring at her as he gobbled down a slice.

“By the way,” Ben said, speaking with a mouthful of pizza, “Chris is in the game room.”

“And where's that?”

“Come on. I'll take you there.”

She filled two more plates with steaming pizza slices, then she followed Benjamin to the game room. Inside the room, there was a plush sofa, two bean bag chairs, every video game system imaginable, and the biggest television she had ever seen. Rows and stacks of video games cluttered a nearby shelf. It had to be a gamer's heaven.

When she entered, she didn't see Chris right away because his body was practically swallowed up by one of the bean bag chairs. “Hey, Chris,” she greeted him. “I brought you some pizza.”

“Okay.” He reached for the pizza plate with one hand, and his other hand kept pounding away at his game controller. Chris put the pizza on his lap, took a huge bite, and had both hands back on the controller in no time.

“What do you say, Chris?” Ben asked.

“Huh?” The boy never moved his eyes from the telly.

Ben swatted the back of his nephew's head, but it didn't seem to phase him. “You should thank the lady!”

“Thanks,” Chris obligatorily barked. He took another bite of pizza and kept playing his game.

Zoe sat on the sofa and started eating her pizza. To her dismay, Ben sat down right next to her. He even draped an arm across the back of the couch, which had her feeling encompassed.

“So, Chris... what are you playing?” Zoe asked, hoping to make conversation. She didn't know the first thing about video games, but she thought she would make an attempt.

“Nothing.”

Zoe stared at the television, where a colorful character was dashing across the screen. “It doesn't look like nothing.”

“Hey, Chris... you're being a prat!” Benjamin admonished him.

With a roll of his eyes, Chris answered, “It's Zelda.”

“Oh, cool.” Zoe nibbled on her pizza and watched the screen, where Link hacked and slashed his way through a maze full of giant spiders. “I used to have a boyfriend who'd play those games.”

“Oh, yeah?” Ben asked. “And what was his name?”

“Jack.”

“And what happened to dear old Jack?”

Zoe grumbled a curse word under her breath. What sort of satisfaction could he possibly derive from grilling her about her exes? “I dunno. We kind of drifted apart. Why are you asking me this?”

Benjamin shrugged. “Just curious.”

“What about YOUR ex-girlfriend, Ben? What can you tell me about her? Did you like her? How old was she? What color hair did she have? Where does she live now? Do you ever think about her?”

Benjamin chuckled, seemingly unaffected by her sarcastic barrage of questions. “She was twenty-one. A blonde. I think she lives in Essex. As for the question do I ever think about her...” Benjamin looked over at Zoe, who he still had wrapped in his arm. “Why in the world would I spare a thought for her when I'm sitting next to someone as fascinating as you?”

Zoe knew what he was doing. He was toying with her. He was just flirting with her for his own amusement, but it wasn't as if he really liked her. She needed to throw him off his game. “I could have babysat you, you know.”

“Pardon?”

“When you were Chris' age, I was eighteen,” Zoe said. “I could have been your nanny.”

“That's... an interesting thought.” With a grin, he added, “and kind of kinky.”

Zoe rolled her eyes. So much for trying to turn him off!

“So, Chris, how's the pizza?”

“Good,” Chris answered curtly.

“You know, if there's anything you like to eat, feel free to tell me,” Zoe said, “and I'll try to make it for you.”

Chris shrugged. “I don't care.”

“Great,” Zoe said with a chuckle. “Then I can make you some of my favorites. Spinach and asparagus stew.... broccoli spears... an eggplant and sardine sandwich...”

Her humor was lost on the boy, who just shrugged and said, “whatever.”

“Wow... he really is in top form today,” Benjamin said with a sigh. “Sorry he's being such a little snot.”

“It's okay. I'm used to little snots.”

Benjamin's eyes twinkled with amusement. “Why do I get the impression you're referring to me?”

“I'm not.” Zoe gave him a playful little shove. Oh god, was she flirting with him?! “You're what I'd call a BIG snot, Ben.”

Chapter Six

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

You know what I hate? The word “cougar.” Ugh! If a girl is even a few years older than the guy she's dating, some jerk-off is going to call her a cougar at some point.

If only she wouldn't have needed to go to the bathroom that night, she wouldn't have run into Ben. With no makeup. In her pajamas.

“Well, well... hello there,” he greeted her. His eyes combed over her entire body, from her head to her toes. She was barefoot, wearing super-short pink shorts and a tank top. She really needed to invest in a pair of yoga pants, because she felt naked in her current attire. Or was she just being silly?

“Uh... hi.” He was standing in the middle of the hallway, blocking her escape. She kept trying to peer beyond his shoulder, hoping he would get the message and step out of her path, but he didn't budge. “Is there something I can help you with?”

“Oh, I'm sure there are many things you could help me with, but I can't imagine you would be willing.” He scratched his head. “Or maybe you would be willing? You think I should try my luck?”

“No.”

“That's a shame.” Zoe tried to skirt around him, so he put an arm against the wall, trapping her. “So you're not attracted to me?”

What should she say? Of course she thought he was attractive. Anyone in their right mind would think he was the most adorable human being on the face of the earth. But she had way too many reasons to keep her opinion to herself. For one, flirting with her employer's brother was incredibly unprofessional, even if he did start flirting with her first.

“You're... alright,” she finally admitted.

“Alright?! Ouch!” Ben's hand flew to his chest, over his heart. “You wound me!”

She really was going to wound him if he didn't move out of her way! “Honestly, Ben, I think most women would find you attractive, but I haven't really been paying attention. Now... if you don't mind?” She pointed behind him, indicating that she needed to pass.

“You really can't stand to be around me?”

Whenever he was around, she was susceptible to a racing pulse, clammy hands, and shortness of breath. So, in a way, she really couldn't stand to be around him. “It's not you. I just...” She almost told him she needed to pee, but it would have been way more than he needed to know.

He leaned closer and demonstrated his most disarming smile. “You don't think I'm kind of cute?”

“I--”

Benjamin batted his eyelashes. She had to bite her tongue so she wouldn't laugh. “Pleeeease. Give me a little hope here!”

“Alright!” she threw up her arms in defeat. “Yes. Fine. You're really, really cute, Ben. You're a prime catch.”

“You're just saying that.”

She shook her head. “No. I'm not.”

“Yes you are!”

“No. I'm not. You have a mirror, don't you? You obviously know you're cute,” she said with a sigh. “What about me? Are you attracted to me?” It didn't hurt to ask.

“Uh... YES! Isn't it obvious?” He reached toward her and tucked a flyaway strand of hair behind her ear. “You have nice legs, by the way.”

“Okay, now THAT'S a little inappropriate!”

“Is it? Sorry.” Ben shrugged. “That's just the way we do it here in England. We're more direct. We don't beat around the bush like you yanks do.”

All of a sudden, Zoe ducked under his arm and sprinted down the hallway. She turned around and stuck her tongue out at him. Sure, it was childish, but she didn't really care. He deserved it.

“Ah... clever girl!” he called to her. “It looks like you got the jump on me!”

“Goodnight, Ben!” Zoe shouted down the hall. “Behave yourself, okay? I don't want to have to tell your brother you've been naughty!”

“Now you're sounding like a true nanny!” he kept shouting at her, even as she disappeared around the corner. “Will you spank me if I'm bad?”

When she was gone, Ben couldn't stop smirking. The nanny had certainly put an end to his summer doldrums. He headed to his brother's room, hoping to catch him alone. He didn't want to run into Gemma, the slag. She could suck the fun out of any situation.

Unfortunately, Lewis wasn't alone. When Lewis came to the door, Gemma was sitting on the bed, her face marred by a familiar sneer.

“I'm sorry,” Benjamin said, “is this a bad time?”

“No... come in, come in.” Lewis stepped aside, ushering his brother into the room. “Is something bothering you?”

“Something is bothering ME!” Gemma spoke up, “It's late, Ben. Can't this wait until tomorrow?”

Benjamin, ignoring Gemma's remark, asked, “How was your outing?”

“Dreadful,” said Lewis.

“Lovely,” said Gemma.

Their contrasting opinions made Ben raise and eyebrow. “Alriiight.”

“How was it here?” Lewis asked. “With the nanny? Everything alright?”

Gemma crashed on the bed with a “hmph.” Any mention of the nanny, however innocent, was enough to make her seethe.

“Everything was fine... although Chris was being a bit of a prat.”

“What's new?” Lewis asked with a sigh.

“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about the nanny...” Ben said. “You see, I'm a bit smitten with her.”

“Oh really?” Lewis crossed his arms. He was a bit smitten with the nanny as well, but it wasn't as if he could admit it. Not while Gemma was scowling at him.

“I'm going to get into the nanny's knickers... mark my words,” Ben announced. “You're not going to be angry with me, are you? If I shag the nanny?”

“I don't approve!” Gemma whined. “She's way too old for you, Ben. Way, way too old. Not to mention... she's an American, of all things! That's the worst of it.”

As usual, Lewis ignored his wife. “Just don't do anything to make her uncomfortable, Ben. I know how you get when you're around girls.”

“Okay. Fine.” Ben retreated for the door, because he couldn't take much more of Gemma's disapproving glare. “Oh, and one more thing...”

Simultaneously, Gemma and Lewis asked, “What?”

“I was wondering if I could have a party here,” Ben said. “Just a little social gathering... nothing too wild. I just wanted to invite a few of my mates over for drinks.”

“No!” Gemma shouted.

“Go right ahead,” Lewis countered.

The husband and wife exchanged glances. A moment later, Gemma fussed, “Well, I guess that means you'll be having your party... since no one ever listens to me!”

Chapter Seven

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

American men are pigs. British men are pigs with accents.

Zoe really wanted to have story time with Chris. Alas, it wasn't going as smoothly as she would have hoped. She was trying everything she could think of to reach out to Chris, but he wasn't going to make it easy on her.

She drifted around his bedroom in search of a good book. He had all of the Harry Potters, in paperback and hard cover. There were a few books by Roald Dahl, C.S. Lewis, and several titles she had never heard of before.

She picked up Prince Caspian and wagged it over Chris' bed. “Do you read this? It seems pretty ambitious for an eight-year-old.”

As Chris' attention was fixed on his Nintendo DS, he almost missed her question. “I read it.”

“Wow. You must be very smart for your age!”

Chris shrugged. “Maybe you were just stupid for your age.”

Zoe's jaw dropped. A comment like that was worthy of a reprimand, wasn't it? She was supposed to be in charge of Chris' discipline, but she didn't want to do or say anything to drive him away. There was a chasm between them, and the only way to close the chasm was to be as relatable as possible. “You know, you're probably right,” she agreed. “I didn't do much reading when I was a kid. I was more of a cartoons person.”

“Cartoons are stupid,” Chris snorted.

“Okaaay.” She started pacing around the room, searching for a topic of conversation that might grab his interest. As much as he seemed to hate her, it was a miracle that he had even allowed her into his bedroom. He did, after all, have a giant KEEP OUT sign right outside the door. “So what are you playing?”

Chris sneered at her over his DS. “What do you care? You don't play games.”

“Well... I'm just curious.”

“Pokemon,” Chris said with a shrug. He didn't move his eyes away from the game screen, not even for a second. As far as Zoe could tell, video games was his only hobby.

Video games and Harry Potter.

Zoe picked up an action figure of Ron Weasley from Chris' desk. “Ah... I know who this is!”

Chris glanced over at her, but only for a moment.

“Ron was always one of my favorite characters... in the books, and in the movies,” Zoe tried to converse. “I always liked Snape too. Are you a Snape fan?”

“No.”

“Hagrid?”

“No.” Chris turned away from her, and now she could only see his back. "Hagrid is stupid."

“We'll have to venture out on a day trip soon... just you and me. Do you think that would be fun?”

“No.”

Ignoring his negativity, she said, “I've been researching places to visit in Oxfordshire. Being the cheesy American that I am, I kind of wanted to visit a medieval castle. Are there any in this area?”

“I dunno.”

“What about Broughton Castle? Have you ever been there?” She kept staring at Ron Weasley, wishing he could cast some sort of anti-brat spell on the little boy in the bed.

“No.”

“What about Blenheim Palace?”

This time, Chris didn't reply. Apparently, he had enough of her questions. But that wasn't going to stop her.

“So how do you feel aboooout...” Zoe hesitated a moment, “your uncle?”

“Uncle Ben?”

Zoe had to purse her lips to keep from laughing, because an image of a kindly old man on a rice box popped into her head. “Uh huh.”

“He's alright.”

“Really?!” This was a first. Chris didn't seem to like anyone. He didn't like her. He didn't like his parents. If he liked Ben, maybe Ben was the way to Chris' heart? “Maybe we could all go to Blenheim Palace together? Do you think that would be fun?”

“I dunno. Maybe.”

Success! It was the first thing out of Chris' mouth that wasn't exceedingly negative. “Well... good. I'll have to see if he's interested.”

Chris turned off his Nintendo DS and tossed it across his bed. As soon as the game music was off, Zoe could hear music in the distance. Somewhere in the house, someone was blasting some extremely loud rock. The bass was so loud, it made the floor vibrate. “Do you hear that?” she asked.

“Yeah. Ben's having a party.”

“Oh... he is, is he?” Zoe glanced at the clock. It was nearly 10 o'clock—Chris' bedtime. If Ben didn't turn his music down soon, she would have to have a word with him. “Why is he having a party?”

Chris shrugged. “I dunno.”

“Are you ready for bed?”

Chris puckered his lips, trying to conceal the fact that he was yawning. “No. Not really. I'm not tired yet.” When Chris settled his gaze on her, his little blue eyes were full of fury. “Do you think you could leave now?”

“Aww. Am I bothering you?”

“Yes.”

Zoe grabbed a copy of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory from the shelf. It had been ages since she had read it, and for some reason, the title was making her salivate. She had heard some British people say that American candy was awful, but she thought British candy left something to be desired. There was nothing quite as satisfying as a plain, old Hershey bar. “Have you read this before?” she asked.

“No. But I've seen the movie.”

“Which one? The Johnny Depp one or the classic?” Zoe asked. “Because I prefer the classic one myself.”

Chris rolled his eyes at her question.

“Sooo, anyway...” Zoe sat at the end of Chris' bed, even though it was probably the last thing he would want her to do. “Would you like me to read it to you?”

Chris' response was adamant. “HELL no.”

“Hey now! That's not very nice!” Zoe opened Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and started reading the first page to herself. She tried to put on a brave face, but there was only so much negativity she could stomach. “And you should watch your language.”

“Fuck no,” Chris said. There was a cheeky grin on his lips, as if he was flaunting the fact that he was testing her patience.

“Chris! I'm serious! Watch your mouth!”

“How can I watch my mouth? I don't have a mirror,” Chris said, still smirking.

“Look, Chris... the fact of the matter is, you're stuck with me... at least for awhile,” Zoe said. “We can try to get along, or you can keep trying to make me miserable. It's your choice.”

“I think I would prefer to make you miserable,” Chris snidely replied.

“Your dad wanted me to read to you, so--”

“My dad is a stupid git.” Chris sat up, twisted the book out of Zoe's hand, and tossed it across the room. “Now, if you would be so kind... leave. If sleeping is the only way to get you out of here, then I'm going to sleep.”

“Okaaay...” How long could she let him talk back to her, use foul language, and boss her around? If he kept it up, she would need to come up with a way to punish him. But nothing too harsh—even though he could probably use it. “I'll see you tomorrow?”

“Unfortunately.”

“Would you like a hug goodnight?” she teased him. “A big, fat kiss?”

“Nooooooo!”

Just to spite him, she leaned down and kissed his forehead. He threw out a fist, which barely missed her face. “Goodnight.”

Chris rolled over and buried his face in his pillow. “Go away!” he murmured into his pillow.

With nothing left to say, Zoe turned off the light and slipped out of the room. As soon as she stepped into the hallway, the music intensified. The bass was vibrating the ground with so much force, she swore she could feel her teeth rattling. There was no way Chris could sleep with all that noise.

Zoe stormed down the hallway in search of the music. She hated to be a spoilsport, but she needed to get Ben to turn the music down. As she followed her ears to the music, she passed a twenty-something couple, devouring each other with their hands and lips. Zoe sidestepped the amorous partygoers and continued down the hall.

Zoe pushed open the door to the game room, where most of Ben's mates were clustered. Ben was sitting on the couch, sandwiched between two bottle blondes. One was sitting on his lap, kissing his neck. The other woman was standing behind him, combing her fingers through his hair. Ben had lipstick stains all over his face, likely from the two trashy bimbos beside him.

She approached him unabashedly. “BEN!”

“Ohhh... Zoe!” he moaned. Ben pushed the blonde from his lap and hopped to his feet. He staggered a bit, most likely because he had been enjoying a few drinks. He certainly smelled like he had. “I meant to invite you... I cuddint find you,” he slurred.

“Uh... that's okay.” She looked around the room, where twenty or thirty kids in their early twenties were dancing, drinking, and grinding against each other. She might have enjoyed this sort of thing when she was in college, but not anymore.

Actually, she wouldn't have enjoyed it even if she was Ben's age. She was never the sort to go out and drink and party. She tried beer once, but hated the taste. She tried marijuana once, but it wasn't her thing. Apart from a few minor incidents, Zoe never ventured from the straight and narrow. She was certain there were a few illegal drugs being passed around the room—definitely some cannabis.

“Beeeennn!” one of the bottle blondes cooed. “I miss your lap! Come back!” She wriggled her butt against the sofa, which made her skimpy red dress ride up even higher.

He stared at the woman, then he stared at Zoe. Clearly, he was at an impasse. If he wanted a shag tonight, which he most certainly did, his choice should have been obvious. However, his interest in Zoe, even in his current state of inebriation, far outweighed his desire to hook up with a random tart. He took Zoe by the elbow and led her away from the crowd, and the sight of her frowning face seemed to sober him up a bit.

“Is something wrong, Zoe?”

“Yes!” She had her arms crossed again. “The music's too loud. Chris is trying to sleep.”

“He can hear it all the way up there?”

“Yes!”

“Alright. I'll turn it down...” Ben glanced around the room. In the distance, a few young people let out a whoop of excitement. He hated to deprive them of their fun. “In a bit.”

“Do it NOW!” she insisted. “You wouldn't want someone blasting music while you were trying to sleep, would you?”

“Cummon, Zoe!” Ben whined, still slurring a bit. “It's not like he's got to wake up early tomorrow! It's not like he has school or something! It's a Friday night!”

“It's a Thursday night.”

Ben's face pinched together. “Izzit?”

“It is.” Zoe uncrossed her arms and pointed to the giant sound system—the source of the cacophony. “You don't have to turn it off... just turn it down. It would be nice if the bass wasn't jiggling my boobs from clear across the other side of the house!”

“I--” His mind's eye image of her jiggling boobs had him temporarily tongue-tied. “Wot?”

Zoe marched over to the sound system. If he wouldn't do it, she would have to turn it down herself! She found the dial and cranked it down several notches. When she was done, she returned to Ben—but he wasn't alone. Two other boys, about Ben's age, had accosted him. One of them, a rat-faced redhead, leapt onto Ben's back. If he wanted a piggyback ride, he wasn't going to get one. Ben knocked him off and punched him in the arm.

“Hey... Zoe!” Ben tried to call her over, but she was suddenly feeling reluctant. “Come here. I want you to meet some of my mates.”

Zoe approached with caution, and the rat-faced redhead grinned at her. Ben's other friend was a stocky brunette, whose handsome face was marred by a few patches of acne.

“This is James,” Ben said, slapping the redhead on the shoulder. “As you can see, he's a ginger. Try not to hold it against him.”

“This ain't ginger!” James protested, running a hand through his thick, messy hair. “It's strawberry blonde!”

“And this is Jordan,” Ben introduced the other bloke, who seemed to have a pleasantly calm disposition. “Not much to say about him, really.”

Jordan held out a hand to Zoe, which she gladly accepted. It was nice to see a gentleman in the midst of the madness. “You must be Zoe, right?” Jordan asked. “It's a pleasure to meet you.”

“Likewise,” Zoe agreed.

“Zoe... the nanny?!” James squawked. “You're right. She is pretty fit!”

So Ben had been talking about her, at least a little bit. She didn't know if she should be flattered or irritated. “I turned your music down,” she reported.

“Honestly, I was expecting a minger. Ben said you were hot, but he usually has terrible taste,” James went on. “Is it true you're an American?”

Zoe chuckled. He made it sound like being an American was something close to legendary. “I am.”

“Nice.” James said, gaping at her like a slack-jawed fish. His eyes shamelessly scanned the length of her body, and when he was done gawking, he winked at her. “I thought nannies were supposed to be homegrown. Like Mary Poppins and shit."

“Not me,” Zoe said with a shrug. “I'm American, through and through.”

All of a sudden, Ben wrapped an arm around her, as if staking his claim on her. He didn't want his friends moving in on his prey.

“I like Americans,” loquacious James continued. “Especially American woman. They're the most gorgeous women in the world... aside from Italian women. And Brazilian women.”

“Ohhh... Italian woman!” Jordan echoed. Maybe he wasn't as much of a gentleman as she had hoped?

“I don't care about other women,” Ben said. He smiled down at her, but she wasn't paying attention to him. “I only care about Zoe.”

Zoe ducked out from under Ben's arm. She eyed the door, wondering how she could excuse herself without sounding rude. Standing around with a bunch of obnoxious 21-year-olds wasn't exactly her idea of a good time.

“Would you like a drink?” Ben asked.

“No thanks.”

“You sure? I'll go get one for you.”

“I'm good,” Zoe insisted.

James held out a rolled-up joint, confirming her suspicions about the cannabis. “Spliff?” he offered.

“Uh... no. I'll pass.”

“Alright.” James sucked on it, then he passed it to Jordan. “If you need anything, love, let me know. Especially if you want what's in my trousers.” He illustrated his comment with a thrust of his crotch.

“Heeey,” Ben cautioned him. “Leave Zoe alone.”

“I can't help it. I like the American nanny,” James said. “You know I like older women.”

“Zoe doesn't like younger men,” Ben said, pouting. “She already made that quite clear.”

Zoe started feeling a bit light-headed, as if their intoxication had somehow been transferred to her. She needed to leave. “Well, Ben... I better get going.”

“Awww. Leaving so soon?” It was Jordan who protested. “But you just got here! You're the most interesting girl in this room. Just look around.”

Zoe did as she was told; her eyes drifted around the room. She spotted the bottle blondes, a girl with spiky magenta hair, and a girl in a barely-there top. Jordan was right. She probably was the only decent female in the room.

“Would you care to touch me, Zoe?” James asked. “Because I'd love to tell everyone I was touched by an angel!”

“What kind of pick-up line is that?” Ben chuckled.

“A good one, wasn't it?” James grinned at her, possibly the dopiest grin she had ever seen. “But I'd rather touch her. Specifically, I wouldn't mind touching her bum.”

Zoe started inching away from them. They were like animals. Drunk, immature, mindless animals.

“The only one who'll be touching Zoe's bum is ME!” Ben declared. To prove his point, he swatted her rear end and gave it a squeeze.

Zoe's jaw dropped. “Did you seriously just slap my butt?!”

“Ohhh, come on!” Ben laughed. “It's all in good fun. Why don't you lighten up a bit, Zo? You're not that old. If you keep acting like a dried-up old crone, you'll never have any fun!”

All she could do was glare at him. Perhaps he would realize, once he had a chance to sober up, that he had crossed the line. “Goodnight, Benjamin.”

“Are you angry? Seriously angry?” Ben reached for her, but she pulled her arm away. “Come on, Zoe. Give me a kiss. Let's kiss and make up!”

Even James was shaking his head at Ben. He could tell his friend was taking the situation from bad to worse.

“It was nice meeting you two,” she said to James and Jordan, though her words were hardly genuine. “Goodnight.”

“Nice meeting you too,” said Jordan.

“Have a great night, love!” James shouted at her as she fled. “Dream of me when you sleep! I know I'll be dreaming of you!” When Zoe was gone, Ben punched him in the arm. “Ow!”

Chapter Eight

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Now I know how Cinderella felt. I have one ugly stepsister, and she has bright red hair. Kind of like a clown.

Lewis was always gone. In fact, Zoe hadn't seen hide nor hair of him in two days. She had no idea what he did for a living, only that he made a ton of money, and it required him to be in meetings for most of the day.

Gemma, however, did nothing. She laid around on the couch all day, sipping cocktails and watching Hollyoaks. She had adopted a new favorite pastime; however, which involved ordering Zoe around.

“Get me some crisps.”

So Zoe wandered off to the kitchen and opened the cupboard where they kept their “crisps.” When she returned, Gemma snatched the bag out of her hand without uttering even the merest word of thanks.

“Pour me another drink, please. The bottle's over there.” Gemma lifted her glass and waved it, as if she was signaling a servant. Of course, Gemma could have easily moved from the couch, walked across the room, and poured a glass for herself. It was much more satisfying to watch the nanny do it.

Zoe filled Gemma's glass and laid it on the table.

“Oh... and Zoe?” Gemma pointed to the window, where a strip of light was seeping through the blinds. “Will you close the curtains? The light is making the telly a bit hazy.”

Yes, master. She was tempted to say that to Gemma, but she held her tongue. She was starting to feel like a maid, not the nanny. She didn't realize she would be at Gemma's beck and call.

Zoe snapped the curtains shut, then she spun around. “Anything else, Gemma?” Zoe asked, hoping the lady of the house would pick up on the hint of sarcasm in her voice.

“No. I think that'll be all. But—OH!” Gemma took another sip of her drink and sat up. “You mentioned something about taking Chris on a little outing. I think that would be brilliant. Do you think you could do that?”

Of course, Gemma's desire to schedule an outing for her son was mired in self-interest. She just wanted the place to herself, sans Chris.

“I... don't mind,” Zoe said. And she really wouldn't have minded, if not for the fact that Chris hated her, and every word out of the boy's mouth made her more and more miserable.

“Oh... and we've been meaning to tell you... the spare car is at your disposal,” Gemma said. “It's the Audi R8. The key is over there on the table.” Gemma flicked a hand in the general direction of the key. “Chris has his first day of school in a few days, and you'll be using that car to pick him up. As for your outing, if you could leave sooner than later, that would be great.” Her eyes never wandered from the television screen, not even for a moment.

“Do you have any input on where I should take him?”

Gemma didn't say anything.

“Any input at all? Broughton Castle? Blenheim Palace? Some place I haven't heard of?”

Still nothing.

“Alright then...” Zoe grabbed the key and studied it for a moment before slipping it into her pocket. “I guess I'll be leaving then.”

“Oh, and Zoe... before you go...” Gemma's voice trailed off for a moment. “If you don't mind, would you get me a slice of chocolate cake? Thanks.”

* * *

After delivering the cake to Gemma, Zoe took a moment to decide where she wanted to take Chris. She had been leaning toward Broughton Castle, and she was almost swayed by the fact that part of Shakespeare in Love had been filmed there. However, she wanted to visit a medieval castle, and Broughton wasn't really a castle—more like a medieval manor house. A quick search on Google confirmed that Blenheim Palace would be the more impressive option.

As she was heading off to fetch Chris, she ran into Benjamin in the hallway—much to her dismay. She stared at the wall as she walked, but it was too much to hope he would pass by without a word. Even if she didn't make eye contact, he wasn't going to let her get away.

“Zoe.”

Maybe a quick and jovial greeting would be enough? “Hi.”

She tried to walk by, but he grabbed her arm. “Zoe... wait. I need to talk to you.”

Zoe had no choice but to turn and face him. “Okay then. Talk.”

“I'm really sorry about last night,” Ben apologized. “My friends were terrible... especially James. And I was terrible. I had a few too many drinks, but that's no excuse. I acted like a jerk, and I'm sorry.”

“It's okay, Ben,” she said with a shrug. “It's not like I've never had my butt slapped before.”

“You aren't angry?”

She was more vexed than angry. His behavior was inappropriate, and he had crossed the line—especially in front of his friends—but it would take more than that to make her angry. “No. Not really.”

“Does that mean I can touch your butt again?”

Zoe snickered. “Uh, no.”

“Damn.”

Zoe slipped her hand into her pocket and clutched the key, reminding herself she had somewhere to be. “Anyway, I've got to go. I'll see you later.”

She started walking again, and he trailed after her. “You look like a woman on a mission. Where are you going?”

“Blenheim Palace,” the answer slipped out of her mouth before she had a chance to think about it. What if he invited himself along? It would be like having two little boys under her supervision, and she didn't need to make her job more difficult.

Then again, didn't Chris have an affinity for his uncle? Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all.

“You wanna come?” she asked.

“Um...”

Ben's hesitation made her frown. She assumed he would leap at any opportunity to spend time with her. Why had she made that assumption? It wasn't as if he really liked her—even though she secretly wished he did.

"Sure," he finally decided. "When are you going?"

"Now." Ben looked a bit surprised by her answer. "Meet me in front of the house in about ten minutes. I need to find Chris."

"What if he doesn't want to go?"

"Oh, he'll go!" Zoe declared. "Even if he's kicking and screaming, he'll go."

* * *

Ben parked the car in the Blenheim Palace parking lot. He had agreed to drive, since Zoe wasn't entirely comfortable with driving on the "wrong" side of the road. Predictably, Chris fussed the entire way.

"This is stupid!" he shouted. Chris stared out the window, at the building that looked a bit like a replica of Versailles. Even though it was impressive, he had to hate it. It was in his nature to hate anything and everything.

"I think it's beautiful!" Zoe exclaimed. "Can you imagine living in a place like that?" She looked over at Ben. "Your house is big enough."

"It's not my house," Ben pointed out. "It's my brother's."

"Oh. Yeah. Well... it's Chris' house!" She smiled at Chris, but his face was as sour as ever.

"And that's why he's completely and utterly spoiled." Ben yanked out the key and leapt out of the car, so Zoe followed suit. Chris stayed in the back of the vehicle, arms crossed, unwilling to budge.

"Come on, mate," Ben said. "Stop being an arse and get out of the car."

"NO!" Chris glared at Ben, who he usually liked. As far as Chris was concerned, Ben was on the nanny's side, and that wasn't cool. "I don't want to!"

"Come onnnn!" Ben tried to reach into the backseat to give Chris a tug. "If you come, I'll give you a fiver."

"Really?"

Zoe shook her head. She didn't approve of bribery, but if it was the only way to avoid a scene--

"Yeah." Ben opened the back door and motioned for Chris to exit. "I'll give you a fiver, or I'll give you a facer. It's your choice."

Chris slid out of the backseat, though obviously against his will. "Alright..." Zoe laid a hand on the small of his back and guided him forward, in the direction of the palace.

"You know," Ben started, "Winston Churchill was born here."

"Who cares?"

"I didn't know that!" Zoe said, in an effort to make Ben feel better about his trivia. "That's interesting."

Chris ran a few paces ahead of them and stomped on a bumblebee. Completely unfazed by his insect murder, he turned around and asked, "Do we get to tour the big house?" He was careful not to sound too eager.

"Uh huh." Zoe nodded. "That's the plan."

"What about the maze? Do we get to go to the maze?" Chris asked, referring to the hedge maze at Blenheim Palace; Marlborough Maze, the second largest in the world.

"Uh... maybe," was Zoe's half-hearted reply. "Is there some sort of panic button for people who get lost?"

"I'll lead the way!" Ben declared, coiling an arm around Zoe's back. He pulled her closer, hanging on her as they walked. "When we walk along all cozy like this, I'm sure we look like a couple." With mischief in his eyes, he added, "And Chris looks like our son."

"And how is that even possible? Did you have him when you were, like, twelve?!"

"Fourteen," Ben corrected her. "What can I say? I was a randy chap."

"Randy chap," she repeated with a chuckle. British English never ceased to amuse her. "And do you know how old I was when you were... fourteen?"

"Uh... twenty-four?"

"Exactly. I would have been arrested for that." She shrugged his arm off her shoulder. "So Chris is most definitely not our kid."

"Well... I'm just imagining what other people might think. It's not like they'd look at us and immediately recognize the difference between our ages," Ben said. "We look the same age, give or take."

"If you say so."

They bought their tickets for the house and grounds, and they lined up for a guided tour. The guide took them into the house, where an array of lavish decorations were on display. Portraits, tapestries, porcelain--it was a whirlwind of luxury and color. They even got to see the room where Winston Churchill was born. Had Chris shown even the slightest bit of interest, it would have been a miracle.

At the end of the house tour, they grabbed a map and took a self-guided tour of the garden. There was so much ground to cover, Zoe wished she had worn suitable shoes. They weren't fancy shoes, as she could never justify spending more than fifty dollars on a pair. However, after wandering around the water terraces and Italianate garden, she was in danger of getting blisters.

"The maze!" Chris squealed. "Let's go in the maze!"

"Ohhh... I don't know." Zoe looked at Ben, hoping he would back her up. But Ben, being the overgrown child that he was, looked just as eager to tackle the maze.

Ben reached for her hand. "Come on... hold my hand. So we won't get separated."

"Shouldn't you be more worried about Chris getting separated from us?"

"CHRIS!" Ben shouted so loud all of a sudden, he made Zoe jump.

"What?!"

"Don't wander too far off. Stay close to us."

"Awright."

Zoe took Ben's hand and followed him into the hedge maze, despite her reservations. In no time at all, she was surrounded by leafy green walls, and it was no surprise she was starting to feel a bit claustrophobic. However, Ben didn't appear to be the least bit concerned by the fact that they were lost, which put her at ease. At least a little bit.

On the bright side, Chris seemed to be having the time of his life. Every time they rounded a corner and found themselves facing a wall, he would shout, "DEAD END!" and run off in search of another path. He picked up a stick and started prodding the hedges, which made birds fly out of their hiding places.

"Chris!" Zoe exclaimed, "Don't poke the birds!"

So Chris turned around and poked her with the stick instead.

"Hey! No poking the nanny either!" Ben chided him. He looked over at Zoe and winked. "Unless the nanny wants me to poke her."

She swatted Ben in the back of the head. "Ben!"

"Hey! Sorry!" He held up his hands, guilty as can be. "I couldn't resist!"

After what felt like an eternity, they found their way out of the maze. They had been out in the sun so long, Zoe's cheeks were a bit sunburned. She didn't even think it was possible to get burnt in foggy England, but apparently it was. To make matters worse, Chris spun around and swatted her with his stick.

"Hey now!" Ben grabbed his nephew's stick and wrested it out of his hands. When he had the stick in his possession, he tossed it away. "You don't hurt ladies. Do you understand?"

"Bugger off."

Ben seized Chris by the nape and gave him a little wag. "Do you understand?"

"Yes! Alright!"

"Now, what do you say to Zoe?"

Ben didn't let go of Chris' neck until the boy gave her a tepid, "Sorry."

"Good." Ben looked over at Zoe and winked. "Now let's head back to the car."

As they made their way back to the car, Ben continued to hold her hand. Zoe was sure they did look like a couple, but she had to wonder if she looked like a cradle robber. Despite Ben's claim that they looked the "same age," she certainly didn't feel the same age as him.

"So... Zoe?" Ben lowered his voice, not wanting his nephew to overhear. "I had a good time. I'm glad you invited me."

"And I'm glad you came. I'm not sure I could have handled Chris on my own." With a roll of her eyes, she added, "Some nanny I am, huh?"

"I think you're a great nanny. You're very sweet to the boy... and you're easy on the eyes," he said. "Which leads me to my next question. Do you think I could take you out to dinner sometime?"

The Audi R8 was in sight. She wished she could make it back to the car and avoid his question altogether. "You mean... just the two of us?"

"Yes, just the two of us," Ben confirmed. "And if you want to get technical, then yes, I am asking you out on a date."

Ben's question had Zoe tongue-tied. On one hand, she thought he was terribly cute, possibly the best looking guy she had seen since arriving in England. And he seemed charming enough, even if he was a bit naughty at times. On the other hand, she didn't think she would ever be comfortable with the idea of dating someone who was ten years younger than she was. As young as he was, there was no way he could possibly be looking for the same thing she was looking for. She wanted a relationship. He wanted a fling.

"I'm sorry, Ben," she finally replied. "I can't."

"You can't?! Why?"

The answer was out of her mouth before she had a chance to think it over.

"I'm engaged to someone else."

Chapter Nine

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

I call it dish soap. They call it "washing-up liquid." That seems like a bit of a mouthful to me. And what self-respecting man is ever going to do the dishes when their "washing-up liquid" is called "Fairy?"

At least the toothpaste brands were the same. That's what crossed Zoe's mind as she slathered her toothbrush in Colgate. When she finished brushing her teeth, she grinned. With her teeth bared, she leaned as close to the mirror as she possibly could. As she leaned forward, her nightshirt slipped up, which would reveal a bit of her panties to anyone who happened to be standing behind her.

Of course, it was at this moment that Ben popped into the bathroom. When he caught a glimpse of her black knickers, he had to grin.

"HEY!" She spun around and pulled her nightshirt down. "Don't you ever knock?"

"I'm sorry." His apology was as tepid as the water she used to rinse her toothbrush.

"And yet... you keep standing there... staring at me while I'm trying to have a private moment in the bathroom." Zoe rolled her eyes. "You're unbelievable, Ben."

"Unbelievably attractive?" he asked with a grin.

"Unbelievably cocky... unbelievably vain... unbelievably--"

He laid a silencing finger over her lips. "Okay. I get it. You think I'm an arsehole."

"No. Not an arsehole," she repeated the word with a giggle. "But.... you should knock on the door before you go into the bathroom, okay? I could have been naked in here!"

"And it would have been my lucky day." The image of her black underwear flashed in his mind, and his goofy grin returned.

"It's bad enough as it is. I'm standing here in my nightshirt!"

"Oh, that's nothing!" Ben exclaimed. "You Americans can be such prudes."

"I don't think it's prudish. I think it's nice!" Zoe leaned against the sink and crossed her arms. "There are certain things that should be for your significant other's eyes only!"

"Which, in your case, would be your mysterious fiance." One of Ben's blonde eyebrows sprang to his forehead. "What is your fiance's name, anyway?"

"Kyle." As soon as his name was out of her mouth, Zoe's face twisted into a pained grimace. Why couldn't she have made something up? Why not Peter or William or Alec... anything but her real, live, ex-fiance's name. Every time she said his name, she could feel a sting in her heart.

"And where is Kyle right now? Back in the States?" Ben asked, his voice curiously incredulous. "Why would he let his lovely fiance out of his sight?"

"H-he's moving here soon," Zoe fibbed, compounding her lies.

"When we first met, I seem to remember you telling me you were single," Ben said. "Why would you lie?"

Oh dear. Had she really told him that? The last week of her life was such a blur, she couldn't remember what she had and had not said. "It was a lie," she fibbed again.

"And why would you lie to me, Zoe?" Ben reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, and the simple gesture was surprisingly sensual. Apparently, having a fiance wasn't going to be enough to deter him.

"I dunno. I guess it just slipped out of my mouth," Zoe said. "When you have a hot guy flirting with you, it's just--"

"Wait," Ben interrupted. "So the truth comes out! You think I'm hot?"

Zoe squinted her eyes together as tightly as she could. The conversation was going from bad to worse. "I... I mean... y-yeah, I guess." She didn't need to feed his ego. He already had a more than healthy dose of arrogance.

"Interesting," Ben said, his eyes dancing with amusement. "Then why won't you go out with me?"

"Uh, because I have a fiance," she reminded him, even though it wasn't true.

"You're attracted to me... I'm attracted to you, obviously. And Kyle isn't here." Ben looked down, staring at her bare legs. "Come on. Admit it. We have an undeniable chemistry."

"I don't know about that, Ben." She tried to tug down her nightshirt, which was one of Kyle's old shirts, but it simply wasn't long enough. She felt naked. "Anyway, do you think you could, uh, go away? I don't mean to be rude, but I'm standing here... in just a shirt... and it hardly seems fair."

"Not fair?" Ben asked with a chuckle. "Well then... maybe I should lose some of my clothes as well? Even the odds a bit?"

"No no no no, that's not what I meant!"

Before she could finish protesting, Ben had whipped his shirt over his head and tossed it to the ground. When she saw his bare chest, Zoe had to bite her tongue to stop herself from shouting oh my god. His body was perfect: lean and broad, muscular and sinewy. She couldn't stop her eyes from roving all over his chest, which, as far as she could tell, didn't have a trace of hair on it. His pecs were perfectly toned, and his sculpted abs were just begging to have a tongue on them. He even had the most prominent Apollo's belt she had ever seen.

Concentrate, Zoe, her subconscious screamed at her. She couldn't let him know the sight of his naked chest had muddled her brain and tied her tongue.

Ben leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest. When he did, his biceps seemed to bulge. "Well? What do you think?"

The sound of his voice made her pull her eyes away from his body. He wants me, Zoe reminded herself. She could have him--this beautiful, beautiful boy--in her bed. All she had to do was proposition him, and he would surely be there.

"I think..." What did she think? What could she possibly say to him without sounding like a total goofball? "I think you probably work out a lot."

Ben laughed, and when he did, the most adorable dimples appeared on his cheeks. "I don't work out all that much, actually. Just a few crunches and press-ups every now and then." He gestured toward her legs. "But you? With those legs, you must stay pretty active."

Zoe made a sputtering noise. "Hardly! I had to climb a lot of stairs though. At work... at my old apartment..." She crouched down, snatching his shirt from the floor. Despite the fact that the last thing she wanted him to do was put on his shirt, she said, "Get dressed. I need to finish up in here. If you need the bathroom, you're next in line."

When Ben pulled on his shirt, she swore she could feel her heart sighing. "I don't need the bathroom," he chuckled. "I was just hoping to vex you with my presence."

"Well... mission accomplished!" Zoe grabbed him by the shoulders and spun him toward the door. "Next time, don't forget to knock."

When he was through the door, Ben turned around and winked at her. "Next time, lock the door. It does have a lock, you know."

Following his advice, Zoe closed the door and locked it. Ben's presence was unsettling--there was no doubting that. And he was attractive, of course, but she couldn't allow herself to give into temptation. Having recently ended her engagement, hooking up with a 22-year-old was the last thing she needed.

Zoe turned around and frowned at her reflection in the mirror. She leaned closer, observing her face. There was slight discoloration in the corners of her eyes, where the beginnings of crow's feet were starting to form. "Hmph... maybe it is what I need," she said, snorting at her reflection. Her mom, her friends, Kyle--no one would have to know about her fling with a much younger man. It could be her secret.

"No way, Zoe. NO WAY!" she shouted at herself. "Don't even go there. Don't even think about going there!"

Before leaving the bathroom, Zoe pulled on a pair of shorts. After her run-in with Benjamin, she didn't feel comfortable roaming the hall in just a nightshirt. And it was a good thing she put on the shorts, because she ran into Lewis as soon as she stepped into the hallway.

"Oh... hi," she greeted him. When she noticed he was wearing a suit, she noted, "you got back from work late."

"True. Lately, my work has consumed my life," Lewis said with a sigh. "Are you getting ready for bed?"

"Yep." She nodded.

"How was Chris? Gemma mentioned something about an outing?"

"Oh. Yeah. Me and Chris and Ben all went to Blenheim Palace," she said. "It went well... aside from the fact that I got a little sunburnt." She pointed at her rosy forehead--as if he could miss it!

"I trust he was well behaved?" Lewis asked. "I'm referring to Chris, not Ben. Although... I am sure my brother's behavior is just as unpredictable."

"Chris was... decent," she said. It was too soon to upgrade his status to good.

"And Ben? He behaved himself?"

"B-Ben?!" What was she supposed to say to that?

"I have reason to believe he fancies you. If he's too much to handle, let me know. I can't have him flirting with the nanny at all hours of the day, can I? I wouldn't want him to make you uncomfortable."

Zoe closed her eyes and recalled the image of Ben's bare chest. Uncomfortable didn't even begin to describe it. "Ben's alright."

"Do you like him?"

Once again, she was taken aback. "Uh... what?!"

"Your feelings for Ben don't extend beyond friendship, do they?"

Here we go again, Zoe thought. It seemed the entire Eastham family was prone to asking inappropriate questions at all hours of the day. "He's a nice boy, but I don't even know if I'd call him a friend."

"Good... good," Lewis said. He rubbed the palms of his hands together, like a cartoon villain hatching a scheme. "Zoe, would you like to go out with me sometime?"

"WHAT?!" she shrieked. He might be her boss, but she wasn't beyond chastising him. "But you're married!"

"I-I didn't mean it like that," Lewis insisted, though she hardly believed him. "I just meant... it might be nice to go out sometime... for coffee or something."

"You go out for coffee in England? I thought it was all about tea here," she said, a poor attempt at lightening the mood.

"We do love our tea... but we enjoy the occasional coffee as well," Lewis said. "Will you go with me?"

Since he was her boss, would it be rude to refuse him outright? "I'll, uh... I'll think about it."

"Thinking about it is better than a no," Lewis said with a smirk. "I'll just keep nagging you until you accept."

"Goodnight, Lewis." She sidestepped him and continued down the hall, toward her bedroom.

"You look gorgeous, by the way!" Lewis called after her.

Zoe rolled her eyes as she stepped into her bedroom. "Didn't mean it like that my ass..." she murmured to herself.

As she crashed into bed, she secretly wished she would wake up on the opposite side of the Atlantic Ocean.

Chapter Ten

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

You know what I hate? Ex-girlfriends who feel like they're entitled to get handsy with the guy you like.

That's not to say I like anyone in particular, but still...

"Do you have everything you need?" Zoe stood beside the Audi R8, fretting over Chris like his mother should have been fretting over him. Unfortunately, she had not seen hide nor clown-red hair of Gemma. Zoe tried not to be judgmental, but she thought his mother could have at least tried to show some interest in her son's first day of school. "Did you get those pens and pencils I laid out for you?"

"Yeah," Chris murmured.

"Do you have your... bag?" Zoe wasn't sure what they called it in England. Book bag? Backpack? Rucksack? She figured "bag" was the safe bet.

"Got it." Chris lifted his rucksack and tossed it into the car.

"Alright. Climb in." Zoe climbed into the driver's seat, a bit reluctantly. It was her first attempt at driving on the "wrong" side of the road. When Chris got in, she observed his face in the rear-view mirror. Unless she was mistaken--which she rarely was--he had tears in his eyes. "You okay?"

Chris shrugged. He pulled his Nintendo DS out of his book bag and started to play.

"You don't like school, do you?"

Once again, the only reply she got was a shrug. Chris made no attempt to hide his disinterest in conversing with her.

"I didn't like school either," Zoe confessed. "I hated it. Until the sixth grade or so, I didn't have many friends. Only one or two good ones..."

"Just drive," Chris moaned.

"Okay..." She turned the key in the ignition and rolled out of the driveway. "I'm just trying to make you feel better." There had to be more to this kid--didn't there? She hadn't seen him with any friends, his parents hated each other, and they rarely acknowledged their son's existence. If Chris wasn't such a complete tyrant, she might have felt sorry for him.

When Zoe made it to the school, she breathed a sigh of relief. She felt like she was putting herself through driver's ed all over again. Once again, she checked the rear-view mirror, and when she did, she caught Chris wiping tears from his cheeks. Poor thing, she thought. She would have tried to comfort him, but she knew he wouldn't welcome her sympathy.

"Well... I guess this is it." Zoe pulled into the parking lot and waited for Chris to get out. He didn't budge. He didn't even turn off his DS. Rather than ask him to leave, she decided to give him a moment to psych himself up. She turned her attention to the school. In the distance, a little brunette girl was spinning around in circles, swatting a handsome black boy with her pigtails. Young love, Zoe thought with a chuckle. "Chris?"

"Huh?" He turned off his video game and shoved it into his bag.

"I'll be back to pick you up at three o'clock, okay?"

"Sure." He slung his bag over his shoulder and pulled open the car door. "Miss Zoe?"

Zoe smiled. It was the first time he had addressed her by her name. "You can just call me Zoe, okay?"

"Zoe," he repeated. "Thanks for taking me."

Zoe couldn't believe her ears. It was the nicest thing she had ever heard from Christopher Eastham. "Good luck."

"You're right," Chris said with a sigh. He slid out of the car and lingered around for a few seconds. "I hate school."

"I'm sure you'll do fine. Would you like a hug goodbye? A kiss on the cheek? I just applied some lip gloss, so--"

"Ugh. Noooo!" Chris sprinted away from the car, fearful she might force the hug on him. "G'bye!"

"Bye, hon." She kept her eyes on Chris as long as she could, until he disappeared into a sea of kids wearing the same school uniform. When he was gone, she heaved an enormous sigh. How many times had she and Kyle talked about having children? How many times had she truly convinced herself that he was "the one?" She couldn't believe how much time she had wasted on him, only to be let down.

Never again, she told herself. Even if I'm single forever, I refuse to let another man break my heart.

* * *

When Zoe got back from the school, she headed to the game room, which happened to have the best and most accessible television in the house. Unfortunately, the game room was already occupied. Ben was in the game room with his two numbskull friends, and there was a buxom blonde girl sitting on his lap.

"Well, if it isn't the nanny!" red-haired James leapt to his feet as soon as she entered the room. "How have you been, love?"

"Um..." Tongue-tied Zoe couldn't tear her eyes away from the blonde on Ben's lap. The girl was coiling her fingers through his hair, and he didn't seem to mind. So much for thinking he liked ME, Zoe thought.

"Elle..." Ben whispered to the blonde. He tried to shift her off of his lap, but she wouldn't move.

"Hi!" the blonde greeted her. She had chewing gum in her mouth, and she was smacking her lips as she chomped on it. Her shoulder length hair was so light and bright, it could appropriately be described as platinum. Almost two inches of dark roots were growing out of her scalp, a telltale sign of her natural color. "You must be Zoe?" The blonde held out her hand, but she didn't move from Ben's lap. "I'm Ellen."

"Uh... hi." When Zoe took the girl's hand, she had to take it carefully, because Ellen had several obnoxious cocktail rings on her fingers, and a few of them looked dangerous.

"Elllllleeen," James repeated, hanging onto both syllables of her name much longer than necessary. "Since when did you start going by Ellen?"

"You can call me Elle." As she spoke, Zoe could see flashes of the chewing gum wad as it rolled around in her mouth. "Or Elly." Ellen leaned back and nestled her head against Ben's shoulder. Zoe didn't expect to get irritated by the sight of him getting cozy with another woman, but she could feel the heat of vexation creeping into her cheeks.

Zoe had to ask. "And you and Ben are--?"

"Exes," Ellen explained. "Occasionally with benefits."

"Oh."

"I think that would fall under the category of too much information, Elle," said Jordan, who had been silent until then. "It's nice to see you again, Zoe. Would you like to join us?"

"What are you guys up to?" Zoe asked. She glanced at the television, but they didn't appear to be watching anything in particular. She also stole a glimpse of Ben, but he wasn't making eye contact. In fact, he appeared to be hanging his head in shame.

"We were going to head off to a pub in a little bit," Jordan explained. "You're welcome to join us, if you'd like."

"All four of you are going?" Zoe's gaze was peripherally fixated on Ellen, who was whispering something into Ben's ear.

James strode over to Zoe and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Yeah, love. All four of us. You're welcome to come as my date."

"I'll... pass," Zoe said. "But thanks."

"Awwww." James, who still had his arm around her, gave her a little squeeze. "I'm not such a bad sort, once you get to know me. Jordan can attest to that."

"Oh, it's not you," Zoe elaborated. "I mean... I'm just going to pass on the pub altogether."

"How 'bout a date some other time then?"

Zoe closed her eyes for a few seconds as she fought off a groan. What was the deal with British boys and their persistence?

"Leave her alone, Jamie!" Ellen hollered at him. "She's obviously NOT interested!"

James pouted. "You're not?"

For a few seconds, Zoe made eye contact with Ben, who had yet to utter a single word. What was going through his head right now? Since Ellen's heaping cleavage was less than an inch from his face, Zoe had a pretty good guess.

"Maybe she fancies Jordan?" Ellen suggested with a grin.

Jordan perked up. "What makes you say that?"

"I don't know." Ellen shrugged. "I just figured someone had to fancy you one of these days!"

"Loads of women fancy me!" Jordan claimed. "You're just not around to see it!"

"Well, you know who I fancy!" Ellen started caressing Ben's hair, which made Zoe wonder how her rings weren't getting tangled up in it. "Isn't he adorable?"

"Oh, he's adorable alright!" James said, chuckling. "I don't even like standing next to him. Just look at him! He makes me look bad."

Ben picked up one of the couch pillows and lobbed it at James. It bounced off of James' head and went careening toward Zoe, who caught it in mid-air.

"Hey... no throwing things!" James chided him. "I'm being serious! You're a fine specimen of man, Benny. If I was a woman, I'd shag you."

"Aww. Do you want to shag him, James?" Ellen teased. "I didn't know you fancied lads."

"I don't!"

Zoe, who was starting to feel a bit out of place, started inching toward the door. "Well... you guys have fun at the pub. I'll see you later." She tossed the pillow to James and reached for the doorknob.

"Zoe!" Ben shouted. He started to rise from the couch, but Ellen was clinging to his neck, digging into his nape with her ridiculously long fingernails. Extracting her from his lap was going to take some effort. "Zoe, wait!"

Zoe left the game room and hurried back to her bedroom.

"Zoe!" The next time Ben shouted her name, he had closed the gap between them. He was sprinting down the hall, eager to catch up to her. "Zoe, I need to talk to you."

She stopped but she didn't turn around. "What?"

Ben grabbed her shoulders and gently spun her in his direction. "You aren't angry with me, are you?"

"Angry?" Zoe laughed, as if to show him how preposterous his question was. "Why would I be angry?"

"You know... because of Elle?"

"And why would I be angry because of Elle?" Zoe played dumb. She didn't want to give Ben even the slightest reason to believe she was interested in him.

Because she wasn't interested in him.

Was she?

"Actually, Ben, I'm impressed."

"Impressed?" he repeated. "Why?"

"Because you have a different girl on your lap every time I see you," Zoe said. "Seriously... that's really impressive."

He felt her sarcasm like a slap to the face. "Oh... Zoe. I don't want you to think I'm some kind of womanizer."

"And you obviously have a thing for blondes," Zoe went on. "Really fake blondes, might I add."

"No I don't. I actually like brunettes!" His gaze flickered to Zoe's head, to her chocolate brown hair. "In fact, my next girlfriend will definitely be a brunette!"

"Maybe I should give her a warning. What's her name?" Zoe asked with a chuckle. "Oh, I'm just teasing you, Ben. Go have fun with your friends. I'll see you later."

"Zoe..." When she pulled away from him, he tried to cling to her arm as long as he could. "I'm not seeing Elle anymore. And her friends with benefits claim? That's total rubbish!"

"Oh, is it?" Zoe started heading down the hallway again, and Ben stayed on her heels.

"I'm really sorry."

"Why are you sorry?"

"Because of Ellen!" Ben exclaimed. "I don't want you to think... we're not... I'm not..."

"Trust me, Ben..." Zoe continued down the hallway, faster than ever, "you do not owe me an apology!"

Chapter Eleven

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Have you ever dreamed about riding off into the sunset on the back of a horse? Trust me, sunset or no sunset, it's not as great as it looks.

As soon as he was out of the school, Chris was accosted by Walter and his mates. He had hoped to make it to the car before they found him, but he had no such luck.

"Oi! Turn around then!" Walter hollered. Chris couldn't see who was shouting at him, but he would recognize that Geordie accent anywhere. He had heard that voice plenty of times in his nightmares. "You're not getting away that easy! Turn around!"

Chris turned on his heel, facing Walter's direction. If he didn't make it easy on them, he knew they would make it a lot harder on him. Walter and his two cronies weren't much older than Chris, maybe nine or ten. But Walter, in particular, had the bearing of an older boy. With his height and breadth, he could have easily stood up to a teenager. "You ain't gonna piss yerself this time, are ya?"

Chris hung his head in shame. Why didn't they pick on someone else for once? "No."

"Good. We didn't want another encounter with Chris the Piss," Walter said, and his two friends snickered. "Well... go on then, Chrissy. Turn out your pockets!"

Chris didn't look up. He kept his eyes on the ground--wishing, hoping someone would come to his aid. When he finally opened his mouth, he answered with another resolute, "No."

"Did I hear you?" Walter cupped a hand behind his ear and leaned forward. One of his mates, whose name Chris didn't remember, picked up a stone and pitched it in Chris' direction. The sharp rock bounced off his shoulder and skidded across the ground. "Did you just tell me no?"

"I... I did," Chris admitted. Deep down, he knew he was a fool for standing up to Walter, because he knew it would end the same way it always did. "Piss off."

"Did Chris the Piss just tell me to piss off?!" Walter roared. As he took a step in Chris' direction, he popped his knuckles. "You better change that attitude, or you'll be eating the dirt!"

Chris knew it wasn't an empty threat, because Walter had crushed his face against the ground more times than he could count. He had punched him, stomped him, kicked him--he had experienced all sorts of pain on Walter's behalf. Sighing, Chris dipped his hands into the pockets of his trousers and turned them inside out. When he did, a five pound note fluttered to the ground. Walter stepped forward and picked it up.

"Thanks. That wuddint so hard, wazzit?" Walter pocketed the money, but he wasn't finished with him yet. He buried his fist in Chris' stomach, which made the smaller boy crumble to his knees. "Have a nice day then!"

Walter and his cohorts roared with laughter as they went on their way.

* * *

Chris tossed his rucksack into the backseat and climbed into the car next to Zoe. He clutched his stomach, where Walter had hit him, knowing he would have a bruise.

Chris wished he could confide in the nanny, but it wasn't in his nature to confide in anyone. He wanted to tell her he had no friends, that he would have given anything in the world to have just one. He wanted to tell her about Walter and his friends bullying him--that they bullied him last year too. He wanted to tell her about how they stole the fiver that was crumpled up in his pocket.

More than anything, he wanted to tell her how much he hated his parents. Sometimes, when they argued, we went into the bathroom and threw his body against the wall, because hurting himself on the outside made him hurt less on the inside.

But he couldn't tell her any of these things because she didn't really care about him. She was paid to care about him. It was her job.

"How was your day?" Zoe asked. She thought she saw the sparkle of a tear in his eye, but it might have been her imagination.

"Fine." Chris turned his attention to the window, where his peers were scooting and scattering away.

"How do you like your teacher?" Zoe asked. "Or... do you have multiple teachers? I don't really know how it works in the UK."

"Fine," Chris repeated. He didn't want to have to deal with the nanny's barrage of questions. He had enough on his mind and he didn't need her probing him for details.

"Do you need a tissue?" she asked, because she noticed his nose was running. When Chris had to hold back tears, his nose had a tendency to leak.

So he wiped his nose with his sleeve, which was good enough for him.

"Okay then..." His nanny started the car and sped away from the school, away from Walter and his bad memories. "How about we go celebrate you surviving your first day of school? Do you want to go do something fun?"

Chris shrugged. "Not really." He just wanted to go home and bury himself in a mountain of video games.

"Do you want to get a snack or something?"

"No."

"Not even some ice cream?" Zoe offered. "Come on... everyone likes ice cream!"

"No, thanks." Chris turned away and crossed his arms. As he stared out the window, his nose started dripping more than ever. By the time they were home, his sleeve was sopping wet.

Zoe felt like she had tried everything she could possibly try with the boy. No matter what she did, she was met with single-word answers and an impossibly cold shoulder. She wished, more than she had ever wished for anything, that she could have a breakthrough with the boy. There had to be more to him than a puckered nose, contempt, and video games.

More times than she could count, Zoe had been tempted to pack up her things and go back home. Being unemployed in America had to be better than being uncomfortable in Britain. She wished she had never left. She wished she could go back to her friends and family, because her heart ached for familiarity. She even missed Kyle. Sometimes.

And really, uncomfortable didn't even begin to describe her feelings. Gemma treated her like a slave; like an ugly stepsister in a Cinderella story. And "ugly" she most certainly was, especially on the inside. Lewis, despite the fact that he was her employer--and married--never stopped hitting on her. And she didn't even want to spare a thought for Ben, who had turned out to be a constant source of disappointment, just like every other man in her life.

As soon as the car stopped, Chris threw open the door and raced toward the house. "I'm going to the game room!" he declared.

"O-okay..." She looked toward the backseat of the car, where Chris had deposited his backpack. In the unlikely event that he had some homework, she would have to return it to him later.

When Zoe got out of the car, she thought she heard horse hooves, and she wondered if she was losing her mind. Then she spotted Ben in the distance, riding toward her on horseback. Horseback?! For a moment, she wondered if she had stepped into a time warp. He was even dressed a bit like a Victorian hero, in a button-down white shirt, black trousers, and calf-high brown boots. The only thing he was missing was a pair of overlong sideburns, then he would look like the Mr. Darcy of her dreams.

"Mr. Bingley is more like it," she whispered a correction.

As he approached, Ben dismounted his horse like it was second nature. He grabbed his horse's bridle and made his way toward her. His tousled blonde hair was adorably windswept, and the sun made his brown eyes glow like amber. "Zoe." His greeting was cool and impersonal.

"Ben." She kept her eyes on his horse. It had been a long time since she had seen an equine up close and personal. It was a huge animal, strong and powerful, with almond-shaped eyes and a meticulously groomed mane. "Where did you find your friend?"

"The horse?" he asked with a chuckle, patting the animal on the nose. "Didn't you know? The stable's over there." He pointed behind the mansion house, at a large, fenced-off structure.

She didn't know why she was surprised to discover the Easthams had horses, since they were obviously loaded. "And you just... decided to go for a ride?"

"Yeah. Why not?" Ben started running his fingers through the horse's mane, a gesture that had her feeling a bit envious. She wondered what it would be like to have his fingers in her hair. "I won't be here much longer, so I thought I'd live it up while I can."

"Wait... what do you mean?"

"I won't have horses where I'm going, that's for sure," Ben continued. "I'm looking for a place in London. I can't live off of my brother's welfare forever, can I?"

"I... oh." Zoe didn't know what else to say. She was strangely disheartened by the idea of Ben's potential exodus. "When are you leaving?"

"I'm not sure. It depends on several different factors."

"Oh. Okay." She kept her gaze on the horse, because she didn't want him to see the disappointment in her eyes. "So, does the horse have a name?"

"Rass Berry," he said. It was an appropriate name. The horse had a unique auburn coloring, not unlike a raspberry. "But I just call him Rassy for short."

"Rassy," she repeated. "Do you go riding a lot?"

"Not often enough."

When Ben started stroking the animal's neck, Zoe couldn't tear her eyes away from his fingers. He had beautiful, masculine hands, and impossibly long fingers. His hands were so large, she could imagine him engulfing her entire head in the palm of his hand.

"So, how was your trip to the pub? Did you have a good time with, uh..." Zoe paused for a moment, pretending to forget the girl's name. "Elly?"

Ben's eyes twinkled with delight. A few seconds later, he accused, "You're jealous, aren't you?"

"What?!"

"You're jealous of Elly," Ben insisted. "I can spot female jealousy from a mile away!"

Zoe made eye contact with the horse and shook her head, as if the animal could somehow relate to her frustration. "Why in the world would I be jealous of her? She was kind of--" Trashy. That's what she wanted to say, but she didn't want to be rude.

"A chav?" Ben finished.

"A chav? What the hell is a chav?"

"Oh. Right. I keep forgetting you're an American," Ben said. "A chav is a... well, it's a bit difficult to explain. You'll have to Google it."

"Okaaay. Anyway, you didn't answer my question. Why would I be jealous of her?!"

"Because she was with me," Ben said, "and you secretly want me. I can see it all over your face."

"Riiiight. Okay. You keep telling yourself that, Ben, if it makes you sleep better at night," Zoe said with a roll of her eyes. There was, of course, some truth in what he was saying. Deep down--deep, deep down--she might have had a secret desire for him. But that certainly didn't mean she was jealous of Elly.

Or was she?

"Did you want to sit in my lap, Zo?" Ben thrust a long finger in the direction of a bench. "We can go over there, if you'd like."

"What?! Why would you think I want to sit in your lap?!" Zoe exclaimed. "Seriously, Ben, this needs to stop. Okay? You can't keep flirting with me like this! I work for your brother, and I'm way, way too old for you."

"I disagree," Ben said, sighing. "But... no matter. To answer your question, yes. We did have a wonderful time at the pub. You should have come."

"Maybe next time."

"How is Chris? Was his first day of school everything he hoped it would be?"

Zoe sneered. "I don't think anyone's first day of school is ever that great. In fact, he seemed kind of depressed."

"Really?" Ben gave the horse's head a brisk scratch. "What's an eight-year-old got to be depressed about?"

"I have no idea. Do you think you could get him to open up to you? He sure won't open up to me!"

Ben started stroking Rassy's mane again, and her inexplicable feeling of envy started creeping back in. She wanted Ben to stroke her hair. She wanted to sit on Ben's lap. She--

In an attempt to derail that train of thought, Zoe swatted herself on the head. Which, of course, made her look like she was going mad.

"Are you alright?" Ben asked.

"Uh... yeah."

"Why did you just hit yourself?"

"A bug," she said. "I think there was a bug."

"Really? I didn't see any bugs."

"I heard it buzzing," she insisted. "Anyway, we were talking about Chris. Do you think you could pull him aside and talk to him? You'd be a good big brother type. I think he admires you."

"And why on earth would anyone admire me?"

Because you're handsome and fun and charming and young and--

"I have no idea," she answered.

"Alright. I'll have a chat with him," Ben said. "In the meantime, would you like to go for a ride with me?"

"A... ride?" Her eyes slid back to the horse. "You don't mean--"

"On the horse," Ben finished. "Have you ever ridden a horse before?"

"Uh... no." Zoe started inching away from Ben and Rassy, hoping to purge that ridiculous notion from his mind. "I'll see you later, Ben. I've got things I need to do, so--"

Ben mounted the horse with such ease, he put her in mind of a storybook knight. When he was in the saddle, he extended a hand toward Zoe. "Come on. It'll be fun."

"I highly doubt that."

"Come on, Zoe!" He flicked his fingers on the extended hand, motioning for her to come closer. "Live a little. Do something you've never done before. Don't you want to go riding off into the sunset with a handsome gentleman?"

"Where's the sunset?" Zoe twirled around, pretending to look for his sunset. "Where's the handsome gentleman?"

"Awww." Ben pouted. "You really don't think I'm handsome? Not even a little bit?"

"Oh, you're handsome enough... but I don't know about you being a gentleman."

"I'm a perfect gentleman!" he claimed. "Come on. Ride with me! I promise I'll keep you safe. I'll have my arms around you the entire time."

Tempted by the prospect of having his arms wrapped around her, Zoe stepped forward. Against her better judgment, she reached for his hand, and when she did, he pulled her onto the horse. He held her on his lap, as if she were riding sidesaddle, and he kept his arms around her waist.

"This is nice and cozy, isn't it?" Ben asked with a smirk. "Tell me you're not enjoying yourself."

"I'm not enjoying myself," she semi-lied. When Ben coaxed the horse into a trot, it became a full-fledged lie. When the horse started moving, she let out a shriek. "Oh god... don't go so fast!"

Ben laughed. "This isn't fast! This is what we would call a trot."

"It seems fast," Zoe observed. "Isn't there another speed? One called molasses or something?"

Ben pulled her closer and gave her a squeeze. "Calm down, Zoe. Do you always have to be so..."

"So... what?" she pressed.

"So tense," he finished. "You just need to relax. Let someone else take care of you. I promise I won't let anything bad happen to you."

"You mean I'm not going to fall off the horse and break my neck?"

Ben chuckled. "No! Of course not!"

So she finally allowed herself to relax in his arms. And when she did, she had to admit--

It felt nice.

Chapter Twelve

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Do you know what's embarrassing? Since I've been here, I think I've seen Jerry Springer on three different channels. It's no wonder they have a derogatory opinion of Americans! At least we have the Jeremy Kyle show to even the odds a bit. Fortunately, Americans aren't the only ones in the world who don't know their baby daddies.

Zoe couldn't sleep. Her insomnia couldn't have come on a worse night, because when she had insomnia, it usually meant she would wander the halls. On this night, she wandered into more than she bargained for.

Zoe started her journey in the kitchen, where she foraged for a midnight snack. She leaned against the wall, nibbling on an apple cinnamon muffin, and that's when she heard the shouting.

"STUPID G--"

"--STROUS TART!"

She popped her head out of the kitchen and tried to eavesdrop. It seemed she was making a habit of eavesdropping, but it wasn't her fault. Gemma and Lewis made it too tempting, and far too easy. They were having a row, and made no attempt to hide it.

But the action was happening at the other end of the hallway, so it was impossible to make out what they were saying, even though they were screaming at each other. Zoe gobbled the rest of her muffin and tiptoed down the hallway, toward the source of the argument.

The first thing Zoe heard was the sound of breaking glass. Gemma must have thrown something, possibly a vase, at her husband.

"You're trying to kill me now, are you?" Lewis screamed. "You've gone mad!"

"I SHOULD kill you!" Gemma shouted. "It would be the least you deserve! Do you really have to flirt with everything with a cunt?! You're horrible to me!"

"Gemma! Gemma... calm down! You'll wake Chris!"

"As if I care!" the wife squealed. "He should know his father is a cheating arsehole! How many times have you cheated on me, Lewis?! How many!?"

"Oh, as if you haven't cheated on me!"

"That was five years ago!"

Zoe couldn't believe her ears. It was like an episode of the Jeremy Kyle show as unfolding in front of her, right on the other side of the door! She felt like she had hit the jackpot--which would have been a wicked thought, if not for the fact that Gemma was a despicable human being, and Lewis was hardly her favorite person in the world.

"How long are you going to lord that over me?" Gemma shrieked. "You've cheated on me HOW many times since then?"

"Only twice!" Lewis declared. "I am NOT cheating on you with the nanny!"

Zoe's mouth dropped open, and her heart missed a few beats. She hadn't expected to creep into the conversation. Did Gemma truly think she was having an affair with her husband? Zoe had half a mind to storm into the room and support Lewis' claim, but if she did that, they would obviously know she was spying on them and she couldn't have that.

"Bollocks!" Gemma shouted. "I see the way you look at her!"

"I might LOOK, but that doesn't mean I'm cheating!"

"I know why you hired her... unqualified American twat!"

Zoe only heard part of what Gemma had said, but she had heard enough! Unqualified? Twat? Her fists were involuntarily clenching at her sides, and the blood in her veins was boiling. She wasn't even attracted to Lewis! Where did Gemma get such crazy ideas?

"For once, I just wish you would appreciate me!" Lewis shouted. "Appreciate everything I've given you!"

"And what exactly have you given me, Lewis? Genital warts from one of your whores?!"

Zoe winced. Genital warts?! It was more information than she ever wanted to know.

"I hate you!" It was Gemma again. "You bastard!"

"If you hate me so much, why don't you LEAVE!"

"Oh, you want me to leave, do you?!"

"I do! If you left, you'd be doing a favor for everyone who lives here! You're mental, Gemma! You're an unhinged, lazy, useless, heartless CUNT!"

Once again, Zoe heard the sound of breaking glass. She thought she heard Lewis squeal, which could only mean Gemma didn't take kindly to his insult.

"You just want to be alone with your slut!" Gemma shrieked. "I hope you die, Lewis! I really do!"

"Great! Because that's exactly how I feel about you!"

"If there is any justice in the world, YOU'LL die first... so I can piss on your grave!"

Zoe thought she heard someone stomping toward the door. Not wanting to get caught, Zoe opened the door to the nearest room and ran inside. It happened to be a bathroom, and it happened to be occupied. Chris was standing in front of a mirror. He wasn't wearing a shirt, his eyes were red-rimmed with tears, and he had bruises all over his little body. At least some of the bruises must have been self-inflicted, because she caught him in the act of punching himself.

"Chris!" Zoe shrieked. She grabbed the boy's shoulders and spun him around to face her. He had an enormous bruise, purple and brown and blue, on his stomach. "What are you doing?!"

"None of your business!" he wailed. "Go away!" Tears were racing down his cheeks, dripping down his neck.

"Are you hitting yourself?!"

"No." But she knew it was a lie, because he was punching his arm when she entered.

Zoe wanted to take him in her arms and hold him, but she knew the affection wouldn't be welcome. The poor boy was more troubled than she realized, and his parents were the obvious culprit. "Honey... don't hurt yourself. It's not worth it."

"Shut up!" He tried to shove her out of the bathroom, but she was much bigger than him, and impossible to move.

"Where did you get that?" she pointed at the bruise on his stomach.

"Shut up!" Chris yelled. He had a set of lungs on him that would give his parents a run for their money. "Shut up, shut up, shut up!"

"Chris..." Zoe laid a hand on his head, on his sloppy hair. "I care about you, and I don't want you hurting yourself. I'm just trying to help you."

"Why would care about me?! I'm not even nice to you!"

His words surprised her. At least he was right about one thing--he wasn't nice to her.

"You only care about me because you're paid to care!" Chris turned around, because it was easier to cry to his reflection in the mirror. "Nobody cares about me!"

"Oh Chris... that isn't true."

"It is!" He leaned forward, watching the tears drip from his eyes. "And don't try to tell me my parents care, because I know they don't!"

"Your Uncle Ben cares about you."

"No he doesn't..."

"And I'm not paid to care about you..." Zoe protested. "If your dad fired me tomorrow, I would still care about you."

"He's not going to sack you. He fancies you."

Zoe sneered. She wondered if Gemma had been telling him that, or if he'd gathered that information from his parents' foul-mouthed feuds.

"Why don't I take you back to bed? We can talk tomorrow..." Zoe laid a hand on his back and nudged him toward the door. "Do you have a shirt?"

"No."

"You never told me how you got that bruise on your stomach."

"No," he repeated. "And I'm not gonna." As they stepped through the doorway and headed down the hall, they were silent for several seconds. When they were back in his bedroom, Chris said, "My mum's going to leave, you know."

"I--" Zoe didn't know what to say. She was just the nanny, and she hadn't been here for very long. She felt like a stranger intruding on their domestic disputes. "We don't know that for sure..."

"She is leaving," Chris insisted. "You heard it, didn't you? They're going to get a divorce."

"Well..." As she watched Chris scramble into bed, she was truly at a loss for words.

"But it's alright," Chris said with a shrug. "Maybe it's for the best." He tugged the blankets to his chin, and Zoe went to tuck him in. To her surprise, he didn't protest. He didn't even complain when she leaned down and kissed him on the forehead.

"You're really not going to tell me where you got those bruises?"

Chris shook his head.

"Alright... then I won't nag you." Zoe capsized. "But if you did that to yourself, please, please don't do it anymore!"

Without another word, Chris rolled over, which left Zoe no choice but to back out of the room. As soon as she closed the door, she spotted Lewis heading down the hallway in her direction. "Great," she whispered to herself. "Now I'm really not going to be able to sleep tonight."

"Zoe." If she had hoped to avoid a confrontation, it was already too late. "You're still awake?"

"Y-yeah. I couldn't sleep." When she started heading down the hall, she assumed Lewis would follow her--which he did. If Chris was really trying to sleep, she didn't think they should carry on a conversation right outside his door. "You know, this might not be the best time to say this, but I'm worried about Chris. I think he might be hurting himself. I just ran into him, and he had all these bruises and--"

"Gemma is leaving me," Lewis said, completely ignoring her concerns about his son.

"Oh..." Zoe weakly feigned surprise. "I'm sorry to hear that. Are you... okay?"

"Of course I'm okay!" Lewis exclaimed. "I'm glad to be rid of her... the bitch."

"Oh. Uh... wow." How else was she supposed to respond to something like that? "Well, I'm glad to hear you're handling it well. Did you hear what I said about Chris?"

"She really is a cold, heartless, selfish woman. She never gives a thought to anyone but herself," Lewis went on. "These last few years, she's really made my life a living hell. I know you haven't been here very long, but... be honest with me. Didn't she make your life difficult?"

"She never liked me," Zoe admitted. "And I don't know why. I'm pretty sure I didn't give her a reason to dislike me."

"Oh, it's not just you. Gemma hates everyone. I really do believe she's mental. I think she needs counseling... a heavy dose of pills..."

Chris might need counseling too. That's what Zoe wanted to say, but she kept it to herself, since Lewis had shown no interest in talking about his son. "Well... it's late. I better get back to my room."

"Zoe." Before she could move an inch, Lewis grabbed her arm. "Wait. I want to talk to you."

"About what?"

"Now that Gemma's leaving... now that we're officially separated..." Lewis leaned closer to Zoe and whispered in her ear. "We should go out sometime."

Was he serious? His wife hadn't even finished packing up her belongings, and he was already asking her out? At times like this, she could almost understand Gemma's point of view.

Almost.

"I... better get back to my room, Mr. Eastham," Zoe said, pleased at herself for calling him Mr. Eastham. Perhaps the added formality would put him in his place. "I'll see you tomorrow."

She tried to tug her arm from his grasp, but he was holding on too tightly. "You know I think you're gorgeous, don't you?"

"I... thanks." I really need to quit this job, Zoe's conscience screamed. "Now... do you think you could let go of me? I need to get some sleep."

Lewis heaved a tremendous sigh as he released her arm. "Goodnight, Zoe."

"Goodnight."

She sprinted down the hallway as fast as her legs could carry her, and she didn't look back.

Chapter Thirteen

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

When I was at home, I used to watch a lot of BBC America. I was a total Anglophile, obsessed with British culture. But something happened once I got here. Now I find myself flipping around the channels, desperately searching for a North American accent. An American, a Canadian, anything!!!

The next morning, Gemma was truly gone. The telly was no longer blasting Hollyoaks and Eastenders, and Zoe was no longer her servant. It was, for once, completely and totally quiet in the Eastham house. Chris was at school, Lewis was at work, and Benjamin was off doing god-knows-what. For the first time since her arrival, she was blissfully alone.

She lay on the game room sofa, eyes closed, enjoying the silence. At that moment, nothing had ever sounded sweeter than the sound of pure, unadulterated silence, apart from the cheerful chirping of the birds outside the window. For the first time in a long time, she was totally relaxed.

Her peace didn't last long; it was soon destroyed by the sound of a roaring motorcycle on the lawn. Motorcycle? Zoe got up and went to the window, only to discover it wasn't quite the motorcycle she had in mind. A man in a helmet was zipping down the driveway in a Vespa. When he reached the end of the driveway, he turned around and started racing in circles.

"Is that..." Zoe leaned closer to the window, tapping the pane with her finger. "Ben?!"

Zoe ran outside, hoping to catch him before he departed. When he saw her running down the driveway, he stopped the Vespa and pulled off his helmet. His eyes danced with excitement at the thought of being caught with his toy.

"Zoe," he casually greeted her. "Do you like my new ride?" He patted the Vespa.

"It's... interesting."

"I went to Italy once... it was a few years ago. I went on a little cross-country European voyage with some of my friends," Ben explained. "Everyone in Rome had one of these, and I guess I fell in love."

"You never cease to surprise me," Zoe said with a chuckle. "First a horse, now this."

"Would you like to join me? I'll give you my helmet."

Zoe took a step backward. He was not going to talk her into this one! "Noooo thanks. You go ahead and keep enjoying yourself."

"Please?" He pouted at her like a child. Zoe was sure his adorable, pitiful, boyish face probably got him far with the ladies--but it wasn't going to work on her! "It would be so much more fun if I had a girl on my back."

"No."

"No?"

"No!" She was adamant this time.

"Are you sure?" Ben rose from the Vespa, took a step toward her, and plopped the helmet onto her head. "But you look so adorable like that! The helmet looks better on you than it does on me, that's for sure."

Zoe started to take off the helmet, but he fastened it beneath her chin. "You're really spoiled, aren't you?" she accused him.

"Huh?"

"You're used to getting your way? I can tell."

"You're right. I am terribly, horribly, despicably spoiled, and I refuse to take no for an answer." Ben slipped his arms around Zoe and lifted her a couple of inches off the ground. Despite her shriek of protest, he carried her toward the Vespa. "You'll come with me, won't you?"

"Uhhh..."

"Uhhh is better than no," Ben observed. "In fact, I would say uhh is practically a yes." He climbed onto the Vespa and motioned for her to sit behind him. "Get on."

"But I've never ridden a motorcycle before..."

"Is a Vespa a motorcycle? I think it's technically a scooter." Ben started bobbing up and down like an over-excited little boy. "Come on, or I'm liable to drive off without you."

"Go right ahead."

"Alright then. Your loss."

He drove the Vespa a few feet down the driveway. When Zoe saw him go, she shouted, "WAIT!"

He stopped, turned around, and grinned at her. "Changed your mind?"

"I... guess." Zoe was starting to wonder if Ben could talk her into anything. "You're a really bad influence on me, you know."

"I'm a good influence on you, you just don't know it yet." As she mounted the back of the Vespa, Ben's grin never left his face. It was a grin of victory. "Hold on tight, alright?"

Zoe wrapped her arms around Ben's body, which was surprisingly broad, and squeezed him as tightly as she could. Yesterday, he held onto her. Today, she was holding onto him. How did she keep ending up in situations that required involuntary cuddles? "Alright... go."

As Ben drove the Vespa down the remaining length of the driveway, Zoe squinted her eyes as tightly as she could. Then he went speeding down the road, much faster than necessary. So much for easing her in!

When Zoe finally opened her eyes, they were several blocks away from the house, on a road that was lined with hedges. She laid her cheek against Ben's back, if only to block out some of the whizzing scenery. As they sped along, she started to relax a bit, and her mind started to wander. The first thing she noticed was that there was no sidewalk, which made her wonder what a poor pedestrian was supposed to do.

"Ben?" she shouted his name, hoping he would hear her over the Vespa's buzzing.

"What is it?"

"Where are we going?!"

"It's a surprise," he teased her.

"Okay, but you better have me back in a few hours!" she yelled at him over his shoulder. "I need to be back in time to pick up Chris from school!"

"Don't worry your little head, love. I'll have you back."

Several minutes later, they rode into a town that was as quintessentially English as she could have possibly imagined. They rode over a stony, tree-lined bridge, down a road flanked by medieval houses. When she spotted a half-timbered cottage with a charming thatched roof, she had to smile. "Where are we?" she asked.

As they approached their destination, Ben slowed the Vespa. "Dorchester-on-Thames. Look." He pointed at an impressive old church. "There's the abbey over there."

"Neat." Her underwhelming choice of word was hardly enough to describe her inner awe.

"I think it's been around since the 1100's," he said. "And I think it was built on top of a Saxon cathedral."

"Aww. How cute are you right now?" Zoe teased him. "You're like a tour guide!"

"I try my best. Anyway..." He brought the Vespa to a stop outside of a pub called The Winged Wench. "Here we are."

"And where is here?"

"One of my favorite pubs." Ben got up and helped her off of the Vespa. "It's about time you had some proper English food."

"You mean Walkers crisps and Chicago Town pizza don't count?"

"No," he chuckled. "No, they don't."

"You're not going to make me eat pie and mash, are you? You might get me on the back of a Vespa, but there is NO way you're going to get me to eat pie and mash. Or black pudding."

"What about my dream of taking you all the way to Scotland for some haggis?" Ben joked.

"Nope. Not gonna happen."

"Damn." Ben took her by the hand and led her into the pub. Once they were inside, she felt like she had stepped back into the Middle Ages, into some kind of bawdy tavern. "Can I treat you to an ale?"

"If you're expecting me to eat with you, you better be treating me to everything. I didn't bring my purse."

"Of course. A gentleman always pays," Ben said, "especially when he's out on a date." Before she could protest, Ben winked at her, then he went to the counter to get some ales. Zoe sat at a table at the far end of the room, though she was a bit reluctant to do so. She was feeling more out of her element than ever.

When he returned, Ben was carrying two ales, and he wagged a menu in front of her face. She took the menu and browsed through it, sneering at some of the culinary options. "Glazed Goat Cheese..." she read aloud. "Bangers and mash. Rarebit. I'm not even sure what rarebit is. Is it rabbit?"

Ben laughed. "No. Not quite. It's basically cheese on toast."

"Oh. Okaaay." Zoe kept browsing the menu, but nothing was jumping out at her as something she would actually like to consume. "I dunno. What do your recommend?"

"Well, seeing as you're a yank, we better start you off slow." Ben prodded the menu with his finger, and when she saw what he was pointing at, she breathed a sigh of relief. "You can't really go wrong with fish and chips."

"Sounds good to me."

After they ordered their food, Zoe decided it was time to try her ale. She sipped a bit of the foamy brim, and when she did, her face puckered. When Ben saw her reaction, he chuckled yet again.

"You don't like it?"

"Ummm..." She didn't want to hurt his feelings. "Let's put it this way. I don't really care for any alcohol."

"You don't?!"

"Nope."

"Hmph. Then what fun are you?" Ben took a giant gulp of his ale, leaving no doubt that their opinions were varied. "I'm teasing, by the way. I think you're great fun."

"Yeah, right."

"No. I'm serious. I think you're a riot, Zoe," Ben said. "I don't think I've been out with a girl who's made me laugh quite as much."

"If I'm making you laugh, it's probably unintentional. I'm not that funny," Zoe insisted. "Trust me."

Two girls in their late teens entered the pub, and when they did, their eyes were immediately drawn to Ben. As good-looking as he was, Zoe was sure he drew stares everywhere he went. And she had no idea why he was wasting his time with her.

"Those girls were looking at you."

"Were they?" Ben stole a glimpse of them over his mug of ale.

"Yeah. They were totally checking you out. Maybe you should go talk to them?"

Ben raised an eyebrow. "Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"No. Not at all!" Zoe threw up her hands in defense. "But they might be a bit more... age appropriate for you."

Ben's grin disappeared, and he raked a hand across his lips. The next time he spoke, he asked, "My age really bothers you, doesn't it?"

"No. It doesn't bother me," Zoe said. "I mean, we're friends, right?"

"Just friends?"

"Well..." Zoe glanced around the room, hoping a change of subject would spring to mind.

Nothing did.

"So... if I was to ask you out on another date, I take it you would decline?"

"Another date?" Zoe repeated, alerted by his choice of word.

"Yeah. I was hoping this could be our first date," Ben said. "Apparently not."

They were drawn into a moment of silence, during which their fish and chips arrived. Zoe tore off a piece of her fish, and when she did, her fingers were soaked in grease.

"Wow." She wiped her hands, leaving a slick grease trail on her napkin. "This is seriously greasy."

"But it's good, isn't it?"

"Yeah." She nodded. "It is."

Then the subject turned awkward again. "So what is it that you don't like about me?" Ben leaned forward in his chair, toward Zoe. "I'm no stranger to rejection. It's not like I expect every woman to fall at my feet, and it's not like I think I'm perfect, but I really like you. And every time you reject me, it kills me."

Zoe kept gnawing on her fish. She didn't quite know what to say.

"You don't think I'm attractive?" he asked.

"Oh, please." Zoe rolled her eyes. "You know you're cute, Ben."

"You think I'm too young, and you can't get past it?"

"Well..." His age was a bit of a deterrent, she had to admit. "You are really young."

"But what does it matter?" Ben asked, having completely abandoned his food. "It's hard to find chemistry with someone, especially chemistry like ours. Once you have it, you need to take it however it comes!"

"You think we have chemistry?"

"I do!" Ben held her hand. "I really, really do. I've never been drawn to someone like I'm drawn to you."

Zoe caught herself smirking a bit. She had never had someone as gorgeous as him pining for her before. As much as she hated to admit it, she enjoyed flirting with him.

"I'm not going to give up," Ben insisted. "You know how I am... I don't like to take no for an answer. I'm persistent. If you're not attracted to me in the least, then so be it... tell me now. But if you are attracted to me, even a little bit, then it will happen, mark my words. I won't give up."

"But I--"

"So you should save us both some time, Zoe," he went on. "Just throw yourself into my arms right now, and we can skip to the good bits." He held his arms open, as if expecting her to fly into them. But she didn't. "No?"

"Ben..."

He crossed his arms over his chest and turned his attention back to his food. "Very well. I'll just have to try harder."

"Ben!"

"Hmm?" He shoved a giant piece of beer-battered fish into his mouth.

"It's not that I don't find you attractive, and it's not your age..." Zoe said. "It's just that... I got out of a bad relationship recently."

With his mouth full, he shrieked. "Wha--?!" As soon as he finished swallowing, he asked, "I thought you were engaged?!"

"I... was," Zoe confessed. "We broke up right before I came here. I'm sorry I lied." Ben just shook his head with disbelief, so she continued. "It was... a bad experience. We were supposed to get married in three weeks, but I found out he'd been cheating on me."

"Cheated on you..." Ben repeated quietly. "Who in their right mind would cheat on you?"

"Kyle, apparently. He was cheating on me with his ex-girlfriend. I don't know how long it had been going on, but one time was bad enough for me. I called off our wedding... and I left." Zoe shrugged. "I guess I just needed to escape. And honestly, I'm in no hurry to get back in another relationship."

Ben reached over and grabbed her hand, which she wished he hadn't done, since her fingers were covered in fish grease. "I would never cheat on you, Zoe. Never."

Zoe's mind was clouded by images of various blonde girls sitting on Ben's lap. Somehow, he just didn't strike her as a model of fidelity. "Anyway, Ben, I've been thinking about going home soon... back to the US. So that's another reason why we shouldn't date."

His eyes were as pitiful as anything she had ever seen. "Maybe I... could give you a reason to stay?"

"I really shouldn't," she insisted. "I feel like I've ruined your brother's marriage... for reasons unbeknownst to me. And Chris doesn't like me, so..." An image of Chris' bruises flashed before her eyes. "By the way, I'm concerned about Chris. I think his parents' relationship has really been bothering him."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I found him in the bathroom the other day, punching himself."

Ben's eyes were lit with alarm. "Are you serious?!"

"Yeah. I'm serious. And I tried to talk to Lewis about it, but he wasn't paying any attention to me." Zoe shrugged. "Do you think you could have a word with him? With your brother and with Chris? He seems to like you more than anyone."

"Of course. I'll have a chat with him." Ben, who had somehow finished his food in the middle of their conversation, reached over Zoe's arm and pilfered a few of her chips. "Well, Zoe, if you ever change your mind, you know I'd love to go out with you."

Zoe frowned. He sounded so casual now, as if he'd lost all his passion. "I'll keep that in mind."

Then she caught him eyeing the two girls who were staring at him before, which made her think he had already moved on.

Chapter Fourteen

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

You'll have to forgive my moment of unbridled elation. I just realized they have Papa John's pizza here!

By the time she finished her fourth slice, Zoe had to lean back on the couch and unbutton her jeans. She clutched her stomach, which was a bit poofy after she gorged herself on pizza.

Chris and Ben were sitting on either side of her. Somehow, they were still eating. Ben pulled off a pepperoni and held it to her mouth. She turned her head away and groaned.

"Ooof!" Zoe started rubbing on her stomach. "I am STUFFED!"

"You're right..." Ben leaned toward her and tapped her earlobe. "I think I see a bit of stuff and fluff coming out of your ear."

She smacked his hand away. "No, seriously! I haven't been this full in a long time! I feel like I've been impregnated by pizza!"

Chris toppled to his side, giggling, and Zoe was impressed with herself. It was the first time she heard him laugh.

"If you're impregnated by pizza, who's the father? Papa John?" Ben asked, his brown eyes twinkling with mischief.

"Uh-huh. That's my dirty secret," Zoe said. "I'm having his calzone."

Chris didn't stop laughing. He had even abandoned his video game controller, which was a small miracle.

"Well, if you ever feel like cheating on him, you should try Papa Ben's. We have some of the best sausage in the world."

Zoe planted her fist in his arm. "Ben!"

"Ow!" He gripped his arm where she punched him. "Why did I get punched?! I'm only talking about pizza!"

"Suuure you are!" She grabbed the last pizza box and peered inside. "Do you guys want any more of this?"

"Uh... yes!" Ben snatched the pizza box from her hands and claimed one of the remaining slices. "I'm still eating!"

"Ben!" Chris held up his game controller, which looked like a wheel. Zoe now knew the correct term for it was a "wiimote," since Chris had taken it upon himself to school her on the subject of video games. "I wanted you to play Mario Kart with me!"

"Too bad. Still eating." Ben held up his pizza slice. "Why don't you ask Zoe to play with you?"

Zoe shot Ben the most heated look she could muster. She hadn't played a video game in years, and she most certainly hadn't played one where the controller was shaped like a wheel! "Ben!" she snarled his name.

"Zoe?" Chris held out one of his wheel controllers. "Do you want to play?"

"Ummm..." She made a mental note to kill Ben. "Uh, sure. But you'll have to teach me how to play."

"It's easy," Ben said. "It's just like driving, really."

"Somehow I doubt that," Zoe sighed, and the next thing she knew, they were on the character selection screen. Chris picked a turtle in a bullet car, and Zoe chose a giant gorilla.

"Donkey Kong!" Chris started cackling with laughter again. "I don't know if you want to do that!"

"Why not? He looks tough!"

Zoe didn't know if it was the character she picked, but her driving was ridiculously unwieldy. They were playing against online players, whose brutality was unlike anything she had ever seen. She finished in last place three times in a row, which Chris seemed to think was hilarious, because he was rolling around with laughter.

If this was what it took to get on his good side, it was definitely worth the humiliation!

"Do you want to keep Donkey Kong... or do you want to change characters?" Chris asked.

"Oh, I'm keeping my Donkey Kong!" Zoe exclaimed, though she barely had any idea what she was talking about. "And you're going down!"

Chris did, indeed, go down. She used her character's bulky body to knock Chris off of "Rainbow Road." At least he was a good sport about it; he had tears of laughter in his eyes.

When she managed to finish the race in fifth place, Zoe got up and did a victory dance.

"Woo hoo!' she cheered for herself. She wiggled her butt in front of Ben's face, which had his eyes transfixed. "I beat some people!"

"But not me!" Chris pointed out. "I finished in second place!"

"Well... you're awesome, Chris. What can I say?" When she sat back down on the couch, she almost sat on Ben's lap. She flashed him an embarrassed look and quickly scooted away. "Ben, you want to play?"

"Sure." Ben, who had finished his pizza, took the wiimote from Zoe's hands. "Now you can watch a master at work."

And Ben wasn't exaggerating. Zoe watched him win race after race, and he didn't seem to care about how badly he was creaming his nephew. But Chris was no slouch. He performed admirably, never falling below fourth place.

When they all had their fill of game time, Chris turned off the telly (a word that Zoe was getting used to hearing) and tossed the wiimotes on the floor. Then Chris did something incredibly unexpected.

He gave Zoe a hug.

He even kept his arms around her while he said, "Goodnight, Zoe."

"Goodnight." Zoe had tears in her eyes as she patted him on the back. "I had fun."

Chris puckered his nose at her. "Did you?!"

"I did! But I learned my lesson. Next time... no Donkey Kong!" When Chris snickered at her, she ruffled his hair.

"G'night, Uncle Ben," Chris said.

"Goodnight, Christopholus."

"Christopholus?!" Zoe repeated. "That's an interesting nickname!"

Chris waved to them as he bounced out of the game room, more lively than she had ever seen him. If she had known the way to his heart was through his video games, she would have started playing a long time ago.

"Maybe you need an interesting nickname," Ben suggested.

"Maybe YOU need an interesting nickname!" Zoe threw back at him. She reached over and knocked on his head. "How about Numbskull?"

"Heeey! That's not very nice!" Ben tried to disarm her with one of his pitiful pouts.

"Who said I was nice?"

"Oh, you're nice alright! Nice arse, nice breasts, nice--"

"At least you didn't call them tits," Zoe interrupted. "Everyone says tits here in the UK. I swear, everything's so vulgar here. It's always tits this, cunt that."

Ben threw back his head, laughing harder than she had ever heard him laugh. When he regained control of himself, he said, "I prefer fanny myself."

"Fanny? Isn't that slang for butt?"

"Uhh... no. That's what you Americans seem to think, but... no."

"What does fanny mean then?"

"I'm sure you can figure it out," Ben said. "There are only a few naughty bits on a woman's body, so..."

"Geez. How many slang words do you have for that?" Zoe asked with a roll of her eyes.

"Minge."

"Is that another one?!"

"Uh-huh. And twat."

"Good god! It never ends!" Zoe shook her head with disbelief. It was an awkward discussion, so she didn't dare to make eye contact. There was something profoundly discomfiting about discussing female genitalia with an extraordinarily good-looking guy. "I really need to brush up on my British slang."

"Did you ever figure out what a chav was?"

Zoe shrugged. "Nope!"

Without a word of warning, Ben grabbed Zoe's waist and pulled her onto his lap. He expected her to struggle, but when she didn't, he kept his arms around her.

Resting his forehead against her cheek, Ben whispered, "I want you."

"Ben..."

"Give me a chance," he begged her. "Give me a chance to prove you wrong. I know we'd be good together."

Zoe laid her head on his shoulder, a pleasant surprise for Ben. In the face of so much persistence, how long could she hold out? She was starting to feel her reservations slipping away. "Did you..." The words were caught in her constricting throat.

"Did I... what?"

"Did you still want that date?" Zoe finished.

"Do you even need to ask?" When he started spinning his finger around a lock of her hair, Zoe closed her eyes. She never thought she would actually be considering a date with Ben. As much as she hated the term, she supposed she could officially be called a cougar. "Where would you want me to take you?"

"I don't know. Anywhere." Zoe shrugged. "Someplace with food would be good."

"Well... that narrows it down a bit." Ben started sifting a hand through her hair, which looked like chocolate silk. He expected her to flee at any second, to leap from his lap and end the dream. But she stayed. "Zoe, I--"

Before he could finish his sentence, the door opened, and Lewis came inside. When he caught her sitting on his brother's lap, Zoe could have sworn she saw steam coming out of his ears. "What is this?!" Lewis shrieked.

Zoe jumped off of Ben's lap so fast, it was as if her rear end was on fire.

"Ben... you're absolutely ridiculous! Can you not keep your cock in your trousers for one minute?! The only girl in the house, and you have to have her!"

Zoe couldn't believe she got caught lap-sitting her boss' brother. She felt like she was getting chastised, like a high schooler caught in a hallway embrace. "I'm sorry, Lewis. I--"

"No, you don't have to apologize, Zoe," Lewis went on. "I know it's my brother. I know he's the pursuer in this situation. He's been hitting on you, hasn't he? He won't leave you alone?"

Zoe studied Ben's reaction in the corner of her eye. She wanted to say something, to defend him, but she couldn't bring herself to do it.

"You're right, Lewis," Ben admitted. "I haven't been able to leave Zoe alone... because I'm absolutely besotted with her. "

Lewis held open the door as he glowered at Ben. "Get out!" he hissed.

Ben got up, stormed over to Lewis, and stared him directly in the eye. Zoe couldn't remember the last time she saw two obscenely tall men facing off. They looked like they were about to come to blows with one another--what was she supposed to do?

"What's wrong, Lewis?" Ben asked with a snort. "Are you getting a little bit jealous?"

"Get out," Lewis repeated, standing his ground. "Get out of this house!"

"You're throwing me out?!"

"Yes! Yes, I am! Pack your things and leave!"

"Lewis! Wait!" Zoe cried out. She wanted to get his attention, to get him to see reason, but the brothers were too engrossed in each other to spare her a glance.

"You're really tossing out your own brother?" Ben whimpered. "Where am I supposed to go?!"

"I don't know. It's not my problem. You have friends in London, don't you? Maybe one of them won't mind having a sponge." Lewis motioned toward the door. "Go on."

"Lewis, you can't do this!" Zoe tried again, but it was clear her opinion wasn't going to sway him.

When Ben looked back at Zoe, his eyes were apologetic. Was this it? Ben was going to get kicked out, she would never see him again, and they would never get to go on their date? It was a sad end to a tale that hadn't yet begun.

"I'll call you..." Ben whispered to her, "text you..."

Lewis seized his brother by the shoulder and guided him through the door. When Ben was in the hallway, Lewis closed the door, which meant he had Zoe all to himself.

"I hate him. I truly do. I'm embarrassed to call him my brother." Lewis raked a hand through his already-wild hair. "Did he hurt you?"

"What? No!" Zoe laughed at the question. "Are you serious? I like Ben! He would never hurt me, and I don't think you should throw him out..."

"Well, as this isn't your house, I hardly think you have any say in the matter." He turned his back to her. "And you should get to bed. I can't take Chris to school tomorrow. You'll have to wake up early to do it."

When Lewis left the game room, she thought she heard him whispering to Ben in the hallway, but she couldn't make out what they were saying. Now, more than ever, she was tempted to quit this job. Did she really need it? Wasn't it making her miserable?

And she might have quit, if not for the fact that she thought she had a breakthrough with Chris. Whether he knew it or not, the boy needed her. And there was no way she could leave him.

Chapter Fifteen

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

If you don't think I'm old, then consider this: when I was in high school, there was no such thing as texting!

Ben was true to his word. He left two days ago, and he had been texting her ever since. However, Zoe hadn't heard from him in several hours, and though it pained her to admit it, she was missing him. So she reached for her phone.

To Ben: The house feels empty without you

Until now, their texts had been short, friendly, and to the point. But this text was too passionate and personal, so she deleted it. Instead, she wrote--

To Ben: I haven't heard from you in awhile. What are you up to?

Zoe lay in bed, clutching her phone in her hand, eagerly awaiting his reply. It usually didn't take him too long to get back to her, and this time was no different. Less than sixty seconds later, she had her reply.

To Zoe: got a new flat in London. r u busy?

To Ben: You already got a new place? omg, that was fast! Where is it located?

She didn't know one London borough from the next, but she liked to pretend she did.

To Zoe: camden. a mate is helping me move in. r u busy?

A mate? Zoe's first thought was that she hoped it was a male companion, not a female companion. Now that Ben was away, she couldn't keep her eye on him anymore. For all she knew, he could have hooked up with a new girl by now.

"You're being stupid, Zoe..." she whispered to herself. "It's not like you're his girlfriend. He can do whatever he wants."

To Ben: Sorry I missed your question. No, I'm not busy. I have the weekend off. I'm just hanging out here at the house. Lewis is driving me crazy!

To Zoe: u have the WHOLE weekend?

To Ben: Yep

Zoe laughed at the brevity of her text, but she didn't really have anything else to say. She had no reason for texting Ben, she just didn't want to lose contact with him. No matter how many times he told her he liked her, she felt insignificant. A guy like Ben, who had everything going for him, probably had women lining up at his door. If she didn't make herself accessible, she knew it wouldn't take him long to move on.

To Zoe: alright. dont go anywhere. im coming to get you.

When she read his message, Zoe's phone almost slipped out of her hands. She punched a reply as quickly as she could.

To Ben: Excuse me, WHAT???

His reply was instantaneous. He must have had a better phone than her, because it took her forever to type a few short words.

To Zoe: pack for the weekend. im coming to get u and im bringing u to london. pack light cuz im bringing the vespa.

Zoe started eyeing her purse, wondering if she could squeeze in enough stuff to last an entire weekend. She was a bit annoyed that Ben didn't ask her if she wanted to come to London, so she texted him back.

To Ben: You're taking me to London, just like that? Don't I have any say in the matter? Where am I going to stay?

To Zoe: youll stay with me. coming to get you now. im driving so won't be able to text. ill be there in a little over an hour.

Zoe didn't want to protest too much, because spending time with Ben in London was a welcome respite. She traveled around her bedroom, choosing only the most essential items, which she threw into her purse. She needed underwear--the sexy kind, in case anything unlikely happened. Deodorant was a must. Since she rarely wore makeup, she didn't need anything but a bit of concealer. A hairbrush, toothbrush. Zoe even managed to squeeze her pajamas into her purse, right next to her passport and wallet.

When she had packed everything she needed to pack, Zoe said goodbye to Chris. She prayed she could avoid Lewis, who was the last person she wanted to see, assuming Kyle wasn't on the list. Then she sat on the bench in front of the house and waited for Ben to arrive. How long did he say it would take? An hour? Zoe mentally rebuked herself for being too eager to see him again.

She checked her watch every few minutes. 12:35. 12:37. 12:41. How silly was she, counting down the minutes until Ben's arrival? While she waited, she pulled out a ponytail holder and swept her hair into a super-sloppy bun. She had learned her lesson the hard way: long hair and Vespas didn't mix.

When she finally heard the whirr of the Vespa, she felt her heart leap in her chest. Zoe! her mind was screaming at her. You're acting like a teenager! It's just Ben! Don't get so excited!

He stopped the bike halfway up the driveway, tore off his helmet, and held out his arms. "Zoe!" he shouted to her. "I've missed you. Haven't you missed me? Come... fly into my arms!"

Zoe got up, but she didn't do any flying. Laying a hand on her hip, she swaggered toward him, trying to look as underwhelmed as she possibly could. He didn't need to know she was counting the minutes, or that her heart skipped a beat when she saw his face. He didn't need to know she did miss him, much more than she ever missed Kyle. He was a golden blonde Apollo, even more handsome than she remembered.

"Hi," she greeted him, cool and casual.

"What, no hug? No lover's embrace?"

"I'll hug you, but I don't know if I'd call it a lover's embrace." Zoe's gaze was drawn back to the house, where she thought she saw a curtain flutter. "On second thought, Lewis might be spying on us. We should probably save the hugging for later."

"But I will get a hug?"

"Sure." She mounted the Vespa and wrapped her arms around his waist. He turned around and dropped the helmet onto her head. "Don't you need a helmet?"

"I'd rather protect you and your lovely little skull," Ben said. "Isn't that chivalrous of me? By the way, you're in for a long ride. It's quite a ways to London."

"Over an hour," she noted. As she had been checking her watch every few minutes, she knew it took him exactly one hour and fourteen minutes to get to her.

"I'm taking you on a date, by the way." He turned the Vespa around and started speeding off to London. And speeding was the optimal word, because he had to be going much faster than any reasonable speed limit would allow.

"Oh, are you?"

"Yes. You accepted a date, remember? And I'm holding you to it! You can't talk your way out of this one!"

"Why would I talk my way out of it? I wanted to go out with you."

"Do you?! That's a dramatic improvement, wouldn't you say? Last week, you would have nothing to do with me!"

As they rode, Zoe laid her cheek against his back. She liked having her arms around him, but there was no way she was going to tell him that. She closed her eyes and inhaled, breathing in the smell of musky cologne and aftershave.

With her chin on his shoulder, she asked, "Do you know how lucky I am... getting to wrap my arms around you like this?

"I know!" Ben responded sarcastically. "I keep trying to tell you how lucky you are, but you won't believe me!"

"Maybe you're the lucky one!" Zoe suggested. "You get to have me cuddling you the entire time!"

"You don't need to remind me." Ben turned around, but not too much, because he needed to keep his eyes on the road. "I already know how lucky I am."

Zoe could tell when they were getting closer to London because the traffic was more and more dense. Not one to be kept waiting, Ben made his own lane between the rows of cars.

As he weaved down the middle of the road, Zoe shrieked at him. "Ben! What are you doing?!"

"Don't panic, Zoe! It's lane splitting... everyone in London does this!"

She could have kept protesting, if not for the fact that weaving between the cars made the trip a whole lot quicker. He took her on a ride through Piccadilly Circus, past a dizzying swirl of lights and billboards. When they nearly collided with a pedestrian, Zoe's breath was caught in her chest.

"BE CAREFUL, Ben!" she yelled at him. "You're going to get us killed!"

"I'm always careful!" he insisted.

"Yeah... sure! You almost hit a guy!"

"It's the bloke's fault! He wasn't paying attention!"

Zoe simultaneously shook her head and rolled her eyes. In times like this, she felt like Ben was showing his age. Recklessness was usually a trademark of youth, and Benjamin Eastham was no exception.

Ben parked the Vespa near Hyde Park. When Zoe whipped off her helmet, he had to bite his lip to keep himself from laughing. Several pieces of hair had escaped from her bun, and the wisps made her look like Medusa. All the color in her face had relocated to her cheeks, and her eyes were glassy and panicked.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

"Considering the fact that you almost gave me a PANIC ATTACK, I think I'm okay," she said. "Where are we?"

"Hyde Park. I'm taking you to Kensington Palace. There's a little place where we can have tea and biscuits."

In her best British accent, Zoe said, "Oh! Tea and crumpets like a proper English gent! Cheerio!"

Ben chuckled at her overly posh impersonation. "I hope that wasn't an impression of me." He took her by the hand and led her into the park.

"I bet I look like crap after that long ride."

"Not quite like crap," he said. If she was fishing for compliments, she wasn't going to get any from Ben. English people, Zoe had noticed, had a tendency to be scathingly honest. "If you're crap, you're adorable crap."

"Adorable crap?!"

"You've got hair sticking up all over the place," he admitted, flitting his fingers across her fly-away strands. "You look a bit like Medusa."

"Great," she responded sarcastically. "Then we're like Apollo and Medusa, out for a weekend stroll."

"You think I'm like Apollo?"

"The thought crossed my mind," she confessed, remembering the image of him when he first arrived. Why wasn't his hair a mess?! When the wind tousled Ben's hair, it only made him look more gorgeous. How was that possible? "You know you're good-looking."

"I do?"

"I'm sure you do."

As they traveled through the park, they passed a bronze statue of Peter Pan, where a couple of tourists were posing and taking pictures. Then they passed an old couple, who Ben pointed at and said, "That'll be us some day."

"Except I'll be ten years older than you," she noted.

Ben grinned a bit, surprised that she didn't completely shoot down the idea. "By the time we're that old, those years won't matter as much. We'll both be old as piss."

She swatted him on the head. "Geez! That's not nice! You Brits and your candor... I swear to god!"

"You'll probably have to wipe my arse when I'm that old. You think you'll be okay with that?"

"No. I don't think I'd ever be okay with that."

"Aww." He laid his head on her shoulder. "That's my Zoe. Always a sweetheart."

When the red brick of Kensington Palace came into view, Zoe asked, "Didn't Queen Victoria live here?"

"That's probably something I should know, but I honestly have no idea."

Ben reached for her hand, and he was a bit surprised she didn't pull away. Hand-in-hand, they took a self-guided tour of the palace, walking in the footsteps of Queen Victoria. In one of the galleries, a dress worn by Princess Diana was on display. After touring the palace, Ben led her out to the Orangery, an impressive little conservatory that served sandwiches and snacks.

Ben handed her a menu, which she browsed with some reluctance. After her experience in The Winged Wench, Zoe learned to approach English food with caution.

"I want a scone," she announced.

"Ever tried clotted cream?"

Zoe shook her head. "Uh... no. What's so clotted about it?"

Ben chuckled. "It's cream, it's thick, and it's quite good. But we should probably get you some jam, just in case."

They ordered tea, jam and scones, and it was starting to feel like a proper afternoon in Britain. Ben showed her the proper way to make tea, which apparently involved milk and a tiny amount of sugar. Zoe bravely slathered her scone in clotted cream, and she was surprised to discover that she liked it. Something called "clotted cream" had to be terrible for her health, so she was glad her mom wasn't around to give her a lecture.

"So, Ben..." Zoe smacked her lips, licking off a bit of jam. "You've been pretty persistent about wanting to date me. What is it that you like about me? I don't think I'm anything special. But you? You're..."

When she didn't finish, his curiosity was piqued. "I'm... what?"

Zoe shrugged. "You know. You're hot, smart, charming. You went to Oxford, and it looks like you come from a rich family. You've obviously got a lot going for you."

Ben smiled in appreciation of her compliments. "Thanks. But I don't think I'm anything special."

Zoe tried to feed him a bite of her scone, which was covered in clotted cream. He took a bite, but he had a bit of cream on his lip, so she wiped it with a napkin. "How do you like clotted cream, by the way?" he asked.

"I like it. But, uh... aren't you changing the subject?" She wagged an accusatory finger at him "I think you only like me because you want to bag the obligatory older woman. It's probably a right of passage for every guy under twenty-five. Am I right?"

"Nooo!" Ben protested. "I haven't even taken your age into consideration. It obviously doesn't bother me as much as it bothers you... silly girl. And to answer your question, there are many things I like about you. You're clever, fun, sweet, you're good with children. You challenge me to be a better person. Not to mention, you're absolutely gorgeous. What's not to like about you?" He nudged her with his elbow. "I even like the fact that you're American."

Zoe clasped a hand over her heart and gasped. "Even that? Surely not!"

"You'd be surprised at how many British boys fancy American women. It's the truth." And with that, he devoured his last bit of scone. "Are you ready to go?"

"Yep."

They paid their bill and headed back to the Vespa. Ben made her wear the helmet, and Zoe didn't protest this time because she knew what a reckless driver he was. Ben took them to Camden Town, the location of his new flat.

As soon as they got there, Zoe had to ask, "So... the friend who helped you move in... was it a guy friend or a girl friend?"

"A bloke," Ben assured her. "It's good to know you're concerned about my relationship status."

"I'm not!" she protested. "I was just... curious."

"Right. Sure." He took her hand and led her up to his apartment, a sparsely furnished one-room studio. He had a queen-sized mattress, a leather sofa, a moderately-sized television, and little else. There were boxes piled up in one corner of the room, which was to be expected since he had just moved in. Zoe thought she smelled cinnamon, which she almost asked him about, then she spotted an enormous red candle on the room's only coffee table. It was refreshing to find a bachelor who wanted to keep his domicile smelling relatively decent.

"So, am I really going to stay here the entire weekend?"

"That's the plan, yes." Ben stood in the center of the room with his hands on his hips. "I know it could benefit from some sprucing up, but I just moved in. What can you expect?"

"It's... nice."

"You sound disappointed."

"Well, there's only one bed," she pointed out the obvious.

"So there is. But don't worry. I was planning on sleeping on the sofa."

Zoe thought of all the movies she'd seen, and all the books she had read, where the hero and heroine were faced with the impossible situation of sharing a room--and a single bed. The situation usually resulted in the heroine insisting they could share the bed, that they could be adults about the situation--or some such nonsense. Zoe wasn't going to say that. If he was willing to sleep on the sofa, she was going to let him.

Ben collapsed on the couch and patted his knee. "Come here. Come sit on my lap. Two days ago, we were getting quite cozy until Lewis had to show up and ruin the moment. I think we should pick up where we left off."

For some reason, Zoe was feeling particularly pliable. He didn't need to ask twice. She was on his lap in a flash. "Well," she announced. "I'm here. What are you going to do now?"

Ben tapped her on the nose a few times. "My dream girl," he whispered.

"You really think I'm your dream girl? Isn't that kind of an exaggeration?"

"No. You really are." Ben cupped her cheek in the palm of his hand. The hand glided across the curve of her neck, down to her shoulder. Every touch made her skin tingle like crazy.

"I never thought you'd do it," she said.

"Do what?"

"Get me to like you."

Ben's hand returned to her cheek. He leaned forward, closing in on her mouth, waiting for her to protest. When she didn't, his mouth caught her in a kiss. His tongue darted out, tasting her moist lips. Zoe moaned into his mouth. Was she really letting this happen? She didn't see any reason to stop him, because kissing Ben was the most sensual thing she had ever experienced. He ran his fingertips along her jaw as he kissed her, and she thought she could feel electricity in his fingers.

She couldn't let him go any further. As soon as the kiss ended, she jumped from his lap and rushed over to the mattress. When she was brave enough to steal a glimpse of Ben, he was adorably dazed.

"Zoeeee!" he whined, holding out his arms to her. "Come back to meeee!"

Zoe didn't oblige. She sat down on the mattress, picked up the blankets, and gave them a sniff. "Are these clean?" she asked.

"The blankets? Of course they are!" He was pouting, not because of the blankets, but because she had vacated his lap in such a hurry. He wanted--no, needed--to have her in his arms.

"You haven't been wanking under them, have you?"

Ben snickered at the question. "No! And it seems you've been brushing up on your British slang, haven't you?"

Zoe slipped under the blankets and pulled them to her chin. They were soft, but not as soft as Ben's lips. If her conscience wasn't screaming at her, she would have liked to kiss him again and again. "Oh please, Ben," she said with a roll of her eyes. "Everyone knows what wanking means!"

"They do?" Under his breath, he added, "Well, I guess that's what I'll be doing tonight..."

Chapter Sixteen

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

You know what's awkward? Spending a weekend with a guy and you know he wants to shag you.

Wait, did I just write "shag?" I think I can safely say I've been here too long!

When Zoe got back from her weekend jaunt in London, the first thing she did was check on Chris. She noticed that he took down his "KEEP OUT" sign. Did that mean she was welcome to visit him now?

He put down his Nintendo DS as soon as he saw her come in. "Zoe!" his eyes lit up. "You're back!"

Zoe sat at the end of his bed. She found his foot beneath the covers and gave it a little squeeze. "So I am! How have you been?"

He shrugged. "Awight, I guess. Did you get to see Big Ben?"

"Not this time," Zoe said. Why was Ben's penis the first thing that came to mind when she heard him say Big Ben? She had never seen that Big Ben, but she was sure she could if she wanted to. "When's the last time you've been to London?"

"'Bout six months ago. My mum took me to see The Lion King on my birthday."

"Well cool! That sounds like fun." Zoe gave him another pat on the foot. "I missed you, you know."

Chris sneered at her for a few seconds, as if he was skeptical. Finally, he said, "I missed you too."

It was her turn to be surprised. "Did you?!"

"Kind of."

Zoe smiled. Kind of wasn't exactly a yes, but she would take it!

"I missed you more than I've missed my mum," Chris admitted, which surprised her even more. "But that doesn't mean I want to give you a hug or anything."

"What if I want to give you a hug?"

"Ummm..." Chris tilted his head as he considered her offer. "Well... I guess it'd be alright."

As Zoe bent down and captured him in her arms, she couldn't help but be impressed with the progress they had made. He didn't even raise a fuss when she kissed him on the forehead.

"Zoe?"

"Yes?"

"You know those bruises on my stomach?"

How could she forget? She had been worrying about him ever since she set eyes on them. "Of course."

"It's not just 'cuz I was hitting myself," Chris confessed. "Sometimes... I get bullied."

"Bullied?!"

"Yeah." He broke eye contact and started fidgeting with the frayed end of his blanket. "By a boy called Walter and his mates. He punched me in the stomach and took my five pounds."

"Does this happen all the time?!" Zoe asked. She was already wondering if she could get in contact with Walter's parents and give them a piece of her mind.

"No... not really," Chris said with a shrug. "I mean, it's only happened once this year. But it's not the first time they've come after me."

Zoe unzipped her purse, which was she still carrying with her, and pulled out a ten pound note. She grabbed Chris' hand and shoved the bill into his palm. "Here," she said. "That should make up for those stupid bullies taking your money."

"Thanks." He sat up and laid the ten pound note on his nightstand. "My dad's a cheapskate. He doesn't give me anything."

"When does this happen, Chris? The bullying?"

"After school," he replied. "Please don't say anything to anyone. I'd never live it down."

"But I--"

"Please!" Chris pleaded. "Please don't say anything, especially not to my dad. I don't want anyone to know about it. I already have a hard time at school. No one likes me. I don't have any friends."

"I'm your friend." Zoe reached over and gave his hair a ruffle.

"So you won't say anything?" Chris asked, sticking to his guns. "If people find out I've been whining about getting punched, I'd look like a poof!"

As much as she wanted to find this Walter and give him a taste of his own medicine, Chris trusted her enough to tell her his secret, and she didn't want to betray his trust. "It's... okay. I won't say anything. But when I pick you up from school tomorrow, I'll have my eye out for Walter."

"Fair enough." Chris started to slide under the blankets, but then he sat up again. His eyes lit up like he'd had an epiphany. "Hey, do you want to play Mario Kart?"

"Umm..."

When he heard her hesitate, Chris' shoulders fell. "I knew you wouldn't want to..."

"Wait! I do!" Zoe exclaimed. "I do, actually. Do you want to go play right now?"

After Chris' nodded, Zoe took him by the arm and headed into the game room, where they played Mario Kart for two hours straight. This time, she listened to Chris' advice on which characters to pick and which ones not to pick. Donkey Kong, in Chris' opinion, was for more experienced players, and since Zoe certainly wasn't experienced, she decided to stick to the ones Chris recommended. She did see some improvement in her gaming skills at the end of two hours.

When game time was over, she sent him off to bed and sat in the game room for awhile. Her mind wandered to Ben, as it often did. Most of the time, she thought she was crazy for indulging in a--what was it? It wasn't quite a relationship, but it seemed to be heading that way. And she certainly did miss him, now that he was gone.

"Zoe." At first, she thought it was Ben's voice, because they sounded awfully similar. Then she looked up and saw Lewis and was crestfallen.

"Hi," she greeted him as politely as possible.

"You're up late," he noted. "And it's a Sunday night."

"Yeah. I guess so."

"You have to take Chris to school tomorrow. You didn't forget, did you?"

"I know. I'm sorry."

"Oh, there's no need to apologize." Lewis stood behind the couch, which meant his pelvis was directly behind her head. It was making her a bit uncomfortable, to say the least. "But you really shouldn't keep Chris up so late when he's got school the next day."

"Oh." Zoe checked her watch. It was a little after midnight, and she had sent Chris to bed about fifteen minutes ago. "Geez, I'm really sorry. I guess time just got away from me."

"It's alright." Lewis laid a hand on the couch, right next to her shoulder. "Just don't do it again. His regular bedtime is--"

"Ten o'clock. I know. I'm sorry."

"You don't have to keep apologizing." Lewis' fingers brushed against her shoulder, against her bra strap. "I'm not as much of a stickler as Gemma was. Aren't you glad she's gone? I know I am."

"I don't know if Chris is so happy about it."

"Well, he'll learn to live with it," Lewis said with a chuckle. "Actually, Gemma's been wanting him to come live with her. Which would be a tragedy, really. He's obviously better off with me."

"What would happen to me... if he went to live with Gemma?"

Zoe's question made his eyebrows raise. "I have no idea. I guess we'll worry about that when it happens, won't we? By the way..." His fingers kept caressing her shoulder, so Zoe got up. When she did, Lewis' eyes were drawn to her thighs, which were exposed by her pajama shorts. He was so transfixed by the sight of her legs, he completely lost track of what he was saying. Zoe realized what he was staring at, so she tugged down her shorts a bit.

"Were you going to say something?" she asked.

"Oh yes. Of course..." Lewis faked a smile. "How was your date with my brother? I assume it went quite well, considering the fact that you were gone the entire weekend..."

"It wasn't a date."

"It wasn't? Something tells me Benjamin would have a slightly different perspective on that. But then again..." Lewis scratched his stubble-covered chin. "He doesn't like to take anything seriously, so maybe you're right."

"What do you mean by that? It was just a date. It wasn't like we--"

"Oh, so it WAS a date?" Lewis challenged her.

"No. We're just friends. It's--"

Lewis took a few steps in her direction, and his hand was back on her shoulder again. He gave her a squeeze, which was meant to be reassuring, but it made her skin crawl. "It's okay, Zoe. If you like my brother, I won't hold it against you. I'd rather you like me, of course, but since you'd made it clear that you don't..." As he shook his head, his hand slid away from her shoulder. "Honestly, why won't you even go out with me for a cup of coffee?"

"Uh... Lewis?"

"Yes?"

"I better get to bed." She was already inching toward the door. "Goodnight?"

"I'm sorry if I've made you uncomfortable. Really, it's the last thing I would want to do," Lewis insisted. "It's just that... you fascinate me, and if you think I'm being unprofessional then just--"

"Goodnight," Zoe repeated. She opened the door and slipped into the hallway.

"Goodnight."

When she was out of the room, Lewis ran to the door and peered out into the hallway. With the door open, he could stare at Zoe's bum as she made her way back to her bedroom.

"And what a lovely bum it is," he whispered to himself, his lips drawing into a slightly devious grin.

Chapter Seventeen

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, and I really believe that might be true. Come to think of it, though, I haven't been missing my mom too much. Is that bad?

Clinkle clinkle.

That sound meant she had just received a text. And even though Zoe was getting familiar with the sound, it still made her jump. She was so engrossed in her BBC drama, even the smallest noise would have shocked her out of her skin.

It was from Ben, of course.

To Zoe: hello there, beautiful. what r u doin?

Zoe kept an eye on the television as she punched a reply.

To Ben: I'm watching a show on BBC. What are you doing?

To Zoe: i auditioned for a bbc drama once. i didnt get the part, as you might have guessed. it turns out i'm a shit actor. rite now i'm trying to find a job.

The characters on the screen were embracing each other as they reunited in the rain. Real life just didn't measure up to that, Zoe realized with a sigh.

To Ben: Oh really? And how's that going?

To Zoe: not too good yet. at this rate, i might end up on the dole.

Zoe didn't respond to his text for a few minutes because she was intent on finishing her movie. It was so moving, she almost had to reach for a tissue. Why couldn't guys in real life be more like guys in the movies?

"Because women probably wrote the scripts," Zoe said with a chuckle. She grabbed her "mobile" and finally got back to replying, even though she didn't understand what he was trying to say. There were many times she didn't quite understand what British people were trying to say, but she tried her best.

To Ben: The dole? What does that mean?

To Zoe: i thnk the american equivalent would be unemployment? welfare?

Now that her show was done, he had her undivided attention. She flicked off the telly and laid on the couch, her phone hovering inches above her nose.

To Ben: Oh. I had no idea what you meant. I don't know if this is true in Britain, but in the US, Dole is a brand of fruit. I thought "on the dole" was British slang for, "I'm so broke I'm only going to be able to eat bananas from here on out."

When she reread the word "banana," Zoe was shocked to realize she was reading it the British way. In her head, she heard "bah nah nah" and it made her want to clobber herself with a pillow.

To Ben: I guess I still suck at British slang.

To Zoe: rotflmao!! you're killing me!

To Ben: I hope I don't kill you! You're too cute to kill! :-)

To Zoe: ^_^

Zoe rolled her eyes when she received his smiley text. Were they really so bored that they had taken to sending each other smiley faces?

To Zoe: really i'm not so broke. im ashamed to admit, at my age, that i still get money from my father. and i still have my savings from when i was working during school, so...

* * *

Ben winced as soon as he sent her his last text. The last thing he wanted was for Zoe to think he was spoiled and irresponsible. He wanted her to see him as an adult, with his own flat, taking responsibility for his own life. His youth seemed to bother her, so he needed to impress her.

Getting money from Daddy was hardly impressive.

To Ben: You come from a rich family, don't you?

To Zoe: dunno if id say that. were fairly well off i suppose

When she didn't reply for quite some time, he was starting to fear he might be losing her. He needed to think of an interesting topic, something to recapture her interest.

To Zoe: I've been missing you.

He made a point to use perfect capitalization and punctuation, hoping that would impress her too. She seemed to be a stickler for that sort of thing.

To Ben: Oh suuuuuuuure you are! I bet you're surrounded by girls right now!

Ben looked around his flat, which was as empty as the day she left it. Zoe was starting to drive him crazy, the way she fussed about his age and assumed the worst about him. Why was it so hard for her to believe he had legitimate feelings for her? Sometimes he wanted to take her by the shoulders and shake some sense into her.

To Zoe: no, I am very much alone. I wish you were here.

Sometimes she waited so long to reply, he was convinced she must have had more important things to do. Ben wished, more than anything, that he could somehow move to the top of her priorities list. Did she even give him a second thought?

To Zoe: Don't you miss me? Even a teeny tiny bit? Give me some hope!

Still no reply.

To Zoe: Alright then. I'm going to assume your answer is no...

To Ben: Waaaait! I was in the potty and couldn't reply. I didn't want to text you while I was tinkling. Yes!! Yes, I do miss you! There, U happy?

Ben could feel the grin stretching across his face. At least he wasn't completely and utterly hopeless in his pursuit of the woman of his dreams.

To Ben: Was that TMI? Too much information?

To Zoe: Not at all. I rather like the image that flashed thru my mind... of yer bum on the porcelain throne.

To Ben: Ok, now THAT is TMI!! You should keep those dirty potty fantasies to yourself, mmkay?

Ben got up, mobile in hand, and went to his bed. As small as his flat was, it didn't take him long to cross the room. As soon as he crashed on the mattress, he texted:

To Zoe: You are terrible. I don't have "potty" fantasies. It was the image of yer bum that was so titillating.

To Ben: Are you using the word TITillating on purpose, you naughty boy?

To Zoe: what! of course not!

To Ben: Well it was a big word nonetheless. I'm impressed. So how long are we going to text each other? You are eating up my minutes and I need to get to bed.

To Zoe: I have unlimited texts, so i could text u all nite. Do you want me to call u instead? skype or something? it would be nice to see your face

To Ben: I have never used skype before.

To Zoe: Neither have I. seems like a load of bollocks to me. by the way, it is my birthday next week. do you know what that means? it means you are obligated to come visit me.

To Ben: Oh I am, am I? I'll have to remember that. Does that mean you'll be coming to get me?

Ben piled up two pillows behind his head and continued to send her texts. He really could write to her all night long--if she would let him. Would she ever know how much he missed her face, how much he longed to see her? He could try to tell her, but he knew she would laugh it off. Zoe was determined to believe he could never say anything heartfelt and genuine.

To Zoe: It also means I am turning 23, which means you can no longer fuss over our 10 year age difference.

To Ben: Until 3 months from now, when I turn 33.

Ben's eyes rolled so far back in his head, he thought he was in danger of losing them to his brain. Why did age matter so much to her if it didn't matter to him?

To Zoe: and to answer your question, i WILL be coming to get you. my bday is on wednesday...when is a good time for you?

To Ben: I don't know if I can get away on Wednesday. Would it be alright if I came on the weekend?

So he would have to spend his actual birthday alone? Without her? Ben's heart sank so far, he swore he could feel it somewhere in his stomach.

To Zoe: :'(

To Ben: Aww, don't cry! Maybe I can ask Lewis for some time off?

To Zoe: No, he's a twat, don't bother. I'll come get you on saturday... dont forget!!

Chapter Eighteen

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

I've noticed British people use the word "brilliant" a lot. We're going to the grocery store? That's brilliant! That show on the telly? It's brilliant! Having a drink at the pub? You guessed it... brilliant!

Maybe I'm just being pessimistic, but I don't think everything can be THAT brilliant!

Zoe stood outside the car while she waited for Chris to arrive. If he was going to get bullied after school, she was going to be there to put a stop to it.

When he saw her, Chris lifted a hand in silent salutation. He threw his rucksack into the backseat and climbed into the car.

"Hey," she greeted him.

"Hi, Zoe."

She noticed he was fidgeting with something in his hands, so she asked, "What do you have there?"

He held it up so she could see it. "A rubber band."

"Oh. Not as fascinating as I thought," Zoe said with a chuckle. "Do you want to go anywhere today, or do you want to go directly home?"

"Directly home."

They rode in silence for a few minutes, and a few minutes was all they had. Before she knew it, they were pulling into the Eastham's driveway. She could never quite get over how huge the house was, and no matter how long she stayed, she didn't think she would ever be comfortable enough to call it her home.

When the car stopped, Chris said, "Zoe?"

"Hmm?" She pulled out the car keys and dropped them into her purse.

"I..." He blew on the window, fogging it up. Then he wrote the letter C on the glass. He was obviously hesitating, but she didn't know why. "I guess I'm not going to be bullied by Walter anymore."

"Really? That's great!" The first thought that popped into her mind was that Chris must have let Walter have it. Maybe he decked him one, and Walter ran away with his tail between his legs? If that was the case, Zoe certainly wasn't going to complain. "Did something happen?"

"Well... no." Chris shrugged. "Dad says I'm going to go live with my mum... in Stevenage."

"What?! When?!"

"Tomorrow."

"Tomorrow!?" All at once, a thousand different questions sprang into Zoe's head. Why hadn't anyone said anything to her? What did it mean for Zoe? What did it mean for her job? "Are you sure about this, Chris?" She was staring at him in the rear-view mirror, so she saw him nod. "Well... will I be going with you?!"

"No. I don't think so."

"How long are you going to be in Stevenage?"

"I don't know. I think it might be permanent." Chris blew on the window a second time, and the fog reappeared. When it did, he turned his C into a frowny face. "I'll miss you."

"I'll... miss you too," Zoe said. Her head was spinning. She had a million different questions, but there was no one to ask, since Lewis wasn't due to return from work until late that night. "Do you want me to make you a snack or something?"

"No. That's alright." When Chris got out of the car, Zoe wrapped an arm around his shoulders. Chris had just started warming up to her--now they were going to take him away? It was incredibly unfair! "Do you think we could go somewhere with Uncle Ben sometime, even though I'm going to live in Stevenage?"

Zoe wasn't too familiar with British cities, so she asked, "How far is Stevenage from London?"

"Not too far, I don't think."

"Then... I don't see why not." Zoe was wincing as she spoke. If her job was hanging in the balance, she didn't know how long she would be staying in the UK. If Lewis was going to "sack" her, she would probably end up going back home.

Ben won't be too happy about that, Zoe thought to herself.

"Hey, Chris?"

He flicked the rubber band at her, but she knew he was being playful, so she didn't reprimand him. "What?"

"You want to play some games with me?"

"Yeah!" he cheered. "You really want to?"

"I do!" She started shuffling in the direction of the house. "The first person to reach the game room gets first dibs on characters!"

As soon as she made her declaration, Chris raced past her. Watching him go, she realized it would probably be the last time they would get to play together.

And even though she wasn't an avid gamer--far from it--she was immensely disheartened by that fact.

* * *

It was half past midnight when Lewis got home. Even though it was late, Zoe was waiting for him in the foyer.

"Lewis!" she shouted his name as soon as he popped his head in the door.

"Ohhhh great," he groaned. "I know what this is about." Lewis removed his suit coat, slung it over his arm, and hurried down the hallway, as if hoping to leave her behind.

"Tomorrow?!" she yelled. "Gemma is coming to get Chris tomorrow!? When were you planning on telling me?"

"Soon," Lewis said.

"Soon? Soon as in, when? Two minutes before Gemma showed up to claim him?!" She followed him down the hall, to his room. Lewis sat on the end of his bed and started removing his shoes, barely acknowledging her presence. "Where does this leave me?!"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... if Chris isn't going to be here, I can't imagine you'll have much use for a nanny!" Zoe exclaimed. "Is his visit with Gemma going to be temporary, because Chris seemed to think it's permanent."

"It's... permanent," Lewis reluctantly confessed. "Although, he will be coming to visit me on weekends..." He tossed his shoes to the floor and started removing his socks, which made Zoe sneer.

"So am I going to go with Gemma?!"

"Of course not!" Lewis threw back his head and cackled. "As if she could possibly pay for a nanny's services! And you know... not to be rude, but you weren't exactly her favorite person in the world."

"I'm aware of that," Zoe sighed. "So does that mean I'm fired? Does that mean I'm only going to be needed on the weekends? You need to tell me what's going on!"

Lewis rose from the bed and stalked toward her, barefoot and grinning. He placed his thumb under her chin and coaxed her to look in his direction. "I don't want you to leave, Zoe..." he whispered.

"Well, it doesn't sound like you'll have much use for me."

"Oh, but I believe I DO have some use for you," Lewis said. "I've made no secret of my feelings, have I? So it should come as no surprise... you know I want you."

Zoe took a step backward, toward the open doorway. Lewis reached around her back and slammed the door shut, preventing her escape. "So you want me to stay here as your... what? Your mistress or something?!"

He brushed a knuckle across her cheek. "That's one way to put it."

"Lewis..." she rolled her eyes at him. "You really think I'm that kind of girl?"

"I don't know what kind of girl you are, Zoe." He was standing so close to her, she could feel his breath on her neck. "But I'm willing to find out."

"I'm leaving, Lewis," she announced. "I'm leaving when Chris is leaving."

"You're not leaving," he whispered, directly into her ear. "I won't let you leave."

"Lewis..."

"I won't let you leave."

Zoe started to reach for the doorknob, but he grabbed her hand. He lifted her off her feet and proceeded to carry her to the bed, so she balled a first and started pummeling his back.

"Lewis, what are you doing?!" Zoe screamed. "Put me down! Have you lost your mind?!"

Lewis tossed her on the bed. When she started to scramble away, he grabbed her feet and reeled her back to him. "LEWIS!" she hollered. "LEWIS, STOP!"

"I'm not stopping. I know you want this." When he started unzipping his pants, Zoe knew she was in trouble. He shoved his pants down, and his gray boxers came into view.

Zoe was starting to feel sick, especially when Lewis lifted her shirt and kissed her on the stomach. She slapped the side of his head as hard as she possibly could, which made him wince. "Lewis, you need to STOP this!"

"No!" He grabbed her wrists, twisting them, wrestling them to the bed. "I won't fucking stop. Not until I've had you."

"You're hurting me!"

He let go of her hand and pulled down one side of her shorts, kissing her on her bare hip. Zoe gave silent thanks to God that she had decided to wear underwear that day. She clamped her knees shut, as tightly as she could, because that's what her mother always told her to do if some guy ever tried to rape her.

Is that what Lewis was trying to do? Rape her?! Her mind in a panic, Zoe used her free hand to claw at Lewis' neck. So he grabbed her hand and shoved it back to the bed, overpowering her.

"Chris!" Zoe screamed "CHRIS!"

"Don't try to call for my son!" As punishment, Lewis pinned his knee against her stomach. "What is he going to do when he comes in here? What is he going to think?"

Lewis let go of her hand again, grabbed her jaw, and forced a kiss on her lips. Zoe squealed and pounded on his head, which only made him more aggressive. He whipped his shirt over his head and she tried, fruitlessly, to shove him off of her. He was too strong, too big, and too powerful.

But there was one thing she could do to him. When Lewis started kissing her stomach again, she lifted her leg and kneed him in the crotch, as hard as she possibly could. Lewis rolled to one side and gripped his groin, groaning like a baby. It gave Zoe the window of opportunity she needed. She leapt from the bed and ran out of the room as quickly as her legs could carry her.

"Zoe!" he hollered. "Zoe, get back here!"

Zoe was in tears as she charged down the hallway. She heard him calling to her, and it felt like a scene out of a horror movie. It was, without a doubt, going to go down in history as the most traumatic moment of her life.

Zoe made a brief stop in her bedroom, grabbing her purse. She didn't have time to grab anything else--she needed to leave as quickly as possible, as she didn't want to give Lewis a chance to catch up to her. She ran out of the house, down the driveway, down the road. She had no destination in mind; her only goal was to put as much distance between herself and Lewis as she possibly could. Shuddering, Zoe tried to cuddle herself in her arms. It was freezing cold, and she could still feel Lewis' hands on her body, which was making her tremble even harder.

"What an asshole..." she whispered to herself. "Unbelievable.."

Zoe charged down the country road, her sock-covered feet stomping on the ground. When she heard the rumble of an approaching vehicle, Zoe dove into the nearby hedges. If it was Lewis, the last thing she wanted was to be found. She waited for the vehicle to pass, then she took out her cell phone and forced her trembling fingers to write a text.

To Ben: Something really bad happened. Will you come get me?

Ben was the only person she could turn to, the only person who might help her. But what if he was asleep? She would wait a few minutes, and if he didn't reply, she would have to give him a call.

It only took him thirty seconds to respond.

To Zoe: im on my way. What happened?

To Ben: Lewis went nuts. I had to run out of the house. I'm hunkering down in the bushes and I have no idea where I am.

To Zoe: did he hurt you??? where are you?!

Zoe peered out of the hedges and looked around. She picked a spider from her hair, which would have made her panic under normal circumstances, but the circumstances were hardly normal.

To Ben: I'll tell you more later. As for where I'm located, there's a red cottage across the street, and a sign pointing to Dorchester. I was running for about ten minutes I guess.

To Zoe: I think I know where you are. Is there a fork in the road? I'll try to get there as soon as I can. Stay put. are you alright?

Before she could respond, the phone rang. She was a bit hesitant to answer, thinking the caller might be Lewis. Then she noticed the incoming call was coming from Ben, and she breathed a sigh of relief.

When she heard his voice, a second wave of relief washed over her.

"Zoe? Are you alright!?"

A tear dripped down her cheek, but she tried to keep her cool. She whispered into the phone, "I think so..."

"What did he do!?"

"N-nothing," she lied, because it was the first word that popped into her head. How much did she want to tell him? That his brother jumped on top of her and started removing his clothes? That he pinned her down with the intent of forcing himself on her? It was bad enough that those images were running through her mind, she didn't want them running through Ben's.

"It wasn't nothing. I can tell you're upset. If he did something to hurt you, I swear--"

"He... he didn't hurt me. Not really," Zoe said. "But he did throw me down on the bed and started kissing me all over, so..."

"He did what?!"

"Trust me, I did NOTHING to encourage it!" Zoe exclaimed. "He just started shoving me down and... I don't know if I want to talk about it..."

"Zoe, I'm so sorry," Ben said. "I'll be there as soon as I can. It shouldn't take as long because there's hardly any traffic. I'm in Jordan's car right now, so you might not recognize me right away. It's a dark green Fiat."

"Okay."

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," she said. "I'm just shaken. I can't talk long because I'm running out of minutes. In fact, I better hang up now in case you have trouble finding me later on."

"Alright." He sounded reluctant.

"Thanks for coming to get me," Zoe said. She wiped another tear from her eye before it had a chance to fall.

"You don't have to thank me," he said. "You know I'd come for you anytime."

"Well, I really appreciate it." Zoe started rubbing on her ice cold arm, hoping to create some friction. "Oh, and Ben?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"It was really good to hear your voice," she said. "It makes me feel better."

Chapter Nineteen

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Zoe453 last visited: 2 days ago

When she saw the dark car stop on the road, Zoe was a bit reluctant to reveal her hiding spot. She tiptoed from the bushes, held her breath, and approached.

Ben came flying out of the car, which meant she could breathe a sigh of relief. She was tempted to run over to him, to throw her arms around him and thank him a thousand times. And she might have done just that, were she not such a reserved person.

However, Ben came running over to her. He tore off his jacket and draped it across her shoulders. He even buttoned her up a little bit, which she appreciated, because she could no longer feel her hands. Running around chilly England in a t-shirt and shorts probably wasn't the smartest thing to do, but what other option did she have?

"Are you okay?" Ben asked. He pulled her against his chest and cradled her head in his hand. After going through such an ordeal, Zoe had to admit--it was nice to be held.

"I'm okay."

"God, you're freezing." Ben kept his arm around her as he led her to the car. "Where are your belongings? Do you have anything?"

Zoe shook her head. "Just my purse. I had to run..."

"Do you want to go back and get your things?" Ben asked. He opened the door for her and helped her into the front seat. "I can deal with Lewis. In fact, I'm tempted to do him some bodily harm. I'd love to break his arms... shove his cock down his throat..."

"No. I don't want to go back!" Zoe insisted. "Let's just go. You don't mind, do you?"

"Not at all." Ben climbed into the driver's seat and continued down the road. She hugged herself in her arms, but she wished he would hug her. Of course, that would be impossible, at least while he was driving. However, Ben's jacket smelled like his cologne, so snuggling his coat was the next best thing.

"Are you mad at me?" she asked. "I don't even have a toothbrush."

Zoe's whimpered question made him chuckle. "No, of course I'm not. I'll buy you a toothbrush. I'll buy you anything you need."

"I don't even have any underwear," she reported with a sigh.

"That's alright. I'll buy you some knickers too."

Zoe chuckled. In spite of her situation, she was actually laughing. She wiped another tear from the corner of her eye, hoping he wouldn't see it. "I don't have any clothes..."

"That's okay. You can wear my clothes... at least until we can buy you some new clothes, or recover your missing ones," Ben said. "In fact, if you wore my clothes, I imagine that would be pretty sexy. Just the thought of you prancing around in one of my loose-fitting, button-down shirts..."

Zoe slapped his arm. "Ben!"

"What? Sorry!" He gave his arm a rub. "Was that bad timing?"

"No. It's alright." Zoe turned to the window, where the scenery was whipping by. Reckless Ben was driving well over the speed limit, but she didn't care. The further away they got, the better she felt. "You don't mind if I stay in your flat, do you?"

"Of course I don't mind! Silly Zoe...you should know I would love to have you there. I've been quite lonely... ever since you left my company." He turned toward her, displaying his exaggerated pout.

"I just don't want to be a burden."

"You could never be a burden."

"I guess I don't even have a job anymore. That's two jobs I've lost in the last two months..."

"I haven't even had a job in the last two months," Ben admitted with a sigh. "So you can safely say you're doing better than I am."

* * *

As soon as they entered his flat, Zoe marched into the room and crashed on the couch. She felt like she was in a daze. It was almost four o'clock in the morning and she hadn't gotten any sleep. After the night's events, she doubted she would be able to rest her mind enough to actually fall asleep.

Then she looked over at Ben and realized he wasn't getting any sleep either. He was just as sleep-deprived as she was, and it was her fault.

"I'm sorry," the apology popped out of her mouth.

"Why are you apologizing, sweetheart?"

"Because..." Zoe's lips were quivering, so she pressed them together. "I made you come get me... I've kept you up all night."

"I usually don't sleep until around two o'clock in the morning anyway, so this isn't much different," Ben said. "Besides, you didn't make me come get you... and it wasn't too far out of my way. If I had to, I would have driven to Scotland and back to come get you."

"Really?" Her voice was so tiny, she barely recognized it.

"Really!" Ben grabbed a blanket off of his mattress and draped it across her body. With a grin, he added, "I would have swum to Ireland too."

Zoe chuckled. "You would not!"

"Oh, I believe I would!" Ben was lost in thought for a few seconds. He put his hands on his hips and scoured the room. "Hmm... what would you like to wear? You're freezing to death, so I need to get you some warm and snuggily clothes. ...I know!" He went to a chest of drawers--a new piece of furniture since her last visit--and pulled out a pair of fuzzy black pants. "How about these?"

"Are they clean?"

"I don't know. I should probably perform a sniff test on them." Ben held the pants under his nose and inhaled deeply. "Yes, I believe they might be clean!"

Zoe wrinkled her nose. "Umm... eww?"

Zoe's reaction made him double over with laughter. As soon as his laughter subsided, he insisted, "Of course they're clean! I wouldn't give you anything that needed a wash. Here." He tossed her the pants. "Do you want a sweatshirt or something?"

"I'm okay." Despite Ben's claim, Zoe performed her own "sniff test" on Ben's pants. They smelled nice enough, so she slipped them on, over her shorts.

Ben went to the kitchenette, which wasn't too far away. His one-room flat was so small, it didn't take him long to cross the room. "Would you like me to make you some tea? That should warm you up."

"Tea would be nice."

"Earl gray or green tea?"

"Green tea." It didn't take her long to decide. Earl gray was a popular choice for Brits, but it must have been an acquired taste because she didn't really like it.

Ben started heating up some water in his electric kettle. While he waited on the water to boil, he turned toward Zoe. When he saw her smiling at him, he almost melted. After everything she had been through tonight, he didn't expect to see a smile on her face. Her smile could only mean he was doing a good job cheering her up.

"Is there anything else you need?" he asked. "A toothbrush or something? Damn... I don't think I have one. Unless you want to use mine, which I doubt you would. I'll run over to Boots and get you one tomorrow. Is that alright?"

Zoe nodded.

"Do you want something to eat? I have..." When Ben opened his fridge, he realized its contents were disappointing. "Beer. And, um... more beer. Also, some milk."

"I'm okay!" Zoe said with a chuckle.

"I think there's some cereal in the cupboard. I probably meant for that to be used with the milk." Ben laughed at himself. "I'll go shopping tomorrow. We can go together, if you'd like. I--"

"Ben!" she interrupted.

"What?"

"Thanks for taking care of me." Zoe pulled the blanket, warm and woolly, around her body as tightly as she could. The difference between Ben and his brother was so vast, she could hardly believe they were related.

"Well... I'm happy to help." His water started boiling, so he poured it over a teabag and let it steep. While the tea was underway, he went back to the bed and started removing his clothes--first his shirt, then his--

When Zoe turned around and saw him in his black boxer-briefs, she nearly had a heart attack. One top of everything else, he really did have a perfect body: chiseled, lean, muscular.

"Uh... Ben? Do you think you could give me some warning before you start taking off your clothes?"

"Oh. Sorry." He quickly hopped into a pair of sweatpants. "There. Problem solved." He went back to the kitchenette and turned his attention back to her tea.

"Um... Ben?" she repeated. "You're not going to put on a shirt?"

He started preparing her tea the way he liked it, with a bit of milk and sugar. "Does it bother you?"

Bother wasn't the correct word. Hot and bothered would have been more appropriate. "No."

As soon as he delivered the tea to Zoe, he grabbed a shirt off the floor and popped it over his head, much to Zoe's disappointment. Ben really did have an incredible body, complete with sinewy forearms and perfect pectorals. He looked like he belonged in a Gladiator movie. She would have gladly stared at his bare chest all night long if he would have given her the chance.

"How's your tea?" Ben asked, his voice snapping her out of her reverie.

"Good!" She took a sip, hoping he wouldn't realize it was actually the first sip she was taking. "It's good." The tea generated a warming sensation throughout her body, which she desperately needed, so she drank it down quickly.

"I moved the television closer to the mattress... because, well, sometimes I like to lay in bed and watch it."

"Aww..." Zoe gave him a little nudge. "Did you say television just for me?"

"The telly," he corrected himself with a smile. "I moved the telly."

Zoe finished her tea in a few minutes' time, so she set the mug aside. "I'm going to go lay down in bed then," she announced.

"Alright."

"And I want you to come with me."

Ben tilted his head, as if he hadn't heard her correctly. "Pardon?"

"I want you to lay in bed with me!" Zoe grabbed his t-shirt--which she wished he wasn't wearing--and tugged him in the direction of the bed. "I want to cuddle."

"Oh boy." Ben leapt from the couch and ran to the mattress. He didn't need to be asked twice. "What did I do to deserve cuddle time?"

When Zoe slid onto the mattress with him, he was greeted with another surprise. She kissed his lips a few times, softly and sweetly, before settling her head on his chest.

Ben started running a hand through her hair, and her scalp tingled every time he touched her. "I'm so sorry about what happened to you tonight, Zoe," he whispered. "I would kill Lewis... if you'd let me."

"No," she protested. "Don't worry about it."

"I want you to feel safe while you're here," Ben sad, cupping her cheek in his hand. "I want you to feel safe... with me. You know I wouldn't let anything happen to you."

"I do feel safe with you."

"Good." Ben started stroking her hair again, determined to caress her until she fell asleep. "You have no idea how much that means to me."

Chapter Twenty

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Hindsight is 20/20, or so they say. I probably shouldn't have told my mom I'm living with a guy.

The next morning, Ben told Zoe she could use his laptop, and she felt obligated to tell her mother what was going on. She sat on the couch, her hair looking like a mess, and logged into her email.

Hey mom,

I just thought I'd give you an update on what's happening across the pond. Chris, the little boy I was looking after, went to live with his mom (I told you about the parents separating, right?) So that means I'm currently without a job. Yep... I'm joining the ranks of the unemployed yet again! That didn't take long, did it?

I moved out of the Eastham house last night. So you don't panic, I thought I'd let you know where I'm currently staying (although it'll probably make you panic even worse!) I'm currently staying in London with a guy named Ben, but I probably won't be here long

Zoe didn't realize Ben was standing over her shoulder, reading her message. When he read her last line, he shouted, "Hey!"

She tried to cover the laptop screen. "Ben! Why are you reading my personal messages?!"

"Sorry." Though he apologized, his apology was far from genuine. Ben sat on the couch beside her and unabashedly reread her email. "Do you really have to tell her you won't be here very long? And maybe you should use the word living instead of staying. As long as you're here, I want you to feel like this is your home!"

"Ben?"

"Hmm?"

Zoe gave him a gentle knock on the head. "Don't read my messages, okay? Git!" She rotated 90 degrees on the couch, hoping to use her body to shield the computer screen from his view. Even though she didn't approve of Ben's spying, she deleted her last line.

I moved out of the Eastham house last night. So you don't panic, I thought I'd let you know where I'm currently staying (although it'll probably make you panic even worse!) I'm currently living in London with a guy named Ben... I've mentioned him before, haven't I? He's my former employer's brother. And before your mind jumps to conclusions, Ben and I are just friends. He's been nice enough to give me a place to stay, and I have graciously accepted.

I'll leave you the address so you can contact me in the event of an emergency. Write back and let me know what's been going on over on your side of the pond!

-Zoe

When she finished composing her message, Zoe logged off, closed the laptop, and handed it back to Ben.

"What did you write?" Ben asked. "Did you tell her I was ridiculously handsome, that I'm the epitome of virility?"

"Uh-huh," Zoe lied. "You must have been reading my mind, because that's exactly what I said... and I left her a footnote about your massive ego."

"Hey! What ego?"

Before she could respond, Ben grabbed her by the waist and dragged her onto his lap. When he started bouncing her on his knee, she had to ask, "WHAT are you doing?"

"Am I wrong to assume we've progressed far enough in our relationship that I can put you on my lap whenever I feel like it?" he asked, smiling cheekily. "Besides, I thought you'd like to go for a ride on the horse."

"Horse?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah." Ben kept bouncing her on his knee, up and down, up and down. "It's a bit like riding a horse, don't you think? Now that we don't have access to Rassy, this is the best we can do."

"I've never seen a horse that was six foot two, bipedal, and exceptionally good-looking."

When he stopped bopping her on his knee, Ben coiled his arms around her waist. "Am I exceptionally good-looking?"

She leaned closer to him, as if she was going to kiss him. "Of course you are."

"Well... I think you're really, really gorgeous." Ben started swirling a finger on her cheek, which prompted her to grab his hand and squeeze it.

"That tickles!" she squealed.

"Aww. Are you ticklish?"

"Yes!"

Zoe knew what would happen next: admitting she was ticklish was practically an invitation. In an instant, Ben's hands started roving over her body in a merciless onslaught of tickles. Breathless with giggles, Zoe leapt from the couch and dashed away; Ben got up and gave chase. He followed her to the kitchenette, where he trapped her near a cupboard.

"Oh, you're going to get it now!" He held up his palms and flexed his fingers. "Tickle Monster is coming!"

Just as the Tickle Monster closed in on its prey, there was a knock on the door.

"Oi!" Someone shouted. They kept pounding on the door, well beyond the point of obnoxiousness. "Are you in there? Granny, get the door!"

"Ohhh no..." Ben groaned. "I think that's--"

"James," Zoe finished.

"Helllllooooooooo!" The pounding didn't stop. "Benji, are you in there? You cunt! Answer the door!"

"Should I get that?" Ben asked, wondering how he was going to explain Zoe's presence in his flat.

"It's up to you."

"Open the door, or I'll be taking a piss on it!"

"Don't be a twat," whispered another voice. Apparently, James and Jordan had both popped by for a visit.

When she saw Ben go to the door, Zoe collapsed on the couch and tried to look as casual as possible--never mind the fact that she was wearing Ben's oversized shirt and pants! She already knew his "mates" were going to have a field day with that.

As soon as Ben opened the door, James stalked into the room like he belonged. "Finally! For fuck's sake! Took you long eno--" His voice trailed off when he saw Zoe sitting cross-legged on the couch. "Well, well... and what do we have here?"

Jordan entered the room behind his flame-haired friend. When he spotted Zoe, he gave her a polite smile and a nod.

"I remember you," James said, grinning. "What's the nanny doing in your flat, mate?"

"She's..." Ben's throat squeaked, so he had to clear it. It was best to get it over with, as James was likely to take the piss out of him either way. "Zoe's staying with me for awhile."

Looking terribly amused, James strutted around the room with his hands on his hips. "Oh really?" He stopped next to Ben and gave him a slap on the arm. "You wanker! You lucky bastard!"

"It's not like that," Ben came to her defense. "Zoe's just staying here while she gets things sorted."

"Are you shaggin?" James squawked.

"No."

His red-headed friend thrust an accusatory finger in Ben's face. "You are, aren't you?"

"James!" Zoe shouted at him. "We're not shagging. I'm just staying here with Ben until I figure out what I'm going to do next."

"Well... if you ain't shaggin, you should be shaggin. You'd make a lovely couple." James crashed on the couch beside Zoe and wrapped an arm around her. "That is... unless you'd rather shag me?"

Zoe scooted a couple feet away from him. "Nope. I'll pass, but thanks."

"She's so polite and everything!" James exclaimed. "I've never had a girl decline a shag so graciously."

"James... don't be a dick," Ben cautioned him.

"I'm not! She's obviously your territory, mate. I mean no harm." James hopped off the couch and started bobbing up and down, which had Zoe convinced there was a touch of ADHD in there. "So, are we going to the pub or what?"

Ben's eyes were fixed on Zoe. "I... don't know."

"Ohhh... come on!" James gave Ben another slap on the arm. "Jordan and I are going, with or without you!"

"Is that all you guys ever do? Go to pubs?" Zoe asked. "By the time you're twenty five, you boys aren't going to have any livers."

James hooked his thumbs into his empty belt loops and thrust his pelvis in her direction, as if that would somehow impress her. "Well, that's only two years off. I better live it up while I can!"

"You can go without me," Ben said. "I'm staying here with Zoe."

"Not to say I blame you, mate, but..." James shook his head. "It sounds like you're a bit pussy whipped already."

Jordan grabbed James by the scruff of his shirt and started dragging him out of the flat. "Let's go."

"You sure you don't want to go?" James offered. "You can bring the nanny too. It'll be a grand!"

"No, thanks." Ben shook his head. "Maybe next time. Thanks for stopping by."

"Pussy whipped. That's what's going on here, I'm tellin' ya..." James hesitated on the way out the door, so Jordan gave him a little push.

When they were alone again, Zoe grabbed the laptop and turned it back on. "Your friends are certainly..."

"Twats?" Ben offered.

"Well... I was going to say colorful."

"Jordan's alright. But James? He can take a bit of getting used to."

"I'm sure." Zoe started logging into her email again. Whenever she sent a message, she usually turned into a compulsive email checker.

"You want something to eat?"

"In a little bit." When she signed on, she was surprised to see she already had a reply from her mum.

Mum? Even her thoughts were sounding British!

Zoe,

You're living in London with a BOY??? How old is he? How well do you know him? Are you sure it's safe? You're not having sex with him, are you? How long are you going to be staying with him? I hope you know what you're doing, Zoe Elizabeth Manet!

If you're without a job, you should come HOME.

P.S. - Is he cute? At least tell me he's cute!

-Mom

Chapter Twenty One

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Looking around London, I can't help but think the average American man is hotter than the average British man. However, the really hot British guys are insanely, wickedly, ridiculously hot. We're talking unholy levels of hotness. What do they have in the water here?!

The next day, it was Benjamin's birthday. To celebrate, Ben wanted to go to the city of York. At first, Zoe thought he wanted to go to New York, but the Old York was his city of choice. To get there, they first had to ride on the London "Tube," where Zoe spent the duration of the journey with her face in some guy's armpit. It was a tight squeeze, like most subway rides, but she somehow managed to survive.

When they got to King's Cross Station, they were swarmed by throngs of busy travelers. Ben held her hand as they made their way to the train. When they finally made it beyond the impassable horde, Zoe had felt the jostle of countless elbows.

"Well... that was fun!" she quipped. "I just love public transportation."

Ben and Zoe wandered to the back of the train and seated themselves at a table. They were only going for one night, so Ben had packed the smallest of bags, which he tossed on the seat beside him. The train was full, and seats were scarce, so an ancient man in a bowler hat ended up sitting next to Zoe.

"I like your hat," Zoe said.

"Ohhh!" Smiling, the old man touched the brim of his hat. "Thank you, love. And where are you heading today?"

"York." She pointed at Ben, who was sitting across from her. "We're going for his birthday."

"It's your birthday?" the old man asked. When he saw Ben nod, he exclaimed, "Well, happy birthday! Are you an American?"

"I am," Zoe said. "He's not."

"I see, I see..." The old man murmured. His liver-spotted hands shook as he fumbled with his Daily Telegraph. "Are you together?"

"No," Zoe replied.

"Yes," Ben said, at exactly the same time.

Their contrasting answers made the old man snicker. "I think there might be a difference of opinion here."

"Zoe wants to be with me," Ben declared, "she just won't admit it yet."

The train charged forward, and they started their journey in silence. The old man read his newspaper, Ben got out his laptop, and Zoe played some sort of stupid game on her cellphone, which got boring after about twenty minutes.

About halfway through the journey, the old man got off at one of the stops, and no one sat next to Zoe. However, across the way, a mother was changing her baby's nappy on the table.

"Ohh... that's so gross," she whispered to Ben.

"What is?"

"That!" Zoe tried, inconspicuously, to gesture toward the mother.

"You don't like babies?" he asked with a chuckle. "So much for wanting you to be the mother of my children..."

"No, it's not that. It's the fact that she's changing the baby's diaper right there on the table! People eat there, don't they? Yuck." The pungent stench of infant diarrhea polluted the air, so Zoe pinched her nose. Following her example, Ben cupped a hand over his face.

"I guess that is pretty gross," he admitted.

"Any-ay..." Zoe continued, her voice muffled by her pinched nose. "I wanna do tok about kiss."

"What?!" Ben leaned forward, across the table. "Did you say something about a kiss?"

She let go of her nose and repeated, "I wanted to talk about Chris. I feel bad for him. Do you think he's alright? He went to live with his mom the other day... it sucks that I didn't get to say goodbye."

"He went to live with Gemma?!"

"Yeah. In Stevenage, apparently," Zoe said with a shrug.

"Well... maybe we can stop there on the way back? Pay them a visit?" Ben suggested. "It seems fitting that Lewis chased his entire family away, doesn't it? The bastard. Are you sure you don't want me to kick seven shades of shit out of him?"

"No! Just leave it."

"Ugggh!" Ben groaned. "Why not? It's no less than what he deserves!"

"Like you said... he lost his family. Maybe it's enough."

Ben raked a hand across his face so violently, it looked like he was trying to smear away his nose. "You know what, Zoe? I love everything about you. Except for that."

"Except for what?"

"You're so non-confrontational," Ben said. "And you're so distraught about our age difference, it kills me."

"Well, I certainly wouldn't want to kill you. Especially on your birthday," she said with a grin. "Happy birthday, by the way. Nine years between us isn't as bad as ten years, right?"

"Zoeeee."

"I'm kidding! I don't care about the age difference anymore, okay? When's the last time I've mentioned it? If you like me, I mean really like me, I'm just going to live it up. Because why? Because you're really hot, that's why!"

Ben smirked at her--the most caddish smirk in the world. "I really like you."

"Well good!" Zoe lifted her cell phone so she wouldn't have to look at him anymore. He was so painfully attractive, especially when he smiled, that it almost hurt to look at him. "I really like you too."

They arrived at York approximately two hours after leaving London. As they were leaving the train, Zoe pointed to the bag that was next to Ben.

"Don't forget your murse," she said.

"My what?!"

"Your murse. Man purse," she said with a chuckle. "Maybe that's American slang?"

"I've never heard that before, so I think that might be Zoe slang," Ben teased her. "Anyway, it's a messenger bag, not a man purse!"

Ben slung his bag across his body, took Zoe's hand, and headed out of the train. As they made their way to the heart of the city, Ben pointed out several sights along the way: the medieval wall, a dilapidated abbey. They stood in the shadow of the York Minster, a vast cathedral with towering white spires.

"Wow. That's pretty impressive!" Zoe exclaimed, awed. "Can you go inside?"

"For nine quid, yeah."

"Wait... they charge you to go into a church!? That doesn't seem right."

"I don't think they charge people who want to go inside and pray, but they do charge sightseers," Ben said. "In other words, you and me. Do you want to go in?"

"Maybe later," Zoe suggested. "Maybe we can tour the minster after we check into the hotel and you can get rid of your murse."

"There you go with the murse again!" Ben laughed. "What am I going to do with you, Zoe? You're terrible."

Still holding her hand, Ben led her toward The Shambles, a narrow medieval street with half-timbered buildings and countless shops. Their first stop was a fudge shop, where Zoe blew twenty pounds on a variety of different flavors. She sampled a bit of toffee fudge, which she didn't think she would like, but it made her tongue tingle with delight.

They found another sweet shop at the end of the street, where Ben lightened his wallet on treats for Zoe and Chris, who they officially decided to visit on their way back to London. On the way out the door, Ben handed her a chocolate bear on a stick, which she knew she would never eat. It had the cutest cocoa face she had ever seen, and there was no way she could bite its head off.

When they were done shopping, they headed toward their inn. The Golden Lamb Inn was a spooky old building that looked like it was a gentle breeze away from becoming a pile of sticks.

"We're staying here?!" Gasping, Zoe pointed at a sign in front of the inn. The Most Haunted Inn in York, the sign claimed, in bold black letters. "It's haunted?!"

"Ohhh, don't worry," Ben scoffed it off. "I think every inn in York is the most haunted inn in the city. I wouldn't pay attention to it."

"Okaaay... but if I get goosed by a ghost in the middle of the night, you'll never hear the end of it!"

"If you get goosed by a ghost, that ghost will have officially seen more action than me," Ben said with a pout.

"You can goose me anytime you want," Zoe said. She had no idea what prompted her to give him such a bold invitation, but she didn't regret it.

And she secretly hoped he would deliver.

"I can, can I?! I'll have to remember that." Ben followed her into the inn and they went to the check-in counter. The manager assumed they were husband and wife, which had Ben grinning all the way to their room.

"One bed," Zoe said, which were the first words out of her mouth when they entered the room. "Of course."

"As if it matters!" Ben tossed the messenger bag on the floor and rolled into bed. "We've been sharing a bed in the flat."

"Oh, I'm not complaining," Zoe said. She took a moment to stare at Ben, who was splayed on the bed, looking like some kind of golden god. He was a breathtaking sight, like a man carved from marble. "Definitely not complaining..."

* * *

They ended up paying the nine pounds to get into the York Minster, and it made Zoe feel better to know the money was going toward the upkeep of that beautiful place. After touring the cathedral, they went to get fish and chips, and Ben teased that it was "Zoe's favorite."

They took their food back to the inn and crashed on the bed. Zoe indulged herself in a filet of gloriously greasy fish, and she started to wonder if it really was becoming her favorite. She showed Ben the grease on her fingers and pretended to wipe it on his jeans.

"Do you need a napkin?"

"It looks like I could use one."

He handed her a napkin. One swipe of her fingers had the napkin streaked and semi-soaked.

"Are you having a good birthday?" she asked.

"Of course," Ben said, flashing a perfect white smile, "because I get to spend it with you."

"Sweet talker," she accused him. "By the way, I have a little gift for you. It's nothing too exciting. Chris insisted you would like it."

"He did, did he? Well... let's see it."

Zoe dipped into her purse and pulled out a video game for the Xbox360. She knew nothing about the game, other than the fact that it looked like it would be violent.

"Ah, that's brilliant!" Ben snatched the game out of her hand and gave the box a loving caress. "Chris knows me well."

"Apparently."

"But do you know what I'd really like for my birthday?"

"Do I want to know?"

"I want Zoe. In her birthday suit. In my bed."

"Riiiiight." Zoe gave him a playful little shove. "I didn't want to know that."

When she finished her fish and chips, Ben was still ogling the video game box. He was like a big kid, utterly absorbed by his new toy. She could actually feel herself getting jealous of her birthday gift, as he was currently giving it more attention than he was giving to her.

"Ben." She uttered his name with urgency, hoping to draw his interest away from the game.

"Hmm?"

"I don't know about a birthday suit, but I think you've earned the right to see me in my panties."

Ben, who was still eating his food, had a chip hanging from his mouth. He looked gobsmacked. "What?! Your knickers?!

"Well, yeah!" she laughed. "If you want to call them that... yeah." Zoe started unbuttoning her jeans and easing them off her hips, which seemed to do the trick, because Ben tossed his video game aside. His eyes were anchored to her revealed flesh. Zoe tore the jeans off her thighs, over her legs, and then kicked them off the bed. When she was done, she lay on the bed wearing just a t-shirt, socks, and a pair of light blue "knickers."

"Wow," he admired her. "You have... great legs."

"You think so?"

"I do!" Ben was very adamant about that.

"They're not the sexiest underwear in the world, but whatever." She pulled the underwear a little further down her hip, revealing a tiny rose tattoo.

"Oh wow. Now that's cute!" Ben tapped the tattoo with his finger, hoping he wouldn't get admonished for familiarizing himself with it. "I wouldn't have thought you were the type."

"It's just a tiny little thing. I got it when I was in college."

"Really."

Zoe could see him swallowing hard, because his Adam's apple bobbed. "Do you have any tattoos?"

"Nope. I have a terrible fear of needles, and an aversion to pain," Ben confessed. "By the way... I have to ask. What are those?" He pointed at the bottom of her legs, at her gaudy striped socks.

"Socks." Zoe looked down at her socks and wriggled her toes.

"I know. But they're absolutely atrocious!"

"Oh, they're not that bad!" She kicked him with one of her atrocious-sock-covered feet. "I had to run out of Lewis' house in the middle of the night, remember? These were the socks I was wearing... my pajama socks. If you hate them so much, then buy me some new socks!"

"Actually, I rather like them." Ben gave her little toe a playful pinch. "They make me hot."

Without warning, Zoe sat up and lifted her shirt over her head, revealing a matching blue bra. Ben could feel himself getting dizzy with lust.

"You're such a tease." Reclining in the bed, Ben clasped his hands behind his head.

"Am I?" Zoe could feel her rationalization slipping away. She sat on her knees and leaned over him; her breasts hovered close to his face. "Do you like what you see?"

"Ohhh, I believe I do!" Ben's voice squeaked a bit. "If you were on top of me right now, I think you could feel that I do!"

"Is that an invitation?"

"Sweetheart, you have an open invitation," Ben told her. "You can climb on top of my body any time you wish."

Surprisingly, Zoe accepted his invitation. She slid on top of him and straddled his waist. Ben immediately grabbed onto her hips, holding her in place.

"Ohhh," Ben groaned. "Why would you torture me like this? Devilish girl!"

Zoe pouted. "Is it torture?"

"Well... you said I only get the knickers... no birthday suit," Ben explained, "which leads me to believe I might be blue-balled by the end of the night."

"Well, I can leave if you want me to...I wouldn't want to torture you..."

"No, wait!" Ben held onto her hips as tightly as he could, ensuring she would not leave. "Despite the torture, I'm rather enjoying this turn of events. I like having you on top of me."

"You do?"

"Ohhhh, yes," he said with a chuckle. "If you'd like, you can take off my shirt."

"I would like." Zoe started plucking at the buttons of his shirt. She unbuttoned it half-way, then leaned back to admire her work. There was something infinitely sexy about his disheveled state, and she wanted to burn his half-exposed chest into her memory.

"This is the best birthday ever," Ben declared, grinning.

"Good to know you're enjoying yourself." When she finished with the last button, Zoe pulled open both sides of the shirt and exposed his bare chest. She raked her eyes over him, over his sculpted abs. She even licked her lips a little bit, which she hoped he didn't notice. "You are so gorgeous," she purred.

"You're the gorgeous one."

Zoe, who was well beyond the point of return, leaned down and started trailing kisses across his stomach. She kissed his abs, kissed his navel, kissed his perfect pecs. Her tongue even slipped out to give him a lick.

"Zoe..." Ben whispered her name, a bit breathlessly. "Can I touch you?"

"I dunno. Try me."

Ben moved his hands away from her hips. They drifted to her legs, where he caressed the warm, soft flesh of her inner thighs. Then he reached around, cupping her panty-clad butt in the palms of his hands. "I wonder..." he mused. "How much would you let me get away with?"

"N-not much more..." Zoe thought she could hear someone snapping their fingers in her head, snapping her back to her senses. "In fact, I should probably put an end to it before we go too far..."

When she rolled off of his body, Ben whimpered audibly. "And why do we have to put an end to it?!"

"Because I'm not that kind of girl," she informed him. "Because you're not even my boyfriend!"

"I'll be your boyfriend," Ben said. He rolled on his side and started toiling with her hair, sifting the tendrils through his fingers. "Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

"Yes!" Her answer flew out of her mouth, but it was premature. "And... no. You only want me to be your girlfriend because you want sex!"

"Hey!" Ben flinched a little, as if in pain. "That's not fair. And you're wrong, by the way..."

"You really want me to be your girlfriend? You really like me? You're not just..." Surprisingly, it was a British expression that popped into her head. "You're not just taking the piss?"

"No!" Ben seized her hand and brought it to his lips. He kissed her inner wrist several times, inhaling her milky skin. "I really like you. I want to be with you... exclusively. No matter what you might believe about me, I am the committed type."

"I just don't know... I just don't know if it would last." She sighed. "I really like you, Ben... I just--"

Ben let go of her hand and coiled an arm around her waist. "Will you at least let me hold you?"

"Yeah." Zoe squinted her eyes as tightly as she could. Deep down--or perhaps not so deep--she wanted him to do way more than hold her. She wished she could trust him, that she could ignore her inhibitions. She didn't want to end up nursing another broken heart. "Just give me some time, okay?"

"Okay. I can give you time." Ben's eyes were so sincere, he looked more adorable than ever. "I'll just have to try harder to win your heart."

He already has my heart. She tried to ignore the voice in her head that was telling her that, because it didn't make sense. "Thanks for being so understanding."

"Of course." Ben pulled the blanket over both of them, and took the time to tuck her in. "By the way, Zoe... your arm."

"My... arm?"

"There were bruises on your wrist," Ben pointed out. "Is that what I think it is?"

Zoe expelled a huge sigh. She was hoping he wouldn't notice the bruises, the last remnant of Lewis' attack. "I..."

"It was Lewis, wasn't it?" Ben asked through gritted teeth. "I know it was. You don't have to tell me."

Ben made a mental note to punish his brother.

Chapter Twenty Two

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

The other day, I heard a British person pronounce the word "fillet" with a T. Fill-It. I'm tempted to ask my friend if they'd pronounce "fillet mignon" as "fill-it ming none."

On the way back to London, they stopped in the town of Stevenage and walked three blocks to Gemma's place of residence. She was living with her sister in a two-family duplex, which was a far cry from the Eastham mansion. When she rang the doorbell, Zoe held her breath.

Ben squeezed her shoulder, noting the tension in her body. "Are you okay?"

"I'm alright," Zoe assured him. "It's just that... Gemma hates me."

"I'm sure she doesn't hate you."

"Oh, I'm pretty sure she does!"

A few seconds later, Gemma opened the door. Her bright red hair was curly and kinky, which suggested a bad perm. She had a cigarette in her hand--a "fag," as the Brits would call it. She was wearing way too much black eyeliner, which did little to conceal the puffiness of her eyes. Had she been crying? If that was the case, Zoe almost felt sorry for her.

Until she saw Gemma's sneer.

"What do you want?" Gemma snapped.

Zoe exchanged wary glances with Ben. "To visit Chris. Would that be okay?" she asked.

"I..." Gemma stepped out of the doorway and motioned for them to come inside. "If you must."

Zoe spotted Chris as soon as she stepped inside. He was sitting on the sofa, engrossed in his Nintendo DS. As soon as he saw Zoe, he cast his game aside and ran over to her. He threw his arms around her, capturing her in a hug.

A hug!? Was this the same boy from before?

"Hey, Chris," she said, giving his hair a ruffle. "How have you been?"

"Alright. I've missed you."

If Gemma wasn't glaring at her from a few feet away, Zoe would have been grinning. Now that Chris liked her, she was no longer his nanny. It seemed like such a shame. "I've missed you too. Ben and I got you some treats in York."

"Oh... hey, Uncle Ben," Chris finally acknowledged the other visitor's presence. "What did you get me?"

"Straight to the point," Ben said with a chuckle. He handed Chris a bright blue bag, which was filled with an assortment of goodies: maple cremes, rock candy, fudge. When Chris peeked into the bag, he let out a whoop of excitement.

"Wow, thanks!" Chris dashed over to the couch so he could thoroughly inspect his loot.

Ben turned his attention to Gemma. "Sorry we didn't get anything for you."

"It's not like I expected anything," Gemma said with a roll of her eyes. "And since when did you start buying things as a couple? Are you two... together?"

Ben snaked an arm around Zoe's shoulders and pulled her closer. "Not quite, but I'm working on it."

"Hmm... I had assumed she was shagging my husband. Are you trying to tell me she's shagging you?"

"Heeey," Ben countered, his voice cautionary. "Zoe's not like that. Lewis was the one who acted like a complete twat."

"Ben..." Zoe whispered. "Don't worry about it."

"No!" Ben went on. "Gemma needs to know where the fault lies. Zoe did nothing to provoke my brother. And if you're imagining some sort of an affair in your head, well... it's just that! It's in your head."

Zoe went to the couch and sat next to Chris. She didn't want to get involved. Maybe Ben was right--maybe she was too non-confrontational.

Fortunately, Chris paid little attention to the adults' argument. He was too busy gnawing on a bit of fudge. He tried to offer Zoe a piece, but she politely shook her head.

"Well... it's nice to know Zoe has found such a champion in you, Ben. I'm sure she loves that," Gemma said, rolling her eyes again. "I knew she had to be shagging someone in this family."

"She's not," Ben shook his head. "We're not."

"I don't know what it is about her. She's not that special." Gemma crossed her arms. "I mean, she's sort of pretty, I suppose, but--"

"Gemma," Ben interrupted. "If you managed to get past your ridiculous jealousy problem, you might find out Zoe is a good, sweet girl!"

"Of course you would think that, Ben!"

"Gemma, why do you have to argue with us as soon as we step through the door. Huh? Why does it have to be like that? Why can't you just let us visit with Chris? Why do you have to start slinging around ridiculous accusations?"

"Ben!" Zoe tried to get his attention again. "Just sit down. It's not worth it."

Gemma's hands slid to her hips. "Are you saying I'm not worth it?!" With her current hairstyle, she looked like an angry clown. Even her eyebrows had been dyed a bright, flaming red.

"No, Gemma, that's not what I'm saying," Zoe sighed. "I just don't like to argue."

"I'm not arguing. This isn't an argument!"

"Mum!" Chris finally got a word in.

"What?"

"Shut up, mum." He pulled out a box of assorted chocolates and held it out to Gemma, who sunk into a chair across from the sofa. "Would you like some?"

"No." Gemma tugged at the straps of her tank top, which kept slipping down her shoulders. "Anyway, I suppose it's nice of you to visit Chris. He's been asking about you."

A kind word from Gemma!? It was like an oxymoron had come to life!

"It really is good to see him again,” Zoe said.

"In fact," Ben cut in, "I was hoping Chris could visit us in London sometime. Maybe next Saturday?"

"Visit us in London," Gemma repeated. "Are the two of you living together now?!"

Before Ben could answer, Zoe spoke up, "It's just temporary... until I figure out what I'm going to do. I might be moving back to the States."

"Not if I can help it..." Ben murmured under his breath.

Gemma leaned forward and cupped a hand behind her ear, from which a gaudy orange earring dangled. "Pardon? Did you say something, Ben?" Zoe was wondering the same thing.

"Nothing." Ben turned toward the window and pouted, like a little boy deprived of his favorite pastime. Why didn't Zoe think he was reason enough to stay? Were her feelings for him really so paper thin? Was he wrong to think they had a breakthrough last night? "Anyway, we can't stay long. The next train departs in about twenty minutes..."

Chris grabbed Zoe's wrist. "Aww... you can't stay?!"

"I'm afraid not," Zoe said. "But I'm glad we got to see you. Do you think you'd like to come visit us in London next week?"

At least she'll be with me another week, Ben thought with a frown.

"Yeah. I would." Chris dipped into his candy bag and pulled out another chocolate treat. "Thanks for the candy."

"Of course." Zoe tried to kiss Chris on the head, thinking he'd pull away. But he didn't. He not only accepted it, he accepted it with a smile.

"Can we play some games together when I visit you in London?"

Ben winked and said, "if you think I'd miss game time, then you don't know me very well." He took Zoe's hand; together, they made their way to the door. After exchanging formal farewells with Gemma, they headed back to the train station.

"You know, Zoe..." Ben spoke up, "you don't have to leave me. You don't have to go racing back to the States. You can stay with me as long as you'd like."

"I know you say that... but I don't think I should overstay my welcome. Besides, my mom keeps telling me I should come back home, so--"

"Is that what you want?" Ben asked. "To go back to the States? Have you already made up your mind? Am I just wasting my time?"

"Ben..." Zoe whimpered his name.

"What?!" Ben's retort was slightly acerbic. Not only that, he let go of her hand, which is something he never did. He was never the one to break the hold. He must have been really upset with her.

"I haven't decided anything yet, okay? Please don't give me a hard time..."

They reached the station, so Ben clamped his mouth shut. There was so much he wanted to say to her, needed to say to her, but he didn't know if it would make a difference.

Would it matter if I told her I loved her? he thought with a frown.

Chapter Twenty Three

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Have you ever thought about how horrified Jane Austen would be if she was alive today?

The trip from Stevenage was a short one. Before she knew it, Zoe and Ben were back in London, riding the tube back to his flat. And they were quiet, too, which led her to believe he was still upset with her.

"Are you pissed?" she asked him during the subway ride.

He stared at her for a few seconds, baffled. "What?"

Then she remembered that "pissed" meant something different in the UK, so she asked, "Are you angry with me?"

"No."

His curt response was hardly convincing.

However, Ben didn't have much time for brooding, because there was more drama waiting for them at home. When they got back to the flat, they noticed a man standing outside the building. He was impeccably dressed, in black dress pants and a button-down shirt. His mahogany hair was sideswept, and there was a hint of apprehension in his eyes. The breadth of his shoulders was striking. He might have been broader than Ben, which was no small feat, as Ben was hardly a small man himself.

"Zoe!" the man shouted her name. He ran forward, seizing her by the shoulders. "I've been waiting out here for hours! Where have you been?"

It was Kyle. As soon as she saw his face, Zoe's knees wobbled.

"Oh my god." Her voice was hollow. "How did you find me?"

"I got your address from your mother. We've been worried about you, Zoe. We've missed you..."

"Uh... excuse me," Ben spoke up. "Do you mind telling me who this is?"

"Who are you?" Kyle snapped, flashing wild eyes in Ben's direction.

Ben put his hands on his hips and delivered his answer with confidence. "Zoe's boyfriend." A couple of teenagers rushed past, giving Zoe a momentary reprieve from the awkward encounter.

Kyle chuckled. "That's funny. Her boyfriend?"

"I am." Ben wrapped an arm around Zoe's shoulders, as if claiming her. And it must have worked, because Kyle's hands slid away from her.

"You're not her boyfriend," Kyle matter-of-factly stated. "There's no way. You're not her type."

"He's not my boyfriend." Zoe confirmed.

"See?" Kyle flashed a victorious grin at his rival. He wrapped his arm around Zoe's shoulders and proceeded to drag her away from Ben. "Zoe, I can't even begin to tell you how much I've missed you. Why haven't you called me? Why haven't you sent me any emails? After everything we've been through, I have a hard time believing you'd cut ties with me like that!"

"Waaaait..." Ben followed them as Kyle steered her away. "You're the ex-fiance, aren't you? The cheating one?"

Kyle thrust a disinterested thumb in Ben's direction. "Have you been telling people our business? Zoe!"

"Kyle..." Zoe shook her head. "I'm sorry."

"Zoe, wait..." Ben reached out and snatched her arm, which halted their advance. "Why are you apologizing? Isn't this the man who cheated on you?"

The cocky smirk was back on Kyle's face. "I don't know who you are... and I don't even care, come to think of it, but do you think you could give us some space? The adults are talking."

"Kyle!" Zoe exclaimed.

"What?"

"Don't talk to Ben like that. He's been really good to me."

"Oh, has he?" Kyle laid a hand on his hip, copying Ben's self-assured stance. "Are you seeing this guy? Tell me the truth, Zoe."

"Like you told me the truth?"

"I DID tell you the truth!"

"Yeah, but how long were you cheating on me before you told me?"

"Zoe..." Kyle grabbed Zoe's hand. He kissed her palm, laid it against his cheek, breathed her in. "Can we talk about this in private? You smell really nice, by the way."

"Do I?" She sniffed her wrist.

"You do. You always do..." Kyle stared at her with his puppy dog eyes, those eyes that could always melt her. But she wouldn't give in. She couldn't give in. Not this time.

"Anyway..." Zoe went on. "I am seeing Ben. Sort of. But he's not my boyfriend."

Kyle stared at Ben for several seconds. His eyes turned cold and serious, as if he was seeing him as a worthy competitor for the first time. "But he's not your type!"

"You don't know what my type is."

"He's not your type," Kyle repeated with a chuckle. "How old is he?"

"What does it matter?!" Ben spoke up for himself. "The fact of the matter is... I like Zoe, she likes me, and I would never cheat on her. And she obviously doesn't want to see you, so if you would let us go into our flat..."

Zoe winced. Our flat. Did he really have to say it like that? She knew that was going to raise some questions.

"Wait a second... are you living with him?!" Kyle shrieked. "I thought you said it wasn't serious?"

"It's not what it looks like," Zoe said. "I needed a place to stay, and Ben gave me a place. My mom didn't tell you about that?"

"No." Kyle crossed his arms over his chest, an intimidating gesture for a man of his size. "So you're just living with some random British boy? And notice my emphasis on the word boy."

"He's not just some random British boy." Zoe glanced in Ben's direction as she defended him. "I really like him."

Kyle's puppy dog eyes were back, determined to disarm her. "What about me? You haven't thought about me?"

"Of course I've thought about you..."

"You haven't missed me?"

"I--"

Before she could reply, Kyle scooped her into his arms and pulled her against his chest. He nuzzled his face against her hair and took a deep breath. "Zoe, I've missed you so much."

When Zoe didn't pull away from Kyle right away, Ben glanced away and started scratching his head in frustration. He couldn't stand to see her cozying up to another man. "Zoe... let's just go into the flat. You can deal with him later."

Kyle took Zoe's face in his hands, caressing her cheeks. Her body sagged in his direction, as if he had melted her. "Kyle..." she whispered his name.

"I love you," Kyle said. "I love you so, so much. You're all I've been able to think about. Ever since you left, I haven't been seeing anyone." He brushed a thumb across her lips. "You're all I want."

"Okay, that's enough!" Ben exclaimed. He grabbed Zoe's arm and tried to drag her away, but Kyle held tight, and Zoe seemed to have molded against him.

"Kyle..."

"Zoe... come back with me," Kyle begged her. "I don't know why you ended up staying with this guy, but I'm sure you had a reason. I'm staying at a hotel in London... will you come with me?"

Zoe glanced over her shoulder, trying to find Ben. But he had walked several paces away, clutching his hair in despair. "I don't know, Kyle..."

"Please. I'll get down on my hands and knees if I have to." He pulled her fingers to his lips and kissed them several times. "I need you. You can't imagine how guilty I feel... how sorry I am. I have so many regrets. The only way I can forgive myself is if I can get you to forgive me. I'd do anything to get you to forgive me... to be with me again."

Zoe could feel her knees buckling, weakened by the passion in Kyle's voice. He always had that affect on her.

When Ben returned, she thought she could see tears in his eyes--which had just as much of an affect on her as Kyle's ardor. "Zoe... don't go."

"I'm staying at the Savoy. I think you'll like it... it's really nice," Kyle said. "If you're not comfortable sharing a room, I'll book another one for you. I just want to know where you are. I want to know you're close to me."

Zoe squinted her eyes, trying to block out both of their voices. She was being pulled in opposite directions--with equal force. She couldn't remember a time in her life when she had felt more conflicted.

Finally, she turned to Ben and said, "I'm sorry."

"You're sorry. What does that mean? You're choosing him over me?!"

"I'm sorry..." she repeated, because there was no good explanation for her choice. "I should go."

A moan slipped through Ben's lips. "Noo. Zoe, please. He shows up, and just like that, you abandon me? Please don't do this!"

"It's not like I'm abandoning you, Ben! I'm just going someplace where I'm more comfortable," she tried to explain.

"And you'd be more comfortable in some hotel than with me?" Ben's eyes, fiery with fury, were fastened on Kyle. "Or... it's him, isn't it? You'd feel more comfortable with him?"

"Ben..."

"Just like that, you're finishing with me." Ben pursed his lips and shook his head. He looked furious, but she could see the hurt in his eyes. "That's really unbelievable."

"Ben, please don't be mad."

"I'll be crushed, you know. Crushed." Ben pinched the bridge of his nose, pinching away tears. “You're really okay with crushing my heart?"

"I'm not choosing him over you. I just don't want to be a burden..."

"WHY do you think you'd be a burden on me? You'd really believe that, after all this time?" Ben turned away from them and gave them a dismissive flick of the hand. "Just go. It's fine. You've obviously made your decision."

When Kyle started kissing her on the head, Zoe was glad Ben wasn't facing their direction. "Ben... please don't be mad. We'll be in contact."

"Yeah. We'll be in contact. That sounds warm and fuzzy, doesn't it? Like a proper business arrangement." Ben started heading toward the flat, away from the reunited couple. "Goodbye."

"Ben! Wait!"

"Zoe..." Kyle gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. "Don't worry about him. Let's just go..."

"But--"

"Come on, sweetheart." Kyle slid an arm around her waist and led her away. "There's a lot we need to talk about."

Zoe looked over her shoulder, trying to catch another glimpse of Ben. She hoped Ben would turn around, that he would see the silent plea in her eyes before they parted ways.

But he never looked back.

Chapter Twenty Four

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Wow. I just realized something.

If my fiance never cheated on me, I would have been a married woman by now!

Kyle purchased Zoe her own room at the Savoy. She felt a bit guilty about that, since it looked like an extremely expensive hotel. But for some reason, she felt more comfortable taking advantage of Kyle's kindness. Maybe she felt that way because they had known each other for so long?

Though she had her own room, Kyle didn't stay away too long. Twenty minutes after checking into the hotel, he was knocking on her door. As soon as she opened the door, Kyle held out an enormous bouquet of roses, quite possibly the biggest and most impressive floral arrangement she had ever seen.

When Zoe took the flowers, all she could say was, "wow..."

"Do you like them?"

"I do. They're really nice."

"I brought you a vase too." Kyle pulled out an ornate, oblong vase from behind his back. "I thought they might last longer."

"Thanks." Zoe went to fill the vase and tend to the flowers. When she returned, Kyle was sitting in a chair in a distant corner of the room.

"I really have missed you, you know," he said.

"I've missed you too."

"Have you?" Kyle leaned back in the chair and crossed his left foot over his right knee. "It looks like it didn't take you too long to hook up with someone else."

"We didn't hook up."

"Really? You were living with him. He looked pretty gutted when you left," Kyle observed. "And how old is he, anyway? He looked pretty young."

Zoe fidgeted with the roses as she gave her answer. "Twenty three."

"Twenty three?! Seriously? So he's, like... nine years younger than you. Thirteen years younger than me. Wow." Kyle's eyebrows raised, etching a few deep wrinkles across his forehead, which was a blight on his handsome face. "I thought you didn't like younger guys. You were always very adamant about that."

"Ben is sweet."

"Is he?"

"He is," Zoe insisted. "He's really been taking care of me these last few days."

Kyle snickered a bit. Under his breath, he whispered, "I bet he is..."

He hadn't expected Zoe to hear him, but she did. "Kyle!"

"I'm sorry!"

"I know what you're thinking, but it wasn't like that! We weren't having sex or anything like that," Zoe said. "And even if we were, it wouldn't be any of your business."

Clinkle clinkle.

She had an incoming text. Zoe ran to her purse and pulled out her phone. The message from Ben made her heart skip a beat.

To Zoe: you're making me cry, you know

Was he serious? Zoe tried to picture Ben with tears rolling down his cheeks, but it didn't seem right. He was too strong, self-assured and confident to succumb to crying.

"Is that from him?" Kyle asked, pointing at her phone. "The twenty-three-year-old?" When Zoe didn't respond right away, he assumed he was correct. "He's probably begging you to come back to him."

"It's really none of your business, Kyle."

"If he's anything like me, he didn't realize what he had until you were gone." Kyle ran to Zoe's side and knelt beside her feet. "I know I lost the best thing I ever had. You mean everything to me, Zoe. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you."

"Kyle... you don't have to grovel."

"But I do!" Kyle exclaimed. "I know it's not going to be easy to win your forgiveness, but I'll do everything in my power to get you to give me a second chance."

When Zoe sat at the end of the bed, Kyle immediately laid his head in her lap. "Well, you came all the way to England. I guess that's a start." Sensing his need for reassurance, she gave his hair a few gentle strokes. "You're not seeing Cynthia, are you?"

"Of course not!" Kyle pouted at her. "You think I'd come all this way if I was still with her? You are the one I want... and I'm more certain of that than ever."

Zoe started texting Ben. Kyle, who was still sitting at her feet, tried to sneak a peek at her phone.

"What are you saying to him?" Kyle asked.

"Kyle... what did I tell you?" Zoe sighed. "It's--"

"None of my business, I know." Kyle scraped himself off the ground and retreated to his chair. "It's just that... it kills me to think you've been spending time with some other guy! Do you really like him?"

To Ben: Are you really crying, or is that an exaggeration? You aren't mad at me, are you?

"Zoe!" Kyle shouted her name, hoping to steal her attention away from her phone. "Do you like him?"

"I do."

"Do you like me?" Kyle asked. "Or have you totally fallen out of love with me?"

Zoe laid on the bed and held the phone over her face, awaiting Ben's reply. "Of course I still have feelings for you, Kyle..."

"Then let's go out. Do you want to go out? I'm getting stir crazy in this hotel. Let's go get some coffee or something."

"Or tea," Zoe added. "I find I have a new fondness for tea." She heard Kyle chuckling, so she had to ask, "What's so funny?"

"You!" he exclaimed. "You sounded British just then."

"Did I?"

"You did!" Kyle exclaimed. "You run away to England for a month, and you're already picking up on the accent."

"Am I??" If Zoe had picked up on some of their inflections, she had failed to notice. "Anyway, do you want to go out for tea or what?"

"Sure."

Zoe grabbed her purse, headed for the door, and motioned for Kyle to come with her. "I can show you the proper way to make tea."

When Kyle met her at the door, he took her by the hand. In his best attempt at a British accent--which was a really poor attempt--Kyle said, "I'm quite certain you can, Miss Zoe."

* * *

Two hours, two scones, and one teapot later, Zoe had yet to receive a reply from Ben. Even though she would have heard an incoming text, she kept checking her phone every few minutes, hoping to hear from him.

Nothing.

"So..." Kyle poured himself another cup of tea. "Are you going to be spending the night with me tonight?"

"In your bed?!" If he told her aliens walked through the door, she wouldn't have looked more shocked. "Are you serious? No!"

"Well, you can't blame me for trying."

Zoe couldn't stop herself: she needed to send Ben another text. She didn't want to look desperate, but she was dying to hear from him.

To Ben: Well, you MUST be mad, because you're not writing back. I really want to hear from you, so please reply!

"Who are you texting now?" Kyle asked. "That guy again?"

"No," Zoe lied. "I made some other friends since I've been here."

"Oh yeah? What are their names?"

Kyle had always been the nosy sort, but he was really outdoing himself today. "Chris. James. Jordan..." Though they weren't quite what she would call friends, she liked to make herself sound popular.

"Jesus... are they all guys?!" Kyle gasped. "Those sound like guy names!"

"They are."

"So should I assume one of these guys will be my eventual replacement, or do I still have hope?"

"Chris is the little boy I looked after when I was working as a nanny," Zoe said with a chuckle. "I'm assuming my mom told you about that?"

"Yeah... she did."

"Which is why I'm shocked she didn't tell you I was living with Ben..." Zoe grabbed a third scone and slathered it with clotted cream. She knew she was probably killing herself with the consumption of so many sweet treats, but it was the least of her concerns.

"So you won't come to my room tonight..." Kyle said with a sigh. "Will you at least go out to dinner with me tomorrow?"

"I don't see why not."

"We can go somewhere nice. Someplace where we'll need reservations."

"I don't know about that. I wouldn't have anything to wear." She gobbled a third of her scone in a single bite. After she swallowed, she added, "I left most of my clothes at the Eastham's."

"The Eastham's?"

"I was working for the Easthams... as their nanny," she explained. "Ben is an Eastham."

Speaking of Ben, Zoe decided to send him yet another text.

To Ben: I really miss you. Why won't you write to me? Can I come see you soon? What are you doing tomorrow?

"So were you Ben's nanny too?" Kyle asked with a snort. "He's practically young enough."

"Kyle! Don't be an ass!"

"Sorry!"

"You have no right to get on my case, because you're the one who cheated on me with your ex-girlfriend!" With a sneer, she added, "maybe you should chase after her instead?"

To Ben: :(

* * *

When Ben pulled into the driveway, he was finally able to check Zoe's texts. All four of them. He parked the Vespa and unzipped his phone from the pocket of his jacket.

To Zoe: sorry, couldnt reply, I was traveling. to answer your questions, no, i'm not mad at u. 'devastated' is more like it. and yes i cried REAL tears after u left. :(

So he wouldn't look pitiful, he sent her another text right away.

To Zoe: only 2 tears tho.

To Ben: Aww, so I'm only worth two tears? You suck! When can I see you again?

Ben held the phone against his forehead, as if doing so would somehow help him string together a passionate sentence. There were a million questions swimming in his head, but he didn't know where to start. Was she with Kyle right now? Was she choosing Kyle? Did he have any hope whatsoever? He was imagining all sorts of things in his mind, each image more painful than the next.

To Zoe: sweetheart, you can come see me whenever you want. you know i would never turn u away.

He waited a few seconds, then sent another text. Ben knew it was an inappropriate question, but his curiosity was too much to bear.

To Zoe: you're not having sex with him, are you?

To Ben: NO I'm not having sex with him!!! Are you serious?!

To Zoe: sorry. its just that the thought of you w him is destroying my heart. :( i will be busy 4 a lil while & won't be able to respond. i will write later.

Ben turned off his phone and returned it to his pocket. Then he headed in the direction of the house.

His brother's house.

Chapter Twenty Five

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Someone just told me Buckingham Palace was built on the site of a brothel. Do you think the ghosts of prostitutes are hanging out in the queen's bedroom?

"LEWIS!" Ben pounded on the door a third time. "Lewis, answer the door!"

Finally, he heard his brother's response from the other side. "Ben, go away! You're not welcome here!"

"Yeah? Well I'm not leaving until you face me!" Ben slammed his fist against the door as hard as he could. "Open the door!"

"Bugger off!"

"OPEN THE DOOR!"

"No! You're mental!"

"I just want to talk to you!"

"You expect me to believe that?!" Lewis shouted through the door. "I know why you're here!"

"Oh? And why am I here?" When Lewis didn't respond right away, Ben asked, "What would mum think... if she knew you wouldn't talk to your own brother?!"

After a long pause, Lewis squeaked, "if I open the door, you promise not to hit me?"

"Of course I'm not going to hit you!"

A few seconds later, the door opened about an inch. Not one to miss his opportunity, Ben shoved open the door and forced his way into the house. As soon as he was inside, his fist connected with Lewis' jaw.

"Ow!" the older brother whined. "You lied!"

Ben grabbed Lewis by the scruff of his shirt and slammed him against the wall. "What did you do to Zoe?!"

"What do you mean?!"

"I want to hear it from you!" Ben kept his brother pinned to the wall. Lewis tried to break free, and while he wasn't a small man, he lacked his younger brother's strength and fury. "Tell me what you did to her!"

"I didn't do anything!"

"Don't lie to me!" He pulled Lewis forward and slammed him against the wall again. "I saw the bruises. Tell me!"

"Bruises?" Lewis raised an eyebrow. "She has bruises? I didn't think I--"

"You didn't think you what?!"

"Benjamin, let go! I can't talk to you when you're screaming in my face!"

Ben released his brother's collar and raked a hand through his hair. He stayed close to Lewis, ready to stop him if he tried to flee. "You have some explaining to do."

"Do I?" Lewis smoothed his hands over his shirt, trying to reclaim his lost dignity.

"Yes! Just tell me what you did to her!"

"Didn't she tell you?" Lewis walked across the room, to an end table, where he poured himself a glass of liquor. "It certainly sounds like she did... the squealer."

"You attacked her," Ben accused him. "Admit it."

"I wouldn't call it that." Lewis downed his liquor in a single swig, then slammed the glass against the table. "Is that what she's calling it?"

"Are you denying it?"

"I am denying it, because I'm entirely sure she wanted it," Lewis said. "Why else would she walk around in those little shorts, bending over and the like. She was teasing me. She was begging for it."

"You bastard."

"Please, Ben. You know I'm right." Lewis leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest.

"So she wanted you to wrestle her to the bed and give her bruises?" Ben snorted. "Is that why she ran away and had to call me in the middle of the night?!"

"Oh, so that's what happened to her. Is she with you right now?"

"No. She's with her ex-fiance."

"Ha. That's amusing." Lewis rolled his icy blue eyes at his brother. "So neither of us gets the girl."

"I'm more amused by the fact that you have no one," Ben retorted. "You kicked me out. Gemma left, she took Chris, and Zoe ran away. You've been abandoned by everyone, and you deserve it."

"That's a bit cold."

"Well, it's true. I was going to come over here and kick the shit out of you, but then I realized it must be a daily punishment... to wake up and realize you're all alone."

"I'm not alone!" Lewis exclaimed. "You know I have loads of friends. It won't take me long to find a replacement for Gemma... and Zoe."

"Well... in that case..." Ben clenched a fist and sent it sailing toward Lewis' face. His knuckles landed on his brother's nose, and he thought he felt a crunch. "I guess I won't feel bad about doing that then."

And with that, Ben headed out of the house, leaving his whimpering brother behind.

* * *

Zoe dipped into her purse and pulled out her cell phone. When Kyle saw what she was doing, he grabbed her wrist and lowered her hand--and the phone--back to her purse.

"Nuh uh," Kyle protested. "No texting tonight."

"But--"

"No buts," he insisted. "Tonight, it's all about us. I just want to focus on you and me..."

With a sigh, Zoe zipped up her purse and set it aside. It was her second day with Kyle, and all she could think about was Ben. What was he doing? Did he miss her? Did he hit on other girls when she wasn't around? Her first night at the Savoy had her tossing and turning, wishing she was back in Benjamin's arms. After York, she was getting used to having him beside her as she slept.

"How do you like your pasta?" Kyle asked.

Zoe looked down at her manicotti, which she had barely touched. "Good," she said--and it wasn't a lie. The food was delicious, but her nerves were so on edge that she didn't have an appetite.

"I'd like to take you on a tour of London." As he spoke, Kyle sawed off a bite of his lasagna and tried to feed it to her. Zoe turned her head away, so he stuffed the fork in his own mouth. "Surely you haven't seen everything this city has to offer."

"Not even close."

"Good!" Kyle exclaimed. "Because I was looking at some pamphlets earlier today, trying to decide where we could go. I wanted to stop by the Tower of London, but that hardly seems romantic. Didn't they execute people there?"

"Yeah. Like Anne Boleyn."

"See? It would be interesting, but not the sort of place you'd take your girlfriend if you're trying to win her back."

Zoe was tempted to point out that she was hardly Kyle's girlfriend, but she didn't want to ruin the mood. The restaurant was somewhat fancy, with candles at every table, and soft opera music playing in the background. It might have been romantic, if not for the fact that she was thinking about Benjamin every few seconds.

She didn't even want to go to a fancy restaurant, but that was the only thing that would satisfy Kyle, who always had to have the best of everything. And that's why she was wearing a Valentino dress and Manolo Blahniks: her newest gifts from Kyle. Zoe wasn't into name brands, but she wasn't going to complain if her ex-fiance wanted to spoil her a bit.

"What about the British Museum?" Kyle asked. "Have you been there?"

"Nope."

"Oh wait! I know! I should take you to see a play. It's been a long time since I've been to London, but I know the West End shows are comparable to Broadway. What would you like to see?"

Zoe shrugged. She stuffed a piece of manicotti in her mouth, and her tongue tingled at the burst of tomato flavor.

"Why don't I buy some surprise tickets? I'm sure it's better to book them in advance, so our seats might not be the best, but..." Kyle reached across the table to hold Zoe's hand. "Doesn't that sound like fun?"

"I like theatre."

"Good." He pulled her hand across the table so he could brush a kiss across her knuckles. "You know, you're awfully quiet tonight."

"I am?"

"Yeah. And you're being awfully formal with me," Kyle said with a frown. "You're glad I'm here, aren't you? You're glad I came?"

"Uh huh." Zoe had to force a smile.

"You know, Zoe, you're the love of my life," Kyle said. "I would have traveled around the world twenty times to be with you again."

"Really?"

"Really!" he exclaimed. "You still love me, don't you?"

"I--"

"I know you still love me. I can see it in your eyes."

The waiter returned to their table and dropped off the bill. Her manicotti alone was around twenty-five pounds, so she was afraid to look. It was a good thing Kyle was paying.

"Zoe... I want to be with you again," Kyle said. "I want to wake up in the morning and know you're mine again."

"Kyle..."

"You want that, don't you?" He raised her hand to his lips again, kissing it several times. "I want to stare into your sleepy eyes every morning. I want to wake up and see your hair fanning across the pillow. I want to smell your perfume, taste your lips whenever I want to. I love you more than I've ever loved anything."

Kyle paused, as if he expected her to say something, but she didn't know how to respond. As moving as his words were, they failed to stir her emotions.

"I want to take you home, back to the US," Kyle went on. "I want you to be my girlfriend again."

"Umm..." Zoe's tongue slipped out of her mouth, moistening her lips. Her throat was dry, her head was spinning, and her hands were covered in sweat. The words were on the tip of her tongue, but she couldn't bring herself to say them.

"What do you think, Zoe?" Kyle continued. "Do you want to be with me again? Do you want to give us another chance?"

"I--" She had to say it. She owed it to him. "I can't."

"Why not?" Kyle pouted. "Don't you love me anymore?"

"I do!" Zoe exclaimed. "And a part of me will always love you, Kyle. But I can't be with you..."

"Why not?" he repeated pitifully.

Zoe looked down at her purse, where her phone was hidden away. She wanted so badly to check it, to see if she had any texts from Ben. She wished she was back in his flat, that tiny little place in Camden. At that moment, Zoe knew exactly what she wanted. She had never been more certain of anything in her life.

So she said, "I already have a boyfriend."

Chapter Twenty Six

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Sometimes I don't "get" British humor. Maybe because they spell it with a U?

Ben spent the last twenty four hours moping around his flat. Ever since Zoe left, he had been feeling out of sorts, like a malaise had taken over every cell in his body. All he wanted to do was lay on the couch, eat Maltesers, and watch the telly. It felt like he had just gone through a nasty break-up, except Zoe wasn't quite his girlfriend. And he couldn't remember any break-ups that had left him feeling so miserable.

There was only one explanation for his mood: Zoe Manet had broken his heart.

She hadn't even responded to his texts in several hours, which led him to believe she was too busy with Kyle to give him a second thought. Ben snatched his phone off the table and decided to check his voice mail. Maybe she had tried calling him instead?

Ben had two messages, and the first one was from James.

"Hey, you twat... why aren't you answering your phone? Jordan and I were going to go to the pub. We want to go with you, but you're fucking impossible to get in contact with. Jordan's got a new girlfriend, yeah? Don't tell him I said this, but she's a bit of a minger. Well... fuck off then."

To his utter devastation, his second message wasn't from Zoe either.

"Benjamin? This is your mum. I talked to Lewis the other day and he told me you attacked him! Now, I know you two haven't been getting along, and I know he tossed you out of his house, but... there's no excuse for that sort of behavior. I don't quite know what's going on between you boys, but you should apologize to your brother."

"Like hell I will," Ben murmured under his breath. He started to send Zoe another text, but he decided against it. If he sent another message, it would be his third one in a row, and he didn't want to look desperate.

Although, he was quite desperate at the moment. He was desperate to see her, desperate to hold her, desperate to hear her voice. It started as a harmless flirtation and ended up strangling his heart.

Ben popped another Malteser in his mouth and tried to imagine how pitiful he must look. James would really take the piss out of him if he could see him now.

A knock on the door shook him from his depressing daydreams. Ben scraped himself off the couch and went to the door. He was too weary to care about the state of his appearance, his severely mussed hair, or his half-tucked shirt with a hole in the sleeve. Had he known it was Zoe behind the door, he might have tried to tidy himself up.

"Zoe..." Ben raked his eyes over her body. At the moment, she was the complete opposite of him. She was all dolled up.

"Hi." Zoe clutched her oversized purse to her chest. "Can I come in?"

"Of course."

Zoe was surprised to see his flat in a state of disarray. Clothes were strewn across the floor, the bed was unmade, and a pint of half-melted ice cream was dripping all over the coffee table. She was gone for less than two days, but he already managed to muck it up. "It isn't a bad time, is it?"

"Of course not," Ben said. "It's never a bad time for you. Sorry the place is such a mess." He raked a hand through his hair a few times, hoping it would make him look a bit more presentable. "And sorry I look like shit."

"You do not," Zoe protested. She actually liked him a bit disheveled, as if his hair was adorably wind-tossed. "You always look good."

"This shirt must be a million years old," Ben said, ripping a loose string from the tatty sleeve of his shirt. "I think I've had it since I hit puberty."

"And when was that? Three years ago?" Zoe teased.

"Ha ha. Very funny. Go ahead and make wisecracks about my age." Ben rolled his eyes.

"I'm just teasing."

"I know." Ben's eyes wandered down the length of her body, over her stylish rouge dress and fancy shoes. Her cocoa hair had been curled, and pinned in a loose style. "You look stunning, by the way."

"Aww. Thanks." Zoe could feel the heat rushing to her cheeks.

"I mean it. You look amazing," Ben insisted. "Where'd you get that dress?"

"From... Kyle," she reluctantly admitted.

"Ah. That's what I thought. Anyway... can I get you a drink or something? A cup of tea? Glass of... shit, I don't think I have anything." Ben went to the refrigerator and pulled it open. "Well, it looks like I have orange juice."

Zoe's brow furrowed in disapproval. Two days ago, she was living with him--now he was treating her like a common guest. "I'm okay."

"You sure?"

"Yeah." She sunk to the couch and started removing her shoes. They were probably the most expensive shoes she had ever owned, but they were destroying her feet. When she saw the blister on her heel, she drew a sharp breath.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah... but I think I have a blister."

"Do you want me to get you a sticking plaster?"

His question was met with a blank stare. "A what?"

"A... band-aid," Ben corrected himself. "I think that's what you'd call it."

"No... now that my shoes are off, I think I'll be okay."

Ben sat on the couch next to Zoe. He leaned forward and observed the offending shoe. "Those are also a gift from the fiance, I take it?"

"Yeah," Zoe said. "But he's not my fiance."

"Ex-fiance," Ben amended. Under his breath, he added, "and thank god for that..." He scooped her blistered foot off the floor and put it in his lap. "So is this really what women want? Expensive shoes that are too painful to wear?"

"I don't know about other women, but it's not what I want."

"And that dress? If it was up to me, I'd put you in a pair of lounge pants and a hoodie. Don't get me wrong... that dress looks amazing on you, but you don't look very comfortable." His hands encompassed her ankle, cradling her injured foot. "Maybe we should remove the dress as well?"

"Maybe we should."

"We should?!" Ben's eyes were wide with astonishment. "Really?"

"Sure." Zoe unzipped the dress and lifted her arms above her head. "Take it off."

"Are you serious? Or is this some kind of test?"

"Nope. Why would it be a test? It's not like you haven't seen me in my underwear before." Zoe thrust her entire body in Ben's direction. "Take it off."

Ben grabbed the hem of her dress and started peeling it upward. He lifted it slowly, because he half-expected her to change her mind. When the dress was over her stomach, his throat erupted with a guttural rumble of approval. He raised the garment over her head and tossed it on the ground. Her underwear, sexy and slightly sheer, was as red as her dress.

"Wow..." he croaked. "That is... wow."

"I'm glad you approve."

"Approve doesn't even begin to describe it," Ben said. "I'm practically slathering at the mouth. I still can't believe you're really here." He cupped her cheek in his hand, and she nuzzled her head against his palm. "You show up at my flat and start stripping your clothes off... it feels like I'm living a dream."

"It's not a dream. At least, I don't think it's a dream," Zoe said. "Maybe you should pinch my butt to be sure?" Ben didn't need to be asked twice. He gave her a little tweak, and she let out a squeal. "Nope. Not a dream."

"So, why are you here? Things not working out with Captain America?"

"We went out to dinner, but... I dunno. I just felt like I needed to get away."

"So you were out with him tonight," Ben observed. "And you're wearing sexy knickers. In my experience, women only wear sexy knickers when they're expecting to get shagged, soo... please tell me you weren't expecting to shag him."

Zoe clenched a fist and planted it in Ben's arm. "No! You really think I'd have sex with him?!" For good measure, she punched his other arm too. "If you really must know, Kyle bought these for me too."

"He's buying you sexy lingerie?" Ben asked, his brow pinched with annoyance.

"Well... if you recall, I left most of my clothes at Lewis' place. At some point, I might have let it slip that I didn't have many pairs of underwear, soo..." Zoe shrugged. "Kyle bought me some."

"He's got good taste, I'll give him that," Ben said, a statement supported by the fact that he couldn't tear his eyes away from her.

"He bought me the knickers," Zoe said, giggling at her usage of the British slang, "but you're the one who gets to see me in them. That should give you some satisfaction, right?"

"Oh, it does! Believe me. Zoe..." Ben coiled an arm around her waist and dragged her onto his lap. "I was miserable until you arrived."

"Were you?"

"Absolutely. Completely miserable. In fact, I can't remember the last time I was so miserable," Ben said.

"Really?"

"Actually... I was nine years old. I didn't get the dog I wanted," Ben said with a chuckle. "It made for a miserable Christmas morning, as I'm sure you can imagine."

"We should get a dog for the flat. Are the tenants allowed to have pets?"

"Wait!" Ben laid a finger over her lips. "Did I hear you correctly? We should get a dog for the flat? The word we would imply that we were both living here."

"Well..." Zoe ran a hand through his hair, which was softer than a man's hair should have been. She couldn't resist the temptation to touch it again and again. "I was hoping you'd let me move back in?"

"Oh really?"

"Mm-hmm."

"So what happened to Kyle?"

"I don't think that's going to work out," Zoe said. "Besides, I told him I had a boyfriend, so--"

"You told him what?!"

"You don't mind, do you? In fact, I was hoping you might like to make it official. Maybe I'm assuming too much, but... I think it would be nice if you were my boyfriend."

"Are you serious?"

The tone of his voice was sharp, which made her a bit apprehensive. "Well..."

"Of course I want to be your boyfriend," Ben exclaimed. "Honestly? I never thought I'd see the day. I never thought you'd get over all your hang-ups and reservations and excuses and--"

It was Zoe's turn to put a finger over Ben's lips. "Just shut up and snog me."

As soon as her finger slid away, he let out a chuckle. "Snog you? It sounds so cute to hear you say that in your American accent."

"At least you called me an American and not a yank," Zoe pointed out. "Now... are you going to kiss me or what?"

Ben captured her mouth, claimed her with his tongue. Zoe kissed him hard, as if kissing him was the only thing that could save her from certain death. She captured his lower lip between her teeth, which made him chuckle.

"Boyfriend," she said, tapping him on the nose.

"Girlfriend," he countered, suckling her neck. "So... you're sitting on my lap in your knickers. We're snogging. I just have one question..."

"And what's that?"

"Are you going to make me the luckiest man in the world, or are you leaving me blue-balled again?"

"Umm... hmmmm..." Zoe tapped her chin as she considered his question. "I'm thinking... blue-balled. We don't want to move too fast, do we?"

"We don't?" His voice squeaked.

"No. I have to leave you something to look forward to!"

"I already have something to look forward to." Ben shoved down her bra strap and kissed her bare shoulder. He might have been pushing his luck, but he couldn't resist. "Waking up next to you. Every day."

Chapter Twenty Seven

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Well, I'm officially dating the hottest "bloke" in the world. So you should understand if I don't feel like blogging too often. I have more important things to do. ;)

When she woke up next to Ben the next morning, Zoe was sorely lacking adornment. All she was wearing was a t-shirt--one of Ben's--and a pair of cotton knickers. They weren't even cute knickers; they had a gaudy floral design that was better-suited for a grandmother.

"These are seriously hideous." Zoe lifted the shirt, flashing a glimpse of her panties. "I don't think I'll be turning you on in my granny panties."

"Oh, I'm turned on right now... I can promise you that," Ben countered. "I think they're quite cute."

Her brow was furrowed with disbelief. "Really?"

"Absolutely. They're ridiculously sexy."

"Really? Then you have some strange tastes, boy." Zoe grabbed her phone and jumped back in bed. She pounced on top of Ben and straddled his waist, which had him painfully aroused in an instant. "Let's see... I have a text from Gemma."

"Ew... seriously?"

"Yeah. I asked her if she could bring Chris for a visit, since it's still the weekend," Zoe said. "I thought we could all go out to lunch together... well, minus Gemma..."

"You're straddling my body," Ben pointed out, "so you'll have to forgive me if I didn't hear a word you said."

"Ben!" She swatted his arm. "Concentrate, okay? I'll read her text. Yes, I can bring him by this afternoon. I needed to visit a friend in London anyway. You can take him out, and I'll be back to pick him up at the end of the day."

"So you ladies have been making plans... unbeknownst to me?"

"No, not really. I mean... I just texted her a few minutes ago and asked her if it'd be okay. You don't mind, do you?"

"No. I'm a good uncle. Why would I mind?" Ben cupped his hands on her butt, which must have been fair game because she didn't chastise him. "So, what time are they supposed to arrive? Do we have time for breakfast?"

Zoe didn't respond right away. She was too busy reading another text. From Kyle.

To Zoe: I'm going to stay in London until you change your mind. When can I see you again?

"Zoe?" He tried tickling her stomach to get her attention, which worked a little too well. She dropped her phone and rolled off the mattress. She landed on the ground with a thud. "Are you alright?"

"I'll live."

"Good. Now what do you think about breakfast?" Ben rose from the bed and scooped her off the ground, into his arms. He started carrying her around the flat, like a groom carrying his bride. "Do I have time to make breakfast for you?"

"Well... Gemma said they wouldn't be coming 'til the afternoon, so I think we have time." Zoe nuzzled her cheek against Ben's shoulder, which made her heart tingle with content. "But... did you say you were going to make breakfast? That makes me nervous."

"You shouldn't be, considering the fact that our breakfast options are currently cereal and..." Ben placed Zoe on the kitchen counter and checked one of the cupboards. "Cereal. As well as cereal, if that tickles your fancy."

"Cereal it is then!" Zoe chuckled. "What the heck is Weetabix? Is that like Mini Wheats?"

"I have no idea." Ben grabbed two bowls and filled them up. Before he could make it to the fridge to get the milk, Zoe grabbed his arm and reeled him toward her. As her fingers coiled through his hair, she smashed her mouth against his. His lips ventured down, trailing kissing across her neck and collarbone.

"Ben..." she whispered.

"Hmm?"

"If I'm going to stay here, we really need to do some grocery shopping."

"I just made out with you, and you're talking about shopping?!" Ben rolled his amber eyes. "You are so silly."

* * *

Chris' first request was that they visit the Tower of London, the historic fortress on the River Thames. They toured the medieval walls and moat and keep, and Chris was especially intrigued by the Bloody Tower, which apparently had a history of murder.

"What's the deal with kids these days?" Zoe observed. Ben was holding her hand as they toured the tower. It must have been haunted, because she kept feeling mysterious prickles on the back of her neck. "It's like they're desensitized or something."

"And what is it with nannies these days?" Ben fired back at her. "They're American, and not to mention, ridiculously sexy."

"I'm not a nanny anymore," she pointed out.

"That's not what Chris thinks," Ben said. And it was true. Ever since he arrived, Chris had referred to her as "my nanny" at least twice.

Chris, who was skipping around a few paces ahead of them, turned around and asked, "So how many people were prisoners here?"

"Uh..." Zoe looked over at Ben and gave him a nudge. "You're English. You should know."

"I have no idea," Ben confessed. "But I know they kept a lot of important people here. Jane Grey. Queen Elizabeth. People like that."

They stumbled across the site of the scaffold, where the executions took place.

"This is where heads rolled," Ben said. "Anne Boleyn's bloody head might have been right next to my feet."

"History, as described by Benjamin Eastham," Zoe teased him. "It's always invigorating, that's for sure."

"Is it true that you stay alive for a few seconds after they cut off your head?" Chris asked, bobbing up and down in grisly excitement. "Imagine what it would be like to look up and see your headless body!"

"How the hell would anyone be able to confirm that? It's not like you can ask someone who got their head chopped off," Ben said.

"But it's what I heard!"

"Well..." Ben started, "when we happen upon the ghost of Katherine Howard, you can ask her if she remembers her dripping corpse."

Zoe rolled her eyes. Dripping corpses and rolling heads hardly seemed like an appropriate topic to discuss with an eight-year-old, but she decided to let Ben use his own judgment.

Chris pointed across the way, where a uniformed guard was wandering the grounds. "Hey... why are they called Beefeaters?" he asked, referring to the colorful moniker given to the Tower's Yeoman Warders.

"Umm..." Zoe looked over at Ben again. He seemed to have an answer for everything, though his answers were a bit lackluster.

"I guess... they liked beef?" Ben offered with a chuckle.

Chris' nose puckered. "Really?"

"Ugh... Ben!" Zoe gave her new boyfriend another playful slap on the arm. "Stop teaching him bogus history!"

"It's not bogus. I'm sure they did like beef. Who doesn't like beef?"

After touring the Tower from top to bottom, they followed Ben to a hole-in-the-wall cafe at London's East End. Ben bought an ice cream for Chris, and a slice of cake to split with Zoe. Ben fed her a bite, then followed it up with a kiss, which had Chris yelling, "Gross!"

They ended the day at Ben's flat, because Chris was dying to play video games with them. They played a realistic-looking racing game on the Xbox360, with a title Zoe couldn't remember to save her life. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't really catch on to the mechanics. Her car kept scraping against every wall, at every turn. During an embarrassing moment of shame, Zoe's car flipped over and burst into flames. When Ben suggested they play on "easy mode," Zoe decided to bow out entirely. She would just let the boys play to their hearts' content.

While the gamers played, Zoe decided to check her email. When she saw she had an email from her mother, she could almost predict what she would say.

Zoe,

I just got off the phone with Kyle. He says you refused to come home! Don't you know how much we miss you? Kyle tells me he's sorry and I believe him. He seems so sincere, and honey, he sounded like he was on the verge of tears!

To make matters worse, he tells me you've hooked up with a 23-year-old??? Honey, what are you thinking? It's too early for a midlife crisis. I don't know what's going on in your head, but you have to know this won't end well. He's just going to--

Zoe had seen enough. Without reading another word, she snapped the laptop shut and turned her attention back to the game, only to discover they had paused the race. Ben wanted to make tea, which meant Zoe and Chris were alone on the couch.

"You like my uncle, don't you?" Chris observed.

"I..." He was technically her boyfriend now, so there was no sense in trying to hide it. "I do. And you like him too?"

"Well, yeah. He's alright," Chris said with a shrug. "He's nicer than my dad."

Zoe had to agree with him there. "You don't like your dad?"

"No. Not really. He ignores me. He's a twat."

Zoe knew she should probably reprimand the boy for using that word to describe his father, but since he was using it on Lewis, she couldn't find it in her heart to protest. "What about your mom?"

"She's nice... sometimes. But she doesn't really like you," Chris said. "Sorry."

"Oh, you don't need to apologize. I know it's true." Zoe turned around and tried to find Ben. When she met his gaze, he flashed her a dimple-ridden smile, and his golden brown eyes wrenched her stomach. She didn't care what her mom thought--she knew she had the best boyfriend in the world. "How is it going at your new school?"

"Better, I guess," Chris said with a shrug. She didn't need him to elaborate--at least he wasn't getting bullied anymore. "I really miss you, Zoe. I wish you were still my nanny."

Zoe wrapped her arms around him, capturing him in an unwilling hug. Even though he was sneering, Chris coiled an arm around Zoe and ceded to the affection.

"Well, you can still think of me as your nanny... if you want to," she said. "Or better yet, why not think of me as a friend? Wouldn't you like that?"

"Umm..." Chris tilted his head as he considered her suggestion. He stared at her for several seconds, blankly, as if trying to decide if she was friend material. "I guess that'd be alright."

Chapter Twenty Eight

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

On the telly, there was a program about "flogging" antiques. And here's silly old me, thinking they were going to beat the crap out of old tables.

When she came out of the bathroom wearing her red Valentino, Benjamin groaned. "Uuuuooo... you're really wearing your fiance's dress to the theatre?!"

"It's not my fiance's dress."

"Alright then. Your ex-fiance's dress," Ben corrected himself.

"No, I mean... it's my dress. It just so happens that Kyle bought it for me," Zoe said. "It's the only thing I own that's nice enough to wear to the theatre."

"But there's no dress code! You can wear a jumper and a nice pair of trousers!" Ben gestured toward his own outfit: khaki pants and a long-sleeved white pullover. "You look a lot better than I do."

"Ben..." Zoe stepped up to him and slid her arms around his waist. "It isn't possible to look better than you do. You could show up in pajama pants and a ripped shirt and you'd still be the most attractive guy in the room."

"I really need to get a job so I can buy you fancy things..."

"I don't need fancy things," Zoe tried to tell him. "If it bothers you that much, I can change clothes."

"No. It's alright. You look great. You really do." Ben snatched the tickets off the table--two seats in the mezzanine circle at Les Miserables. "Well, Gorgeous, are you ready to go?"

"Yep."

They held hands on the way out of the flat, then they rode the Tube into Leicester Square. The Les Miserables theatre wasn't too far, but they had to jostle their way through an immense crowd to get there. Ben gripped her hand tightly, fearful they might get separated.

They arrived at the theatre twenty minutes too early, so they queued up outside and awaited entry. Zoe laid her cheek against Ben's arm, and he kissed the crown of her head.

"Seriously, though, I do need a get a job," Ben whispered to her. "I want to be a reliable boyfriend."

"Doesn't your dad give you money?"

"Well... yeah. But I don't want to be a sponge forever," Ben said. "I'm on the verge of getting a job at the Tethered Lion."

"Uh... and what's the Tethered Lion?"

"The pub where James and Jordan and I like to hang out. Of course, it'll only be temporary... until I can find a proper job. At the moment, it seems there's a lot of competition in London, even for an Oxford grad. But I want to make you proud of me."

"I am proud of you," Zoe assured him. "Girls walk by and think, wow... look at that girl with the super-hot boyfriend. And it makes me realize how lucky I am."

"Please," Ben scoffed. "No one's looking at me. And if they are looking in this direction, they're looking at you... my stunning girlfriend."

Zoe rolled her eyes at him. "Anyway, don't stress out too much. I don't have a job either. I guess I need to start looking for something too. But really... who wants to talk about unemployment right now? We're supposed to be having fun."

"Sorry."

"Let's talk about something more interesting," Zoe suggested. "Like... tell me something about yourself. Tell me something I don't already know."

"I think you know a lot about me."

Zoe shook her head. "No. Not really. You've been alive for twenty-three years, but I've only known you for several weeks. You couldn't have possibly told me everything there is to know about you."

"Well..." Ben let go of Zoe's hand and started scratching his head. "What do you want to know?"

"I want to know everything about you. Like... how many girlfriends have you had?"

"Wow. You get straight to the point, don't you?" Ben asked with a chuckle. "How many girlfriends do you think I've had?"

"If I had to guess? Hmm..." Zoe stared into his eyes for several seconds, hoping to pick up on a cue that would give it away. "A good-looking guy like you has probably had loads of girlfriends."

"Not really. I've had three."

"Three. Oh... that's not so bad."

"What about you, Zoe?" Ben asked. "How many serious ex-boyfriends do you have? I already had the pleasure of meeting one of them... unfortunately."

Zoe answered his question with a nudge. "I don't have to answer that! We're talking all about you, not about me!"

"That hardly seems fair!" Ben crossed his arms over his chest in mock offense. "I think you should have to answer the same questions I do. If you want to hear any more Benjamin Eastham fun facts, you'll have to reciprocate a bit."

"Alright..." Zoe capsized. "Apart from Kyle, I've had three other ex-boyfriends. So that's a total of four."

"And did you like these blokes?"

"If you think I'm going to answer that, you've got another thing coming." Zoe stood on her tiptoes and tried to peer over the heads of the people in front of her. They still hadn't opened the doors to the theatre, and the line hadn't budged. "Okay... tell me something else. Tell me something surprising."

"Surprising, hm? Well... when I was sixteen or seventeen, I was an extra in an episode of Doctor Who," Ben said.

"Wow, really?" Zoe had never seen an episode of Doctor Who in her life, but she had heard enough about it to be impressed. "Did you have a speaking part?"

"No. I was just mulling around in the background."

"And where can I see this episode?" Zoe asked. "At this point, it's like required viewing."

"I'm sure my mum has it."

"Do you think your mom would like me?" Before Ben had a chance to reply, Zoe made her own conclusion. "Probably not. I mean, I'm 10 years older than you, and I'm an American. She'd probably crap her pants."

"Well... I'm not sure about the crapping part. She's over sixty, but to the best of my knowledge, she hasn't lost control of her bowels," Ben laughed. "Anyway, I'm sure she'd like you. What's not to like? To her, we'd just be two young people in love."

"Awww..." Zoe hugged his arm to her chest. "Are you trying to say you love me?"

"Maybe," he said with a grin. "Anyway, if I'm not mistaken, I believe it's time for a Zoe fun fact?"

"Hmm... I dunno. I'm not that interesting."

"This is your game, love," Ben reminded her. "You have to think of something."

"Well, I like to paint. I took a lot of art classes when I was in school."

"Are you good at it?"

"I like to think I am," Zoe said. "My mom has a little gallery of my paintings in her house."

"I'd like to see this gallery." The line inched forward, so Ben slid an arm around Zoe's back and guided her toward the theatre. Unfortunately, an inch was about as far as they moved. "Do you think your mum would like me?"

Zoe paused for a few seconds, hoping he wouldn't be offended by her silence. Her mom was solidly pro-Kyle. Zoe wasn't sure her mom would be able to keep her mind open enough to accept anyone new. "Uh... yeah. I think she would."

"So, what sort of things do you paint?"

"Portraits, mostly."

"Ever painted anyone in the nude?"

"Uh... no, actually," Zoe admitted. "That's probably something every artist should tackle at some point, don't you think? Maybe I could... paint... you?" She didn't look him in the eye as she made her request, for fear that he might catch her blushing.

"Zoe, Zoe, Zoe..." Ben clicked his tongue in playful castigation. "Are you trying to get me naked?"

"Maaaaybe..." she shyly confessed. "Would that be such a bad thing?"

"Love, if you want to get me naked, you need only to ask." Ben must have been speaking too loudly, because the man in front of them turned around and flashed a sneer.

Zoe was saved from further humiliation. The doors opened, and the theatregoers trickled inside. As soon as Zoe and Ben were seated, she laid her hand on his lap, on his leg. Ben grinned, pleased that she was cozying up to him.

When the show began, Zoe was immediately overcome with a case of chills. The booming baritone of Jean Valjean had her transfixed from beginning to end, and the actors performed to thunderous applause. Zoe wanted to give them a standing ovation, but she didn't want to be the only one out of her seat. After putting on such a spectacle, the actors deserved to have the audience on their feet.

Zoe whispered to Ben, "Do British people not give standing ovations?"

"I guess we're picky critics here," Ben said.

"You didn't enjoy the show?!"

"No, I thought it was brilliant." He pulled her toward him and kissed her on the head. "Now... where should we go to get some painting supplies?"

* * *

Ben had his shirt over his head before she even finished setting up the easel. Zoe had changed into her pajamas, as it would have been a tragedy to get paint on her two thousand dollar dress. When she looked over at her bare-chested boyfriend, she could feel the air sucked out of her lungs. From the waist-up, she already knew Ben was perfection. Her heart was hammering beneath her chest, pounding in anticipation of his naked body.

"So, how do you want me to pose?"

"A-any way you want," she stammered. Heat was coursing through her body, flushing her neck. With the easel ready to go, Zoe started mixing her paints. She needed a good match for his skin tone, a light beige base with a touch of bronze.

"Should I get naked now?"

"Umm... any time you're ready."

Ben pulled down his trousers and kicked them aside, then started fumbling with the waistband of his boxer briefs. Zoe stared at him, wide-eyed, bewitched by the sight of his perfect abs and Apollo's belt. If he moved closer, she would have been tempted to touch him--to lick him. After all, his chest was practically made for licking.

In one fluid motion, he rolled down his underwear and stepped out of them. He stood in front of her, completely naked, and she was a bit worried she might pass out. Her eyes were locked on his nether regions, which was a pleasantly impressive sight.

Ben raised an arm and leaned against the wall. "How about this?" he asked. "Or did you have another pose in mind?"

"It's... good." Her hand wobbled as she dipped her brush in the paint. "You, uh... you look good, by the way."

"Do I?" She was further addled by his dimpled grin. "You're so cute."

"Cute?!"

"Yeah. Your reaction... it's adorable," he said. "You're fidgeting, blushing. You would think it's the first time you've seen a naked body."

"Well, it's the first time I've seen you naked."

"And you're painting me, which means you're going to have to stare at my penis," he pointed out.

"Ben!"

"What?"

"You don't have to bring that to my attention," Zoe said. She could feel beads of perspiration breaking out all over her forehead.

"After this, maybe I can paint you?" he suggested.

"Can you paint?"

"Well... I can paint, I just can't do it well." Ben watched her as she dabbled with her paints, his gaze unwavering. "But I need some kind of an excuse to get you out of your clothes. Will you consider it?"

"Mmm..." Zoe pursed her lips. "Maybe."

"If you let me paint you, I'll let you see my butt," Ben said with a chuckle. "Tell me that's not an enticing offer!"

"I said I'd think about it."

Zoe was surprised she could concentrate well enough to produce a portrait that looked half-way decent. She painted for over and hour, and the end result was a satisfactory likeness of Ben. When she finished, she waved him over so he could have a look at it. Ben stood right next to her, as naked as ever. By that time, she had been staring at him in the nude for so long, she wasn't fazed by the fact that he was completely naked and within arm's length.

"I painted it quickly, so it's not as good as it could be," she said.

"Wow. I think it's brilliant," Ben praised her. "Is my penis really as big as that?"

"Ben!" She swatted his arm.

"Ow? What was that for?!"

"Of course that would be the first thing you'd notice," Zoe rolled her eyes at him. "The penis."

"Well, I think you did a phenomenal job. That's a smashing portrait."

Zoe set the portrait aside to dry, then loaded the easel with another blank canvas. "Alright, are you ready to paint me?"

"Um... did I hear you correctly?" Ben watched in shock as Zoe started tearing off her clothes. The shirt was first to go, and the pajama pants followed. "You really want me to paint you in the nude?"

"Sure. I got to see you naked, so it only seems fair." She unhooked her bra, and the straps slid down her shoulders. "Unless you've changed your mind?"

"Fuck no!" Ben's uncouth response made him wince. "That is to say... of course I would love to paint you."

"Good." Zoe took off her bra and tossed it in his direction. His eyes were magnetized to her bare breasts, and it wasn't long before he had the biggest erection of his life. He shimmied behind the easel in an attempt to hide himself.

"Now. uh... the knickers," Ben demanded. "I'm going to need those too."

"Of course." Zoe peeled them down slowly, over her hips, down her thighs. When he realized she was completely shaven, his eyes bulged. "Well, what do you think?"

"You look... amazing," he said, a bit breathlessly. "It's like... this is the moment I've been waiting for my entire life."

"Aww, that's sweet." Naked Zoe sat on the sofa and tried to strike an alluring pose. She leaned back a bit, laid a hand on her hip, and parted her legs ever-so-slightly. She could feel his gaze invading her, drinking in every exposed inch of her feminine skin.

"There is no way I'm going to concentrate long enough to pull this off," Ben said, his eyes momentarily flickering to the blank canvas.

"Aw, come on Ben! Give it a shot!"

Zoe's cheerleading must have helped, because Ben dipped the brush and got to painting. His paintbrush swirled across the canvas at such a rapid pace, she could only imagine what sort of monstrosity he was creating. Five minutes after starting his masterpiece, he announced, "I'm done."

"Really? Already?"

Ben turned the easel so she could see his painting, and she had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing. It looked like something a six-year-old could paint, with a round head, half-moon ears and a pig's nose. "Do you love it?" he asked.

"Wow, Ben, you're really talented," she quipped. "I didn't know you could paint a Picasso in, like, five minutes!"

"Hey! Don't be sarcastic!" Ben wagged a finger at her. "I should tickle you for that."

"Oh yeah? I'd like you to come over here and try."

Ben started moving toward her, but he stopped before he got to her. He was rooted to the spot, mesmerized by her naked body. "Zoe..." he whispered her name. "I want you. I want to make love to you."

"Oh?" Even more surprising was the fact that she wanted him too, but she couldn't bring herself to say it.

"I want you more than I've ever wanted anything. I would give up the rest of my life for one night with you. I want to touch you, to kiss every inch of your body..." Ben's voice was soft and sincere. "Will you let me? Make love to you?"

"Are you sure?" Zoe rose from the sofa and moved closer. She reached out and gave his chest a gentle caress. "Are you sure you don't want to save something for later?"

"I don't think I can wait for later," Ben said with a chuckle, and with that, he scooped her off the ground and carried her to the bed. When she didn't utter a word of protest, he knew she was ready and willing. His lips scavenged the length of her body. He kissed her neck, her shoulders, her breasts. He trickled his fingers across her knee, down her thigh. When he dipped a finger inside her, Zoe let out a moan of approval.

Zoe grabbed the back of his head and pulled him down for a kiss. Her body writhed at his touch, her insides exploded as she smothered him with kisses. Ben positioned himself between her legs and kissed her lightly on the stomach. Three times.

"Zoe?"

"Mm?" She was so dizzy with passion, she barely recognized her own name.

"I love you."

"I love you too," Zoe said. She didn't even need to give it a second thought, because it was true. Suddenly, he was the most important person in her life. She loved Benjamin Eastham more than anyone in the world.

And he gave her the best shag of her life.

Chapter Twenty Nine

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

The other day, I saw a girl plucking her eyebrows on the London "tube." Seriously?! She's going to poke out her eye!

When Zoe woke up the next morning, she saw Ben lying beside her, waving a flower under her nose.

"Good morning," he said, bopping her nose with the tulip.

"Good morning."

"Are you still naked?" he asked, and took a peek beneath the covers. "Oh. How delightful. I see that you are!"

Zoe reclaimed the blanket and tucked it around her body. "Well... I should get some clothes on! Go get me one of your shirts."

"Do I have to? I rather like having you naked."

"A shirt!" Zoe insisted. "On the double!"

"If I must..." Ben handed the flower to Zoe and begrudgingly made his way to his dresser. He pulled out a t-shirt with a giant Union Jack on the front and tossed it at her.

As she pulled on the shirt, she accused, "you're trying to make me a British citizen with this!"

"Everyone wants to be a British citizen, don't they?" Ben teased. "You should marry me... that should expedite the process."

"Is that a proposal, Benjamin Eastham?"

"Perhaps." There was a twinkle in his eye that suggested it wasn't entirely a joke.

"Thanks for the flower," Zoe said, tickling the tip of her nose with the tulip.

"Of course. I brought breakfast too." Ben went to the counter and held up a bag of McDonald's. "I trust you won't say no to a Sausage and Egg McMuffin?"

"Sounds good to me." Zoe climbed out of the bed and approached him with a grin. She slid her arms around the back of his neck and coaxed him down for a kiss. He lifted her off her feet, and Zoe wrapped her legs around him. Ben carried Zoe--and the McDonald's bag--to the sofa.

"I'll have you out of that shirt soon enough," Ben vowed.

"Oh really?"

"I will."

"Well, good luck." Zoe scooted a few inches away from him and started unwrapping her sandwich. Three bites later, she said, "You know, the McDonald's is different here than it is in the US."

"Different how?"

"I don't know. It just... tastes different," Zoe said, examining her egg. "It's the egg, I think."

"Is it a good different or a bad different?"

"It's just... a different different." The next time she looked over at Ben, he was practically finished with his sandwich. "Geez! You really inhaled that."

"I'm a boy," he pointed out, which needed no explanation other than that. "Anyway, Gorgeous, I was hoping you and I could take a shower together?"

"Ahhh... I see. Is that your master plan to get me naked again?"

Ben reached toward her and ran a finger across her bare leg. "The only thing you're wearing is a shirt. You're practically naked as it is."

Ben's phone made a noise, which signaled he was receiving a text. While Ben was checking it, Zoe leaned over his shoulder and read it.

To Ben: r u takin the piss? im thinkig aliens abuducted u. o well she is rather fit. i hope ur shaggin her at least

"Who's that from?" Zoe asked.

"I'm sure you could guess."

"James?"

"Exactly."

"Wow, his spelling is atrocious," she commented. "What in the world is he even talking about?"

"Look at you, spying on my texts! Naughty girl!" Ben gave her a quick and playful slap on the bum. "I just got done telling him you were the love of my life. Judging from his response, he must think it's uncharacteristic of me."

"Aww... Ben." Zoe slid onto his lap and dragged her fingers through his hair. "You really told him that? That I'm the love of your life?"

"I did." Ben laid the phone on her lap, against her knee."You can check my outbox if you don't believe me."

"I believe you." Zoe kissed his chin, which sported the slightest cleft she had ever seen. "And it's really sweet."

"Does that mean we can have that shower then?" he suggested hopefully.

"I don't see why not."

That was all the affirmation Benjamin needed. As soon as Zoe consumed her final bite of McMuffin, he whisked her off the couch and into his arms. He carried her into the loo, deposited her on her feet, and started testing the water. As soon as he found the perfect temperature, he removed his clothes and popped the t-shirt off of Zoe's head. Then he carried her behind the glass and closed them in the shower together.

She was immediately stricken by how sexy he looked when he was wet, particularly his hair. The wet strands blanketed his eyes, and beads of water dripped down his square jaw. Zoe squeezed some shampoo into the palm of her hand and started washing his hair. As the suds engulfed his head, Zoe started giggling.

"What's so funny?"

"You look like a poodle," she said, snorting with laughter. "I think I used too much shampoo. My hair's a lot longer than yours, so I guess I misjudged."

Ben wasn't in the mood for jokes, not when he had a raging hard-on. He soaped up a wash cloth and ran it across her body. He washed her neck, her shoulders, and eventually, her breasts. As he gently scrubbed her body, Zoe let out a moan.

Some of the shampoo suds were dripping over his eyes, so Ben had to step under the shower head to rinse himself off. When he moved, it meant his backside was exposed to Zoe's probing eyes. Unable to resist, Zoe dealt a little slap to his butt.

"Heeey!" Ben made a tsking noise with his tongue. "You naughty girl. You just wanted to touch my arse, didn't you?"

"Of course!" she giggled. "Who wouldn't want to slap this?" She swatted him again. "It's the most amazing bum I've ever seen."

"Bum?" he repeated with a chuckle.

"Yeah. Bum. I've been trying to sound more British lately." When he turned around, Zoe started washing his chest with her bare hands. Of course, there wasn't much "washing" going on, she just wanted an excuse to rub him down.

"You are too adorable for words. Do you know that?"

Zoe nodded. "Uh huh."

"Cheeky girl." Ben tried to retaliate by tickling her, but his hands were rendered ineffective by the water. So he pinned her against the wall and started kissing all over her face. Then he trailed kisses down her neck, across her shoulder, over her chest--

Ben scooped Zoe off her feet and coiled her legs around his body. He could feel her breathing heavily; her chest heaved against his. Ben held her against the wall and inserted himself inside her.

And they made love in the shower.

Twice.

Chapter Thirty

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Sometimes you think you have everything figured out, and then life throws you a curve ball.

Everything was perfect for three days. Zoe enjoyed three days of blissful oblivion, with hardly a care in the world. She was drunk on Ben's affection, which he showered on her at all hours of the day. He had her convinced she really was the love of his life, and she was starting to think she felt the same way.

Their blissful content should have been enough--until her old reservations started creeping back. It started with an email from her mother.

Zoe,

I don't know if you're even reading these emails anymore since I haven't heard from you in days. Please let me know you're alright.

I talked to your grandmother on the phone today. I would really appreciate it if you could be there for her eightieth birthday. Is there any chance you might come home? When we were talking, I happened to mention your 20-year-old boyfriend. The first words out of her mouth (after she stopped laughing) were "what happened to Kyle?" You should really reconsider what you're doing, sweetheart. I know he did a bad thing, but Kyle was like a part of this family. Even my mother loved him!

I know it probably sounds like I'm meddling, and I'm sure you'll just delete this email, but I want you to know that I have your best interests at heart. You know what they say, right? Mother knows best!

"Mother knows best..." Zoe rolled her eyes as she read aloud. "Gag me."

Zoe didn't realize Ben was standing over her shoulder. When she heard him say, "What, sweetheart?" she nearly jumped out of her skin. She snapped the laptop shut, hoping he didn't see her email. She didn't want him to know about her entire family's pro-Kyle campaign.

"I-it's nothing," Zoe stammered.

Ben leaned down and kissed the top of her head. "So... I have a job interview today. I'm leaving in a few minutes."

"Oh! Well... good luck!"

"I'll bring back some takeaway. Do you have any special requests?"

"Umm... not really." Zoe kept eyeing the laptop. Even though he sounded cheerful, it killed her to think he might have read the email. "Surprise me."

"Alright." On his way out the door, Ben winked and said, "I guess we'll have to go to the States for your grandmum's birthday. And don't worry... I'll try extra hard to win them over."

"Ben!" Zoe shouted. He was out the door before she had a chance to reprimand him. He had a really bad habit of snooping on her emails.

When he was gone, Zoe reloaded her email and started writing a reply.

Mom,

I'm not getting back together with Kyle, okay??? End of discussion!!

But was it entirely true? In the deepest part of her heart, the part she had been trying to ignore, she wasn't completely closed off to the possibility of a rekindled romance with Kyle. She felt guilty for even thinking it was possible, because she knew how much it would hurt Ben.

She deleted the body of her email and started over.

Mom,

I just talked to Ben (my boyfriend, who is TWENTY-THREE by the way)... he made it sound like we might be coming for grandma's birthday. You would like to meet him, wouldn't you? I hope you'd be willing to give him a chance, because I

A knock on the door halted her fingers. Zoe slid off the couch and peered out the peephole.

It was Kyle!

Zoe wondered if he had somehow been summoned by her thoughts. She hadn't heard from him in three days, so she was starting to doubt he was still in London. She took a deep breath and pulled open the door. As soon as he saw her, Kyle swept her into his arms and nuzzled his lips against her hair.

"Zoe..." Kyle grumbled against her scalp. "I've missed you so much, sweetheart."

"Kyle... " Zoe peeled herself away from him and went back to the sofa.

"Is he here?"

"Who?"

"Who?!" Kyle repeated with a chuckle. "You know who I'm talking about. That guy... what's his name?"

"Ben."

"Right. Ben." Kyle sat beside her on the sofa and snaked an arm around her shoulders. "He's not here, is he?"

"No..."

"Good. Because I really wanted to talk to you." He pulled her as close to him as he possibly could. "I love you. I need you. And I'm not going to let you go that easily."

She tried to pull away from him, but he was holding her too tightly. "Kyle..."

"Just hear me out, okay? I don't want to go home without you. I don't want to go home until I know I've put up a good fight, because losing you would be the worst thing that could ever happen to me. Can you imagine what it'll be like for me? To go home to that empty house... to our house... and know you'll never be coming back? It would kill me, Zoe. I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with you, and I--"

"You ruined it," Zoe cut in.

"I know!" Kyle groaned. "Do you think I could ever get you to forgive me?"

Zoe almost nodded. At this point, she was starting to feel like she could forgive him. It would be so easy to go back to familiarity, back to normalcy and stability. Being in Britain with Ben was a new start, and new starts were always challenging. Sometimes she felt like she had uprooted herself, and she was having a hard time fitting in.

"But I'm with Ben..." she whispered.

"I know you are. But you need to think about that, Zoe. Where do you see that going?"

Zoe's head sunk between her shoulders. "I don't know."

"I'll tell you where it's going," Kyle continued his tirade. "He's what... 23? Where do you see yourself in two years? Five years? Do you really think he's ready to settle down, that he'd be ready to marry you?" He's practically a kid."

"You don't know him," Zoe defended her boyfriend. "He's very passionate and mature."

Kyle ignored her and went on, "are you really content to stay here in this dingy little London flat, with a college-age boyfriend? Does he even have a job? Do you know anything about him?!"

Zoe closed her eyes and let Kyle's words sink in. She knew she should have spoken up on Ben's behalf, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. It was hardly the first time she had felt foolish for dating someone so young.

"I know this will probably sound harsh, but... he'll get tired of you," Kyle said.

"Oh, you mean like YOU got tired of me?!"

"I didn't get tired of you. I could never get tired of you," Kyle protested. "What I made was a mistake, and it'll never happen again."

"Well..." Zoe crossed her arms over her chest and sat as straight as she could. She wanted to come off as proud, resolute. "I just don't know if I could trust you again, Kyle."

"But you trust this Ben guy? Really?!" There was a hint of exasperation in his voice. "When he's twenty-eight, you'll be thirty-seven. You really think that's going to work?"

"Well... when I'm seventy, he'll be sixty-one, and I don't think it's going to matter at that point."

"Wow, Zoe. It sounds like you've got your whole future planned out with this kid," Kyle sniped. "Does he know about that? Or would he run for the hills if he heard you talking like this?"

"He wouldn't!"

"He WOULD!" Kyle exclaimed. "Zoe, I know his type. He's not going to settle down with you. He isn't in this for a long-term commitment. And if you think he is, you're going to have a wake up call!"

"But you don't even know him..." Zoe reminded him.

"Yeah? Well, I know enough," Kyle said. "Anyway, Zoe, I care about you too much to let you make this kind of mistake. I care too much about us... as a couple. We were good together, weren't we?"

"We were," Zoe admitted quietly.

"And I think you owe it to yourself to give us another chance." Kyle took Zoe's chin between his thumb and forefinger and tilted her head in his direction. As he gazed into her eyes, he whispered, "I love you."

"I..."

"I love you," Kyle repeated, and leaned in for a kiss.

When his lips departed, Zoe's mind swirled with a million different thoughts. Maybe Kyle was right? Maybe Ben was too young for her. She had always had her doubts; maybe those doubts were warranted? How much time was she willing to waste on a relationship that had her feeling sheepish? Kyle, her mom, even her grandmother--it seemed that everyone wanted her to come home. She hadn't spoken to her friends in quite some time, but she knew they missed her too.

"Kyle?" Zoe whispered.

"Hmm?"

"I think you're right," Zoe said. "I think I do need to go back home."

Chapter Thirty One

Excerpt from Zoe's blog--

Heartbroken guys don't chase after their runaway girlfriends, do they? Not like in the movies...

Zoe left him a note. She knew it was the cruelest thing she could possibly do, but she couldn't imagine breaking up with him face-to-face.

Ben,

I'm really sorry... I know you're going to hate me for this, but I decided to go back home. Back to the US. I just don't think we should be together. I really, really care about you, but I can't imagine us in a long-term relationship. I'm not getting any younger, you know? I think long-term is what I need right now...

I really hope this isn't the last time I see you. You've come to mean so much to me. England will always have a special place in my heart... because of you.

Love,

Zoe

A tear slipped down her cheek as she composed her letter. Kyle was waiting for her at the door, so she swiped the tear before he could see it. Zoe felt an enormous amount of pressure around her heart and stomach. It was as if various parts of her anatomy were working together to change her mind. Because if she did change her mind, she knew the pain would go away.

"Are you ready to go?" Kyle asked.

Zoe looked around the apartment one last time, at the empty refrigerator, the old sofa, Ben's clothes that had been strewn beside the bed. Two days ago, she remembered looking at his discarded clothes and thinking she was the luckiest girl in the world. Out of all the women in the world, Ben had removed his clothes for her. Surely that made her lucky?

"I guess so..." she whispered. When she stepped through the doorway, she felt more heavy-hearted than ever. Was it really over? Her adventures in London, her tryst with Ben--it would always be a highlight of her life. But in a way, it was a relief to know she would be returning home, back to a comfortable routine. She didn't need any unpredictable factors upsetting her peace of mind.

At Zoe's insistence, Kyle took her back to the Savoy for one more night. In the back of her head, she kept hoping Ben would show up and miraculously change her mind. Several hours after arriving at the hotel, she knew he had read her letter by now--and yet he hadn't tried to contact her. She thought he would send her a text, call her on the phone, or do something to sway her decision. Would he really be content with never seeing her again?

"Stupid Zoe..." she softly chided herself. "You are the one that left him. Why would you expect him to come chasing after you?"

Kyle had chased after her, had he not? Maybe Kyle had more backbone, and she definitely needed a man with backbone. Specifically, she needed a man--not a boy who might tire of her in a few months' time.

Her mom and Kyle were right. She and Ben were a mismatch and that's all there was to it!

"But I loved him!" Zoe shouted, sobbing into her pillow. "I loved him!" There was a crushing weight around her heart, and she had no one to blame but herself. She was the mastermind behind her anguish, the catalyst of her despair. The heartbreaking decision was hers to make, and now she had to live with it.

"It'll get easier with time..." Zoe whispered assurances to herself. "Just wait. You'll get back home... get back into the groove... everything will be okay."

At some point, she would have to forget about Benjamin Eastham. He would be a scar on her heart, and she would have to move on.

Zoe and Kyle spent the night in separate bedrooms, despite the fact that he was begging to have her in his arms. After enjoying dinner at the Savoy's restaurant, Kyle informed her that he had already booked a return flight home. "And I hope you appreciate it," he said, "because the last minute tickets were highway robbery."

They had to be at Heathrow at 10 A.M. tomorrow, which meant Zoe would have to wake up early to catch an international flight. She laid awake, tossing and turning, staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. Ben was the only thing she could think about. She missed his face, the feeling of his hands on her skin, and his perfectly posh British accent. She kept her cell phone close, hoping he would call her or text her. A few times, Zoe thought about sending a text to him, but she didn't want to give him any mixed signals. Her mind was made. She was going to go home, back to the United States, and nothing was going to stop her.

Not even the fact that she was in love with a British boy.

* * *

Zoe thought about asking Kyle to return to Lewis' house to collect her things, but it just wasn't worth it. Kyle had given her an empty duffle bag, which she used to pack her sparse belongings. "At least I won't have to check any baggage," she whispered to herself.

Having not slept at all, Zoe looked frightful. Her eyes were surrounded by bags, and she could hardly keep them open. They were puffy too--the fact that she cried her eyes out probably had something to do with it. As she stared at herself in the fluorescent light of the bathroom mirror, she thought she was vaguely reminiscent of a haunted house horror.

And she realized something else.

"I never cried for Kyle..." she whispered to herself. "Never. Not even one tear."

She met Kyle in the lobby, and he was kind enough to take her bag. But his kind gesture was overshadowed by a less-than-kind comment. "You look a little worse for wear. Did you have a rough night?"

"You could say that."

"But you're happy to be coming home?"

Zoe didn't think he would like her answer, so she kept her mouth shut. She squared her shoulders and charged out of the hotel, where a taxi was waiting for them outside.

And so was Ben.

Zoe didn't see him right away, since his presence was hardly expected. Before she could climb into the cab, Ben reached out and grabbed her arm.

"Zoe..."

When she turned around and saw his face, her heart was flooded with a plethora of emotions--the most prevalent one being relief.

"BEN!" Zoe squealed. Her purse slipped off her arm and tumbled to the sidewalk, but she didn't care. Her reaction was unexpected, even to her. She pounced on Ben, wrapped her legs around him, and smothered him with kisses. As overwhelmed as she was, it took her a moment to realize he wasn't returning her kisses. Her mouth was all over him, but his lips were as limp as Kyle's humor.

"Zoe..." he repeated her name with a note of irritation, and he put her on her feet. "You can't expect me to be happy right now."

"But you came!" she shrilled. "I'm so glad you came! I was about to make--"

"The biggest mistake of your life," Ben finished for her. "I can't believe you'd be so heartless that you would leave me. Twice. After everything we've been through!"

Behind her, Kyle cleared his throat, but Zoe didn't bother to acknowledge him. The only thing that mattered was that Ben was standing in front of her, and that he would save her from her insanity. "You aren't mad at me, are you?"

"Of course I'm angry!" Ben shouted. He held a hand against his chest, over his heart. "You're going to break me... break my heart! I had so much love for you. I put myself out there, and you crush me. You keep crushing me."

"Ben..."

"I'll never be good enough for you, will I?"

"AHEM!" Kyle pushed an arm between them, creating a wedge between the reunited couple. "Zoe... are we going to leave or what? We have a plane to catch."

"Oh, piss off!" Ben snapped. "This has nothing to do with you!"

"It has everything to do with me!" Kyle objected. "Zoe's coming with me, and if you're going to dispute that, I--"

This time, it was Zoe who spoke up. "Kyle... I really do think you should piss off."

"Zoe?!" The shrill shock in Kyle's voice was comical, almost cartoonish. "Are you serious?! You're going to choose him over me? I just booked a flight for you... a really expensive fucking flight! If you're not going to come, you better pay me back!"

"Kyle..." Zoe laid her hand against his chest and gave him a little shove. "Thanks for making my decision so much easier. I'll be sure to pay you back whenever I get the chance."

"Maybe your twelve-year-old boyfriend will give you the money... assuming he even has a job!" As Kyle walked off, they could hear him murmuring under his breath, "Stupid... can't make a decision and stick with it... why did I even bother?"

When Kyle got in the taxi and sped off, Zoe scooped her purse off the ground and turned her attention back to Ben. "I'm sorry..." she whispered.

From his pocket, Ben pulled out a slip of paper, which she recognized almost immediately. It was her note. "Do you know I've read this at least twenty times?" When he started to unfold it, she snatched it out of his hand.

"Ben, don't read it!"

"It doesn't matter if I read it. I've memorized it!" he said. "I don't think we should be together... I can't imagine us in a long-term relationship. Is that really how you feel?!"

"No!"

"Then why did you say it?! And what would have happened if I hadn't come? Would you go back to the States and forget all about me?!"

"Of course not!" Zoe exclaimed. "It's just that... everyone was putting a lot of pressure on me. Kyle... my mom. I didn't know what to do!"

"And why do you let other people dictate your life?!" Ben snapped. "You can't make your decisions based on how others feel... you have to pay attention to how you feel. If you let others make decisions for you, you'll never have what you want."

Zoe hanged her head in shame. Ben's words made a lot of sense. He was younger than her, but he might have been wiser. "You're right. You're absolutely right."

People kept passing them on the busy sidewalk, and they were attracting more than a few stares from curious passersby. Zoe grabbed his hand and pulled him into the hotel lobby, where they continued their discussion.

"I wasn't sure I would be able to sway you on my own..." Ben said. "So I went to Stevenage... to visit Chris. He wrote you a note."

"Chris?!" Zoe was overcome by a fresh wave of guilt. "W-well what did he have to say?"

Ben pulled out another slip of paper and handed it to her. Chris' messy scrawl was unmistakeable.

Uncle Ben said you were leaving, but I don't want you to go. I have two new friends at school but you are still my favourite one. I know I made things hard for you sometimes but you really are my best mate. You made me feel better about stuff when no one else could. if you stay, I promise I'll be better.

When she finished reading the note, a tear slipped from her eye. She smashed the tear against her cheek and drew a deep breath.

"I feel... terrible," she said. "I wasn't thinking."

"How could you leave your boys?" Ben asked, pouting. "Isn't is obvious that we need you? That we love you?"

"I love you too! Ben..." Zoe slipped her arms around him and pulled him closer, until she could rest her head against his chest. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry!"

"How am I suppose to believe that I'm the one you want to be with?" Ben's voice crackled a bit, as if he was on the verge of tears. "What if you leave me again? If I'm going to put my heart on the line, I need to know you won't break it."

"I won't!" she shouted, as adamantly as she could. "I swear I won't. You're the one I want, Ben. You've always been the one I want."

"I've never loved anyone before... no one but you."

When Ben started running a hand through her hair, Zoe thought she might pass out. She had never felt anything so wonderful. "Do you mean that?"

"I do!" Ben exclaimed. "You're my first love. Honest. That's why it kills me when you say you wouldn't want a long-term relationship."

"I do want a long-term relationship with you!" Zoe insisted. "I just... I wasn't sure that's what you wanted."

"OF COURSE that's what I want. I'm not the one who ran out on you yesterday!"

"I'm sorry!" she trilled. "I want to be with you, I love you, and I don't care what anyone else thinks."

"You swear it?"

"Yes!" Zoe nodded so adamantly, she felt her neck pop. "I swear!"

"Very well..." Ben tapped the tip of her nose with his forefinger. "Then I forgive you."

Ben cupped her cheek in the palm of his hand and leaned down to kiss her, long and hard. Had they been paying attention to anything but themselves, they might have noticed the mustached receptionist who was staring at them like they were crazy.

"Ben?" Zoe stared into his eyes, those golden brown eyes she loved so much.

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Can I go home now?"

"Back to the flat?"

"No... back into your arms," Zoe corrected him with a grin. "That's home."